Monday, November 05, 2018

Today's Blind Items - Dancing Boy Foreword

Epigraph

The only wisdom we can hope to acquire
Is the wisdom of humility: humility is endless.

The houses are all gone under the sea.

The dancers are all done under the hill.

            TS Eliot, “East Coker,” The Four Quartets

Foreword

I'll make this short, not least because it is just after 5am on the third Saturday of duck hunting season, and I have better things to do. The dancing boy called me last night, you see, to write a foreword for the expanded version of his forthcoming docu-drama, “The Dancing Boys of Hollywood,” knowing full well I wouldn't have time to properly consider his request, or even read the script. So, I'm giving him what he deserves, just now, which is very little.

But none of it surprises me. I first met him close to 40 years ago during the production of a holiday pageant wherein he played the little drummer boy. It was, by his own telling, his first and last good childhood experience with show biz. Even then, at 7, he was lazy, showy, and overly-sensitive to criticism. Also, he was late, always, always late.

Still, I agreed to say something polite about his story, not least because much of it is true. First, he asked politely, which usually helps. Second, he showed me his current draft of “The Dancing Boy: A Hollywood Story.” It appears he'll be playing a fictionalized version of myself, his mentor, a brash, outspoken Hollywood conservative and writer who is also one of the good guys.

Third, and this part is really a shot in the dark. The dancing boy and I share a love of booze, drugs, women, and fast cars – okay two or three of those things. And every time he gives me a script to read I scribble the words “rat trap” (ie p.o.s.) on the title page, the sort of hot rod so hastily assembled at the last minute, and so jury-rigged together, it was going to take the full grace of God for it to even make it to the street race, let alone win.

But I keep going back to my one caveat. Back when I got started, it was all rat traps. The picture was either going to succeed and make a fortune, or crash the studio. And if the wind is just right, and the angels on his side, maybe, just maybe, his Hollywood dreams will only have been delayed, not denied.

                                                                                                                                                             J*** M*****
                                                                                                                                                             2 November, 2018

46 comments:

Pop Pop said...

You guessed it, Frank Stallone.

yepthatsme said...

If Grizzly bear and Polar bear fought, who will win? I have been thinking all day and yet cannot solve this mystery! Any insights o the learned pupils of house CDAN?

Cassie said...

Joseph Michael Straczynski as JM?

Anonymous said...

polar bear for sure.

Krab said...

Polar bears are bigger and meaner.

MDAnderson said...

Polar Bear

Florin said...

@Cassie: If JM is a Hollywood conservative, I'm not sure that's JMS. He's pretty darn liberal.

Post Cards From The Edge said...

oh I get it now. The Himmms were so pissed off at readers about what went down, instead of just disappearing like we thought they decided to TROLL all of us with these "dancing boys" blinds.

Cassie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Cassie said...

@ Florin Thanks, I missed that part. I retract my guess... :)

AlleyKat said...

Totally the polar bear

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I just really don't care

yepthatsme said...

But I heard the Girzzly although being smaller is more aggressive and meaner! Anyways thanks for your answers, now i am off to research who wins in a fight between a Siberian Tiger and a Polar Bear!

Satan 666 said...

Polar Bear, hands (or paws?) down. They are a lot bigger.

OB said...

I don't understand this at all

Elle said...

Me either :( Can someone ELI5 ??

InkBlot said...

Yep -- this guy says grizzly. http://www.compareanimal.com/2014/08/compare-polar-bear-vs-grizzly-bear.html

I'd think I'd go with polar, though, as they are significantly bigger.

Hope this helps.

Krab said...

I cannot for the life of me think of a Hollywood conservative producer or writer whose initials/name is "J*** M*****"

yepthatsme said...

One of the reasons many experts think Grizzly might win is that Grizzly bears take down faster prey as compared to Polar bears and also they are short tempered as compared to polar bears, but polar bears have a significant size advantage!

Glitter said...

Gawd, Enty. You use a Dancing Boy blind for the main blind of the day? What a disappointment.

Anonymous said...

What about those Grizzly/Kodiak Bear and Polar Bear hybrids? They've been mating together and I can imagine their offspring would be pretty impressive in a fight.

plot said...

Oh definitely Kodiaks win! They are killing machines.

Ever see Grizzly Man?

yepthatsme said...

I saw a documentary on a hybrid of lion and tiger, called liger and all the experts agreed that if left in the wild it would either starve or be killed, thats why hybrids might not be as deadly as their parents! But if it is happening naturally then who knows!

Village Guru said...

Just a writer and outspoken conservative? Given the initials he left, I would guess is first name is Jack or John.

Given that I think it could be John Milius, age 73, writer/director/producer. He's the right age for meeting DB almost 40 years ago.

Ksmith said...

And he is also a hunter!

Unknown said...

JM. J Bullock

Poppymann said...

Who would eat the dancing boy fastest? Grizzly bear, Polar bear, ot the three little pigs?

Anonymous said...

There is no second point. Need to lay off the booze, JM.

plot said...

Interesting question, Poppyman. I envision DB is somewhat like Andy Dick. So which predator would take Andy down fastest and render him silent?

yepthatsme said...

I would suggest Tiger will take him down fastest, coz I know of a Tiger which killed a 14 foot crocodile.

Guesser said...

Good guess,@Village Guru.

Rosie riveter said...

that grizzly whisperer got ate up live on camera for us all to see Haha Haha that just couldnt of been scripted better. Nature got him right out the gene pool

plot said...

Yeah, too bad the crazy grizzly dude put his girlfriend in danger too. She got et up as well, after telling her man that a certain new bear was acting predatory and she was scared.

Such a weird and painful documentary. Nature isn't Disney folks.

Sara, Making It Work said...

Not having the time to look this up right now, I'll go with your answer, @village guru!

FA said...

Does this finally mean the end of the Dancing Boy blinds? A grateful nation eagerly awaits.

Unknown said...

Bryan Singer?

Shaddup Mimsey said...

We were robbed’

Shaddup Mimsey said...

What about a grizzly bear AND a polar bear against Mike Ditka?

Unknown said...

Post Cards From The Edge, what happened with those guys anyway? Was it those long, excruciating stories that turned people off?

"I'll make this short, not least because it is just after 5am on the third Saturday of duck hunting season, and I have better things to do."

So this is the clue that will lead us to the next part of the ARG? Or is it just a red herring?

"The dancing boy and I share a love of booze, drugs, women, and fast cars – okay two or three of those things."

If we guess right do we get the next clue? I'm going to guess women. But then how do I break the code?

anna maus said...

Are y'all talking about grizzlys and polar bears the way you talk about lunch during the DB blinds? Or have I totally missed something.

Kimberley said...

That seems to be so, Anna Mouse. I too favour the polar bear against the grizzly, not just because of size but polar bears are also highly intelligent.

Unknown said...

John Milius

Guest777 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Guest777 said...

Jack Marino. Friends of Abe..spelled name wrong, sorry for delete

anna maus said...

@Kimberley - think I prefer polar bears too.

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