Friday, May 17, 2013

Random Photos Part Four

Congratulations to Candice Glover who worked and worked for three years and finally achieved her goal of winning American Idol. Now she will fade into obscurity.

Amanda Bynes is Jesus.
Courtney Stodden tries to look like Marilyn and ends up looking like a poodle.
Emma Watson in W.
Andrew Garfield takes time off from Spiderman to walk his dog.
Gisele Bundchen probably has a dog walker.
I'm not sure if Halle Berry even has a dog.
Jaime King shows off her baby bump.
Jennifer Lopez wanted to be a gymnast or loves S&M.
Jane Lynch opened on Broadway yesterday. I heard she was great. She is in the umpteenth version of Annie.

72 comments:

greenmountaingal said...

Andrew Garfield needs to eat.

Gisele has such a butter face. I will never understand why Tom Brady dumped the beautiful Bridget Moynihan for her.

I don't know what JLo is wearing, but she looks hot.

I like Jamie King.

Kimberly Joyce said...

KILL: Courtny Stoddin
FUCK: Amanda Bynes (I bet she's a little spitfire in bed)
MARRY: JLo! (I LOVE HER!! She is who I look up to most out of celebrities!)

KPeony said...

I can't wait for Amanda to repost that on instagram with #nofilter

Count Jerkula said...

Watson: she prolly got some pussy left to murder

My sweet Mandy

Giselle: She got cheatin to win the Super Bowl stank on her so that knocks her down the list some.

@ KJ: marry JLo, really? Even Affleck wasn't that stupid.

Anna Nonymous said...

Wow J. Lo for the nod to MV... very sneaky. Ok, not that sneaky. I hope that Candace Glover doesn't fade in to obscurity! She was the most talented on there, I'm glad that she won. Who knows where she'll go. Look at that, damn, what's her name... the weight loss one? Jennifer Hudson, she hasn't faded in to obscurity. She sang at the inauguration, and at the super bowl. there's always room for true talent and a good attitude. Who am I kidding. I just hope she does well and has all of her dreams come true. Stodden is quickly sleazing her way to the bottom. if it weren't for air grinding and iquana purring for the horny tmz camera men would she even be known? A young ho was sold to an old never was for "infamy/fame".

Sorry for thinking you were a troll Kimberly Joyce, just didnt remember seeing you before and you were popping in alot on the day that shall not be named.

Sugar said...

I love the stunned expression on Candace's face.
And my love for The Iguana Goddess is boundless! She slays me!

MK for short said...

Great photo of Emma Watson. I really wish people would stop taking Stodden's picture. Blech.

Mirame said...

@greeenmountaingal - Geez, I don't know about Tom Brady... maybe he never was with any of those women solely for their looks?

I'm so tired of JLo. She could take a break.

Kimberly Joyce said...

Count Jerkula, please don't call me stupid just because you can't excuse her for her beauty (inside AND out!)

Anna, thank you. I really appreciate that.

Now if you'll all excuse me, my boyfriend wants me to go uproot the rose bushes :(

Bacon Ranch said...

Candice Congrats! Love takes time

Grace said...

I find the Stodden comparison offensive to my poodle.

MelTheLibrarian said...

Emma Watson is gorgeous in that picture. Just flawless. Andrew Garfield looks like an anorexic or heroin addict. And Jaime King's baby bump looks like my tummy everyday. And no, I am not pregnant. Sad face!

PugsterMom said...

Am I the only one that feels sorry for LA Stodden? Pimped out by her parents. Totally misguided child bride. Doesn't get it that she's a ho and that no one actually admires her. Everyone is laughing at her.

Layna Day said...

Enty: always pissing on dreams before they start. How about we give Candice a couple of years before we go into SHE'S A WORTHLESS FAILURE mode?

Tyger Lilly said...

Courtney Stodden? Really? I don't understand why anybody besides that pedophelic husband/boyfriend/rapist takes her picture or why anybody prints them. The ONLY single story that should have involved this person should have followed the headline: Talentless Underage Whore Is So Stupid She Thinks Marrying A Pederast 40+ Years Her Senior With One Minor Hit Acting Role Will Solve Her Daddy Issues.

