What Do You Think?
I know Reese Witherspoon got hurt yesterday, but since she is ok, I would like to discuss what got overshadowed by her injury namely what she said in her interview to Marie Claire. I have to admit she sounded a little whiny and not the Reese that I think everyone kind of likes. She said, "I feel so much relief [being married]. I don’t think I realized how stressed I was being a single parent. It was really, really stressful. It’s not easy on anybody."
Being a single parent is stressful, but she makes it seem like in her case that it was the most difficult thing in the world. This coming from a woman who has lots and lots of help, makes a minimum of $30M a year every year, works barely three or four months out of the year, has both her kids in school and has an ex who actually sees the kids often and also does not work much so is always available.
I think she was trying to relate to every woman out there, but it comes off as disingenuous. Stressful is being a single parent and having to work two jobs to make ends meet because the cost of living is so high and your ex does not have a job or is paying too little to matter anyway. Stressful is finding someone to watch your children while you are working the two jobs and having to deal with babysitters not showing up and calling in to work because of it and not getting paid and wondering if you can afford to put food on the table and the cost of health insurance and making sure you spend enough time with your kids. That is stress. Deciding which private school your kids go to or what limo company should bring them home everyday is not stressful.
She also acts like she was not fulfilled without a man in her life and I think that is wrong too. Anyway, I kind of lost some love for Reese with this interview. Am I wrong? What do you think?
53 comments:
The whole being unfulfilled without a man is her Southern/Christian bullshit background. Believe me.
It does sound whiny but I can't fault her.
I hate it when rich chicks act as if they have it waaaaaay worse than the rest of us, bitch please!
Maybe she just felt lonely.
I have a friend like her - loaded and has tons of family and hired help. It is hard to feel sorry for her.
Psychologically, I would think being a single parent is tough. So I sympathize with her there. But it sounds like she married so her husband would take care of the kids...? Hope not. They appear to be happy.
(sigh) - Where's SEM when I need her - and her wisdom?
Maybe bearding for Jake was stressful, but she couldn't say that. She's happy she doesn't have to hide her real relationship anymore.
I agree with you completely on this.
Sorry, I'm not a fan.....and yes I think with all of her resources she is whining.
I believe she even used the word "tramautic" to describe the state of single motherhood, if media reports are correct. Good thing she was only single for about ten seconds after she finally stopped bearding for Toothy Tile. Good thing that agent dude came along to escort her on her thrice-weekly, always-papped church outings. Because GOD FORBID she should experience the terror of being without a man. *eyeroll*
Personally, I don't like Reese. Most of her more recent movies are absolutely terrible, and she comes across as a spoiled, snotty debutante. That "sweetheart" vibe she supposedly exudes is totally lost on me. I think she's a good actress, but I also think she's every bit as insufferable as Gwyneth, if not even more so.
Nice generalization, Vicki. I'm a Southern Baptist, was raised and still live in Texas, am 42, never married, and plenty fulfilled. I've attended church my whole life (my grandfather was a preacher) and I've never heard anything about how women need a big strong man to take care of them. So no, I won't believe you.
I don't care either way, personally. I just can't look at her without screaming in my head "FAKE CHIN!"
OT item here:
Michael K just posted something we all knew from a recent Blind--that Jessica Simpson and Nicole Ritchie hate each other.
Carry on slamming/defending Reese!
As insufferable as Gwenyth is; agreed.
I'm not on board with her idea of how awful it is to be single or a single parent, having done it fairly successfully. But everyone is different. Maybe she feels more comfortable in a steady relationship and stable home life. Of course, you can provide a stable home life as a single parent (I did!) but it is nicer to be in a good marriage if that's what you want. Assuming it's good, of course. Not that easy to do!
I'm with Ida. spoiled, entitled brat, southern style. (though I was relieved she wasn't hurt badly in the car accident.)
she was great in legally blonde and that is about it. I thought she did not deserve her oscar for walk the line.
yes, how do we single ladies do it? its so stressful!
and I agree w/enty totally about the single motherhood. being rich helps w/just about everything.
Yup, spoiled, entitled, whiney brat AND a bitch. Although, she does seem to be a good parent and I'm glad she wasn't hurt. But I still think she's a bee-otch.
