Friday, October 16, 2009

Lindsay Lohan's Third Strike But It Won't Matter


After a very long absence from her alcohol class, Lindsay showed up last night. The reason? Well she has been ordered back into court today because she has been skipping class and that doesn't even count the boozing and prescription drugs and coke and burglaries and goodness, how come she isn't in jail again?

Since January, Lindsay has violated the rules of her substance program at least twice. This will be the third time but it won't matter. This is Lindsay and she has the best defense lawyer in town. She is like the Pete Doherty of America except Pete doesn't steal does he? He does the bisexual thing like Lindsay, but he doesn't steal. Plus he is a singer. Oh, what the hell it is close enough.

It is remarkable though how a few months of absence is suddenly corrected when the judge says they want to see you the next day. Do you think Lindsay would have gone to school last night if the judge hadn't ordered her to court? Hell no. Lindsay would have blown off alcohol class for alcohol drinking.

34 comments:

shazzzba said...

THIS IS REALLY SAD...BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING IT WON'T END TILL SHE'S FOUND DEAD IN A POOL OF HER OWN VOMIT...

Elle Kaye said...

Fuck Los Angeles

canadachick said...

Well we all know how the lohans feel about school (right ALI ??).

Shame as this judge could have the chance to save her by ordering to a real rehab this time, not a hey your a celebrity and we'd love to take your money while you have inappropriate sex in the bath room with some guy kind of rehab.

devildana said...

Shazzzba:
I hope that she if found in a pool of someone else's vomit.

linnea said...

I watched Parent trap the other day. Wow.

McDooks said...

Not even the law will give this skank the bitch slap she needs.

What a joke.

Now if *I* were to blow off my booze skool....I sure as shit wouldn't be on the computer right now. I'd be trying to fend off Bertha.

Syko said...

Best rehabs in the world are not going to work until you want to be rehabilitated. Apparently Lindsay's rock bottom is much lower than most people. For the majority of us, looking like a cadaver with frown lines at the age of 23 and being all but unemployable would be enough.

canadachick said...

update from TMZ :
1:13 PM ET -- The judge said she is "rooting for [Lindsay] to successfully complete her terms of probation."

1:11 PM ET -- The judge has agreed to extend Lindsay's probation.

1:10 PM ET -- The DA says if the court has to jump through hoops for Lindsay again, they want her to see jail time.

1:09 PM ET -- Lindsay's lawyer wants the judge to extend her probation a year so she can complete the program.


1:08 PM ET -- Chapman Holley says Lindsay is moving to Texas and is asking for a leave of absence from the program.

1:07 PM ET -- Her lawyer says Lindsay has completed 15 of 26 alcohol classes and 13 of 28 self help sessions.

---------------
moving to TEXAS WTF

Syko said...

Extend her probation so she can have time to complete the program?

People who have actual jobs and responsibilities at home manage to complete the programs. What exactly is she doing that precludes her attending the classes? Damn wimpy judge. She should have done time long before this.

Carrie L. said...

Texas, huh? Is she going to work at a local whore house or something? What a joke; yet another person who turns and looks the other way. Why isn't drug & alcohol testing a part of her probation?

Get a Life said...

Lindsay is Mackenzie Philip 2.0. I feel really bad for this girl. She really needs some good role models around her and apparently has no one. It really is tragic.

NotSoAnonMom said...

Moving to Texas???!!! Random!

.robert said...

Drug & alcohol testing done by the probation officers is a huge joke. I have a nephew that would take E, roxies, pot and drink on the weekend and come Tuesday pass every time. We were all hoping he would get nailed and spend a bit of time locked up but nope, never caught once.

Elle Kaye said...

The judge is "rooting" for her? How about be a judge and do your job. Make her accountable for being a fucking asshole. Pussy.

selenakyle said...

Yeah...Texas???

Maybe she's joining the FLDS, and gonna wear prairie dresses and big braids and be meek and get fucked by a bunch of sick, gross old men.


*wow, sorry...that was mean!*

caydian said...

Let her come. Texas won't put up with her ****. Might be the best thing for her.

Isabel said...

Caydian is right. Tell her to bring her ass to Texas and try her antics out. She'll be under the jail so fast her bobble head will spin.

