Flavor Flav Pleads Guilty To Battery

Flavor Flav faced 12 years in jail for threatening the 17 year old son of Flav's now ex-girlfriend with a butcher knife. That sounds like one hell of a party. I'm guessing the kid must have messed around with one of Flav's clocks. Seriously, who just pulls out a butcher knife for an argument with a teenager? The felony assault charges that Flav faced were reduced in his plea to misdemeanor battery. Instead of the 12 years in jail he faced if he went to trial, now all Flav has to do is take four months of domestic violence counseling and got put on probation. The incident, which happened back in 2012 involved Flavor pushing his girlfriend to the floor and then chasing the teen with the butcher knife. This was about a week after his girlfriend overdosed while filming Couples Therapy.

Lets Talk Flavor Flav

First of all I can't believe how many women throw themselves at Flavor Flav and how they all seem to want to marry the guy. They do though. The problem is that when he gets to using is that he is not a very nice person at all. His latest girlfriend figured that out when he pulled a knife on her and her teenage son after a huge middle of the night argument. The girlfriend called the police and Flavor went to jail for a few hours and charged with felony domestic violence. The sad thing is that the girlfriend probably won't leave him and just say it was because he was drunk or using or something and forgives him. If someone pulls a knife on you, then you need to run. Run quickly and never return. Flavor is due in court today.

Flavor Flav Spent $6M On Drugs - Lost Virginity At 6

Yes, that headline is correct and I know the first question you are all asking yourself is not how is Flav alive after spending that much money on drugs, but how exactly does Flav manage to have enough disposable income to spend $6M on drugs? Flav has a new book out and during his press tour says that for a six year period he spent $2600 a day everyday for six years on drugs. That works out to almost $6M. I can't believe he never had a day where someone bought him drugs? No birthday specials? If you were Flav's dealer, you really had no need to ever sell to anyone else or take any chances on getting arrested. Focus on customer service. I would have lived next door to Flav to make sure he never went looking for another dealer.

Flav also discusses how he lost his virginity at 6. How the hell do you even know what sex is when you are six. In case you think it was molestation or something, it was not, it was another 6 year old girl. Seriously?

Did you know Flav has three grandchildren? His oldest child is 25 and the youngest is 4. I hope it is the 25 year old who has kids.

Flavor Flav Opens A Fried Chicken Place

It is not really that surprising that Flavor Flav opened a restaurant. I mean lots of celebrities think they can make money at a place and of course they want to be able to eat for free, especially when they are visiting Clinton, Iowa. Yes, for some reason, Flavor opened his brand new restaurant in Clinton, Iowa. Also probably going against all good advice he opened it right next door to a KFC.

Nothing against Clinton, Iowa, but it just does not exactly seem like the place Flavor Flav probably envisioned when he was thinking of opening a place. One thing is for sure though, I bet he wears the most clocks out of anyone in the town. As for the food, Flavor says it will knock your taste buds out of the house. So, if you are ever in Clinton, Iowa, stop by Flav's place.

Sex On A Box

Have you ever had sex while standing on a wooden crate or box? How about when you were six years old? Well, Flavor Flav says he did just that. I'm not sure if Flav is having crack flashbacks or if this just explains a great deal about who he is. In an interview with Complex magazine, Flav said:

"A girl and me were having sex on a box in some big tall bushes. This was when I was real, real, real, real, young. I'm going to tell you the truth - I was six years old."

Now, lets see. Flav is 49 so when he was six that was about, what? 1965. You don't really hear about six year old kids losing their virginity in 1965. Actually you don't hear about it too much today either, and why was the sex on a box? He makes it sound as if they were standing up. Or maybe she was like 20 or something and he was standing on a box because she was standing on the ground. How the hell do two people stand on a box and have sex? Normally I would be thinking about this all day, but because then Flav would pop in my head, I'm going to go ahead, and just try and put this out of my mind as quickly as possible.

Six? I didn't even know there were girls at six. I just thought they were kids who played with different dolls. Six? What is that? First grade? "What did you do at school today son? "Not much. We learned how to add numbers without using our fingers. Oh, and I went ahead and did that hot kindergarten chick out by the bushes at recess."

Random Photos Part Two

There really should be a law about letting Carrot Top out in public.
Speaking of tops and public. How many times do you think Chyna flashed everyone that night? If you guessed four then you are the big winner.
"Yea Scott, I'm not going to be #4,865 on your sex parade."
"You know Beyonce, Jay-Z isn't here and my dad used to be on Growing Pains. What say we get out of here?"
Do you have to pay extra so the nipples are always hard?
Just enjoy the photo ladies and don't think about who it is or what he has done.

I don't even want to know what goes on in their house. Well, I actually do but I don't want it sanitized by VH-1. Does Hustler have a television channel?
You know the thing is they really like each other.
Not Debra's best look.
That saying no forever to X Files kind of becomes a maybe and then a yes when the rest of the career goes down the toilet. Those diva principles just kind of get pushed to the side.
Well at least Laura San Giacomo can say she used to be a sex symbol.

Hey at least we can say Lindsay isn't stick thin because she is bigger than the stick. I think all celebrities should have to stand behind this post..
Keith Richards' makeup is a little overdone.
Do you ever get the feeling that maybe Julia Roberts can just go off on you if she wanted.
Jack has been on vacation as long as Naomi Watts has been pregnant.

Random Photos Part One

I just feel uglier by the second when I look at Alexa Havins and Justin Bruening.
Jessica Canseco got married over the weekend. I'm guessing there was a Bachelorette party.

"So there I was Brett. I had Ashlee's ass right in my hand and I started squeezing."
You don't need to tease me Geri. I already said I would go ahead and be the father of your child.
The good thing about being Flavor Flav is that you can put on anything at anytime and it all looks perfectly normal.
I wonder if Christian takes the Batman suit home and then his wife plays Batgirl.
Dead man walking. Tick tock.

You think Kimora would have let Russell out of the house in those pants. I guess Porschla doesn't care.
Feed The Children and Feed The Super Model join forces to get Petra Nemcova to eat.
John Turturro is berry berry sneaky.
Heath Ledger is now Amish.