There are kinds of stress and levels of stress and therefore I'm don't think her comments are too off base. Yes she has material advantages and that should reduce some forms of stress but that doesn't mean it eliminates stress. If a mother worries about her kids at school what does it matter whether the school is private or public? How many mothers have to worry about photographers and celebrity stalkers going after their kids like she does? To say that because you're rich you can't have stress is absurd.
The whole point of equality and freedom is to be able to choose. I'm independent and prefer it that way, and can only be with a guy who admires independence. She's had great success, but that's no reason to hate her. It's her choice and preference to be married and feels more comfortable with that. Do any of us really have the right to judge? Don't hate!
Sigh. I read this entire article, and to be fair, you missed the part where she said she actually didn't realize how stressed she was until she got married and her new husband was such a help. She said she just felt such an amazing relief when someone joined her in raising the kids, and that he's a terrific step-father. I personally think this was taken out of context, because when I read the entire article, I just came away happy for her.
@RocketQueen -
that's a refreshing voice of sanity. I've discovered that it's nice to feel like you have a partner to share responsibility. And I'm not all that good at accepting help. Or at least I never was before, but I've realized it's kind of nice to feel like part of a unit.
Try to be kind, people!
I haven't liked Reese in years. I'm not sure if I ever truly liked her.
The big difference between Reese and Gwyneth is that for all the flack she gets, Gwyneth is pretty honest about being WASPy. She's pretentious, but she knows it and doesn't go much out of her way to hide it. So I give Gwynnie kudos on that.
Reese has the same WASPy attitude, but tries to fake us into believing otherwise. Heffa, please. You're rich, attractive, have tons of hired help, can work at your leisure, and came out smelling like a rose during your divorce.
Usually both parties get some dirt thrown their way. But not Reese, and it wasn't a situation like Nicole Kidman where the ex was ultra-creepy and hiding things. Ryan Phillippe may be something of a cad, but I do think he cared/loved Reese at some point and tried to do the right thing by marrying her when she got pregnant.
When they divorced, he didn't ask for spousal support even though Reese made a lot more money. He didn't even block her from asking for support, which she didn't do, but still. It may be naive on my part, but I don't think Ryan is such a bad guy. I do think he got tired of being seen as Mr. Reese Witherspoon and when he tried to break away from that, the marriage was as good as over. Reese seems like a control freak.
Her career hasn't been interesting since she took the Legally Blonde role. Her earlier work is good: Freeway, Fear, Pleasantville,Cruel Intentions, Election. Reese took some risks and was praised for them. Now, she just seems to take the easy way to the big paycheck. Which is fine. I've got no issue with that. But don't pretend to be above it all when you're hamming it up as much as the next actress.
It doesn't surprise me that Reese is so obtuse. Folks with their noses that far up in the air tend to be like that. Whatever. It's not like I'm watching her later work, anyway. Heffa can take her prissy behind to the far end of the world, for all I care.
You know, there are many women out there who just don't want to be alone. They WANT marriage, they WANT a man in their lives. Doesn't necessarily mean they NEED one, and it doesn't mean that they are weak, and they would be just fine on their own...they just choose not to be. If a woman enters bad relationships because she doesn't think she deserves better or because she really believes that she is nothing without a man (and this isn't uncommon), THAT is sad...
what Maja said. Nothing wrong with being in a relationship or married. It doesn't make you weak. A good one makes you stronger.
I can't hate on her. I don't like her movies, but she isn't as bad as Gwyneth, who I don't hate either, but do the eyeroll a lot when I come across some of the things she's said, LOL.
Some people just don't like being alone, and that's okay. I don't get it, but to each his own. It is hard being a single parent whether you're rich or not, but definitely harder when you're not because struggling to obtain the basic necessities for someone wholly dependent on you is stressful. I've found some people (very few) simply have never had to worry about that, but it doesn't mean they don't stress like us poor folk do.
I totally agree with you Enty!
She DID sound like she wasnt fulfilled without a man and she DID sound overly whiny which induced feelings from me of unsympathy and a sense that she was out of touch with people who actually DO struggle as single parents.
I get that even the rich struggle with things BUT it gave me that obnoxious feeling, almost like watching a debutante burst into tears over which white dress they should wear to their coming out party- that level of ick nast.
