Friday, January 21, 2011

Jennifer Aniston To Rehab?


The National Enquirer decided to go ahead and turn Jennifer Aniston's drinking into some kind of needs to go to rehab article. They talk about all the booze she likes and how she likes to party so to them it means she needs rehab. Meh. I think she is someone who likes to drink and likes to have fun. I mean she needs to do something while chain smoking her Merit cigarettes.

Do you think it is possible that an article about Jen needing to go to rehab could still have an Angelina Jolie spin to it? Well, of course. They say that when Jen drinks she starts trashing Angelina and complaining about how Brad is no longer in her life. Please. I will say this. If Jennifer did go to rehab, the tabloids would all rush to include Angelina in the headlines and how Brad will rush to her side and the idiots at OK! would probably try and have her pregnant or something while in rehab. You know, from a bedside visit of Brad.

35 comments:

Merlin D. Bear said...

Enty, did you get a third job as a writer for the Enquirer, or is this post your audition for same?

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Who is writing this blog today?

Zeke Zzypt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Zeke Zzypt said...

Aniston has gorgeous, stunning tits. I'd love to suck on those hooters while I banged her box.

Zeke Zzypt said...

Can't blame Brad for dumping, though. I bet Angelina spins on his cock when she's high on heroin.

brendalove@gmail.com said...

You know, I've always been passive about the whole Jennifer Aniston thing, but now I wish something really really good would happen to her, be it a relationship or a good movie or just whatever. I want to see something really wonderful happen for her.

RocketQueen said...

^^ Is there a school holiday today?

Nonsense. Jen likes to get her drank on...why shouldn't she? It's her friend Chelsea Handler that needs rehab.

RocketQueen said...

@brendalove - that was for the person above you ;p)

shakey said...

She will never be rid of The Brange. Even when she's 90.

strawberrygirl said...

This is laughable. She isn't married and isn't responsible for kids, so why can't she party it up? Shoot, I'd love to party with her! I bet she is so fun.

Janet296 said...

Stop beating a dead horse. They split up 6 or 7 years ago. Nobody pines that long. Anyway who would want Brad and his 50 kids?

MCH said...

LOL @ Rocket Queen! :)

@Janet296 No kidding. Not me either.

Some other stupid article said something about weekly vodka parties. Who says that?

selenakyle said...

Ooooooookkkkkaaaaayyyyyy.

We haven't seen troll action in a while on here...I guess we were due, huh?

MISCH said...

Jen bounced around before Brad...and now after....I feel bad for her...

selenakyle said...

And like I would judge! I drink 6 nights out of 7, for fuck's sake. I'll take a vodka party, or a champagne party, or a rum party, or a bourbon party...does not matter.

Who GIVES A SHIT?

We should ALL be in rehab for SOMEthing, for chrissakes.

I think the Enquirer needs to find another whipping post/money-maker.

What really bugs me about Aniston is her shitty movie choices. Why can't she get another gig like that stylish Clive Owen thriller? She actually *acted* in that movie, IMO. Everything else has been the same old rehashed rom-com dreck.

amoteafloat said...

Selena, just pay the toll, pet his goats, and continue across the bridge. That's what I just did, anyway.

I hope this story IS true, and I hope she goes away someplace so pretty that she ends up deciding to stay there forever and ever. And Kate Hudson ends up joining her one day, and we'll *never* have to watch agony-inducing previews for their terrible films ever, ever again. Oh, let me dream...

Patty said...

I think amoteafloat is onto something there.

nancer said...

sorry, but when you're past 40, it's really not cool to drink a whole lot and 'party'. so IF (and i emphasize IF) she's overdoing it, then i hope she does get a handle on it and go to rehab if necessary.

there's nothing worse than a grown woman who drinks excessively---and i know, because i WAS one.

selenakyle said...

Ha haaa, I agree @ amoteafloat!

"pet his goats" I love that!

selenakyle said...

Considering all my other over-40 female friends are being pickled by their prescription drugs, I'll take my chances with the drink. I don't even take aspirin so it's either the weed or the drink...

mikey said...

I'm not her biggest fan, but she looks too good to be a really heavy drinker. When you are over 40 the drinking takes a toll.

sunnyside1213 said...

Please don't make me pet the goats.

linnea said...

I dont think there is anything wrong with still drinking once you are over 40...

Petting the goat sounds like a really, really gross sex position

nancer said...

i didn't say you couldn't drink past 40, for christsake. what i said was if you're hitting it hard all the time, you have a fucking problem. that's kid stuff---if you're still doing that later on, you need to take a good look at yourself.

