No More Celebrity Rehab

If you are watching the current season of Celebrity Rehab you should make it last awhile, because there probably will not be any more seasons of the show. Probably a good thing. I tried to watch the first couple episodes and was trying to process the fact that Michael Lohan and Dr. Drew appear to be friends and that if you do enough heroin in your life, it is very tough to understand a word you are saying. Yes, I am talking to you Steven Adler. Do not even get me started on Bai Ling. This was probably not the best career move she ever made. Prior to the show people thought she was kooky which is good and still gets you roles and work. She does not come across well on the show at all.

Apparently the show will be no more because Dr. Drew has got some higher paying gigs coming his way so will leave the D listers and their problems to therapists who won't televise everything. If Dr. Drew crashes and burns on his other shows though he will be back to helping them.

Speaking Of Celebrity Rehab

I did not want to degrade the memory of Mike Starr by throwing him into the same post as that contribute nothing towards man kind Michaele Salahi, so I am saving my venom for her and the producers of Celebrity Rehab for this post. According to reports, Michaele was kicked off the show because she had no addiction. Well, I think I posted on here last week that I had no idea she was addicted to anything but fame and apparently I was right. I guess she could have been anorexic, but apparently that was not even the case. When it was discovered that she was on the show only to get some camera time and some publicity, producers fired her. Of course now there is going to be a lawsuit and more press for the Salahis.

Michaele's husband says there is going to be an expose on reality shows they are a part of which just shows they are only in anything to get more attention for themselves. Meanwhile, maybe her spot could have been taken by someone who really needed or needs help.

Mike Starr Has Died

Former Alice In Chains bassist, Mike Starr died yesterday in Utah. Mike was previously on Celebrity Rehab. I have not watched every season of the show and did not watch his entire season, but I think I remember one episode about him. Was he the guy on the show that towards the end of the season got to play a concert? It had been so long since he played and he was so nervous and I thought the guy was going to start using again right then and there. This shows that Celebrity Rehab should be still rehab. I don't think Mike did it for a paycheck, he did it because he wanted to get better. Now the show has become a parody of itself and I have beaten that horse to death. I wish that he could have recovered. He had so much talent and it is sad to see him gone.

Celebrity Rehab Is A Sham

When Celebrity Rehab first aired it was a great show. We got to see people who were full on addicts with a little name recognition go through the humbling process of recovery. It was great television and I had the feeling that every person on the show was there to get better and not to pick up a paycheck or fame.

Well, fast forward to this year and I look at the cast of Celebrity Rehab and I am wondering to myself what kind of addiction they have other than one for paychecks and cameras in their faces. Michael Lohan is on the show. Supposedly to deal with his anger management problems. Please. He has been going to anger management classes for years and it has not helped. He can probably wall paper his house with restraining orders. Bai Ling is going to be on the show. I guess she is addicted to being almost naked in front of cameras and thinks Dr. Drew can help.

The Salahis from Real Housewives are also going to be on the show. I didn't realize that having bad taste was something that could be cured in rehab. The rest of the cast are people you have probably never heard of except for Dwight Gooden. They are also the people who have real drug and addiction issues. The producers just do this so they can get enough people to fill out a cast. I also guarantee you that Michael will be in there telling the world how he is clean and sober and that all the cast should be listening to him. Uh huh.

I Will Trade You Tila Tequila For The Main Tiger Mistress

Dr. Drew did not get Lindsay Lohan. He did not get Mel Gibson. Heck he did not even get Dina Lohan and I thought if you waved a $50 bill in front of her face and six weeks of national television she would come panting. But, Dr. Drew did manage to get Jeremy London and Rachel Uchitel for his latest season of Celebrity Rehab. Tila Tequila, who was scheduled to be on the show is no longer. Apparently the fact that Dr. Drew was going to insist on clothes during the process was kind of a deal breaker.

So, instead he has a gaggle of people that should make for an interesting combination. Rachel is looking to make the transition from Celebrity Rehab to Celebrity Apprentice. That is a whole lot of celebrity for someone who seems to be famous solely for sleeping with Tiger Woods and then getting him to write a big check.

Jeremy London should be the fun one. I can't wait until he gets kidnapped again. Also on the show are: Jason Wahler, Janice Dickinson (I bet she and Jason hookup), Leif Garrett, Jason Davis and Frankie Lons, who is the mother of Keyshia Coles. I think she took the Dina spot. Oh, didn't Jeremy London and Rachel Uchitel once have a thing together?

Liza Says No And Jason Davis Says Yes To Celebrity Rehab

I wouldn't normally talk so much about Celebrity Rehab but I figured one more post wouldn't hurt. Liza Minnelli has officially turned down her chance to appear on Celebrity Rehab. If there was any chance at all of signing her up for the show, the producers should have given her everything she wanted. I doubt she would do it, but last night I was thinking about what her one on ones with Dr. Drew would be like and how she would probably start talking about her life and maybe breaking into song and doing a dance number. It definitely would have been on my must watch shows. Now, I will just wait for the end of the season marathon like I always do. 8 hours of pain.

Speaking of pain, Jason Davis has agreed to be on the show. He just got out of rehab, but probably could use some more. According to the NY Post, Jason celebrated 30 days of sobriety by asking his girlfriend to marry him. She actually said yes. I know, I know, someone better check to see if she needs rehab too because that is one brave woman.

A Show With No Cast

Usually in Hollywood you have a cast, a script and are ready to shoot your show but no network wants you. However, Celebrity Rehab has the opposite problem. Apparently everyone in LA is now clean and sober because Celebrity Rehab can't find anyone who wants to star in their show. No matter who they ask, the answer is always no.

The deadline is Wednesday. If no one says yes, then the show will not go on and Dr. Drew may cry. Here is what they need to do. Assume that everyone is a recovering addict and see if they can do better by just casting another season of Sober House. Honestly, it doesn't matter what it is called because the stars will all be a mess. But, the stars can feel better because they can say they are sober and just getting some after care.

Thank You VH-1 - Tom Sizemore Joins Up For Celebrity Rehab

Finally a reality show with some actual drama that won't need to be staged. Tom Sizemore has signed on to do the next season of Celebrity Rehab 3. Oh, and to make things incredibly fun, Heidi Fleiss has already signed on to do the show. Apparently when Tom showed up for shooting yesterday he was really messed up from withdrawals and had to be admitted into the hospital. Oh, and the first Heidi knew that Tom was going to be there was when he showed up. And VH-1 got it all on film!!

Oh this is going to be so good. I actually don't think they will be able to make it all the way through the show together. In a way it is a really bad idea because they pretty much bring each other down and he did go to jail for beating her so everyone will have to be extra careful about that.

The show will also have much bigger names than in the past. The list includes Mackenzie Phillips (One Day At A Time), Dennis Rodman, Mindy McCready (country music singer), Lisa D’Amato (America’s Next Top Model), Mike Starr (Alice in Chains), Kari Ann Peniche (ex-Miss United States Teen), and Joey Kovar (Real World Hollywood).

Mackenzie Phillips is one of my Facebook friends and honestly she seems to be pretty normal. She updates all of the time and they are generally coherent. She seems to watch a bunch of television. Who wants to bet that Mindy McReady has sex with Tom Sizemore and that Dennis Rodman hits on everyone male and female?

The show isn't going to be on the air for a few months which sucks. I want it now. Do it Big Brother style and have it available to us over the internet 24/7.