Friday, January 13, 2012

Axl Rose Does Jury Duty


Yeah, that bloated guy sitting over in the jury box with the hair that used to be thick and long but now is a scraggly semblance of its former self. Yeah, that guy who is deciding your fate in a civil trial is Axl Rose. Most of the time when celebrities show up for jury duty, they are never selected. Not so with Axl Rose. The former singer for the good version of Guns N Roses and now the lead singer for the bad version of Guns N Roses, Axl served four days on a civil jury deciding a case. Want to know what his biggest thought about doing his civic duty was?

He got to see daylight. Seriously, it was the first time he had got up that early four days in a row in forever.

39 comments:

nolachickee said...

I can't believe that both his bloated body and his ego fit inside the jury box.

Rita said...

Wow, he sure has changed. That man's ego rivals any North Korean Dick-tator.

Syko said...

Funny how those with the biggest egos are the ones with the least to be egotistical about.

I'm not sure how I'd feel if Axl Rose were on a jury in my trial.

lzahart said...

ha ha this is hilarious I would have honestly PAID to be on a jury with Axl! When I was 14 I honestly thought i was going to marry him. Luckily for me sanity prevailed. But would love to see him up close in his current bizarre state.

@Rocket Queen- OT but meant to get back to you previously- you must have a comment here given the awesome source of your screen name-- great song BTW. Yes I think we would be great friends IRL. Btwn GnR, the Wire, the Method Mad for short Mr. Meth aka Cheese... not to mention that your comments are always awesome and entertaining. Pretty sure we would have a lot of fun together (but it might be unhealthy).

pilly said...

I can't believe Stephanie Seymour bonked him. ICK

Jasmine said...

This man will have a pass for life from me for the song Sweet Child Of Mine. Him and Slash rocked the shit out of that song and I grew up with my mom and I doing that sideways dance Axl did.

I dont understand why he looks so tore up now. Is it drugs? I didnt know drugs effed your hair up and made you bloated like this, not to mention took away your sexy mojo. If so, Kilmer, Spader,Shatner and Axl all must be on the same shit :-P

Jasmine said...

I will admit, the idea of freaking Axl Rose in a jury is fucking hilllariouss.

Wonder if he wore this outfit to court??? lolol

ABlake said...

To be fair, when Stephanie went there, he was sexy. Maybe not traditionally 'hot' but seeeeexy

I agree about being in the jury room arguing and discussing the case with Axl freakin' Rose

Jessica said...

Even in his heyday his hair was thin thin thin. Of course it was the 80's so many times it was pumped up with a comb and hairspray, but when it was straight, it was straggly even back then.

RenoBlondee said...

^Exactly. Not hot, but sexy as hell.

EmEyeKay said...

I liked G&R when they were new. Axl was sexy back then, and I loved that dance he did. I think I still have G&R Lies on TAPE. Appetite was such a good album, so many memories associated with it.

When we leave to go to school it's dark, on my way back the sun is just coming up, and I've seen some beautiful sunrises lately. Dude needs to get up early more often.

Maja. With a J. said...

I was OBSESSED with Guns n' Roses. "Appetite For Destruction" still ranks among the best rock albums ever made and is probably in my personal All Time Top 5. That record CHANGED me, man!

I saw them live a couple of times. The first time, I CRIED. Seriously. They played "Patience" and I cried out all my pent up teenage angst. Good grief. I was pathetic! *L*

Danielle said...

Guess I'm the only one who thinks it's pretty cool of him to carry out his civic duty. You just know there would be a way to get out of it if he really wanted to. I don't really get all the snark about it.. Seems like he went, did what he needed to do and was probably bored to death like the rest of us. So he's not hot anymore and probably quite eccentric.
I LOVE Guns n Roses! :)

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

I always thought he was a greaseball. My bff at the time, circa elementary school, was so into him that she copied his style to the best of her ability.

I guess I can't really judge too harshly because I was that way with Eddie Vedder. Now there's a fella I could sink my teeth into back in the day.

Sorry for the tangent.

Danielle said...

^ I will ALWAYS love Eddie Vedder and I STILL thinks he's hot!

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

I will fight you for him!!!! Srsly.

And Maja, at least you were a teenager. I got a lump in my throat as an adult the first time I saw PJ.

lzahart said...

Sue Ellen am guilty of your best friend's crime I purchased a pair of (wait for it) CRUSHED VELVET BIKE SHORTS and rocked them bc Axl did. Seriously. Embarrassing!

Interesting contrast you bring up.... I think Vedder has gotten much hotter w age, and Axl, well, see above photo.