Please, Enty... If it's a slow news day just re-print some old photos or BIs or an ad for anything. This insults us.

Layna Day said...

Pugster Mom, I'm with you. Ever since I saw that video of her eating out of a puppy bowl, my heart breaks for Courtney. It's obvious that no one cares about her and she's too young/naive/emotionally stunted to understand. It's a real shame.

sylmarillion said...

Look at the picture below yours, Ms. Stodden. Now THAT is how you do sexy.

shopgirl said...

Damn, Emma, gorgeous photo.

Anna Nonymous said...

Jerkula: do you really need to say she looks like she has some P### left to murder? I know shock is your thing, and we've scrapped on Watson before, but do you have to put it in such harsh words? How about: She's probably still got some bloom on her delicate feminine flower... I kid...I kid... but can you not chill a little with the porny/horny tacky language? Just a little bit? Please?

Gayeld said...

Wear gloves!

Count Jerkula said...

@Anna: it was a refernce to why she got the top spot over Miss Mandy. I type the first thing that pops in my head, if it is too coarse for you, i am sorry. When did we clash over Emma before?

@Miss Joyce: Apologies to you also. I wasn't trying to make a pesonal insult to you, I meant that to be more rhetorical. I hope you don't holr one misstep against me.

Just Browsing said...

@Gayeld said... Wear gloves!

I am chuckling that those of us "not on a mobile" can pick which post we would like that comment to be in reference too!!

Just Browsing said...

aaaack - "to" not "too"

Robert said...

Did anyone ever find Courtney Stodden even remotely attractive? I've seen better faces than that on a Clorox bottle. Can't imagine she could even do porn successfully, unless they'll simply hire any female who's willing to have sex on camera.

Anna Nonymous said...

@ The Count, don't worry about it, I'm not holdling on to anything. The words just hit me the wrong way. Just rememered the first time I saw your name you were talking about Emma, being underage blah blah, it's so unimportant as to not merit going into it again. Thanks for listening, you really aren't such a bad guy. You'd make some freaky woman very happy, and I mean that in the nicest possible way.

froggygurl said...

Halle is a cat lady. A crazy cat lady, but a cat lady. She's been in Cat Fancy a few times and supports animal charities.

GemTwist said...

@Anna seriously. He won't stop though. This is probably the only time he interacts with actual females, so he has to grace us with all his knowledge gleaned from years of lonely porn viewing. How many ppl came out of the woodwork last week to say they wish he would stfu? He doesn't care. He's getting too much of a rush out of this.

GemTwist said...

I actually think it's kind of important to remember the time the count said he wanted to rape a minor. i certainly won't forget.

Boxes Little Boxes said...

@GemTwist,

I know he's pretty profane (sorry, B.) but I don't recall Count Jerkula saying something about wanting to rape a minor. When was this?

Pythia said...

Stumbled on this gem of Stodden getting into a car. Hope that is her underwear showing (do not know how to embed links).

http://www.dlisted.com/node/49721/images/spl533689_025.jpg

PugsterMom said...

I think I'm especially sorry for her because my daughter is her age and at least she had loving parents to guide her. It's me in Mom mode.

Tempestuous Grape said...

Ohhh, I bet Jane is so good in that role!

yodelay said...

Sometimes I think Enty puts up the Emma Watson pics just for Marieee's benefit. On topics other than Ms Watson, she's kinda witty.

GemTwist said...

@boxes during that whole mess last week. Talking about his super fascinating date-rape fantasies. i believe he was talking about Elle Fanning.

Zeeky_Boogy_Doog said...

Terrifying! I have long white hair, and work outside so I pull my hair up. When I got home, all yucky from wind and heat, I took my hair down. It was all curly and poofy, and I looked just like Courtney Stodden! Aaaaaa!!! Kill it with fire!!!

parissucksliterally said...

greenmtngal, we have a lot of the same opinions, but here we differ. I think Gisele is gorgeous.

Is the black woman Candice? She is beautiful.

Bacon Ranch said...

Gemtwist
I second boxes, when did he say that?
You're right however, quite a few people came out of the woodwork and bitched about him last week.
What you left out is that even more came out in his defense last week.