But I do feel sorry for her about the whole Ryan Phillipe thing- they seemed so in love and Ryan cheating was so shitty- I still havent forgiven him for that.
I'm not a big fan of cheaters, but they were young and sometimes people outgrow each other. Sad, but it happens. Nobody knows except the people that were there.
I don't like Reese that much - too Type A for me - but I think raising kids is stressful no matter how much money you have. Unless you're one of the rich bitches who pawn off all the childcare on the nannies, which Reese doesn't seem to be - she's always papped spending time with the kids. She's very lucky not to have to worry about security for them, but there are a million worries raising kids - wanting to make sure you're doing the right thing, protecting them from the world, but still letting them be their own people, and so on. Having a partner to share in decisions, and tell you you're doing the right thing, must be hugely comforting. It wouldn't have hurt her to throw in a line like "I know I'm lucky, but..."
Stress and suffering are relative. Those of us who are poor don't like to hear about rich people's problems, but hell, we're all incredibly lucky not to be starving to death in Somalia right now! I hate to play the "my problems are worse than your problems" game. We're all human, and we're all struggling.
Texshan -- I'm with you. But I'm a few years older, have a kid, never married and am doing just fine. No man needed :)
On the other hand, we do come to CDaN to snark, which makes us feel better, so go ahead and snipe at Reese if you like! LOL
Does she hang out with Gwyneth?
I was raised Southern Baptist by a Divorced, Single Mom in the 70's and early 80's for about 10 years. Times were tough, my Mom was never home trying to make ends meet. My sister and me had to shoulder too much responsibility. I was also a divorced, Single Mom for about 4.5 years. It was not too bad, but I was lonely. It is easier when you have a partner/spouse and I realized that after I remarried. You just feel like you can let your guard down and rest a bit. Reese is very Type A, so a bad day of parenting or whatever for her is probably a great day for us. I am with Rocket Queen on this.
I've never liked her. That's all.
@Mooshki - if you read the whole article, she DID throw in an "I'm lucky". She said she thought she'd never find someone as great as her husband, and can't believe how lucky she is.
RocketQueen, thank you for explaining the article in its entirety. I think the perspective given by the single snippet is unfair. Maybe Reese doesn't have the financial worries or lack of certain types of help that most people have, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have unique stresses that we don't - like running a company, criticized publicly at every turn and followed and filmed at every movement, all while trying to be a hands-on mom. I think she's a great mom, and when you go from being a single mom to having the help of a good husband/ father figure, of course it will show that it was lacking before. I don't hear any woah-is-me or poor-me in that acknowledgement. Being able to talk to a partner in life at the end of the day is awesome, and I'm glad she appreciates what she has. Kids growing up in that area have their own unique issues - they are different and they are real, and I am glad Reese is in the trenches with her kids and always has been. Good for her.
Enty is correct...she was trying to relate but came off sounding desperate.
I do admire that she takes her kids to church almost every Sunday,,who else in Hollywood does that?
She is trying to instill good values and I think she is catholic and you know how they r about divorce.
Geez, people, lighten up on the sanctimony a bit. For supposedly enlightened non-religious folk, some of you are pretty intent on finding the witch and burning her.
I did not see where Reese said she's "not fulfilled" without a man in her life. But such a statement would not be "wrong," just honest. Some people prefer to be paired up, they're just happier that way. It's not a bad thing. Also, about being stressed, I think she made it clear that the stress comes from the fact that divorce is hard on the kids. She felt bad about the affects of the divorce on the children. No where does she say that she has the same stress as a poor single mother. You just read that in for some reason.
Rocket Queen - that's why as much as I love this site, I try to take most things Enty posts with a grain of salt, since he's notorious for taking things out of context or ignoring other parts of someone's comments or whatever. I don't doubt it was much more fully explained in the article.
I like Reese, I think she's a great actress. But I DO think she's a major bitch. Not because of this, just in general. She has that air about her. But I'm cool with it...lol
^ lol Jen, I agree I think she can be a major witch, but I got no complaints with this interview :)
Enty, you are so right about this. Jesus! She makes millions and barley works compared to regular people. What is so stressful? She had no idea what stress is when it comes to her kids.
@Texshan, Texas isn't the South.
