Tuesday, June 16, 2009

One Two Three - It's Pretty Simple


I don't care what country you are in or what language you speak, I think everyone knows that three fingers means the number 3. Kimberly Vlamnick is suing the tattoo artist who put 56 stars on her face when she says she only asked him for three. She says that because he is Romanian he didn't understand her. 'I think he didn’t understand what I wanted. He spoke only fractured English and French. 'But I explicitly said in my native tongue, French, and also in a little bit of English when he looked confused, that I wanted three little stars only near my left eye.'

She is now suing the tattoo artist. Umm. I don't care who you are, I think we can all pretty much agree that the guy figured out she wanted stars in whatever language they were using to communicate, and if she wasn't sure about whether he got the number right, all she needed to do was fingers, fingers, fingers. She claims she fell asleep during the procedure. Uh huh. How many of you are willing to bet that when you are getting a needle in your face for a few hours that you will probably stay awake until the procedure is finished. Also, to do three probably wouldn't have taken long enough for her to fall asleep anyway.

The tattoo artist says the girl was awake the entire time and often looked in the mirror to see how everything was proceeding. I think the shocking thing here is that she only paid about $80 for all of the stars. That seems like a pretty good deal to me. I think what happened is the girl was drunk and thought that 56 seemed like a great number of stars. She then sobered up the next morning and freaked the hell out that she looked like Mike Tyson and now is suing so she doesn't look like an idiot for asking for them in the first place. To remove them is going to cost about $15,000.

51 comments:

Nature Girl said...

No way in hell she didn't know exactly what was happening. When you have a tattoo needle on your chin bone, there's no way you're not awake. Silly girl.

__-__=__ said...

You're right - it was a great deal!

Kat said...

Clearly, she's not all there.

califblondy said...

Tattoos on the face are never a good idea. She's crazy if she thinks she's going to win that lawsuit. I'd hate to see what she looks like after having them removed.

Jen said...

her 56 stars are in the shape of the # 3!

Rocket Queen said...

Mendacity again!

and lol - good catch Jen!

SFG said...

Her chin, her nose...no WAY she slept through all that unless she was off her face drunk and then who knows what she said to Tattoo.

Harriet Hellfire said...

Hahahahahaha! I'm sorry but she deserved it. I love tattoos, but anyone can get a gun and call themselves a tattoo artist these days. If you're going to get a tattoo, find a reputable artist and shit like this won't happen. Many good artists won't even tattoo people's faces, especially if they are young and don't have a lot of other tattoos. 80 bucks for 56 stars should have been the first sign. Good tattoos are not cheap - and cheap tattoos are not good! Her second warning should have been when at some point in the conversation, it became clear that perhaps he didn't understand what she was asking for. Duh.

Harriet Hellfire said...

Hahahahaa again. In the other picture in the article, she is wearing a belt buckle that says "SEXY". LOLLERCOASTER.

Kristen S. said...

Not to mention that fact that when he started on star #4 she could have said "stop!". For fuck's sake.

figgy said...

...because just THREE stars on one's face looks really nice and classy.

J-Mo said...

I work at a crisis line and have had more than one caller whose distress stems from tattoos on their faces that seemed cool at one time. Sad when they change but the statement stays.

DNfromMN said...

Wow, a trigeminal nerve tattoo. That's gonna hurt to get removed.

figgy said...

I know a guy with tattoos all over his forehead. It's very, very hard to concentrate on a conversation with him, as you have to try soooo hard not to look at them. It's not like a scar--that you can't help. A tattoo? On your face? Hard to figure.

empyrios said...

What. A. Dummy.

AnonMom said...

what a dumbass.

nancer said...

wow, she must have been exhausted because we would also have to believe she fell asleep before he finished star #3, or she would have known he was starting star #4.
cuz if she'd been awake she would have said "HEY! what are you doing?' right?

jesus, i hate stupid people....who think everyone else is as stupid as they are.

Pookie said...

klassy!

asleep? seriously? get out.

annalise said...

looks pretty awesome for a day or two of fun. the stars r very symmetrical, i'm impressed. girl must have a high pain tolerance.

whole_lotto _luv said...

At least it was stars. Imagine if the guy thought she said "penises."

I'd never go get a tattoo alone. Couldn't she scrounge up just one friend to go with her, someone who would have stopped the guy?

She must have met this guy in a bar and went home with him. She paid him $80 for sex, passed out, and he got out the tattoo stuff instead of a ballpoint pen.

Marie Braden said...

Admittedly, I have no FACIAL tattoos, but I HAVE fallen asleep in the tattoo chair when getting work on my ankles and shoulders, so I suppose it is possible that she fell asleep (although I doubt it). However, the lesson I'd preach out of this would be: NEVER go to a tattoo artist who doesn't speak your language! The ones who DO speak your language are able enough to do as they please, why add a potential complication?

Carmen said...

well, it is completely possible to fall asleep while being tattooed. While it's rare, I have a good friend who totally is asleep 2 minutes into the work. Happens every time. She says she has no idea why it happens but it feels like narcolepsy. and no, she's not drunk - heh. Most tattoo artists in the US (reputable ones, that is) will not ink you unless you are sober.

Anyway, just my two cents. I do think that the girl is pretty stupid but that the tattoo artist is equally stupid.

*Miss_P* said...

omg what a total muppet
how anybody couldn't tell that they were getting more than three tattoos is beyond me
how she can honestly say she fell asleep and didn't know is a total joke
and there is no way on earth i would gat a tattoo on any part of my anatomy if i thought the tattoo artist didn't understand exactly what i wanted
muppet!

Sierraton said...