I'm sure it was just an oversight on your behalf.

Del Riser said...

I think Candace will do well, she certainly has the talent.

Courtney couldn't do porn she'd have to take off her four push up bras, and her partner would get all oompa-
loompa looking from the contact. I do feel sorry for her, no way for a girl to grow up.

Count Jerkula said...

@ gemtwist: you are full of shit and the fact that your story has already changed, and you threw in the caveat "I believe" should make it obvious to every one.

Keep pulling snippets from different posts of mine and mashing them together. It gives me great pleasure to know you hate me enough to out yourself as a lying *@#$€£¥¿!

@Anna: oh yeah. sometimes i am amazed that no matter how over the top i go, people take me seriously.

greenmountaingal said...

It's all good. I still heart you :)

TeacherNan said...

I usually lurk cuz I have trouble with posting comments (a Google prob? Who knows? I'm kind of a dumbass with computers), but I love to read the Count's comments. He makes me laugh almost as much as Michael K., the potty-mouthed Snark King! Carry on, Count! I get ya!

Jenn said...

The Stodden person gives me heebs because I know she's married to a creeper. Ick.

Steampunk Jazz said...

well guys, it's been fun. This last 3 weeks have been great. I have to go back to work (This is all the time I can afford off for a broken wrist) So... it's back to lurking. hopefully, I can catch up on my day off. Be Cool and Stay Frosty.

Vicki Lon said...

So people calling her a 'whore' remember her age.

Redd said...

I sure dont know why Stodden down trodden gets any space bere at all, she is the epitome of a life wasted, even at her young years. If this keeps up I'm going back under the bed. I hope she looses one of those stupid lucite shoes up Doug's ass. And count on the Count to B Profane, it is his style, c'est la vie. Emma should have rated the top spot here.

Redd said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
ecua said...

You're wicked!

sleep_deprived said...

Agreed about Gisele. Man face

DewieTheBear said...

The people who leapt to the defense of Jerkula are the circle-jerkers who encourage him. The fact that many more people lurk without commenting as frequently as others, for whatever reason (work, life, lack of compelling posts) doesn't invalidate those opinions when they are aired.

I seriously hope this site goes to moderated comments. And that our little friend learns to use xvideos like an adult (with an actual account where he can share his favorites appropriately).

Count Jerkula said...

@TeacherNan: Thank you. I am glad to be able to bring some joy into your day.

@Steampunk: Take care. Pop in and say "Hi" sometime.

@Redd: Please don't lump me in w/ B Profane. Dude got no game and he has had multiple meltdowns on here. Thank you.

@Dewie the Bear: This site will probably go to moderated comments right after you get a clue.

Go check the Alexa stats for the site from Friday's troll attack and the Saturday arguing.

Time On Site: up 31% over 7days

Traffic Rank: Up 3,893 spots over 7 days

Page Views per User: up 25% over 7 days

% of Global Page Views: up 35% over 7 days

Traffic equals $$. Do the world a favor and hold your breath until the comments are moderated.

And about me posting, the fact that you think I am motivated by praise demonstrates how truly clueless you are.

Team JTT said...

I mean... KJ HAS to be a troll. I've been a long time reader and only started commenting on the day that shall not be named as well. But since that day I've noticed with her comments that there has been enough BS woven in to warrant a side eye. I mean... Marry JLo?? Serrriously??

Taracu said...

+1
Trolllllllie fo sho.

Boxes Little Boxes said...

I'm still not sold on Courtney Stoddard's age. It's all too weird. Who allows their 17 year old daughter marry a random guy and is OK with her doing the hooker look 6 months later? I am well past 18 and still get carded. This is not normal behavior.

Someone mentioned her birth certificate as proof of her age. President Obama's birth certificate isn't proof enough for some people and POTUS was born in Hawaii.

gr8p said...

Bless Gisele's heart, she ain't a looker is she? haha

oh, Courtney...white face and orange body is not the look.

Anna Nonymous said...

