Friday, October 09, 2009

Ted C Blind Item

Let's get something straight right now: Yes, I often write Blind Vices that are fairly obvious; this one isn't. That's a pretty big clue. And so, too, is Slink-a-Rella Jiggle's rear end.

See, it's the main thing that got her beautifully bodied man, Dumbo Pecs, to ask her to marry him (her boobs sure didn't hurt, either). Well, that and the fact that Slink-a-Rella wasn't exactly actually Dumbo's first choice to be his wife. So Pec thought, Well, I do like Slinky's big ol' bottom, so why the hell not give this a try, huh?

Aren't men funny? They make life decisions based on the most interesting things, like the notion that Dumbo also felt marriage to Slinky would...

...help his career, which is the most stupidass thing I've ever heard.

What Dumbo wasn't really paying attention to (since he's not really great about heeding the advice of those he pays to give it to him) was the unavoidable fact that his career was doing, uh, doing quite nicely before he ever met Ms. Jiggle. And if anything, Dumbo's marriage to Slink-a-Rella has stalled his pro job, if only a bit.

Will Dumbo's day gig continue to sorta meander along, you think, until this kind of weirdo marriage of his suddenly busts up, as most of his friends think it will? And pretty messily, at that. Hard to say. And besides, a good pair of butt cheeks is hard to find in this town of starved women, so can't say I blame Mr. Pecs all that much.

And It Ain't: Beyoncé & Jay-Z, Kendra Wilkinson & Hank Baskett, Mariah Carey & Nick Cannon

54 comments:

Quintessential Southerner said...

khloe and that guy.

Caroline said...

The only other women I can think of who are known for their big beautiful booties are Jennifer Lopez and Kim Kardashian. Kim isn't married and I can't see Marc Anthony being described as Dumbo Pecs, which implies he's buff - which MA most certainly is not.

Cheryl said...

I think by telling us that this isn't obvious rules out Khloe K but she is the only one I can think of right now.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

I agree with Quintessential

Pookie said...

oooooh, Quint! i think you nailed it.

Dawn said...

Hello... ANYONE?!??!!?

Ice-T and Coco.

ruby jayne. said...

If it's obvious it isn't "Lost in translation"--- This is definitley Scarlett J. and Ryan Reynolds... not too mention the boobs and butt- she's got both

Tara said...

Ohh...Khloe and that guy...forgot about them. BUT, has his career really stalled since their "marriage"? It's not been that long.

For some reason I thought of ScarJo and Ryan, but she's known more for her top half than her bottom half. Hmmm....

Cheryl said...

Dawn's got it.

Tara said...

Ruby...great minds... :-)

Quintessential Southerner said...

dawn, good guess! i read somewhere that ice-t is henpecked although he tries to come across as hardcore.

pomme said...

Kloe K and her husband and the other woman is the black mum from "benjamin button"

Isabel said...

Ice-T and Coco are still together, right? I like the Scar Jo and Ryan Reynolds guess, myself.

Cancan said...

Khloe and Lamar Odom -- I think the clues are pointing us toward an interracial couple.

Theresa said...

My first thought was ScarJo & Ryan Reynolds. (For whatever that's worth...)

Ice Angel said...

My first thought was Ryan and Scarlett. Wasn't he engaged to Alanis Morrisette before her or something?

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

I don't think it's Ice T and Coco for numerous reasons, one being Ted said "pro" job, in addition to saying that the dude hooked up with the chick to advance his career. Firstly, stinking it up on SVU doesn't constitute a pro job, I would think more along the lines of a professional sports player. Secondly, who exactly is Coco? I only know her as T's wife, so I'm not sure how she could advance his career.

Ellen said...

I think Khloe & Lamar is too obvious. I think it is Scar Jo and Ryan Reynolds. I think Scarlett is very known for all her curves and they seemed to get married awfully fast.

Ice-T and CoCo is a great guess, too and that is my second choice, but I wonder if that choice might be a bit too obvious, too? When I looked her up, the first thing that came up was something about her backside!

Katie said...

i would say khloe and lamar bc the rumor was that he was going to propose to tariji (sp?) a few weeks before he met khloe. but how exactly has his "dayjob" as a basketball player faltered?

RocketQueen said...

I don't think Ice-T is very buff these days, either.
I'm going with Ryan & Scar-jo but for the little detail bothering me: Ryan has friends?! ;)

mngddess said...

The fist line says that it's not OBVIOUS - so I doubt it's Khloe (stupid spelling) and Lamar.

It could be Ice-T and Coco, but Scarlett and Ryan is a good guess, too...

Roamer said...

Finally one I can solve!! this is Scarlett and Ryan. The clue here is that Ryan's first choice as a wife was Alanis! they were engaged remember?

MizCaramel said...

what about Jennifer Hudson and her man? She's the first that came to mind and I'm a huge fan of J-Hud's so I hope I'm wrong.

shakey said...

Maybe Ted is trying to throw everyone off the Khloé and Lamaar express because it really is them.

But Slink-a-Rella Jiggle kind of goes with Scarlet Johanson. And wasn't there something about Ryan being a no-show at Comic-con (or whatever it's called) because they had a huge argument? She showed for Iron Man 2, he didn't for Green Lantern? Pissed off the studio.

Nosey Parker said...

Adding something new to the mix =]

Fergie and Josh Duhamel

warmislandsun said...

This totally fits Scarlett and Ryan.

warmislandsun said...

This totally fits Scarlett and Ryan.

brooklyn040204 said...

Slink a Rella Jiggle has the same initials as ScarJo, so that would make sense, but on the other hand would that make it too obvious? I don't know who else it could be though, ScarJo and Ryan Reynolds makes the most sense here.

