Tuesday, July 02, 2013

Random Photos Part Five

Rihanna celebrated Paris Fashion Week, by not wearing much at all. Her fashion statement.

Kristen Stewart went for the haute S&M look.
Vanessa Paradis looks like she has lost even more weight since the last time I saw a photo of her.
Not sure what look Jennifer Lawrence was going for here.
Somehow Julianne Hough got invited to Fashion Week.
Zuma seems a little embarrassed of Gwen Stefani's all denim ensemble.
Amber Heard doing some shopping in LA.
Hilaria Baldwin had some Tweeting to do so looked online for funerals. Chose a wake instead.
Meanwhile, her husband looked for some homosexuals to beat up and abuse.
And through it all, Alec's daughter just wanted the world to look at her. She is a model.

39 comments:

rll said...

Meow, bitchay

MM said...

Hilarious re: Hilaria.

hairydawg said...

Dear New Enty(ies), we don't want to hate, ridicule and scorn everyone.
Thank you.

Count Jerkula said...

This is one of the toughest ones EVER. In order of appearance there is:

RiRi: Hot, sexy, drugged up, total filthy slut, don't mind playin rough

KStew: Hot, young, pissy bitch looks like she needs a good smack and rough time, would say she hates it but seems to love to hate.

Paradis: Hot, can tolerate a drunken drugged up mess, she don't make the cut though.

JLaw: Hot, seems to be a cool betch, saw some twerkin potential in that Linings movie, neck deep in a couple money printing franchises.

Hough: Hot, dancer flexibility, lots of time bearding so barely used lady parts, probably actually hates sex.

Stefani: Pass

Heard: Hot, bi, has Depp so locked up (and probably every other dude she's been with) that it would be great to hit it and blow her off.

Hilaria: Not even close

Ireland: She don't make the cut here

It really boils down to RiRi, KStew, JLaw and Hough. Someone has to get knocked out, so here is the final list:

RiRi: She would certainly be the best one night party, as we have the same interests (drugs, booze, whores)

JLaw: If I did a list about marrying, she would be at the top. As it is, I may consider clipping the rubber with my thumbnail and hoping I knock her up so she would keep me.

KStew: No doubt Hough is better looking, but Hough has sympathetic, damaged hate in her, not "fuel angry sex" kinda hate. So she is off the list and I'm stuffing a sock in KStews mouth, breaking out the paddle and having fun.

Fijigrrl said...

Yeosh. What's up with Enty today?

hollywood dime said...

LMAOOO! I can't deal with who ever is writing this shit anymore! DO they like *anybody*?
Gwen looks cute.

Kelly said...

Love your list @Count. That made me laugh!

Count Jerkula said...

Thanks Reno. I was worried that it would be too involved and just get me on watch lists, so I am glad to know the humor came through.

Jessie said...

Yeah, less snark please.

surfer said...

FYI - that's Kingston, not Zuma. You know, in case you wanted the right info. ;)

parissucksliterally said...

That is Kingston, he dresses like a punk. That kid looks like the next Jaden Smith. Now, Zuma,on the other hand, looks like a funny, great kid!

auntliddy said...

If gwens kid is embarassed, he shld check the mirror. Kstew still looks like a crack ho. Why are we always seeing the explosive man- baldwin- every day? Hes really not that interesting, and wife, less so.

MadamChef said...

Kristin Stewart actually looks cool all cleaned up and haute (that's HAUTE, not HATE, EntyWoman). Fashion fail for JLaw, though. Is she still being dressed by Rachel Zoe?

“This wasn't just plain terrible, this was fancy terrible. This was terrible with raisins in it.” ~ Dorothy Parker

auntliddy said...

And! Im sick of ireland already!!!

Julie said...

love Kristen Stewart's look here! JLaw needs to fire her stylist.

Pini 27 said...

I don't get how Stefani doesn't get more flak over her kids. Who bleaches kid's hair like that? That is not a shade of blonde ever found in nature.

Jerkie, you do RiRi you'd better wear THREE condoms!

libby said...

I'll bet that Gwen is one of those parents who would have a tough time saying 'no' when her kid sees her bleaching her own hair and wants to do it too.
She's completely an 'it'll grow back' kinda mom, a California girl to the bone.
As long as it's the kid's idea (like with Shiloh and her 'Montenegro Style'), I like when parents let their kids look how they want. (Within reason, obvs.)

libby said...

(I should clarify that any parent who forces bleach on a kid's head should probably go to prison. imo)

Count Jerkula said...

@Pini27: It aint my problem if she catches something.

Pini 27 said...

Thank you for the snort/giggle Jerkie! Libby, you're probably right.

trainrides said...

And GLAAD actually forgave Alec Baldwin for his Twitter tirade. Hmm.

@Count That was a very impressive list. Your reasoning is very commendable.

car54 said...

The Baldwins got an apology for the tweeting at the funeral story and the paper took the story down.

His rant still isn't right, tho.

Anonymous said...

i love rihanna's look for some reason

Unknown said...

wahhhh i'm a model, too!! look at me!! i dont have a famous dad tho :'(

https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/1000697_10151544681825958_874849912_n.jpg

Count Jerkula said...

@Pini27: Hope all these other betches realize its a joke.

@TrainRides: Thanks. Has your pic come up in the user photos yet?

Jenn said...

That poor kid of Stefani's.

lostathome said...

All I want to say is Hilaria is a fucking pig.

Count Jerkula said...

Hello Ms.Basinger, nice to meet you.

Unknown said...

@ Pini27 @ Count J
Fun fact: Mark Wahlberg is paranoid about catching STDs and back in the day used to double bag it, AND change them a couple of times during sex because he was afraid of the condoms breaking. I know this because I know a girl who dated him for six months in the 90s.

Count Jerkula said...

F That. I bought extra strength rubbers once, hoping they would make me last longer for the first time with this chick I was seeing. After an hour of plowing, I took it off, put some clothes on and went to the vending machine in the hotel and bought some bobo rubbers. Smooth sailing after that.

If he that much of a germaphobe, I guess Marky Marky didn't do any dining at the Y, huh?

trainrides said...

@Count Yup. And I'm still devastated by the rejection. Still a fan of your humor though.

Count Jerkula said...

@trainrides: Where, which one?

Diana said...

@Count, I do not comment often. But your post had me rolling, and thinking, and seeing what you said! FUN! TY...

trainrides said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fluffy White Clouds said...

Love Kstew's outfit!

What happened to JLaw? Attacked by the pant monster. Or indecision...

@count I have no words you may have almost out done yourself today.

sparklynan said...

mean

NL said...

Count ~ way to show your work! Your comments beat the original post comments x100.

marie-ski said...

Pppppp

meltz911 said...

Shame on you enty, putting the Rihtard in the #1 spot,

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