Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Off Topic

I'm fairly certain that nothing I have ever bought from television or an infomercial has ever worked.

73 comments:

Renoblondee said...

I got those turn a tortilla into a taco salad bowl thingies. :( nope.

FSP said...

Too fat for a snuggie?

Kristin (Wiglet) said...

You obviously haven't tried Tater Mitts.

Angela said...

George Foreman Grill! I've been using mine since college, chicken in 8 minutes & my Mother got it for me (she's a notorious infomercial buyer).

derek harvey said...

I bought the NoNo for my pubes. It could not handle all this...

sandybrook said...

SHAMWOW doesn't work? Fucking Vince!

aemish said...

LOL wth are Tater Mitts?

Bally said...

I used to work for a company that sold that crap on TV. Trust me, you never get what you pay for.

Count Jerkula said...

Try buying something other than Extenze.

aemish said...

I <3 my Wolfgang Puck pans from HSN and the Orgreenic pans from the commercials...

Seven of Eleven said...

I had a neighbor who was addicted to QVC/HSN. I told her you can get stuff cheaper at Amazon but she didn't believe me. She said if Amazon's stuff was just as good, they'd be smart enough to start an Amazon channel and show off the wares.

When she told she was once a professional hairdresser and offered to cut my hair, I politely declined. The Flow-Bee box on the curb on trash day was but one of the reasons.

derek harvey said...

The worst ones are the Joan Rivers ones...I saw one where she was covering peoples bald spots with make-up and charging like 100 bucks for something that looked like basic make-up

rajahcat said...

tater mitts (pouches?) do work

aemish said...

OH yaaaa.. Joan has the Right To Bare Legs stuff

Sugar said...

I bought a chillow for a friend going through menopause. She loves it.

I looooove infomercials! Especially that crazy one with that scary green nonstick pan that is so nonstick you can deposit your fried egg to your plate simply by blowing on it!!!!!

VIPblonde said...

@Seven Flowbee gif assist :)

aemish said...

Those ceramic pans are AWESOME.

MISCH said...

Oxi-Clean is super

Kristin (Wiglet) said...

Tater Mitts! Make yourself some handmade french fries or give someone a devastating hand job. This guy sold separately.

Amy said...

No, but I have some As Seen on TV items that have been given to me as gag gifts that I actually love. The spaghetti boat, for example, is really actually great -- you just stick the spaghetti straight in it, don't need to ever stir it, pop it in the microwave to boil (it does take the full 13 minutes or whatever, but you can do other stuff while it cooks) and voila, perfect.

aemish said...

Kathy Griffin wore her pajama jeans to a show one time :p

Harry Knuckles said...

Seven, we actually had a Flow-Bee. And it sort of worked. It was also terrifying.

aemish said...

Ew! Those tater mitts have herpes

DizzyBlueBaby said...

Eggies suck.

Violet said...

Insanity DVD. But I think I might have actually been meant to put a bit of effort in.

aemish said...

I've got my insanity dvds right here in my bookcase.... they 3-4 yearare still old and still in the shrink wrap

Anothergrayhare said...

FSP you made me laugh out loud. The SlapChop is useless, onions just get jammed up in it and you have to take it apart to get anything out, cutting the sh*t out of your hands in the process from the blades. Love the George Foreman Rotisserie, found a brand new one in my late uncle's belongings and it works great.

Sherry said...

LOL Sandyboo!

Sherry said...

The Opster so wants a Flowbee. Anyone have a used one for sale. He loves a deal and a mullet.

Sherry said...

Before we took away the car the MIL would drink and order (she can't buy herself any wine now). Luckily we were able to cancel and return a shit ton of Cindy Crawford's Eternal Beauty.

Seven of Eleven said...

LOL @ the gif!! That's exactly how I feel!

@Harry, I can't even imagine. I think that's what a cat would feel like when you turn on the vacuum cleaner (though I have seen cats who *like* to be vacuumed, but only on YouTube so I wonder if it's a myth).

Heeeey, Sherry! Opster the Mullet Man! :D

Wen said...

I love how they make the simplest chore look like hard manual labor. They wipe the sweat off their brow and have a look of frustration. Whoa is me! There has to be a easier way!

Anyway, my fave is the PedEgg. I use it all the time.

Wen said...

I love how they make the simplest chore look like hard manual labor. They wipe the sweat off their brow and have a look of frustration. Whoa is me! There has to be a easier way!

Anyway, my fave is the PedEgg. I use it all the time.

aemish said...

Chaz Dean's Wen conditioning shampoo is awesome.. but I don't use it as shampoo, I use it only as conditioner

FS said...

I bought the Escape Your Shape workout years ago, VHS not even dvd. Its actually not a bad workout I should probably dig it out and give it another try.

AKM said...

No way, Enty. ProActiv is a life-saver, WEN is great, and I love my Nu-Wave oven. Frozen chicken cooked in 18 minutes! Come on.

RowdyRodimus said...

The pocket hose things are awesome. the trick is you can't let it just sit hooked up year round. My Dad has had one since they first started advertising them and it works as well now as it did the day he got it in. Just take it off the spigot, put it in a bucket or something and put in the garage for the next time. They're awesome.