Nikki said...

this really, really pisses me off. i wanted to see her do time. i think that may be the only thing that will save her at this point.

in 2007 one of my best guy friends got his 2nd DUI (he had his first as a senior in high school).

he got completely screwed - thousands and thousands of $$$ in fines, lawyer fees, court fees and the worst part....he spent the entire summer of 2008 IN JAIL! 4 months of JAIL!

now that he has finally beat his drinking problem and is looking for jobs - do you think anyone is at all interested?! NO that's a big no.

and this stupid bitch gets all the chances in the world and still gets these BS hosting jobs where she rakes in hundreds of thousands of dollars.

I HATE HER

Sylvia said...

I live right next to the border (Mexico), so I will give her a pass to go party to Nuevo Laredo. See if she comes out of there ALIVE.

Meg C.H. said...

She is a moron. Good luck in Texas, Lindsey.

amanda rae said...

Haha, Texas. Does she know that Texas will NOT put up with her shit? She couldn't have picked a more no-bullshit state if she tried! I feel kinda bad for her though, simply because I know what it's like to deal with substance abuse (I absolutely loathe alcohol though and do not understand what people like about it), but the difference between me and her is that I have a wonderful family who taught me right from wrong, and gave me a great foundation of morals and support that I could fall back on when I had my problems. Lindsay has never had that, and being in Hollywood with all the exploitation and abuse that happens to children could not have helped the situation.

I remember reading that someone thought she had to be molested because her behavior is typical of molestation victims...whoever said that I think is spot on in their assessment. I feel like someone needs to help this poor thing, but she also needs to help herself. It's a tough call, and for some reason I kinda like her so I wish she'd get her shit together and get some help. Hell, I wish I could help her! She should move to Florida, I'll be her friend (because I don't have anything to steal, LOL). I just don't want to see her dead when it can be prevented.

Sorry for any mistakes or weird sentences, it's hard to type with a sick Boxer laying on your arms!

sunnyside1213 said...

I bet you all a cheeseburger she is not moving to Texas.

chihuahuense said...

What I don't get is when someone talks about how low she has fallen, they always say "she was SOO talented." Really? Hm, I must've missed that. Couple of crappy performances surrounded by much better actors, and a shitty album, I think? That is SOOO talented. Jeez, I have stage-fright and I think I could be SOOO talented if those are the qualifications.

RocketQueen said...

Come now, people. There are not nearly enough paparazzi in Texas. California is where it's at for this girl!

Elle Kaye said...

When everyone calls Dina Lohan "Orange Oprah", what is the "Oprah" reference?

Anonymous said...

This picture of Lindsay is weird. Did she get something done? Weird cheeks and lips. Weird.

Nikki said...

@ elle kaye - dina lohan referred to herself as 'white oprah' in an interview where she said all her daughter's friends ask her for advice

i dont know anybody that would want advice from an idiot that calls themselves white oprah....

ardleigh said...

I say they dry her out in a prison infirmary. I am tired of the whole family and their BS attitude.

Kimberly said...

Let's look at this objectively:

1) Texas is as no bullshit as it gets;

2) Texas has parts that are homophobic (not everyone and not everywhere, before someone attacks me);

3) Texas believes in REAL law and order (none of this innocent until proven guilty mentality);

4) Texas is not going to allow tons of paparazzi to run around creating dangerous situations for Texans; and

5) Texas is an NRA state as its best/worst: if she even thought about robbing someone's home (or having a friend do it), she'd be bullet ridden before she could say her name.

Maybe moving to Texas *IS* the best thing for her...

On a more serious note, she's dying right before our eyes. If/when it finally happens, I want to media to rip her parents a new asshole for their complicity in her demise.

Kat said...

"On a more serious note, she's dying right before our eyes. If/when it finally happens, I want to media to rip her parents a new asshole for their complicity in her demise."

EXACTLY.

Those useless assholes who label themselves as her "parents"...even her death will not be enough for them to 1) stop pimping out their surviving kids 2) realize that her death is at least 50% their fault.

She should be in jail tonight, but it would seem that the Los Angeles court system is a fucking joke.

Lana's Blog said...

Sounds like the judge was starstruck. Dumbass.

lifeaccordingtoflwrgurl said...

ya'll she is going to Texas to finish the movie for machete directed by Robert Rodriguez she's not going to live there long term!

Wil said...

The rest of us would be meeting our new fun roommates with interesting sexual fantasies they would like to share with us! This broad .. runs free.

I also agree eventually Linds will be the next Dana Plato and be found dead of drug, alcohol or both.

captivagrl said...

where are the random drug screens?