Friday, April 27, 2007

Ted C Blind Item

Here I go again: another damn Vice ‘bout yet another limp-wristed Hollywood hubby. And I use the antigay terminology only because it’s deserved in this sitch.

Fey Ray had it all. Beautiful woman. Gorgeous friends, hangers-on and so forth—all the accompanying high-life accoutrements that strangely just seem to come to heterosexual couples playing house, so rarely the gay ones, save Ellen ‘n’ Portia.

Fey-stud also had such nice teeth (I know, I have a thing with sparkling molars and incisors, so please forgive me). But he also had a penchant for little boys—nothing underage, mind you—something his gal was actually okay with!

Still. It wasn’t enough. A once-in-a-while little fagola fling (even with his baby’s blessings) just wasn’t enough for F.R., so he just had to go and bust things up with his gorgeous honey, so stupid-ola. I say dumbo time ‘cause Fey actually is one of those rare creatures who is bisexual. So many folks say they are just to get more headlines (or cash). Why does Anne Heche come to mind right about now? Never mind, back to Fey.

So, Mr. R. had a regular dude on the side. F.R.’s gal knew all along—and she still tried to keep the relationship going okay between her and her man (what some women will put up with!). Didn’t work. Fey needed his tumescent nooky time too much.

But get this: As soon as Fey busted up with his gal, he also busted up with his guy. Didn’t want people thinking he was gay, or anything.

Oy vey. I think my straight girlfriends are correct: Men—and not just the hetero ones—are dumber than Tom Cruise in love.

34 comments:

Anonymous said...

I beg you EL NO TED C. I would take a hundred BI about celebrity lesbians shopping for office supplies than 1 Ted C BI.

Anonymous said...

come on, he's not that bad... it just seems that EVERY actor in hollywood is gay. Anyways, this has got to be Ryan Phillipe and Reese.

Anonymous said...

I guessed Prince because all of the "And it Ain'ts were mentioned in todays column. Prince was the only recently divorced celebrity mentioned in the column.

Anonymous said...

who the hell knows

Anonymous said...

Hey! I love Ted's BV!

Anonymous said...

I'd say Orlando Bloom

Anonymous said...

carmen electra and dave navarro

Anonymous said...

Who the fuck communicates in this fashion?
The guy writes like a 15 year old poseur; attempting to encompass every type of colloquialism from varying ethnicities.
Train wreck -- I beg of you cease these mindnumbing diatribes @ once!

Anonymous said...

or russell simmons and kimora

Anonymous said...

I'm trying to think of a divorced older (young boys), A-list Hollywood actor who is Jewish (oy vey clue).

Prince, Ryan and Orlando don't fit.

Anonymous said...

Fey Ray? Sure sounds a lot like Phillipe to me! I'm going with Reese & Ryan!

Anonymous said...

Ugg. There's a reason I stopped going to E's website.

Anonymous said...

Love you and the site, Ent, breath of fresh air and all that.

But pleasepleaseplease no more Ted!

He's a faux gossip, like Perez, who wants all the focus on himself with his poseur language and rehashed BIs (how many do you think he invents? 80%? Or are all his BIs about the same 2 closet cases?)

Ted and Perez want to BE the celebrities. Notice who all his items say more about him than their subject?

Run Lainey's BIs. They are so much better.

Anonymous said...

Hello All,

Hey This is someone's website and they can Post whoever and what ever they want. I f you don't like Ted skip that and read on-- I'll explain how to do that for some of the people who are not quite "adequite" intellectually.

1. You read the headline/title.
2. You notice it has Ted's name.
3. You remeber Ted refers to that guy from E online you hate to read.
4. You move on to the next article

I apologize for the lack of consideration I am showing by posting this, since it doesn't contain a guess to the BV's identity and no one should be subjected to people's random rants and raves, which by the way, I love Ted.


Signed,

Feeling intellectually superior in Kansas

Anonymous said...