As for other As Seen on TV things, I usually just wait until I find them at the Dollar Tree and pick them up. I got one thing that's like a Flowbee but it's battery powered and for getting loose hair off pets that works great and I also picked up about 24 of those Kansas City Pocket Watches that I gave to the boys in my Aunts 3rd grade class during my Santa visit last year, they all loved them.

Ian's Girl said...

Well damn, does this mean I shouldn't get that hose thing? I want one so bad. Pocket Hose, I think it's called?

tennis peach said...

I have bought the lint lizard, bully grout and something else that I cannot remember, but NONE of them worked the way they did on TV!

Jason Blue Eyes said...

There was an awesome infomercial on at 3 in the morning over the weekend for Proactiv. Shilling for the product was Adam Levine, Katy Perry, Diddy and Naya Rivera. I was 1/2 asleep but Naya sure woke me up.

There's a store in the mall near me that sells all that shown on TV crap. $60 for Green Tea weight loss capsules you can buy at a pharmacy for $15. Pfft. Total gyp, man.

yodelay said...

@sugar, I agree. I got the hollow for my son who runs way hot. He loves it!

VIPblonde said...

Oh hayyy, @Jason!

yodelay said...

*chillow

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

My tater mitt caught on fire. And it didn't even produce fried tater.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

2nd this. Only cleaning is sort of a B. Oh, and don't forget and leave a breast in there and then take off for a long weekend.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

I found one at discount store g

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

Got one. Use it often!!

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

OMG. I did luv it, BUT 1. Naturally they wouldn't stop billing and shipping, and shipping me the wrong "flavor" to boot...400 later... Now 2- the Shheeet won't rinse out if my hair! It takes a good 20 mins of rinsing along with vinigat or baking soda

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

I bought one that sprang a leak in a week. And it wasn't very long. I like a long hose.

MadLyb said...

I rarely buy stuff. I just wait for my sister to get sucked in by an informational and either give me the other half of a two-for-one special or for her to upgrade and give me her old stuff. I got a Magic Bullet, Wicker Armoir, Roku, laptop and a huge HDTV that way.

sugarbread maker said...

i want the veghetti to make squash and zucchini past. walmart has them for 15
wen was great 1st week then my hair was greasy after that. i use redkin now . wen is on qvc too

califblondy said...

Super Smile is great for white teeth, but I hate the membership part of it so I cancelled and bought it off Amazon.

derek harvey said...

@sugarbread---I saw Boy George (of all people) on a cooking show making zucchini pasta but eating it raw. Raw zucchini is so nasty though...

Gayeld said...

They don't have very good water pressure, either. Too skinny.

Gayeld said...

I didn't get through TV (Amazon, baby), but if they did sell them that way, our Roku was awesome. And I loved my George Foreman grill (but, yes, it is a B to clean.)

sugarbread maker said...

@derek. i would need it with olive oil or light butter or pesto.
had spaghetti squash at a restaurant once and it was great. maybe a little garlic and oil to it.

Cocoa said...

Why was your breast in the George Foreman grill?....... @Sincerely ;-))

Mama Abroad said...

I managed 4 days until I got a leg cramp so bad I had my father in law examining my leg to see if I had a blood clot. Back to the shelf!

Pugs Andkisses said...

Well played...

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

That Clear TV one is completely ridiculous. They make it sound like some revolutionary new product that lets you get craploads of TV channels for free.

The reality: It's a TV antenna! The same things our grandparents adjusted while watching tonight's new episode of "I Love Lucy."

Jason Blue Eyes said...

To you, V.

BitchieMitchie said...

The Moving Men. Bought them 16 years ago, still use them still love them!

BeckyMae said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BeckyMae said...

I really want to get one of these for Mr Mae...he spends hours in there so he may as well work on his putt!

­ Potty Putter

Cee Kay said...

I bought a set of knives once and they still work great even ten years later, but they ended up costing WAY more than advertised.

I really wanna get me one of those countertop convection oven thingys, but I just can't justify the expense. Can't wait until DS goes off to university! "Honey, he NEEDS one! He can't cook in his dorm room! Maybe I'll just test it first..."

Anothergrayhare said...

I bought a "Zoodler" on eBay to make zucchini noodles and curly fries. I love it. Never saw an informercial for it though.

Erik said...

I've never bought any crap, but I love the cheesy infomercials.

audrey said...

My youngest was fascinated with the Magic Bullet. Her dad got us one, but not from TV. It made great smoothies.

The Enquirer said...

I like the Nutri Bullet too, although I bought mine from Target, so I guess it doesn't count. I use it almost daily.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

Hahaha. Good 1 Cocoa!
I'll never do that again.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

Plus I'm a sucker for gay men with overbites, stubble, good hair and big teeth. I wanted to be Hag of Chaz. That was till that Guthrie Ranker over billed me.

Sincerely,Your Friend said...

Good pressure is vital. Thicker would be nice too.

Maureen said...

Bet you have auto correct.