Hey, at least now the village idiot is clearly marked.

Eileenie McMeanie said...

I wonder if she read her horoscope before she went to sleep...maybe it was written in the stars...all 56 of them? I crack myself up!

Sexecution said...

When she returned home her father threatened to throw her out of the home - which is the rest of the story from what I've seen and she lied to him to save her ass. Tattoos are painful, tattoos on your face or on bone anywhere are very painful, a judge will never believe with all that work that she was asleep.

A young drunk kid with very black ink, which is common in Europe, that will leave scars on her face even with laser removal - she's disfigured for life either way. Alcohol and ink usually ends in tears from what I have seen.

Jenn said...

Yeah seriously - what did they do, put her under general anesthesia for the tattoos?? How do you seriously not know you are getting more than 3 "little" tattoos. On your face of all places! Mo-ron!

All jokes aside, it does look kind of cool. But not permanently. Maybe as a temporary tattoo thing. Or maybe she should just off and join the circus sideshow? ;) LOL

Christine said...

Her story is ridiculous and she is obviously regretful and can't take responsibility.

However, the best line of the article was from the psychologist: 'The trauma this girl must be feeling is indescribable. She feels like a circus freak - and no wonder, because she looks like one.'

Nice bedside manner, doc. Way to make her feel good about herself!

selenakyle said...

My tattoo on bone felt good...nice vibratory sensation with of course a little pain. But it was my wrist, not something on such a sensitive area as the face. Sheesh!

Harriett's right--who the eff calls themselves an artist that can't ink some bloody decent stars, for chrissakes?

Put a little refinement into the job, dude! Damn right she's mad. The work looks sucky!

selenakyle said...

Yeah,that noise and vibration on the jaw and cheekbone--no way she didn't know what was happening. It would chatter your teeth.

Unless she was absolutely wasted, which I believe is in turn completely against proper, ethical tattooing guidelines, correct me if I'm wrong.

So she could either have a huge case of buyer's remorse and making it up, or was passed out and the shop should be closed down.

M said...

Well, on the bright side, at least she'll match her driver's license photo for the rest of her life...

I wince in pain at the little dot he did directly under her left eye. Um, ouch! And did he give her an "earring" on her left ear lobe? Got to give him props for covering all the bases with the thing.

M said...

Or, maybe she needs to start practicing how to apply Dermablend to her face, daily, and blending effectively...

Ms Cool said...

AWESOME TATTOO! She needs some stripes on the other side.

ardleigh said...

So sleep in French means passed out drunk in English right?

Cause there is no way she wouldn't wake up when someone is applying a needle to your face or I'd be able to sleep at the dentist.

jazzence said...

They trace the outline first, and then ask you if this is the way you want the tattoo to look before a drop of ink is applied. She's a moron who thought it would be cool to have stars tattooed on her face. 3 or 56. It's still lame.

Charlie said...

I think the things on her earlobe & under her eye are moles. Now they blend in with her face's overall pattern!

She sounds like a bad liar. Most likely her parents were super pissed when she got home and is now trying to squeeze the tattoo artist for the $ it'll cost for the removal. Her face will never be the same. Her biggest problem is what's between her ears though. Muppet is right!!

Sara Bellum said...

Numbers are the same in every language, she could have written the number "3" and he would have understood. I'm calling shenanigans.

Judi said...

Moron.

ClaireFrasier said...

When I first saw the picture, I thought: "That would be fun to do for Halloween". (I'm thinking stick-on stars like a 1st-grader gets).

I may have to do this. With stickers, of course.

And, would you let someone you can't CLEARLY communicate with cut your hair? Much less come anywhere near you with a needle?

heyitsmerc said...

Come on! Are you kidding? This girl had to be skull cracked drunk when she got this done! How the hell do you not feel something being carved into your face with a friggin needle 56 times?

valerie said...

Why is it always the ugly ones who get tattoos on their face?

Rach said...

@jazzence: Agreed. I have 3 tattoos. The outline is put on first and then you check it. if you're still happy to go ahead then you get the tatt.

she's lying (duh)

nikki said...

I have more tattoos than i have open skin left. First off...facial tattoos? No thanks, but to each his own. Second, if this broad fell asleep she was on drugs or drunk, and she deserves it. I have NEVER in my life fell asleep during a tattoo. I have had some hurt less than others, but none are "soothing" and make me fall asleep. LOL that chick is a MORON!!!!!!! You get what you pay for, and I would never go to someone I couldn't understand or if they couldn't understand me. "Good tattoos aren't cheap, and cheap tattoos aren't good."

GoddessNow said...

She had to know. There's no way shr dod not know.,

Leah said...

Sierraton - Your comment was hilarious!

linnea said...

poor idiot girl... have a couple myself and i think the artist kind of deserved it too, though - you never ink someone who is drunk!

stiffkittens said...

jazzence - By how shitty they look, i'd wager that they were done freehand (and probably not even drawn on with pen first - they look that bad)...

Kat Von D is not a role model!

stiffkittens said...

Oh, and there was a better picture in the link:
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/17/article-1193384-056169CF000005DC-425_634x561.jpg

Commercial Agent said...

She should have gotten tears tatted on her face instead! "One for me and fifty-five more for my homies!"

Fozz said...

I read this on another website and the tattoo man also said that the girl was actually happy with the stars but it wasn't until her father saw and got mad that she suddenly panicked.

The story is passable minus the sleeping part. How can you fall asleep with a painful needle coloring your face? Lies.

Amanda said...

LOL @ Sierraton said...

Hey, at least now the village idiot is clearly marked.
1:00 PM

Completely agree. What a tool.