Blind Items Revealed #3
May 21, 2015
It’s hard to believe this actor once got married. It is not hard to believe it didn’t last long. If you talk to this mostly television actor who has a really unusual side job when he isn’t acting he will be nice. If you are female, he will be nice and then he will keep being nice until you have sex with him and then he will never speak to you again. Yes, even if you get pregnant he won’t speak to you. No sorry if you have a miscarriage. On the outside this B list comic actor seems great. He isn’t. He isn’t evil as in he won’t kill you or rape you. He will however do everything in his power to screw you over. If you are female. He is friends with guys and likes guys. He hates women. He destroys women. If he could destroy every woman on the planet, he would. After they have sex with him first.
Fred Armisen
32 comments:
I find that HARD to believe he is co-workers and close friends with Carrie Brownstein---she would drop him so fast.
While Fred Armisen is undeniably a creep, he does not set to destroy women. He just takes advantage of his celebrity status and dates/lays as many as he can without attachment.
what Elisabeth Moss has said about him since their divorce now makes soooooo much sense...
Dang, whoever wrote this really hates Fred Armisen. It's so OTT that it's comical.
Well he's NOT having sex with Carrie though, now is he? Curious as to exactly what went down in his short-lived marriage with Elizabeth Moss......
I think that the reason the BI comes out as so over the top is that it's stories from a large group of different people rammed into one item. Check out this Gawker post from 1/8/15: http://gawker.com/fred-armisen-has-a-reputation-1677187580
As for the Carrie Brownstein part, she's said herself that she can be cold and emotionally distant in relationships. I've heard a few stories about her too, but not as blatant as the stories about Fred.
I think I know who but his name is not memorable enough. He is second rate but that helps him trick women into thinking he really likes them. I once saw a women -- who must fit the bill -- crying at a dinner party. He clearly looked guilty but pretended like nothing was happening. She started texting and glaring and cried some more. It was really awkward, but I guess this happens a lot around this guy.
Ha, sounds like the guys I avoided in high school. Is this a really young actor?
tru, but I heard he particularly likes to trap women first, then sleep with them -- or maybe he doesn't sleep with them -- maybe it's often something more demeaning (well, I wouldn't call it demeaning except that he's a jerk after). Yeah, then he's a jerk but he won't let them leave
well, he's certainly no Agent Cooper (*swoon*). More like Leland/Bob :-)
Wow. That really sounds like Bob! But he's just a character in a movie?
Oh, but Laura, aren't we all just actors in a movie?
Carrie's a lesbian - this only applies to straight women.
Odd, I know, but "bros before hos" is strangely applicable. If you haven't been affected by a close friend's Jekyll/Hyde behavior, much less one who's a business partner, you go with your own experience of them.
Yeah, he even admitted to being horrible to her, and she had it really bad.
what did she say?
Sounds like he stuck in 'Bros before Hos' mode with his buddies.
Grow up.
Fred has specific relationship attraction.. in that it's not typical, ordinary type of female he will marry.
Armisen was born on December 4, 1966, in Hattiesburg, Mississippi, and moved to Manhattan, New York City, as a baby. He was raised in Valley Stream, New York, on Long Island, where he was a high school classmate of fellow SNL alumnus Jim Breuer. His mother, Hildegardt Mirabal, a schoolteacher, is from Venezuela. His father, Fereydun (later "Fred") Armisen, who worked for IBM, was born in Germany, to a Japanese father and a German mother, Armisen attended the School of Visual Arts (NYC) before dropping out to begin a career as a rock drummer. He has mentioned watching the bands The Clash and Devo perform on television, and wanting to be a performer since he was a child.
Born in Leeds, England, in 1959, Timms recorded her first solo album, Hangahar (an experimental improvised film score), at the age of 19 with Pete Shelley of the Buzzcocks in 1980. Prior to joining The Mekons in 1986 she was in a band called the She Hees. She has released several other solo albums, Someone's Rocking My Dreamboat in 1988, To the Land of Milk and Honey in 1995, and a country album, Cowboy Sally's Twilight Laments for Lost Buckaroos, for Bloodshot Records in 1998. Her latest solo recording In the World of Him was released in 2004 on Touch and Go Records.
Timms sang "Give me Back my Dreams" on The Sixths' Hyacinths and Thistles and has recorded with Marc Almond, The Aluminum Group, Jon Rauhouse's Steel Guitar Show, the Sadies, Andre Williams and A Grape Dope. She participated in Vito Acconci's Theater Project for a Rock Band as part of the Brooklyn Academy of Music's Next Wave Festival in 1995 and also performed with Kathy Acker in her lesbian pirate operetta Pussy, King of the Pirates at the Museum of Contemporary Art in Chicago and elsewhere. Timms sang several songs on The Executioner's Last Songs CDs, which raised funds for the Illinois Moratorium Against the Death Penalty, and participated in Jon Langford's multi-media performance project The Executioner's Last Songs. She occasionally writes crude broadsheets on pop culture and recently directed a Christmas pirate panto Catfish Girl and her adventures amongst mermaids and pyrates at the Hideout Bar in Chicago.
Her musical style is often placed under the genre of alternative country.
She was married to musician and comedian Fred Armisen from 1998 to 2004.[16][17]
After meeting Fred Armisen in October 2008, Elizabeth Moss and he became engaged, in January 2009.[20] They wed on October 25, 2009, in Long Island City, New York. Moss and Armisen separated in June 2010, and in September, Moss filed for divorce, which was finalized on May 13, 2011.
Moss is a Scientologist... so we have;
Armisen was married to English singer and songwriter Sally Timms from 1998 to 2004 and to actress Elisabeth Moss from 2009 to 2011.
From August 2010 to September 2011, Armisen dated fellow Saturday Night Live cast member Abby Elliott.
Armisen, a resident of Portland, Oregon's Pearl District, said on Real Time with Bill Maher that he is an atheist. Woo hoo.. talk about hard to please, hard to find him that perfect match mate.
Hmmmm, this reminds me of the politician who hated gay people, wanted to destroy their lives, and publicly shamed them.....while he secretly had bathroom encounters with men.
Maybe Fred secretly wants to be a woman?
Elisabeth Moss said he does a lot of great impressions, but that his best one was that of a normal human being....
Fred Armisen is my hero now and forever.
Fuck them over good, Fred.
Std's and all.
Is that why Abby Elliott's career has gone nowhere?
How does he get anyone to sleep with him? That is the salient question.
+1
tricks and lies and more tricks, I gather
He's 48 years old...sad, right?
He calmly sits at the end of the bar and licks his eyebrows.
This just sounds like such an incredibly biased slant on things. That's why it's hard to believe. Did Elizabeth Moss write it?
Unfortunately, I can confirm this is true. The person who wrote it is obviously a bit melodramatic, but he's a misogynistic a-hole. A friend of mine waitresses at a big celebrity hotspot down in NYC and apparently he hit on her while he was married and got VERY angry when she turned him down (she's married). She said he went 0-60 in like a second. Scary.
Tell me more about your mother, Fred. Our session is almost up.
I heard he likes to dress in women's clothes. Wasn't sure how serious that was though. Maybe just for fun -- but could be a way of life?
Exactly so.
I can see this but what's up with his friendship with Carrie Brownstein? Does she get a pass because she's gay? I can't imagine she puts up with that.
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