Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Mooshki - Movie Review - Watchmen

WARNING: there are some MILD SPOILERS in this review.

There are already tons of “Watchmen” reviews out there, so I thought I’d focus on what’s of the most interest to CDaNers, namely Jeffrey Dean Morgan. After reading yesterday’s comments, I know I’m not the only one who thinks he’s sexily adorable. Usually. I had been warned about his attempted rape scene, but I hadn’t realized how brutal it is. He wallops the crap out of Carla Gugino (speaking of whom, I had never realized just quite how sexy her voice is before this - it gave me chills). He also shoots a woman who is pregnant with his child. This is not the Grey’s Anatomy Jeffrey Dean Morgan we know and love (lust after). And you thought Dead Denny from this season’s “Grey’s” was bad. :) Even though he’s so brutal, being Jeffrey Dean Morgan, you just want to wrap your arms around him and remind him that there’s good in the world. Sadly, on that front it’s also a bit disappointing, because he isn’t in the film nearly as much as he should’ve been. (Maybe half an hour out of a 2hr 40min movie.)

For fans of FFF, Billy Crudup’s Dr. Manhattan provides us with full frontal galore! He’s no Snoop Dogg, but I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.

There’s another of my favorite hotties in the movie - Patrick Wilson. They tried to bulk him up for the part (he’s kind of a superhero retired and gone to mush), with a combination of real weight gain and a fat suit, but as my friend said: “They failed to disguise that hot ass.” Since I know DNfromMN will ask ;), Patrick gets naked for a sex scene - no full frontal for him, sadly, but nothing else is hidden. (And for those of you who swing the other way, Malin Ackerman is buck naked and gorgeous too.)

The man who plays Rorschach is amazing (don’t look up the actor before you see it or you’ll spoil a good chunk of the movie). And his flowing inkblot mask is mesmerizing - one of the coolest effects in the movie.

This movie is not going to blow your mind, like, say, “The Dark Knight” or “Spiderman II” did. I think it’s too choppy to make a great 'film' - it’s very much a graphic novel put into motion. But this leads to some truly stunning imagery, and very vivid sequences. I deliberately didn’t read the graphic novel before I saw the movie, and it often felt like there was some background I was missing. From what my friends said, those questions aren’t necessarily answered there either. It’s probably just too complex a story to have real depth without being way too long. (As said above, the movie is almost 3 hours, but it didn’t ever drag for me, except in the beginning.) I am definitely going to have to read the book and see it again, though. It’s a very dark movie (literally and metaphorically), but in the end, also hopeful.

One last warning: as you may have guessed from the JDM section, this is a violent movie. I was expecting it to be more of the cartoonish-type violence, but it’s very realistic, and very brutal. I had to cover my eyes a number of times.

On the DN scale, I'd pay $10 to see it.

25 comments:

twunty mcslore said...

Thanks, Mooshki. Definitely read the book, it is really layered and it takes a few rereads to catch everything in it. I can't wait til Friday, I'm such a nerd.

DNfromMN said...

Thanks for letting me know, Moosh. I was planning on seeing this one this weekend anyway (assuming there are open seats).

And for those who want a taste of Patrick's ass you can click here (from Little Children).

a said...

thank you sooo much, i'm more stoked than ever knowing that Patrick gets naked

you can never disguise his hot ass

also, why would the actor's name spoil the movie? huh? he deserves the shout-out

Mooshki said...

DN, actually, I was SHOCKED to see that the screening didn't fill up until right before the movie started. At the initial seating of the big line, probably only 4/5 of the theater was filled. I really hope that wasn't a sign of things to come - I would like for this movie to do well.

Sylvia said...

I've read mix reviews on this movie.

DNfromMN said...

Mooshki - Who was doing the screening? And where was it? The Rosedale ones tended to be quieter than the Southdale ones.

Even shitty movies like Semi-Pro had long ass lines. Back when I was going to them we would have to show up about an hour ahead of time to get somewhere in the middle of the line. Now I'm not on the prowl for tickets like I used to be, but I still get the FilmMetro emails and I saw NOTHING show up for watchmen.

