Saturday, November 10, 2012

Selena Gomez & Justin Bieber Break Up Again

As Justin Bieber's career slowly mashes into a Jonas Brother and fades away, Justin decided once and for all that Selena Gomez was cramping his style with the ladies and that it was time for him to move on to some of Lil Wayne and Jeremy Pivens' leftovers. Eventually he will settle for some Playmate who once had a spread and really hopes to have her own reality show. Then, after he moves to the casino touring, Justin will probably spend some time in rehab where he will meet a woman named Rhonduh who has dreams of being on a season of Rehab with Dr. Drew and they will end up married with some kids. The relationship will go sour, but Justin will be linked to her while he makes a comeback from the guest house at Usher's place.

Meanwhile, Selena Gomez was tired of getting cheated on; could see their careers were headed in opposite directions and wanted to date someone who knew how to pull his pants up.

46 comments:

KaySea said...

/yawn ... who cares

SusanB said...

I found out just now that if you giggle while you yawn it gives you a headache. Just disappear already!

bflogurl said...

The horrors! I am beside myself..

Nancy said...

She's much better off without him.

donner said...

See ya, Biebs...there's the door!

Sugar said...

They'll always remember their first lesbian realtionship.

Alma said...

I think they will both be replaced by new annoyances soon. If Selena Gomez plays her cards right she could have longevity but bieber has been overexposed.

Me said...

its interesting that all of you think he is going to fade away. i feel like he's a part of life now. like the morning traffic report and fog. hope you're right.

ButterKwup said...

Lol @ Sugar. I do not see the appeal at all. I work in a school and I know the girls love(d) him. Preteen girls like delicate features, but seriously.

Little Miss Smoke and Mirrors said...

Goodbye, Beiber, you smug, entitled, talentless little punk. It's been horrifying.

nolachickee said...

Rhonduh. That made me blow green tea out of my nose, Enty.

If Justin admitted that he was actually born a girl, it might buy him a few more minutes on the fame clock.

Christopher Cruz said...

I'm very sorry, but I hate them both sooooo much.

Arm70 said...

He needs to take the Kardashians with him and go jump in that pit the hobbit threw the ring in. Please god! Go away!

Cornbread said...

Did any of you see the pictures of Bieber from the VS fashion show? I only saw the ones posted on The Superficial, but they were hilarious. Also, they made me loathe Bieber even more than I thought I could.

I know nothing about Selena, but I do find her less irritating than Biebs. However, I do not see career longevity in either of their futures.

djphob said...

Maybe it's my Bachelorette hangover, but I am so over Biebs jokes. "lol he looks like a lesbian herp derp". Tired.

audrey said...

Think back to some of your crushes when you were 10-14. I bet they are questionable too. Just because we don't get his appeal doesn't mean shit. I still don't get all the hate or name calling. I also don't get why Enty seems to be obsessed with this couple. They are really still very young--kids in fact-- and well kids do stupid stuff all the time so to me there is nothing newsworthy about any of this.

urban chaos said...

RE: Beibs. Last year during our school fun fair I was running the prize table and a sticker company donated sheets and sheets (I mean a big box full) of Beiber stickers. We couldn't give those away to the elementary girls.
He's fading..

:| raven |: said...

this can't end soon enough.

i can't stand the little entitled snot-nosed brat, but when he threw up on stage ... REALLY??? you couldn't run off to the side of the stage or something? i mean who DOES that?

Sugar said...

I will stop with the jokes as soon as he starts looking like a dude. "Don't let the door hit you in the vagina on the way out"! - Selena.

Land Manatee said...

I'm a fan of people with natural talent. Whether you want to admit it or not, he is talented as proven by his early YouTube videos. Not many kids his age could sing or be self-taught on so many musical instruments as he was as a kid.

I think it's tough as a young person to grow up in the spotlight because all your stupid acts and comments are blasted to the 100th degree.

I think this kid has a lot of heart for his age. I read once how there are many unseen acts of kindness and unselfishness (same goes for Selena) he partakes in that many aren't aware of. He is at hospitals, giving to organizations and generous at his concerts.

I feel he is being managed by people with good intentions but regardless of their efforts to keep him "saintly" in the public eye, hormones are hormones and a dick is a dick. The brat-ish attitude that comes with it all at this point is just part of the whole pop-star, growing up with money and having all the attention experience. What were any of us doing at his age? For many of us, I'm sure nearly not as much.

It's not his fault he was born with "pretty" looks. Whether he fades out of existence or not, give him another 10 years and I think we will all be swooning over the handsome MAN he will become.

You would think I am a die-hard Bieber fan but I'm not. I just think compared to others his age, he gets a bad rap based on the one half we get to see of him.