Rita said...

Appetite for Destruction is one of those albums that shakes the shit out of your life. On par with George Michael's Listen Without Prejudice. Just changes you!

And you'll always remember where you were, and what you were doing when you first heard "Don't you Cry".

TMI moment, I was in Rome, having my full first sexual encounter. Yep, ol' Rita was blessed by the Pope that night.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Bahaha@Izahart!

She never went *that* far, and I thought her rocking his hairstyle (she's also a ginge) was bad!

Though, velvet is quite comfortable.

lzahart said...

@SEM- er comfy, yet not flattering, even on a 14 year old girl less figure than a ruler. i can't even imagine the camel toe action i no doubt had going on. temporary insanity is an excuse for anything you did as a teenager right :)

and @rita yes "Don't Cry" was the #2 most awesome song to slow dance to in middle school... only beat by Stairway, and that's just bc it was long enough you could make out for a long time during it. Remember the video??? RIP Shannon Hoon now that I think about it.

Oh god am I old.

Jasmine said...

You're so friggin cute Maja!!!

RocketQueen said...

No Danielle, you're not the only one :) I just came in to say "Good for him!" I've always wanted to do jury duty. Hope I get the chance.

If you ever come up to Vancouver, lzahart, you let me know :)

GnR forever! I must have worn out my copy of Use your Illusion I and II listening to "Don't Cry". And of course...Appetite for Destruction and Rocket Queen. I might be a little young but honey you're a bit obsceeeene...

RocketQueen said...

PS lzahart - bring those shorts! lol

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

The big song to dance to for us was November Rain. And the teachers would come and push people apart that were too close.

Sigh.

Sometimes I wish I could go back, but then I look at facebook and am glad I don't have to deal with those assholes anymore.

Maja. With a J. said...

What about the video for "Estranged"...where Axl swam with motherfucking DOLPHINS. I thought it was the most epic thing ever shown on MTV's Headbanger's Ball.

Rita said...

@Izahart - oh you just reminded me of school dances! Wow, I remember how we used to superglue while slow dancing, and be all horny and teenager like.

The good old days.

Maja. With a J. said...

...and cue Maja singing the "Estranged" guitar solo out loud, in the office. I ought to be ashamed of myself, but alas, that has never happened.

Sherry said...

I have nothing to add to this string that could ever be as remotely interesting as what everyone else has said here. You guys are serious entertainment! Thanks for the laughs...Now next time Enty does pics I sure hope to see someone in velvet shorts.

Sherry said...

Oh and Rita? ITA on Listen Without Prejudice..It is nothing short of revelatory. Really.

RocketQueen said...

Dammit, Maja. Now Estranged is in my head, too.

lutefisk said...

Axl Rose? I thought that was Xtina.

txtommom said...

I loves appetite for distruction. First CD I ever bought. (I found my tshirt from that tour last night). I would watch a reality show featuring Axl. Would be very interesting as you know he must be bat $hit crazy. How cool would it be if E replaced the kartrashians with Axl?

Lelaina Pierce said...

I don't think they knew it was Axl...he looks like Dog The Bounty Hunter!!

Who didn't love GnR back in the day? My friend & I used to do a (bad) impression of Axl on "My World" (You wanna step into my world!") and would dissolve into a fit of giggles. Ahh, youth.

mynerva said...

Can I ask a stupid question? Surely Axl did something in his past that would preclude him from jury duty?

Betty K said...

cosign @Danielle... I'm late to this sausage party and after cursory review and seeing no props for his service...

Thanks @danielle. He did what we are supposed to do.

Granted, when I retire I want jury duty to be my second career.

The only time I had jury duty was in Portland OR. I was on the same floor as the Tonya Harding trial. Enjoyed my time but really wished I made it to that.

skydives1 said...

I saw Weird Al Yankovic in court one day. He was serving on a civil jury in Santa Monica. If my trial had only gone one trial earlier, I would have definitely chose him. I got a news anchor instead.

Mother Campfire said...

Although he totally turns me off, I have to admit that one of my top 5 songs is Estranged. True story.

Amy in MI said...

Axl is seriously bipolar. Maybe he is on a medication cocktail, which most anti-psychotics make you bloat.

And yes, I had a major crush on him... I don't remember where I was when I heard "Don't Cry" but I remember watching the You Could Be Mine over and over to see Axl's package!

MadLyb said...

Oh Axl, you used to be so hot. You used to have, 'It'. Then you started doing stupid stuff like breaking bottles over old ladies heads. Wha happened? :(