Yess... indeed. Marry J. Lo? You look up to her? For what reason exactly? Is it the fake singing? The fake relationship (s)? The diva attitude with zero talent/ability to justify it? The creation of a career based on being Hispanic and having a bubble but?
As far as the Count is concerned, so what if this is the only female interaction that he gets? Wouldn't it be better to give him some positive interaction and show him that women aren't all either shrewish judgemental betches that pick on him or blow up doll porn star sex objects for him to fap to? I find I get more bees with honey, as the old saying goes.

Count Jerkula said...

@Anna: You saying you wanna pollinate? Height and location, Sweetie ;)

Anna Nonymous said...

You're sweet.

Carolyn said...

Emma looks so beautiful.

Sometimes I feel like retching when I see Courtney Stodden. Then when more compassionate folks remind me of what she had been through, I do find myself feeling sorry for her. If the rumors about her mom are true, she never had much of a chance.

Carolyn said...

I lurk so much but rarely comment because I could get in a lot of trouble at work hanging out here during the workweek, especially when the comments get .... frisky. You know who you are. :)

Sarah said...

On a positive note, your remark that even Affleck knew better was the best of the day

Tara said...

Hang tight Count. Lots of us here appreciate your intelligence and wit, even if you occasionally succeed in grossing us out:)

Count Jerkula said...

Thank you ladies. It warms my heart to know that every time you give me praise, it makes the Dewie's of the world that much madder.

TeacherNan said...

Am I supposed to go thru some initiation or pay rent, or club or space fees to post if I've mostly just lurked? Let me know when I am welcome to post, even if it is to leap to another's defense. Thank _______(insert name of favored deity here) we have freedom of speech, thought, opinion, sense of humor, lifestyle, fetishes, etc. It's what makes the world go 'round. I'll continue to post or just lurk, if that's OK. I usually scroll past the boring commenters anyway, and search out the commenters who interest me. :)

Count Jerkula said...

@TeacherNan: Just jump in and start posting. If anyone is annoyed with what you say, F em. Ignore their response if you want to act above it, or engage them if you need to vent some bile.

Naomi said...

Halle has a dog, a dog of a boyfriend that is. And yes, finally someone agrees with me - Gisele has a butter face. She kind of has a masculine face, in fact he is prettier than she is.

PM said...

MV is your idol?
- side eye -

Kimberly Joyce said...

Blah blah blah, someone likes something I hate, blah blah blah, must be a troll, blah blah BLAH

Get some new material please and thank you :D

Izzie said...

@TeacherNan - the initiation rituals are Sunday and Friday. Clothing optional, but bring some tea. :)

Fairmaiden327 said...

KJ is a troll

MLE said...

@count jerkula,

Seeing as I've normally (with a few odd moments of agreement!) held you in similar esteem as Dewie, & Mooshkie do--though to be fair, many people do seem to enjoy your comments--I would like to attempt to suss out how much of what you spew is real, and how much is puffery from behind an anonymous screen.


While I may not post all that often, I've read since near the beginning. Often, when I read the commentary on any given thread, I'm struck by your response to people disagreeing with you. You always seem to deflect or insult said commenter. I'm calling your bluff, let's meet in person.

Let's meet in a public space in N. Cali. Maybe Sherri, (whom I adore) will agree to come as well (she expressed a desire to meet you recently). Sherri could be a wonderful, neutral presence.

To be clear, I'm just a woman interested in putting a face to the avi and understand if your view is somewhat normal (i.e. what guys think but know they can't actually say) OR if you just post inflammatory b.s. knowing this is a site frequented by women where you can be one of the few males.

Ya' up for it, count? Sherry? I am. I think it could be fun. C'mon, let's meet!

Alita said...

Hehe KJ :D

Count Jerkula said...

@MLE: I try not to insult the people who complain about me, generally I go after their words. Many times I have typed out responses, only to delete them after proofreading and deeming them hurtful and not just arguing. There are special cases though, where posters have chosen to personally insult me or lied to make me sound worse than I am.

My screen name should be an indication of what I'm trying to do. Some of it is real, some of it is trying to be a jerk. Some of it is real, just presented bluntly, which some don't like. Some of it is "Holy shit, they thought that was real? Lets see if they buy this."

I live in NJ, so I won't be in Cali anytime soon. If you want insight to what men really think, then I'd suggest lurking on some "man-centric" boards.