Friday, June 03, 2011

Sean Penn And Scarlett Johansson Split


Apparently one month of seeing only one woman was way too long for Sean Penn has he and Scarlett Johansson have split. So, basically the relationship consisted of a couple of quick trips, frequent sex and even more frequent chain smoking. There were rumors of them moving in together, Scarlett trying to get pregnant and how Scarlett was suddenly in love with the idea of traveling to Haiti and getting involved in the process there.

That last little tidbit was probably what caused this whole thing to end. Sure, the Russian hookers Sean kept calling his poker buddies probably hurt too, but Scarlett thought Sean was actually kidding about going to Haiti and doing work. She thought it was fake and for publicity, like her smile. The only thing Scarlett cares about is Scarlett.

26 comments:

Ida Blankenship said...

ScarJo looks SO much like January Jones in that picture. It's weird.

She truly does strike me as a massive megabitch, but if she initiated this split, then good for her. I think the whole planet knows how she could do much better.

I've definitely got more respect for women who end things with philanderers than the ones who turn a blind eye and suck it up. ScarJo could have become another Diaz or Biel. I guess she's got some self-respect. Who knew?!

And thanks to Michael K, I'll always think Sean has a German Shepherd's face. SUPERfug.

__-__=__ said...

I could go down to Haiti and "get involved with the process" but I think I'd want to come home after a couple weeks at most!

BlisterPlease said...

NOOOOO! And I was so looking forward to their storybook wedding.

Another dream dashed.

bluebonnetmom said...

Where do you go to get a whole body disinfection after screwing Sean? He is probably just as nasty as Sheen, just better at hiding it. EEEWWW.

jbdean_79 said...
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RocketQueen said...

Seriously, Enty? You're team PENN on this one? Give me a break. If anyone initiated the split it was him. Talk of pregnancy (honestly, I thought she was pregnant?!) must have been what made him bolt. The only one Penn cares about is Penn. Scarlett seemed really, stupidly into him. She was literally glowing.

MISCH said...

Since they probably both have the same STD...well Sean probably has more than one...
But I recommend she gets to the Doctor FAST...

valerie said...

In Sean Penn's mind, this was a quick bonking session.

In Scarlett Johanssen's mind, this was a serious relationship.

This sounds like a classic case of boy just wants to have fun; girl is pushing too hard for a relationship; boy breaks up with girl because he thinks she's a psycho for moving too fast.

Audrey said...

There is no new information in this post. I can't believe that "Enty" didn't even say anything about Penn in Cannes with a bunch of prostitutes. It used to be the case that Enty would provide NEW information you can't get anywhere else...or at least something snark-worthy. Check out Celebitchy for more info and details.

jax said...

Audrey did you read the last paragraph?

Ida Blankenship said...

@Aubrey -- "Check out Celebitchy for more info and details."

Yes -- "info and details" blatantly nabbed and plagiarized from other gossip sites. Like this one, for instance.

Sorry, but celebitchy offers NOTHING new to the world of gossip.

Audrey said...
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canadachick said...

i'm guessing he said NO you're not coming to Cannes with me and walking the carpet with brangelina and she freaked so he dumped her. *at least that's how it went down in my head :)

Audrey said...

@ Jax - yes, there is the comment about Russian hookers, but not specifically when in Cannes. Maybe I'm being too critical.

@ Ida - true, celebitchy does not have any insider information just like the new CDAN, I guess! At least they wrote more about the fun in Cannes...

The Nightmare Child said...

What Rocket Queen said.

Jessica said...

Sean Penn spends less time in Haiti than some Haitians, so yes, it *is* all about publicity for him. He only shows up down there when there is a camera around.

Layna Day said...

They broke up? I'm devastated! NOT!

BigMama said...

@Ida - never heard the sheppherd comparison....dead on

She has never impressed me much. I can't get past the fact that her voice sounds so weird to me.

__-__=__ said...

bluebonnetmom - I would only do it wearing a full body condom.

Leslie A said...

Ugh. Thank God. What a horrible, self-absorbed couple.

I always feel like I need a shower after reading about Sean Penn-I can only imagine what someone what need after dating him for a month.

Jeri said...

Shouldn't Sean still be in Haiti. I thought he made a big stink about staying until everything was fixed.

Scarletts lucky to have got away unscathed. Hope it is over for her sake.

Is that really a wig on his head?

JasonBlueEyes said...

@Ida - Yes, but Celebitchy has photos of dongs every Friday.

DONGS, Woman!!! DONGS!!!!

(FYI - I'm Totally not into dongs.)

Ida Blankenship said...

@Jason -- Celebitchy TOTALLY ganked that dong idea from Enty!! And Enty actually SHOWED US PEEN each Friday. Doesn't Kaiser just put up pictures of supposedly hot men? And then all the morons fight with each other in the comments over which man is the hottest? *yaaaawn*

Long live Full Frontal Friday. *sniff!*

feraltart said...

Yes Ida, let's bring Full Frontal Friday back!

Did you read that Enty, we're gonna fight for our right to perve.

MCH said...

LOL @feraltart ;)

I was watching an old episode of "No Reservations" (Anthony Bourdain) when he was in Haiti and a few minutes into the episode, who should appear but Penn. I know everyone says he does it all for publicity but to actually see him there, made me like him a smidge more. I can't imagine there are a lot of celebrities who would want to be down there. Someone who knows more can feel free to correct me.

As for Scarlett, anyone after Penn will be a step up.

The Black Cat said...

I guess this answers the blind about a half of a famous celebrity couple who was with a woman he didn't know the name in Cannes but who admitted she was good in bed.