Thursday, October 21, 2010

Tyler Perry And Oprah


Did you watch Oprah yesterday? Tyler Perry was on and discussed all of the sexual and physical abuse he suffered as a child. It was unreal. I am amazed that he has overcome everything he went through to become who he is today and to me he is someone who should be admired for discussing what happened, how he deals with triggers from those events and how he has overcome. He is an inspiration.

When he was 10, he was sexually molested by the mother of his friend. "I hear arguing from the living room, she comes in... We were in the bedroom. She throws him in the bathroom and says, 'You need to take a bath and go to bed,' and she tells me to go home, and I go to the door to try and unlock the door... and I couldn't unlock it. She lays on the sofa and spreads her legs - I didn't know she was wearing lingerie at the time - and I said, 'I have to go home...' And she lights a cigarette and she takes the key... and I come over to get it and she puts it inside of herself (vagina) and she tells me to get it, so I get the key but I feel my body betraying me...because I felt an erection. She pulled me on top of her and I was inside of her, so my first sexual experience with a woman...that was it."

Later he talked about how that experience came up again later in life.

"I was so awkward...I didn't know there were these triggers...I was with this girl and we were about to get into it (have sex) and she locks the door - click, click, click - I wasn't able to make the connection, so she's wondering what is wrong with me; I'm wondering what is wrong with me...I could not perform. I went from being stimulated and ready to go to not being able to perform. There is this next situation, where I'm with another woman that I really, really cared about...and she comes in the room, one day sex is great, the next day lingerie...it's, 'What is this?' And I never made the connection to this."

He also was molested by a man who out his hand down Tyler's pants. Tyler talked about his dad beating him with a vacuum cord and how once he blacked out for three days because of the abuse.

20 comments:

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Poor Tyler Perry. It's nice when people take bad shit in their lives and use it to make themselves better, not worse. Good for him for having the sense and drive to not be a statistic.

RocketQueen said...

Jesus. Sounds like he's done some serious therapy work. I hope he's separately gone to the police and named names.

timebob said...

It breaks my heart to think how sick people are to abuse and sexually molest a child. They are so innocent and how evil one must be to take pleasure in corrupting that innoncence.

parissucksliterally said...

totally heartbreaking.

Anyone who abuses a child in any way should be drawn and quartered.

sandman said...

wonder what the triggers are for all the unfunny movies & tv?

Melody the First said...

He's a courageous human being. It took guts to get up there and admit all that.

Maja. With a J. said...

I find the most fascinating part of it all is that he has forgiven his father...even though his father is still abusive to him, if "only" verbally. His dad lives in a big house and gets money from Tyler every month. I think that is the key to be able to move on from something so traumatic - to be able to forgive. Must be so hard to do...

Chrissy Buns said...

wow. just wow. bravo to him for moving on from those experiences and becoming a functioning member of society! so many people just shut down and can never come back. good for him :)

awesome balla. said...

it was a really intense interview. im just not so sure that i would be able to discuss such personal things like that with my friend on my tv show, if i were oprah. but i understand that, for him, it probably was a comfortable arena with someone that he trusted, if the time was right for him to discuss this.

and i cant lie, i found the most suprising part of the interview was him discussing being heterosexual. never would have guessed. nothing to do with abuse, i didnt know about it prior, i just kinda got a ping from him.

Jamie's Girl said...

Was he really in a coma for 3 days on the floor?

timebob said...

@bella there is a lot of speculation over his sexuality. He claims he is straight and was even engaged for awhile. But he gives off a very gay vibe.

Lady J said...

@Jamie Girl

he wasn't in a coma he just blacked out. He doesn't remember what happened because the abuse that day was intense.

I watched the interview yesterday, and I have to say that I give A LOT of respect to Tyler for openly admitting to being both physically and sexually abused. It happens to lots of people who are afraid to open up about it. His story could help someone confront what is happening to them or tell someone about what they are going through. The abuse that he endured is unreal, and I would never wish that on any child. He said it took him A LONG time to come to grips with what happened to him but he said a big part of it was forgiveness. Being able to forgive allowed him to let go and move on.

kimmypie1 said...

I don't get the key part. Can you lock a door from the inside with a key?

bubs said...

Yes @kimmypie1 all of the locks on my doors have to be unlocked with a key from the inside (no deadbolts). I don't know why but some of the older houses have these types of locks.

I was also shocked to hear he supports his Father. After all of this, Tyler bought his Dad a huge house and supports him financially. When Tyler tried to reconcile any remorse from his Father his Father said, "If I had beaten you one more time you could have been Obama." Unbelievable.

kimmypie1 said...

Thanks Bubs, I have never seen a house like that so I was really confused.

MCH said...

Wow, that did take a lot of guts to admit that. Good for him for speaking out. Its nice to hear that someone that went through all that hell has been able to rise above it & become super successful.

Christina Penn said...

Tyler Perry's dad reminds me of Marvin Gaye's dad. Let's hope he doesn't follow the same path.

lanasyogamama said...

What a brave man.

fester said...

So he can discuss intimate details of his childhood but is still fronting about being gay? WTF? SMH.

Sadie said...

I DVR'd this and watched it last night. Very heavy show. Tyler went through hell and back and managed to not only survive, but thrive.
His sexual orientation is irrelevant to who he is today. And really, who cares?

I too was shocked that he supports his father. I think it makes him the "bigger" man by doing so.
It was hard hearing about all the abuse he suffered, but what was the most heartbreaking to see was that he couldn't look at a photo of himself as a child without tearing up. That is SO sad.

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