Ruse said...

Personally I don't think she's been lookin too good as of late. I'm not saying she's not an attractive woman, she most certainly is, but let's give Photoshop credit where it's due.

I actually can't believe I'm even commenting on this story, the whole Brad/Angelina/Aniston thing is sooooooooo boring. I'd drink daily too if people kept bringing up my marriage that ended 7 years ago.

Ugh Merit Cigarettes, who is she, my Nanna?

parissucksliterally said...

I am not really buying her as a drunk. I know she is a major pot smoker. The potheads I know usually prefer it, rather than do both on a regular basis.

hunter said...

Alcoholism is a self-diagnosed disease (that is, unless your doctor tells you your liver is shot; in that case, it's the doctor making the diagnosis.) If Jen's life hasn't become "unmanageable", if she's still functioning and still working (showing up on time, knowing her lines etc) and not losing friends or getting DUI's, if she's not getting fat from the booze and doesn't mind the hangovers....in other words, if she doesn't WANT to get sober, then it's certainly not for the National Enquirer to say that she should.

She was definitely tipsy at the People's Choice Awards, which isn't exactly a good sign - but that kind of thing has happened to non-problem drinkers, too, so it's not a slam dunk indicator of a problem.

hunter said...

However Nancer you hit it, sister - being a party girl over 40 ain't cute anymore...but it sure helps you from growing up and facing yourself. It also GREATLY contributes to making really bad relationship choices - another thing Miss A seems prone to do...

Mango said...

Heavy drinking would make her put on weight and our Jen ain't up for that.

What I'd like to know is what low-cal snacks she munches on after smoking her dubage.

selenakyle said...

Sorry nancer... I got a little defensive there!

I do drink too much, but it's only ever at home or at a friend's or on the boat or at camp where we are not in public making asses out of our old selves! Plus I eat well and drink a ton of water.

Doc says the liver is A-OK but I do get it checked...

I will admit this: my main prob is the BP which drinking sends thru the roof...but I fake out the Dr. by power-exercising right before my physicals. I love my super-low insurance too much to take meds, so I'm just gonna keep it this way! Fuck it, I will die of something.

*heads over to the champers*

relapse much? said...

someone is gonna end up in a treatment program before the year is out. denial, ain't just a river in egypt.

Sis said...

I have three sisters who have not "grown" out of their partying alcoholic ways.

Chelsea Handler is a huge drunk, and I never heard about them being friends until this year.

I too wish she would make better choices in movie roles, but hey she gets a ton of bucks no matter what roles she plays, she may not be concerned about it all.

I mostly like Kate Hudson movies but thought after her Oscar nomination which I think she did an excellent job in the movie Almost Famous, it is surprising that she takes the same ditzy type movie roles, except for the scary one about voodoo in Louisana.

cowbulls said...

I don’t understand all the hating on JA. She has made the decision that her career was more important than a relationship and I respect her right to make that decision.

We all remember a girl like JA, she was the girl from high school that everyone banged but no one wanted to take home to meet their Mother. It's a well know fact that she will spread her legs or hit her knees for anyone that can help her career. The male writers on Friends used to brag about how Aniston would let them bang her if they'd give her a few extra lines per show or the best jokes. Go over to the Smoking Gun and check it out. It's all in a lawsuit filed by a former female writer. Men use her for sexual release and run like their pants are on fire to get away from her.

I also heard some columnist named Ian Halperin reported that she had a very bad female odor. Surely with her bank account she can find a cure for that condition.

JA made those choices so she gets a pass from me. I think all the negative attention is because at one time she was "America's sweetheart". As these pictures clearly show, she still has a great body.

fletch_in_dubai said...

I work in celeb magazines, and here’s the thing…

You put Aniston on the cover and sales go up. EVERY time. She sells mags like no other woman on earth.

If you want the mags to stop running these types of story about her then stop buying the mag when she’s on the cover.

If you want to see more tales from the life of Aniston then keep buying it when she’s the cover star.

As always, YOU decide.

Char said...

I wish Jennifer Anniston would realize and accept that she is really good at playing Rachel. She should get another gig on TV where she can play that kind of character, every day, be popular and make a good living, and then maybe her personal life would stop being dragged through the mud every week. I mean Courtney Cox was able to accept that she's is really good at playing a funny neurotic role on tv, and she's doing that again, and doing it well. Take a page, Jen. As far is this rehab crap, total BS. Just another way to get another Jen and Angie story. Why do people still buy this garbage?