Carolyn said...

Fergie and Josh Duhamel?

Nosey Parker said...

Dumbo's marriage to Slink-a-Rella has stalled his pro job -
I'm wrong, this can't be Fergie and Josh. I just thought Duhamel sounded a bit like Dumbo.

I agree with Scar Jo and Ryan.

Isabel said...

Also, "beautifully bodied man?" Ryan Reynolds has one of the best bodies in Hollywood. One thing that bothers me though is Scar Jo recently lost quite a bit of weight and she's looking less curvaceous as before.

Audrey said...

On an unrelated note, wasn't there a blind on here about two actresses working together that "got together"? I'm too lazy to look it up, but I just saw this article on Jezebel and am thinking Drew and Ellen are the answer to that blind item: http://jezebel.com/5376165/marie-claire-drew--ellen-are-dating

sunnyside1213 said...

1 Ryan dumped Alanis
2 Scarjo didn't want to get married for a long time. Ryan really put the screws to her to make it happen.

I am with the Fergie Duhamel guess.

littlemanwhatnow said...

I am with the Fergie Duhamel guess too...wasnt there a bling about duhamel sleeping with megan fox on the set of transformers (at least that's what everyone thought)

Tizzy said...

I'm throwing in with ScarJo & RyRey! LOL.

chopchop said...

I am LMAO over those who apparently think Ice-T is a "beautifully bodied man"!

sunnyside1213 said...

Wasn't Megan Fox the one from a franchise who got pg with another married actor on the movie? And an abortion was the result, because it was a franchise?

Girly said...

fergie has no a$$


put me down for sj and rr

Missjenny619 said...

Why wouldn't Ryan want to marry Scarlett? She is one of the most sought after and sultry ladies in Hollywood. Men would throw themselves into a flaming pit just to be with her. She can have anyone she wants.

I doubt it's them.

Funny Girl said...

Has to be Khloe and Lamar Odom. Not sure who else would fit with the whole "butt cheeks" thing (Kim Kardashian is known for a big butt).

I don't think it could be ScarJo and Ryan Reynolds-- with Green Lantern and Deadpool movies in the queue, I don't think Ryan's career could possibly be considered to have "stalled". Even if one project ends up being sidelined due to scheduling issues, having a starring role in a major comic movie is not "meander[ing] along".

Anonymous said...

eva longoria and tony parker

Anonymous said...

Ice T talks awful about Coco. He tells her to get down on her knees and give him a blow job while his friends are there. He treats her like shit.

Nosey Parker said...

Changed my mind again. I think it is Josh and Fergie.

The ‘Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen’ actor – who tied the knot with the Black Eyed Peas star in January – can’t get enough of the sexy singer’s shapely rear.

When asked by Women’s Health magazine to name the "hottest part of a woman's body," he enthusiastically said: "Personally, I like the a**!”

http://thebosh.com/archives/2009/07/josh_duhamel_loves_his_wife_fergies_butt.php

Pandora said...

Scarjo & Ryan.

Isn't he a supporter of The Elephant Project? i.e. 'Dumbo Pecs'? Rest of the clues fit, too.

ea73 said...

Ashton and Demi

Anonymous said...

my friends own a coffee bar in nashville, and they r always telling us...

1) keith urban's body is hot, amazing pecs

2) but poor ku seems kinda "dumb"

3) and seems to have quite an appreciation for kidman's ass, always touching it


Personally, I don't see it - beauty def in the eye of the beholder... or beholden :)

Domonique said...

LOL

Where is Eva Longoria's ass? In her pocket?

ScarJo has lost a ton of weight, so has JBiel

They were both bootylicious but not anymore...

I think its Khloe b/c Lamar is Dumbo reincarnate

And in his pea-sized brain, after being a multi-millionaire LA Laker, it's been said that he's using her for an introduction into the limelight

Only thing is, Khloe is thick but she doesn't have cakes like Kim, but these are Hollywood standards so who knows?

Definitely a "weirdo marriage" and there are many naysayers...

Claudia Jordan for the woman he initially had plans on marrying(she alluded to it on her radio show with Jamie Foxx)

Just my guess...

Anonymous said...

Its def Khloe and Lamar Odom. He only married her because she's a Khardasian. She married him for attention. He was dating Tarraj (sp) P. Henson before her, and also has a baby momma of his two kids he was with for 10 years. He's a real piece of work.

Domonique said...

Everyone says its Taraji but he actually dated Claudia Jordan post Taraji and pre-Khloe(2 wks to be exact)

He is a shithead

Anonymous said...

Kanye West and Amber Rose.

Lynn said...

I do not think it's Fergie and Josh. First of all, Josh was with Fegie for like 4 years before proposing and his career has not stalled, he has done three movies this year and has another one coming up to start filming with Katie Holmes and Liv Tyler.

Also, Ted has commented that they are the 'real thing' and just last week said that Josh had been a blind item in the past but Fergie made an "honest woman out of him".

Also, I doubt Josh wanted to marry Megan Fox, maybe do her, but not marry her! And he was with Fergie for years before meeting Megan

Anonymous said...

I don't think it's Ryan and Scarlett, because his career hasn't stalled one bit since they married.

He had a huge success with the Proposal and Wolverine and he has a lot of new hot proyects: green lantern, deadpool, buried and variety reports that dreamWorks is eyeing Reynolds to star in a new movie Motorcade.

Christyn said...

scar jo and ryan reynolds hands down

maryja said...

I'm also thinking ScarJo & Ryan. From the "It Aint's" clues, the women in each of the pairs are, arguably, more famous than their partner. ScarJo is definitely the big star in that family.