Saturday, April 14, 2012

The Secret Service Got Their Freak On


An advance team of US Secret Service agents got into trouble because at least one of them did something with a hooker he shouldn't have done. I doubt the agency would recall 12 agents from the field if one of them had sex with a hooker so you get the feeling something else happened and that it was probably pretty bad. 12 agents is a lot of agents to get into trouble. Maybe one agent showed the hooker where the President would be sleeping or they had sex in that bed and the other agents made sure all the video gear was working properly while it was going on. It's the government so the truth may or may not come out but I bet it is really interesting. Do you think the hooker was killed and they all covered it up? Maybe she tried to shake him down for more money and the next thing she knew 12 Secret Service agents were there with guns.


The reality is the 12 guys were drunk and they refused to pay so she called the cops. Apparently the fact they were drunk and had sex with hookers is ok, it is the fact they drew attention to themselves that is bad.

34 comments:

Jennifer H. said...

"The Hangover - Secret Service Style."

ABlake said...

When it comes to politics and people being thrown under the bus, you can be pretty certain that nothing is what it seems.
It's always interesting (to me at least) that stories like this tend to break on weekends, when they will pretty much be all but ignored.

nolachickee said...

If the real story was like that brothel scene in Godfather 2, now that would be interesting. Obama wakes up in a room with a bloody, dead hooker. He claims he doesn't know what happened. The 12 agents come in to clean up the mess, and the story is changed to look like they are guilty of something. Obama's hands are "clean".

Still, they got drunk, refused to pay the hooker, and are taken out of the field? Not buying that story either.

kj said...

where's jack bauer when you need him. hope someone saved the film

pilly said...

Secret service? I just won the Grand National!

Dani said...

Unfortunate they draw attention to themselves in this way. I've had the pleasure of working with the advance team in the past & they were very nice, extremely professional.

Sarah said...

Way to keep it classy, S.S.

SaintsFan said...

What hooker will call police for not getting paid? That is like a bank robber calling cops because the cashier won't hand over the money. There is def something else going on.

Thea said...

Hahaa, reminds me of that Arrested Development episode with Buster and the narcoleptic hooker in the cake.

Barton Fink said...

I thought the same thing when I read that they were really just in trouble for not paying. Man, those cushy jobs are gone now.

Jasmine said...

What a minute....ONE hooker took on 12 beefy S.S.?!?!? HOLY SHIT

That woman deserves every bit of the money she had coming to her.
She's gonna need it for the giant block of ice she'll have to put on her vagina.

Yeah, I totally went there ;-P

SusanB said...

@saintsfan - I read that prostitution is legal in certain areas of Columbia.

Sounds like the Secret Service really needs a shakeup - a newsperson this morning suggested that since most of the agents are married, a blackmail situation could have developed where a terrorist or assassin or someone could have been given access to the president. My personal feeling is that one guy refused to pay the hooker and his pals tried to help him out of an escalating situation. I've also heard 2 stories, one is that they were ordered back to DC by the head of the SS and the other is that Columbia expelled them, which is even more damaging.

FS said...

Way to besmirch an entire department. SS is harder to get in than CIA in some instances, and they are supposed to be squeaky clean. The advance guys are supposed to be experts at being subtle as well. What a bunch of morons.

I doubt we will ever learn the truth and I'm not sure I want to. Let them come home in disgrace and face their wives and children. For some of them, that will be punishment enough. Losers.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

This sounds like the plot of that movie "Very Bad Things." She was probably killed the same way Jeremy Piven killed that hooker in that movie. Then they all decided to cover it up.

warmislandsun said...

Just in time for Income Tax due date. A reminder that our money is being used on alcohol and prostitutes. (This has been 50/50 complaint/sarcasm.)

Snakeoiler said...

It is improper grammar to start a sentence with a numeral. Either you spell it out, or you don't have it at the beginning of the sentence.

Geez. Where is Strunk & White when you need it?

auntliddy said...

Saints, i saw cop show once where guy flagged down cop to tell him he gave somd guy $10 bucks for drugs, and the guy took money and didng gv drugs!!! The cop was like r u kidding me?? So it can happen!
I never understand this hooker crap anyway. Just go to bed, jerk off, no harm, no foul.

Rickatoo said...

JBE, I was thinking the exact same thing!

david91 said...

Well, they got secretely serviced

smiles said...

They better call Olivia Pope!

Steppy said...

Since no one knows anything - would it be okay to calm the h*ll down? A team was pulled. That's all that is known at this point.

Can you save your judgmental comments until you have a vague idea of anything?

b said...

Trust me, you don't have to be squeaky clean to be in the Secret Service. My uncle is an agent and is one of the most horrible human beings I know! Since he is a sociopath and intelligent, his tracks must have been covered well enough.
Of course, not all of them are like that, but the title does give people a sense of power and of being untouchable, which sometimes encourages good people to become shitty and shitty people to become shittier.

MadLyb said...

If you had sex with a hooker, you did exactly what you should've done. If she ended up dead, well...shit. I hope there is a proper investigation. :(

Oh, and this is where I put in my schpiel for sex workers. They deserve better - I'm talking good benefits and affordable healthcare, along with fair wages.

luci skywalker said...

MadLyb-
Im am SO with you!!

+ the secret services are really called the S.S. ?? :S (saw it in the comments above)

Lelaina Pierce said...

Oooh, intriguing. I hope to hear more about this story!

hunter said...

GO Secret Service, go Secret Service GO!!!

Getcher freak on...

Henriette said...

How dumb not to pay the hooker!

Henriette said...

@Steppy
It's a gossip site!

Yes we are going to have fun making fun of dumbass secret service agents!

I don't think it was one hooker with 12 guys, but one agent who did not pay one hooker. I think the other agents paid proper.

packer said...

I read this and I laughed.The white house has not had a good week.

ardleighstreet said...

How old was the hooker??? I'd pull their ass too if she was underage.
Even if it was only 1 doing the deed but te others knew he did it.

Marie said...

A hooker called the cops for non payment? Can they do that? lol

Marie said...

A hooker called the cops for non payment? Can they do that? lol

Jennmcn said...

Always pay a Colombian hooker. Prostitution is legal in most of Colombia. Plus the Colombian government would love to embarrass Obama. He jerked them around on the US-Colombian trade agreement extension.

Obama will punish these 12 guys big time but will do nothing to Holder and Napolitano for the "Fast and Furious" gun walking debacle that cause the deaths of hundreds of Mexicans and an ICE officer.

Helen Lawson said...

Whatever they did was so stupid they preferred to go with this as a cover story.