Random Photos Part One

Three parts today.

Orlando Bloom is tired of technology and has gone old school. The problem he is having is finding a phone jack in each building he can use.
Nicole Scherzinger goes makeup free for Twitter.
Brangelina at the Producer's Guild Awards over the weekend.
Rosie Huntington Whiteley in Brazil.
So...Selma Blair's shirt means? She prefers feet groping her rather than hands? She prefers socks to bras?
Stephen Colbert and Herman Cain in South Carolina.
Seal flies back from London to Los Angeles for the big separation announcement.
A British model (Victoria Beckham) on the cover of a Japanese magazine with a Spanish name. This is the new world.
Whitney Port wins the award for most beatup suitcase of the day.
Will Smith is getting old before our eyes.

Whitney Port - Film Critic & Idiot

As I have said several times on the site, I have read all the Twilight books. I didn't think they were the greatest things ever, but I did think as the series went on and the author had better editors, the books were decent. I have yet to see the movie due to an ongoing bet which is neither here nor there, but does involve whether or not $240 makes a certain amount of pudding. It is long and complicated unlike Whitney Port.

Whitney decided to go ahead and just drive a stake(nice pun huh) through her career as a reality star by trashing the movie Twilight. I don't care if it is the worst thing she has ever seen, you don't tell an MTV reporter that it was bad or that the acting was bad. Has she seen her own show? Note to Whitney. Besides thinking you are too good for yourself, you might want to take a look at the demographics of your show. The people who watch your show are the ones who love Twilight, whether it be the books or the movies. And, when it comes to them choosing who they would rather watch, I'm pretty sure they are going to stick with Twilight.

You don't tick off the fans who gave you just enough ratings to earn another paycheck for a year. What you do is you tell them how much you love Robert Pattinson and leave it at that. Instead she called the acting horrible, the chemistry between the two stars awful and that doesn't see what all the fuss is about. Hear those crickets? They are the only ones who will be watching your show next season.

I Hate Myself Right Now - Slightly NSFW

I hate myself right now because I am going to spend the next fifteen minutes of my life writing about Whitney Port. I know, I know, but I wanted to talk about she and MTV will apparently do anything to get people to watch her show. Did you happen to notice any naked photos or exposed breast photos of Whitney on the internet yesterday? Me either and as a guy who looks at a lot of websites, I think I would have noticed and at least taken a look. I'm not going to watch the show, but simply for educational purposes mind you.

The only reason I did go searching is that apparently since most people didn't notice, Whitney took it upon herself to write about it on her blog. It must suck when you think you are a star and no one notices that you showed a breast for the world to see. She described it as a bikini malfunction caused by "the rough and tumble of the ocean and just was enjoying the sun and sand and didn't notice it." Whatever. She said she is embarrassed and blah, blah, blah. What she should be embarrassed about is her stupid show. How is that she is already in Miami on vacation while all of her fellow "co-workers" at Diane von Furstenberg probably don't even get any vacation until they have worked there for a year? Yeah, that is reality.

You want to show reality? Show her going back and forth to work from a studio apartment 300 sq feet in size that she shares with two other people and a rat the size of Elvis. And I'm not talking about 50's Elvis either. Show her having to go to parties to get free food so she can afford to eat on the crap wages she makes. Instead she is flying all over the country with her friends. Whatever.

Anyway, I am not going to post the photo, although I did find it. I also don't think it was caused by the rough and tumble of the ocean. I think it was caused by the microphone pack that was attached to her bikini top and then her going into the water with it on. Take a look at the photos below. And, you will notice in the bottom photo, that she and whoever she is about to dry hump by the pool seem to be awaiting an "action" command from the director. Now all they need is a fluffer and they are good to go.

Well They Are Just "Everyday People"

In what will probably be the only post I ever write about the new Hills spinoff show The City, I found it humorous that "everyday people" seem to resent the "star" that is Whitney Port. According to the NY Post, the people who toil and sweat each day in the offices of Diane von Furstenberg are not actually allowed to do any work. The reason? Well, Whitney is supposed to be working at Diane's office but barely shows up and when she does show up she flubs her lines on a fairly regular basis. Who knew there were lines on a reality show? Wow. The next thing you will tell me is that Rock Of Love is fixed.

Because MTV has so many reshoots they need to do each day they have instructed the people at Diane's office to not change anything on their desks. As a result, no work is actually getting done at the office because nothing can shift positions until a scene has actually been shot. Hey, here's a thought. Why not actually show a reality show that is reality and have people wander up to Whitney and ask her who the hell she is, how she got a job at Diane's at the first place and wtf they should care she is ruining their life. Then we could have them crank call her, send her porn filled e-mails and wait for the inevitable tears as they send her back to LA where she came from.

Too harsh? I just think that reality television was at its best when it actually was reality. Sure there was lots of editing involved but at least what the cameras picked up was actual reality and not some scripted show. At this point, if what the NY Post says is true, at the very least MTV should be paying all of the people in the office as extras and buying them lunch everyday. If not, I would just say f**k it if I were an employee there and do everything I could to make the filming even more laborious and I guarantee you if everyone joined in, MTV would decide that Whitney really didn't need to be at the office "working" very much at all.