Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Paris Hilton Wants To Open Her Own Hotels


FOX News interviewed Paris Hilton recently. I'm guessing some guy lost a bet. Anyway, in the interview Paris had this to say.

“I've pretty much done all you can do, but my next project that I'd like to do is get more involved in real estate – just from being in the business and growing up in it my whole life, it's always something I've been interested in. And right now that I've done everything I’ve wanted to do, that would definitely be the next step, to open my own hotels.”

Umm, I will go on the record right now and say I would not even step foot in any hotel she owned. Can you imagine what they would look like? First of all there would be all her dogs and other animals running around because she would think of all the space and rooms as an excuse to acquire more. There would be no outside television channels. All you would be able to watch on tv would be reruns of The Simple Life, a loop of the video Stars Are Blind, and infomercials for Valtrex and all her perfumes.

There would be three elevators in the hotel. One for her, one for everyday people and one for whoever is dumb enough to pay for a room there. On the bright side I am sure that it would be a drug friendly hotel, offer amazing drink specials and if you got drunk enough then you would be able to ignore the "That's Hot" recoding which sounds off whenever you press a button or turn on a switch anywhere in the hotel or the murals of herself she had installed on every floor right next to the huge mirrors she had installed so she could look at herself.

23 comments:

jax said...

ok i will admit that Stars are Blind was catchy...but so is her crabs.

Carissa said...

Your just giving her ideas Enty!

Share said...

She dies (3x typo, and keeping it, fate lol) does* know that her sister, Nicky the one who actually seems semi normal and business savvy, tried and epically failed at being a hotelier?

jbdean_79 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Share said...

Well, if she is going through with this, then she damn well better have a free clinic in every hotel - hell maybe on every floor.

0 said...

The only hotel Paris is qualified to run is a roach motel.

RocketQueen said...

So by saying she's done "everything she wanted to do", she means: failing at singing, failing at acting, flashing her crotch for the world, driving drunk, refusing to pay for services including clothing and hair extensions, and selling herself as a prostitute? Yes, I suppose one might want to try something else.

Harriet Hellfire said...

Welcome to the Chateau Valtrex!

Mr Pink said...

I am still convinced that Ent puts up a piece with a picture he knows most of us will find irritating as the last thing before the random photos. He does this because this picture is on top much longer (usually there's a delay before RP starts). This way we have to look at this annoying picture and refresh it over and over.

That's my theory...you got a sick sense of humor Ent.

austinrob said...

Tas loca!

bionic bunny! said...

didn't she already say this, years ago?

Mooshki said...

I think you're right Mr. Pink!

Let me guess, the rooms will be rented by the hour?

MISCH said...

First she needs a fool to put up the money...

Robert said...

She'd have to call it a "HO-tel," right?

sunnyside1213 said...

Ok...guess I am just being picky today, but WTF is going on with her boobs. Did she get the Kidman special or is that just one hell of a wonder bra. (You can really get some cleavage with duct tape too.)

Oh, and by the way Paris, because of you, I will never stay at a Hilton again. I would rather sleep in a tent than a Hilton.

anarchi said...

That's Hot...el.

MCH said...

@Share, I did not know that about Nicky!

I think her great grandfather is ROLLING OVER in his grave at the thought of this prospect.

ardleigh said...

Enty her pets are sometimes left dead in a closet. I wouldn't want that as my "gift basket" when I checked in.


I wonder if the hotel would be
"pet friendly".

Mooshki said...

Sunnyside, she owns the Mercedes of bras. I think she hired a structural architect to design them.

kathrynnova said...

"I've done everything I wanted to do":

-expelled from school
-sex tape
-fake nose
-fake hair
-fake boobs
-paid escort for wealthy men around the world
-jail
-dated joe francis
-trademarked memorable quote "that's hot"
-released mediocre album
-starred in "the hottie and the nottie"
-became a household name synonymous with slut

among many other accomplishments.

Share said...

@ MCH - Yes, it was a few years ago and Nicky's hotels were supposed to be in Miami.

I think they were to be called Nicky O or some sh!t like that.

littleoleme said...

chick had a tit job.

reticulation said...

Oh, and everything will be pink or silver and glittery.