Crazy Days and Nights

Celebrity Adoptions Gone Bad ( REALLY, REALLY BAD)

Lately it seems everyone wants to adopt a baby, buy a baby or whatever else celebs are doing to get a baby in 30 minutes or less..But if you recall this is kind of the 2nd wave of adoptions..The first happened a few years ago when Rosie and Jodie Foster and Camryn Mannheim and Calista Flockhart all adopted children or gave birth without identifying the father (Thanks anonymous). It was during that period of time that I had a celebrity couple (unmarried/ (she) actress (he) producer (both) A list to B list) come to me because they wanted some attention/help a disadvantaged child...Anyway, they actually did not want to adopt a child (18 months or so)..They had a brighter idea than that. Actress' sister was in jail at the time and would be for quite some time..Actress' sister did not know who the father was and Actress's mom was tired of taking care of the baby so our couple who we will call A&P decided they could become guardians of the child, get on the adoption bandwagon so to speak and help out mom and sister at the same time. I actually like to believe their initial intentions were good although misguided but had not realized what a child does to someone's life even if several nannies are on the payroll...

So the paperwork was filled out and they were given temporary guardianship until a court investigator could look at the living environment and home and report back to the court before a permanent guardianship could be granted..Well this is where the problems started..The investigator wanted to meet with A&P together at the house and just see how they interacted with the child but short of that would be willing to interview A&P separately if need be..The following quotes were said to me over the next few months while appointments were scheduled and canceled in vain..

"But we're celebrities, there must be an exception for us."
"We have to let him in our home?"
"Why do we have to be here?"
"Do we tip him?"
"I am having a little procedure that week so I can't."
"Fashion week comes first."
"Maybe we should just try and get her out of jail."
"Do we have to change diapers or is there going to be a test?"

Finally after 4 months of scheduling and rescheduling they connect with the investigator and actually to their credit everything goes fine and shortly thereafter they become guardians of the child..Now, there is really nothing left for them or for me to do for a year when they have an annual review to make sure everything is going well, etc..Now my name is on the court papers as the attorney of record so if something happens in regards to the matter, the court lets me know..well after about six months I get copies of all this paperwork done by 4 different families who all want to be guardians of this child..wtf? So, I call up A&P and ask what is going on..

"Well every party/opening/interview, etc..we kept telling everyone about how we now had this baby and everyone was so envious/proud/wish they had thought of it that they all wanted to try and do the same thing.."

"After a few months we stopped getting attention and the baby was causing headaches in our filming schedules/vacations/parties/yoga lessons and so when we saw someone who asked about "B" we said well actually we are thinking of sending her back to B's grandma."

Well it turns out that if the other couple showed interest, they would pawn off the child to the couple for a weekend or a week along with a complimentary nanny so they could decide if they wanted B. Well they were so successful at pawning B off on everyone and promising all these couples they could be guardians and one couple went and got an attorney and drew up papers and became the temporary guardian of B and when the other couples found out, they all went ballistic and filed all their papers through their attorneys saying they were promised B and they wanted B for themselves/and to get attention..

A&P loved the drama and since the other couples wanted A&P on their side for any testimony, they were wining and dining them/giving gifts/talking about greenlighting moives/new production deals/office space and A&P were LOVING it..this was much better than actually having to take care of B..after B's case was done they were "seriously thinking of helping another child."

Well one of the effects of all this paperwork is that B's mom got coipes of all the documents and saw what was going on and got her own attorney and talked to A's mom and once the judge in the case saw what was going on, managed to take care of it by making A's mom guardian until B's mom got out of jail which was about 9 months later...

Meanwhile, the other couples turned on A&P and although they are probably considered B listers because of their past work, their work will remain primarily in the past because these couples were not the ones you ever want to piss off..P has not done anything and A is "taking a break for the most part."

Now, if you think this one was bad I have one that is in some ways even worse, but do not know if I will share it tomorrow or wait for some other time..I like to give you loyal readers variety..

Thanks for the comments and e-mails and links and I really appreciate them all..I try to answer all the comments here on my blog and also on yours if you have one..I hope you will keep spreading the stories that make up my crazy days and crazy nights..