Friday, October 15, 2010

Ted C Blind Item

Well, screw us with no lube, Judas Jack-Off sure has gotten more ballsy, lately! And we mean that in many dirty ways, trust.

Now, last time we checked in on poor ol' closeted Judas, he was pathetically trying to cultivate a domestic-front for the media, engaging in various exciting pastimes with his ersatz honey.

Didn't work.

In fact, Judas and his woman's shared-outing thing so colossally misfired (and Judas never got the desired press he really wanted from it), Judas has now taken to the exceptionally seedy activity of....

Cheating on his fake (female) significant other!

And not with the poor, put-upon, on/off boyfriend, Dash Dingle-Dream he usually cheats with, but, with...other women!

Frequent visitors to the place Judas and Dash most often occupy complain of seeing Judas "always" hauling in some random chick to his bedroom. "Looks pretty obvious to me what's going on," snipped a babe who's been over to the boys' hang-pad recently. "I mean, come on."

This is just beyond gross. It's bad enough Judas has tortured Dash enough with the People-mag arranged chick in his life, but, now he's got to tag on one-night stands—just in case the press finds out the real deal, that he prefers guys?

Sorry, but, this one's getting beyond anything even Shafterella Shoshstein would ever dream up for the rags! And that's saying something.

Get help, Jude. And fast. You are not well.

It Ain't: Tom Sturridge, Taylor Lautner, Vince Vaughn

16 comments:

RocketQueen said...

This is thought to be Hayden Christensen, right?

Jamie's Girl said...

Jonas Doofus?

Lioness70 said...

I can't keep track of Ted's closeted blinds. Different silly name, almost the same situation. Yawn.

Cheryl said...

Yeah, the girls at Blind Items Exposed keep track of Ted's who's who so if you really care check it out.

looserdude said...

Thanks Cheryl!

timebob said...

Does anybody speak Ted C? and translate this mess. kthx

timebob said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sunnyside1213 said...

I thought it was Hayden, but lots of people think this is Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ekles. Also, Hayden and Bilson have been over for awhile.

generation veXed said...

Joe Jonas maybe

ellie said...

Ted's Blinds = Waste of Space!

Mooshki said...

Maybe the guy is bisexual?

Ella said...

Previously notted for this one are:
Chris Evans, Chris Pine, Jake Gyllenhaal, Joe Jonas, Lance Armstrong, Matthew McConaughey, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Kitsch

RJ said...

I agree with Mooshki. The guy is clearly a bi-sexual. Ted C. barely refuses to admit that straight people exist, but he really can't handle the thought that someone could be sexually attracted to both men and women. I'm beginning to think that he's sounding like someone who doth protest too much. Maybe he's had the occasional hetero fling?! Wouldn't that be some awesome gossip?? Kind of like those gay-bashing Republican politicians who keep getting caught with young men!!

sunnyside1213 said...

Ted has said he tried the vjayjay route in high school. But it is tedious that he thinks everyone is gay. Dream on Ted.

Bubbles said...

I don't think Ted has a problem accepting that people are straight or bisexual. It's just that a truly bi-sexual guy traditionally cheats on his girlfriend with guys, not the other way around. And if he's that into women, why does he need a beard in the first place? He would be able to find his own real girlfriend if that's what he wanted.

Tenley said...

Hayden Christensen immediately came to mind, just because of the name Judas (Christ...ensen). But I have to say it seems to fit beyond just that.