Monday, October 06, 2008
I know Mike Tyson is not the same boxer that he was 20 years ago. Hell, I don't think he is even the same person. Would he gets his ass kicked by the top 30-40 heavyweights in the world if he got back in the ring? Sure he would. But, I don't want him to go back in the ring and fight for millions. Nope. What I want to do is raise a few thousand bucks and have Mike Tyson kick the crap out of Michael Lohan.
It seems that Michael Lohan fancies himself somewhat of an athlete. In addition to wanting to be the celebrity rehab king, Michael has signed up for some charity boxing event that takes place on November 24. Apparently, no other celebrity of any stature bothered to sign up which means that Michael gets to be the center of attention.
On the date above, Michael is going to go three rounds in a boxing ring with the highest bidder in an event called the Long Island Fight For Charity. There are 10 fights scheduled with proceeds from each fight going to charities in the region. In order to be able to fight, each participant must raise $5000. What it is probably going to be is a bunch of bosses fighting their disgruntled assistants, but in Michael's case, according to the organizers, bids are coming in from all over the world.
I think that Lindsay Lohan should immediately hock that ring of hers, go do some porn, and raise whatever money she can and send it to Mike Tyson. Anyone who is roughly the same size as Michael can enter. See, Mike Tyson is a fairly short guy, and so, I think he would qualify. The rules don't say anything about previous experience, they just don't want some extra huge guy going up against a tiny guy. Makes sense because you don't want someone killed. Kind of puts a damper on the whole charity part of the evening.
I think getting in the ring against Mike Tyson would probably shut Lohan up for good. I mean like jaw wired for good. Sure, there would be the odd strongly worded letter, but who knows if Michael can even write so, it is much preferred to his blathering on television cameras. Sure, at his upcoming wedding they might have to put his cake in a blender first, but that is what he gets for thinking he is Mr. Tough Guy.
One good bite of his ear, and I think we won't be seeing much of Lohan anymore. So, to help contribute, go to lifightforcharity.com and lets do the world a favor and shut up Lohan for good.
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8 comments:
You dream big, Enty. I love it!
hahahahaha! I love it!
Michael Lohan is such a wannabe, a stage-parent, a slob. I wish he would disappear.
I hate boxing, never watch it, but I happened to see the moment that Tyson bit off Holyfield's ear LIVE. So GROSS.
I'll donate if we can see them fight in Pleather!
Just make sure "Iron Mike" doesn't have any food the day of the fight. We can only hope that Tyson will be so hungry that he'll bite more than just Lohan's ear off!
i say we send in Sam Ronson and her gang of merry gayelles.
I vote for Rampage. He's not still in jail is he?
I am embarrassed to say this is about 10 miles away from where I live. Myabe I should go & report back!
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