Mooshki said...

a, he shows up in the first part of the movie both in costume and out of it in the background, but you don't know that it's him. Halfway through the movie he takes his mask off and I was surprised at who he was. If you look up a picture of the actor right now, that surprise will be spoiled. It's like how Kevin Spacey had them not put his name in the opening credits of Se7en.

Mooshki said...

DN, it was at Southdale.

"Even shitty movies like Semi-Pro had long ass lines."

That's why I was so surprised! I've seen many far inferior films that were much more crowded. They gave out the Gofobo code on Vita.mn, and it "sold out" very quickly, which added to my surprise at the relatively poor turnout. The theater guys said that they gave out over a thousand tickets for a 4-500 seat theater.

Mooshki said...

Sylvia, I'm not surprised at that. I don't think it really works as a movie.

jenna (original) said...

great review mooshki!

Mooshki said...

Thanks!

B626 said...

BIG P.R. push on GMA this morning. Somebody up there is really worried.

Mooshki said...

By the way, thanks Enty for posting this, and thanks to all you guys for commenting. After that guy complained last time Enty posted one of mine, I was reluctant to do another. If it weren't for the reaction to Jeffrey Dean Morgan in the pics yesterday, I probably wouldn't have done this one. I know I'm not a great reviewer or anything, but at least I think I know what my CDaNers like! :)

lutefisk said...

Please keep reviewing--I enjoy reading everyone's opinions, especially yours Mooshki.
I am not sure if this is the type of movie I want to see right now, but your review was great!

GladysKravitz said...

Well, I'm glad you reviewed it. Someone I don't really like told me he wanted to see it, so I've been thinking I wouldn't like it. Your review changed my mind.

Mooshki said...

Uh oh, that's a lot of responsibility to put on me, Gladys. If you hate it, promise not to beat me. LOL!

jax said...

nice job Moosh.

bionic bunny! said...

i didn't even know anything about this one... i still call the dang thing comic books, so, thanks, moosh!

melissa said...

Good review, Moosh. Will probably see this at home and thanks for the heads up about not looking at who plays Rorschach.

Ms. said...

Good work, Mooshki!

Cheysu said...

Thanks for the review. It is a relief to read a review from a real person rather than the drivel a "professional" reviewer is paid to write.

And yes, most of us will watch ANYTHING with JDM in it.

If you like, you should watch season 1 of Supernatural. John Winchester kicks Denny's ass two ways to Sunday.

stiffkittens said...

Great job Mooshki - thanks for the heads up about the rape scene (i'm very squeamish about that kind of thing)!

Yeah, you can get the plot summary from 9/10 reviews, but only at CDAN can you get a breakdown of hot naked time.
I think it should be mandatory for that to be included in every review (maybe also include a score ;)). With the exception of the GMD of course - please let his Eyes Wide Shut part 2 idea never see fruition! Joey Potter does not do sexy times...

Cirse said...

The book is fantastic, I suggest everyone give that a whirl regardless if what you think of the movie. You know how movies struggle to do justice to books.

Tania said...

Thanks for the review, Mooshki. Yes, you have our perspective just right! ;-)

I'm probably going to see it this weekend, despite the low percentage of JDM (I'd worked that out, since other reviews say why The Comedian is not there most of the time). It's nice to know that I'll also get some hot nekkid ass to look at!
Unfortunately the glowing blue schlong is CGI, not Crudup's little Billy. Or perhaps, fortunately - who knows?

Mooshki said...

Cheysu, oh yeah, I loved him on Supernatural! There's so much pretty on that show, even now that he's gone. Sigh...

Tania, it's high-quality CGI then, lol! It's probably for the best, since he's such an asshole. Now I don't have to feel guilty about looking.

Cirse, oh yeah, I'm definitely going to read the book now. I didn't want to before seeing the movie, because I was afraid the movie would be a big letdown if I had.