:steps off podium and plugs in headphones:

djphob said...

@raven Lady Gaga, for one

Get a Life said...

Hope he doesn't end up like Leif Garrett.

auntliddy said...

Just try to imagine how little i/ we care. Wush selena well tho

JSierra said...

@Susan is that really true? Sure would explain a lot.

Would probably explain why I am also single because giggling whilst yawning is not a pretty look.

liteNOTSObrite said...

Every year my step daughter's elementary school has a father/daughter dance. Well, Mr Lite told me that a Beiber song came on and there was a collective groan and EVERYONE left the dance floor. Hopefully that's a sign that he is fading.

Patience Grasshopper said...

I work at an K-5 elementary school and I run the annual book fair. Posters are sold at the fair--cutsie puppies, kittens, sports stars, and the occasional teen idol. Last year I sold approximately 5 posters of the Beebs. This year, not a one. One Direction was the big seller.

Hazeldazel said...

@Get a Life - LOL! I was just scrolling down to write that Justin Beiber was the new Leif Garrett and you beat me to it.

Gawd I had the hots for Leif...

Oh well.

hollywood dime said...

an I the only one who doesn't 'get' Selena? she always looks like a toddler playing dress up on her moms fancy clothes. :/

Sherry said...

Sugar for the win!

The Black Cat said...

I like Selena, she is cute as a button and is good playing comedy or drama.

goheels83 said...

Good post @landmanatee.

Sherry said...

I think Selena is beuatiful but in a little girl way. Kind of like Sally Field. It will be interesting to see if she can do something serious that could afford her some H'wd hang time. Beebs, on the other hand will need to work twice as hard to continue beyond teen hearthrob status no matter how talented his is and I will admit he can sing. He should remember how others before him have gone and search for a better trajectory. That and start to behave a little more nicely in the public eye. People love to see assholes crash and burn.

Ingrid Superstar said...

They'll be photographed canoodling by Thanksgiving...by Christmas if their PR wants it to be epic...

Moonmaid said...

She always looks like she is hanging with her little brother when I see them together. It's like he has a crush on the babysitter.

Creepy.

Lola said...

I have to go with Manatee on this one.

Brooke said...

I thought enty would be happy. I always thought he must have a hard on for the boy - his hatred always reads like jealousy to me.

FrenchGirl said...

who cares! i probably broke 17 times with my first boyfriend in 6 months

FrenchGirl said...

i like him because he cares about his sick fans (apparently he's sensitive to the leukemia cause)
after i'm too old for his music and when i was teen,i loved rock

timebob said...

I hate that I like Selena now, she posted a photo on twitter without comment, of Justin some guy and a photo bomb of the Victoria Secret Model Barbara Plavin he was supposed to be cheating on Selena with in the back of them.

Busted.

Mango said...

@ Land Manatee - He has upwards of an $85 million dollar fortune. He should take his ass back to Canada and retire and consider himself pretty friggin' lucky, but no because he (and his handlers) can't conceive that there are people who don't want MORE BIEBS.


Sugar said...

My work here is done.

Anna said...

Enty, you skipped the part where Bieber gets involved with a younger Kardashian/Jenner girl to give the reality show one more storyline before it disappears.

If Selena wants to be involved with a guy who keeps his pants pulled up, then she needs to date men outside of Hollywood, and even outside of Hollywood it can be iffy to find one. Oh... you meant pants falling low literally, as in drooping. Nevermind.

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

I believe the Bieber hate is way too much. His music isn't any different than the other pop stars these days, but why people have always hated him so much is because little girls LOVE him.

Seriously, look at every group/singer that's been super-popular with 14-year-old girls. They're all punchlines in their time. Twilight, Duran Duran, NKOTB, David Cassidy, Leif Garrett. Were they the worst ever? No. Some are better than others, but the reason they're considered as such is because of the fanbase.

It's really unfair to the teen girls. They're just starting to grow up, first getting into music, movie stars, whatever, and the world immediately tells them "anything you love is the worst thing EVER."

I get that many here dislike Bieber for being a douche, and that's fine. But most people that make fun of him didn't know that side, they just saw a teen idol.

(I'm not a fan of his, BTW. I just think the hate of teen idols are another way to keep girls down.)

lilo723 said...

I just attended one of his concerts. I don't think 17,000 screaming fans means his career is fading. You have to give him credit. He can play every instrument on that stage, not to mention sing and dance. He is also very charming. I am a huge fan of his talent and think he has staying power. I would rather seem him be big than Chris Brown, who thinks it's ok to hit girls.

cc taylor said...

I completely agree with you Manatee

Dee Lurker said...

Great post Manatee though I sincerely dislike both of them. She creeps me out-too little girl "sexy" for me.