Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Gwyneth Paltrow Needs To Shut It

You know the really sad thing about all of this Gwyneth Paltrow talk lately? She doesn't even have a movie she is promoting or anything. That means she just decided she wanted to get in all of our faces and tell us the world according to Gwyneth. No, not Garp. Although, I think John Lithgow dressed as a man is an improvement over Gwyneth sometimes. He wasn't Garp though was he? That movie was really good. I wonder how come the movie channels don't repeat the hell out of that movie. "I mean, I had mine surgically removed, but..."

Anyway, Gwyneth is interviewed in the new issue of Elle UK because, well she pretends she is from the UK and so they like her. Hell, I don't know why they did. They did get some great quotes from her though because one thing, she knows how to do well is say the wrong thing.

Let's take a look shall we? (Mr. Rogers hand waving you in)

'I just got out of sweatpants, out of mummy mode. I love fashion , but when you're breastfeeding and you're a stone-and-a-half overweight, it's demoralising to try to wear good clothes.'

I know that since this is a UK magazine they might have put in the stone and a half part instead of Gwyneth so I am not going to say anything about that, or even the mummy thing. I am going to give her a break to show I am kind and fair. What I am ticked off about is the fact that she says that she was 21 pounds overweight. (A stone equals 14 pounds) I don't think Gwyneth gained 21 pounds her entire pregnancy and by whatever time she went out you know she had lost most of it. In this quote she is referring to that black dress she wore to a premiere where she looked like she was walking the streets. Yeah, that one. So, I don't get her quote. What is she trying to say? That she lies about how overweight she was? That even if she weighed 21 pounds more than she does right now that she would still be in desperate need of a double-double from In-N-Out? I just always feel like she is trying to relate to the "everyday person" when she really has no clue about average anything and lives in her own world.

Except for one thing. This actually almost made me like her for the 5 seconds it took me to read the sentence. "Man, I wish smoking didn't kill you. I'd be smoking right now. I miss it." You know what? That is probably the most honest thing she has ever said in an interview at anytime.

She also says that when she is 70 she is going to start again and is counting down the days until that event. Hey, at least she has a retirement goal.

Now, the statement that confuses me the most is that she says that she and Chris Martin will NEVER walk a red carpet together because HE doesn't want them to be a public couple. Of course, this weekend they are going to walk the Grammy Red Carpet together so there goes that whole line of questions.


amster said...

Each time she opens her mouth, I like her less. The smoking comment is funny tho. I am surprised she let that little imperfection out of the bag.

jib said...

Garp was an awesome movie.

"No glove no love" - that line has stayed in my head for freaking decades now. Sound advice.

Gwennie is a tool. A self involved boring tool.

B626 said...

Another reason to anticipate cringing during her scenes in Iron Man 2...

stiffkittens said...

She's trying to blend in with us 'normal' folk again - hence going on and on about smoking etc.

Quotes from interview, copied from laineys site:

“(People believe) that I'm a goody two-shoes. I'm not. And that I'm a strict macrobiotic. I'm probably less square than people think.”

On her 'friend' Courtney Love:
“I don't think she's on Class A narcotics anymore. Maybe just Class C. That's no big deal - aren't we all, ha, ha, ha!”

"It doesn't behoove us to be a public couple. (My husband) certainly doesn't want to be that. We've never ever walked down a red carpet together, we never will. If people think that that means we're not together, then – ha ha ha! – so be it."

She tries too hard! Fail.

Molly said...

What I am ticked off about is the fact that she says that she was 21 pounds overweight.

she wasn't talking about herself, she was talking about common people.

what a dipshit.

Mooshki said...

'Garp' the book makes me cry so freakin' hard. *sniff* 'Prayer for Owen Meany' too. Double *sniff*

I think I like Gwyneth and Katherine Heigl because I have a phobia about saying stupid things in public, and every time they do, I feel less bad about myself. :)

Ror said...

Thankfully, this is the last post EVER on Gwenny from Ent.

Right, Ent? Huh? Purrdy puhleez? With an anthrax letter on top?

twunty mcslore said...

I second that, Ror. Now, will someone please tell me about In-n-Out burgers? Are they really that good?

jax said...

and did anyone see that bit about Coldplay last night?

Chris Martin won't be joining the band in studio for weeks for the new album and told them to start without him. he also told them Viva La Vida was good,but they can do better.
someone beleives their own hype.
fuck off Chris, you used to be such a rad guy, now you just suck you pompous prick.

shazzzba said...

She's an IDIOT !

Momster said...

That dress she's wearing on the cover is hideous. What is with the huge sleeves/shoulders?

equinox said...

actually she DOES have a bomb of a movie coming out. can't remember the name but with Joaquin and I doubt he is going to try to promote it, so she's trying her best.

Emma31 said...

Jax were was that bit about Coldplay?

sickle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sickle said...

isn't the bit about coldplay the fact that the producer BANNED chris martin from being in the studio during production so he wouldn't fuck with it?

Pink Skull said...

Twunty-In-n-Out burgers are really good, way fresher and tastier than McDonalds. It's not a life changing experience, but it is a damn good burger. Oh, and religious fundamentalists own the business, John 3:16 is written on the bottom of every cup at In-N-Out.

Mooshki said...

I heard they were going to walk the carpet separately at the Grammys.

Emma31 said...

Brian Eno the producer of"VIVA" said that about the album NOT chris Martin!!!

vitazza said...

I think that Chris isn’t in the studio yet because, they all record instrumentals and vocals separately...when Chris arrives they will lay down his tracks then mix...don't most bands do this?? Crap.... the Beatles even did this.
........and Fact yes Viva la Vida WAS good and they can do better ... why shouldn’t push themselves to the next level... I don't see self promotion in any of theses comments.
number three this is a gossip site why would you take anything said about Gwynnie seriously!! Who’s the tool?? She or We?
Keep it light folks! Peace!

Norah said...

ugh, i'm not picking up elle this month.

bionic bunny! said...

what? i never heard (or saw) that about in-n-out!
twunty, i'm pretty sure they put something addictive in the burgers. and the price is good. the fries are only so-so unless you eat them on the spot, but the burgers are a california tradition.
damn, it, i've been on medifast for over 3 weeks, and i'd just about kill for one right now!

shakey said...

I remember going to a hamburger place that was in a streetcar or subway car, something like that. The guy who served us thought we were from Sweden because of my blonde hair and our "funny accents".

I'm guessing an in'n'out double double is different from a Tim Horton's double double.

Majik said...

"I mean, I had mine surgically removed...."

"...but to have it bitten of in a buick? (shudder)".

I can quote that movie like I was in it, man.

When movie channels first came out in Canada back in the early 80's, there were only so many movies that they showed and I watched them over and over and over...The World According to Garp is still one of my faves. Porky's runs a close second.

Majik said...

That should be "bitten OFF".

Ayesha said...

As much as I can't stand her, I have the same plan to return to smoking when I'm 80. Or if I get a terminal illness.

trashtalker said...

Do you think she'll try to say she was misquoted again?

That blouse looks like a Mickey Mouse hat. Stupid fashion.


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