Friday, March 15, 2013

NY Times Says Matt Lauer Will Be Replaced

You know what sounds cool, but has no basis in reality? Last week I wrote that Matt Lauer was going to be dumped by the end of May sweeps if the ratings did not improve. One of my sources was not in the meeting, but her boss was and the boss kind of wants to sleep with his employee so has been telling her everything. Anyway, then this week The NY Times ran essentially the same story and it sounds like they were in the same meeting. I think the boss is leaking stuff to the Times. I get the employee he wants to have sex with and the Times gets the actual guy, because he again feels like a big shot. Oh, going back to the sounds cool part? It could have just been the NY Times saw my excellent reporting and decided to followup. Corroborate stuff or whatever it is they do there other than lay off people and hemorrhage money. Now all the tabloids have followed The Times' lead. Oh, if you are worried about my source and me burning her, no worries. She said it was fine and that her boss would be the one to get fired and she hates being pawed at by him anyway so would be willing to quit.

40 comments:

Henriette said...

Blind Gossip had this one.

VIPblonde said...

Good riddance!

MISCH said...

He's overdue

Henriette said...

I guess we'll know where Matt Lauer is now---the unemployment line!

Christopher Cruz said...

I still can't believe he turned out to be such an asshole.

Cleodacat said...

One minute Matt Lauer was just there, then the shirt came off and it was "whoa", and has since developed into a real tool. Bye-bye. (Liam, paying any attention?)

ethorne said...

He looks so glib in that picture. Asshole.

libby said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Henriette said...

@Christopher Cruz
I don't know why. Lauer is best friends with Bryant Gumball, the original daytime asshole. Birds of a feather flock together, especially arrogant entitled ones. Lauer thought he was as special as Gumball, and he was wrong!

libby said...

Bad news for Lauer=Good news for tv.

Good news for tv=Good news for AMERICA.

Therefor,

Bad news for Lauer = REJOICE, every one!!! Light the lamps, hang the bunting, 'cause Happy Days are Here Again.


...And I think I just used algebra for the first time without any numbers.

FrenchGirl said...

Lauer may go to Jeopardy
http://www.nypost.com/p/entertainment/tv/jeopardy_looking_at_lauer_as_next_XuTx94RwSSe3I4tM74WMtO

dee123 said...

Good. Hope he goes.

Off topic the Veronica Mars Kickstarter is almost up to 3.29 million.

LottaColada said...

@ethorne- lol maybe they can give his spot to Tom Cruise

Meanie Reese said...

Buh-bye!!!

bri swartley said...

I find it shocking that people actually still watch all these network talky things. The dumbed down pablum is pitiful. Lauer has been sleeping with every host, asst, make up chick, etc, that would let him, forever. He gives dogs a bad name. Good riddance, but a small start.

Robert said...

Glad to read this. I've thought Lauer's a douche ever since I read how he insists on females he works with having sex with him. Not that I care if he has sex with co-workers, but a guy who'd use that as leverage over someone's job is a total douche.

Amber said...

LOL Enty is feisty today. Love.

Robert said...

Bring back Captain Kangaroo! (Even in reruns!)

Susan said...

Tell me more about Bryant Gumball.

Dena said...

Well written...I like it!

libby said...

Susan, I was at the Today show, Bryant's final week....and I'll say in daylight, the amount of caked-on makeup they all wear is CRAZY.

I wish I had better info. But Bryant shook my hand, and his head, face & neck were all covered in peachy-brown GREASE! It was all I could do not to wipe it.

Maybe they have better makeup now. Lauer probably insisted. 'Cause it was startling IRL.

portlandjewel said...

X= Matt Lauer is an ass:)

portlandjewel said...

I think they use that spray on makeup now. Created for HD. But yah, they sure look better ON tv!

FrenchGirl said...

@Henriette: Blind Gossip wrote this blind from the NY times article

Jacq said...

Is this a blind about Lauer or Enty's friend?

HannahBanana said...

YaaaaaaaaYessssssss!!! Bout damn time! Ho's due date passed a loooong time ago.

Agent**It said...

No way will he get the Jeopardy job when it is the viewers that are the ones dictating the network to fire him from the Today show. The Merv Griffin machine rolls on non controversial choices. Consumers can rule !!

Alicia said...

Where In The World Will Matt Lauer Go?

libby said...

Agent---watch Seacrest leave AI, and take that Jeopardy job.
The ghost of being Griffin's bottom boy CAN come full circle, eh?

Seachica said...

If Lauer gets the Jeopardy job, I sadly will quit Jeopardy. And I am a daily viewer.

Anderson Cooper for Jeopardy host! He would be perfect.

ino said...

It's about time.

Jennifer H. said...

LMAO! They ought to send him out on one of those trips, to the hinterlands of Pakistan or China, and leave his ass there.

Jennifer H. said...

They could send the show out on location sometimes so he can still work in a hurricane every now and then.

lazyday603 said...

Good for Matt Lauer. Morning shows are the worst high profile job in show business. Now he can go enjoy all the money he's made over the years without having to wake up at 2:00 AM 5 days a week.

DewieTheBear said...

[laughs, somehow I posted this over in the K-Stew thread, d'oh!]

I have eagerly awaited this day. How the twit from "HBO News" in the eighties managed to re-fashion himself as some sort of arbiter of "real news" has always been a mystery. His accompanying climb up the Douche Ladder with the way he's treated women like little more than blow-up dolls there to service him and let him handle the "serious news stories" - as if this guy didn't come out of, I can't say it enough, freakin' HBO News - has been flabbergasting.

Enjoy the fall to the bottom, Matty. It's been a long time coming.

CrazyCatLady said...

Thats awesome about Veronica Mars!

figgy said...

We also watch Jeopardy almost every day, but wouldn't if this twit was on it. Yuck.

Sherry said...

Oh thank goodness Agent**it. But honestly Alex is a bit of a tool too. Doesn't matter to me though. I still lure Jeopardy.

And where is Gumbel today? Languishing in obscurity?

Mooshki said...

Jeez, Enty, give it up already. Thanks to Kympossible, we now know that you make up everything you write on the site.

(That was sarcasm, in case anyone didn't catch it.)

Jeri said...

just a little fyi - Many years ago The Enquirer ran a story about male celebs that dyed their hair. Matt was listed among them. He immediately shaved his head (this was before everyone was doing it) and has kept it short since then.