It is hard to sympathize with her, knowing how much money/help she has BUT to me she's always come across as a very hands on mom. I admire the way she handled their divorce, without too much much slinging and her and Ryan appear to have a fairly amicable relationship continuing to raise their children together.
@RocketQueen - Thanks for clarifying the article b/c I was a little horrified by the "relief" of being married again. :)
"Texas isn't the South."
So true. Texas really is its own section of the country. I just wish Rick Perry's plan to secede had gone through, then the rest of us wouldn't have to deal with him. ;)
RQ, she said she's lucky to have found him, but did she say she's lucky to be rich as fuck?
When she is a single mother making only minimum wage and raising two young kids then talk trauma. Until then she needs to sit down and STFU.
@ Layna Day
YES! To everything you said :-)
I don't get it. Does this mean her new husband has to take care of her kids? You get remarried to have another parent? From all I've heard, it is actually MORE stressful to be remarried with kids. Usually the kids are not too thrilled with the new spouse AND you still have to deal with the ex AND his/her significant other.
If I get widowed or my hub leaves me, I'm not getting remarried until the kids are at least 30. By then I will be about 80 and not caring.
Henriette--- I could not disagree more with your statement.
As a child who grew up with my mom marrying twice after her and my father divorced I can defintely attest to it being stressful to merge two families together, HOWEVER I WANTED and still want my mom to be happy in her own right and find love.
I think it is such a huge stupid mistake when people put their feelings dead last and their kids so far ahead of their happiness. People who stay in marriages 'for the kids' are also so annoying. I can tell you that kids sense shit very early on: I was 7 when my mom finally ended things with my dad and by that point I told them both they didnt belong together cause they fought too much. Having a happy parent, in whatever capacity that may be, either single OR married, is SO much more important than living your life for your kids.
I knew a woman who said she would not date until her son was out of the house (after her husband left them when the kid was little) and 30 yrs later the son is STILL there and she is alone, now in her mid 50s and living a weird life where her son is the head of the household and she cooks and cleans for him....
To deny your own happiness will ALWAYS bite you in the ass in the end.
Rick Perry and Sarah Palin (since Alaska historically wanted to separate form us) really need to form their own state somewhere, since they are so gung ho about seceding from the US.
My vote?
They get that giant pile of garbage that is currently floating in the ocean somewhere...
plant your flag in that and float off into oblivion, you assholes. Oh, and take Bauchmann with ya please, she can be VP of Crazy Garbage Country.
Just remember, all of us in Texas warned you about Bush! My Texas TV flashes "Rick Perry. Bad for Texas. Worse for our nation." almost constantly. Take heed. His background is insurance, and that's not good for any of us anywhere anytime. When was the last time you had a claim pay off appropriately??
I'm just glad Reese is happy and her kids also seem happy. I don't think for one minute she has had an easy life acting. I think there are more predators in that business than we want to know. It can't be easy for anyone out there.
I don't see anything wrong with her interview within the context of the entire article. Her life is different than our lives so of course that is where she draws her opinions and perspective from. Just because she has millions of dollars and fans doesn't mean that she doesn't have her own unique set of experiences and problems in this world. She has a right to express what's been difficult for her and her problems may seem less problematic because of her circumstances from OUR perspective but her issues affect her like our own issues affect us. Finding a partner to share your life is one of life's very basic desires and there's nothing wrong with her wanting that.
I do have a question: why do people think she is a bitch? I've never seen anything on it.
People think she's a bitch because she has more money and professional success than they do. They're greedy, jealous, resentful, and wretched in their own lives so they bring other people down in order to feel better about themselves.
It's just that simple.
Being married doesn't automatically mean that you have awesome support raising a kid. As an Army wife with a child I feel like a single mom! I just have my bills paid for :)
What?! Texas isn't in the South? That's asanine. Of course it is. It's not in the Deep South, but it is still a Southern state. For people in FloriDUH and Minnesota to pass judgement on whether Texas is part of the South is really, really arrogant. That's like me saying Connecticut isn't part of New England.
Perry never said he wanted to secede from the union. That's as stupid as the whole, "Palin said she could see Russia from her house" whine. Get informed, people, before you start mouthing off.
And Jasmine, you would not be as happy as you think you would be if Alaska and Texas were no longer part of the USA. Believe me. You would definitely miss what those two state provide to the country.
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