Lindsay Lohan Gets Reality Show - Oprah Gets Interview With Lindsay

If you thought every interview Larry King ever did with a celebrity was a butt kissing extravaganza, you might want to set your DVR's for when Oprah interviews Lindsay Lohan. Never known for asking a followup question or doing anything or saying anything that makes a smile go off a celebrity's face, Oprah is interviewing Lindsay Lohan in exchange for Lindsay agreeing to do a short reality series for OWN. Both the interview and the reality series will have no basis in reality. They will not show anything as it is in the life of Lindsay Lohan. Oprah will ask a question to Lindsay and accept whatever answer she gets because Oprah is the worst interviewer on the air since Larry King went off it. Atleast every once in awhile a morning show talking head is sick and some replacement asks a question before they are sent off to Fargo to do house duty at Josh Duhamel's mom's house waiting for him to come home once every two years so they can get a photo.

The thing is there will be tons of people who believe whatever answers Lindsay gives Oprah. If Oprah asks Lindsay if she has ever done drugs and Lindsay says once when I was 18, Oprah will just nod her head and move on. If Oprah doesn't challenge it, then it must be true right? The interview is a waste and all it will show is that these celebrity fluff pieces that Barbara Walters made famous pre-Oscar telecast still exist and that they have a torch bearer in Oprah. I don't understand why she would do it except for ratings. It is going to make Oprah look horrible because all of us who read tabloids will know Lindsay is lying and Oprah won't care.

I could go off all day about this interview. Oh, and as for the reality show, it is going to be a way for Dina to get the rest of the kids in front of the camera. Oh, and church. There will be church. Family meals. Lindsay speaking to a group of kids somewhere. If anyone watches this show for anything other than a quick look, it is as the principal in Billy Madison said, "Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul."

What I Hate

I have to admit that I rarely pay for concert tickets. Some people get discounts on store merchandise or free fries or some other perk in their job, and mine just happens to be that I don't usually pay for concert tickets. HOWEVER, that is not always the case, and the ones I do pay for, are usually the really mind blowing expensive ones. I remember on one of U2's tours a few years ago paying like $250 for a ticket from a scalper or ticket broker as they prefer to be called.

I bought the ticket a few days after tickets had gone on sale, so the concert was still months away, and I hadn't even really heard much about the show. When I did start hearing things, I heard that U2 wasn't playing more than two or three of their big hits, and were instead only playing songs from the past two albums or some nonsense. Yes, those two albums are and were great, but that is not the point.

I don't care how tired you are of playing your hits, or if you are trying to sell more albums, or you are trying to make your show fit one theme or style. We as fans are not paying hundreds of dollars per ticket so you can experiment. We want what we like and what we enjoy. You want to charge $15, you can play whatever the hell you want. You charge $500 for VIP seating, I better hear crap I know every word to.

Another favorite trick of musicians is to combine 4 or 5 of their hits into a medley. Again, this only works if you have 20 hits and can't possibly sing them all in the time allotted. Cool. But if you are doing it to give the old songs a rest, forget it. You might sing the same songs 50 times each tour, but we, your fans are only hearing them once. Yes, if you are Phish fans you are hearing them every night, but you don't remember what you heard the night before anyway so it doesn't matter.

Oh, and Dave Matthews, I love you, but if I hear another 40 minute version of one of your hits, I am going to storm the stage. At last count, Dave plays about five songs in a 2 hour set.

I bring all this up because I saw that Kylie Minogue is going to not play any of her big hits on her new tour. Now I don't give a rats ass about Kylie or her tour, but I'm sure there are hundreds of thousands of her fans who will be paying astronomical sums to see her, and they want to hear her hits. If an album doesn't sell well, it means that fans didn't like it, so why on earth would you charge a fortune to your fans and have them endure only songs from that album that sucked.

What I Hate

#1 I hate the fact that a 50 year old man needs to wear his jacket with one shoulder off because he's trying to act like he's 20.

#2 I hate the fact they are cold. Who the hell wears jackets and sweaters and long pants? In LA yesterday it was literally 4000 degrees. It was so hot yesterday snakes were sweating. Did the producers of the music video offer them some invisible air conditioner that follows behind them? Then why the hell are the bundled up against the cold? Skeletor and the thing that married him's assistant behind them is wearing a thin, sleeveless dress which was probably about right for the weather. Still looks a little uncomfortable, but better.

#3 I hate Marc Anthony's hair. It looks ridiculous and he just needs to face the fact that those two little cowlicks are not hiding the fact that he has a receding hairline that is halfway to the back of his head.

#4 I hate the fact that Marc Anthony is wearing that U2 shirt. It just seems wrong. The only song he probably knows is Sunday Bloody Sunday and not because it's famous, but because it's the first song on the album so he wanted to pretend he had listened to it.

#5 Is Marc Anthony that insecure that he always needs to be looking off at the people around him like he is going to kick their ass? The last ass he kicked was when...Actually I doubt Marc Anthony ever kicked an ass. He's kissed a lot of ass, sucked a lot of ass, is a big jackass, but I don't think he actually has ever kicked an ass.