(Posting anonymously due to my position in the entertainment world... I definitely shouldn't be posting anything on any site)

I do realize that Ted's lingo and Perez's attitude are a bit off-putting, but I will say this because I know this for a fact... Both of them have EXCELLENT sources and are very well connected. You can defnitely trust that the info you get from them is pretty darn accurate, unlike most blogs out there. Yes, I am reading EL's side on a daily basis - but only because I need to as part of my job, not because I believe that his info (ZX for example)is accurate or even factual.

Anonymous said...

I actually like the BV on this blog instead of Ted's actual one. Here, there are intelligent guesses and I love reading the commentary dialogue (which Ted doesn't give us).

Anonymous said...

Ted C. is a moron and a scumbag. Don't post any more of his BIs, EL plz.

Anonymous said...

love Ted C.leave him alone.

fo real said...

If you do add Ted C on Friday can you also add "And it Ain'ts"

Thanks :)

Anonymous said...

Ted is very very good at writing BI's that totally outfox people, who then bitch and gripe because they haven't the brain power to sit and think it through.

Rather than just saying the BI defeats you it's always easier to slag Ted off instead. Instead of admitting you are a dumbo.

He's still the best BI writer around. As the person above said, scroll instead of whining if you don't like it.

My guess: Ryan Phillipe. He has had bisexual gossip in the past a little. If it is him it is probably easier for his PR team to portray him as cheating with a billion women in Canada (uh, thanks Lainey) than linked to one man.

Anonymous said...

Run Lainey's BIs. They are so much better.

Don't run Lainey BIs please. Woman seems virtually on CAA's payroll.

Anonymous said...

This is TOM CRUISE, idiots!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
This is TOM CRUISE, idiots!

-no its not,learn to read.

Anonymous said...

The entire concept behind slagging the Ted tie ins is quite simply to dissuade future postings of this nature.
Presumably, in that there is a forum for comments, ENT would appreciate feedback on his postings & a lot of us would prefer not to see this Ted's attempt at witty banter be given an outlet outside of his own site. The shit ends up reading as inane senseless try hard rhetoric.
Can't fathom how anyone could be bothered attempting cruise this guy's verbal diarhea out of choice.

Anonymous said...

I just want to say that when I was a little girl growing up in Boston, I was introduced to blind items by Ted Casablanca and I still love him. I love his style and this saves me a trip to that awful site E!

So thank you and keep Ted.

With that said, the name Tom Cruise fits the code, but not all of the description. It's someone like Tom Cruise, Will Smith or Brad Pitt - not by description, but by name. Fey Ray is 1 syllable in each name. That's why Toothy Tile is not Jake Gyllenhaal, but man does he fit the description.

GGA

Anonymous said...

The same syllable thing doesn't always apply. Ted has debunked this in the past.
The "And it Ain't"s are Adam Brody, George Bush, James Blunt.
So, last name starts with B?
Still my guess is Eddie M.

Anonymous said...

Anon 10:35....You get to read this column as part of your job?!! Where do I get a job like that? LOL!

Anonymous said...

I'm going to guess Eddie Murphy.

I don't think Ryan P. has a particularly dazzling smile.

Anonymous said...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Jewish_actors_and_actresses

Here's a list of some jewish actors and actresses. I didn't find any that stood out who have split up lately. If you want to take the jewish route...Ellen Barkin and Ron Perelman (sp).

I have no clue, really, thought maybe someone could see something.

steelgrl

Anonymous said...

Ted uses yiddish expressions all the time. French words and expressions, too (just check out the title of the blind item). Those aren't hints.

Anonymous said...

Hey 10:35. Perez Hilton may have "excellent" sources but by the time it passes through his fat head and exits his revenge aimed ass, it's so distorted you can't trust it.

Anonymous said...

Toothy Tile is totally Jake Gyllenhaal. It is not about the syllables in all cases. Plus jake-gyll-en-hall and tooth-y-ti-le. 4 and 4.

Anonymous said...

Totally off topic, but how do you get two syllables out of Tile Anon 7:16?

Anonymous said...

^^ LOL. I wondered the same thing. Must be a yokel who pronounces it Tie-yul.

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