Wednesday, October 07, 2009

The Bean Goes After Ali Lohan


Frances Bean Cobain is one of my favorite celebrity children. To apparently be as normal as she is with the kind of upbringing she has had astonishes me. If any child has a ready made excuse for being f**ked up it is the Bean, but with the exception of a Twitter rant she leveled against Ali Lohan, she has stayed out of the limelight and just led her life as the parent to her mom. Maybe that is why she is normal. There had to be someone normal in the family. I feel sorry for her because she has had to probably be the mom in the relationship with her own mother and at some point you feel like she would love to just let loose, and maybe this rant at Ali is just what she needed to vent.

The Bean says she has never met Ali, but that doesn't stop her from saying what she thinks about Ali and her attempts at becoming famous. Spelling mistakes aside, it is much more lucid than most of her mother's ramblings.

"This is my open letter to Ali Lohan. Your not entitled to anything simply because your sister has a recognizable name. Your idea of fame isn't fame. It's infamy. You want to be famous? Work you're a*s off and make decisions that could potentially catapult your career into a lasting one. Notariety for who you are and notaritey for the work you produce are two completely differnt things.

I understand that you have been brought up in an envirtoment where the idea of fame is easily achievable but, that's not an excuse. You lack the talent, social understanding and credibility to be anything other then infamous. Your careere choices, thus far, will transcend a future career as someone who attempted to be famous, but never quite achieved it.

People like You ali lohan are rendering the world of true talent by attempting to make your entitled a*s noticed. How is this fair to the people who HAVE artistic integrity, or a mind?

I would rather die a most painful death the be assoicated with the kind of careere your trying to make for your self."

The word of The Bean.

45 comments:

MISCH said...

OH BEAN, I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND...BUT BE SMART...KEEP OUT OF IT..

Kara said...

I thought she was very articulate if a little spelling challenged.

Unknown said...

You go girl, that was awesome. I agree with Enty, it's truly amazing that this girl has turned out the way she has. Now, if we could just copy that and change the "Ali Lohan" to Rachel Bilson (and probably 100 others as well)and send that out, that would be great, lol.

canadachick said...

clap clap clap.....couldn't have said it better myself.

Linnea said...

But why Ali??? I dont get it, there are so many other people...

ItsJustMe said...

Way to go, Frances. What a level-headed kid. I'm sure she's been through a lot considering her mom, but it looks like she's a shining star.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Frances farmer will have her revenge on...hollywood. I love it

Unknown said...

The girl is a total hoot and a sharp cookie. Well worth following on Twitter.

Ms Cool said...

She is right on but why is she addressing it? She should stay out as shazzzba said, or go to town on Ali's sister, the Simpsons, the Hiltons, the Kardashians, the Gosselins, and Katherine Heigl.

karen said...

What makes you people think she's normal? Just because she stays out of the limelight doesn't have to mean that she's not as fucked up as Ali already.
Frances Bean is a little arrogant bitch.
Okay, I give her that she's smart enough to immediately delete all of her crazy tweets so that hardly anyone has proof of her being her mother's daughter, but she is constantly patronizing other girls on Twitter and in a way she does the same thing she accuses Ali of doing.
She tries to achieve e-fame by bragging about what rockstars she is friends with and uses every minute of her time to rub it under the noses of same-aged girls who are fans of so-called rockstars.
She's an annoying, arrogant, spoilt brat and will most likely end up like her batshit crazy mother. A useless attention whore whose crazy rants nobody gives a fuck about.
Kurt would be so proud.

BigMama said...

Wow Mina....you sound a bit, oh I don't know...bitter? Gosh, has she beat up on someone you know?

I agree she should probably stay out of it. However, since it looks like no one else is addressing the issue of how fast little Ali is going the way of her sister, least of all mom and dad, I can see the urge to comment must be overwhelming to a peer.

Christine! said...

^^^why not tell us how you really feel, haha!

I feel sorry for the girl, having the lineage she does..but I'll bet she is like any other teenage girl, getting catty with her friends. Didnt you?

I found it funny!

Cheryl said...

I'm with those of you who think she should keep out of it. She is of course entitled to an opinion, and Ali is a good target but it accomplishes nothing. She should lay low and avoid the whole Hollywood thing as much as possible.

Speaking of people attempting to be famous with recognizable names, the last time I saw Bean she was hanging out with one of the Willis girls at a party.

califblondy said...

If she doesn't know Ali personally, why is she going after to her like this? Like someone else said, there are lots of other twits doing the same thing. Why single out Ali?

I used to think somehow this poor child would be okay, but I'm not so sure.

Miranda said...

I don't know why anyone is ragging on the Bean. This is exactly the same sort of thing that hundreds of gossip bloggers write every single day! If she were just an anonymous fat man living in his parents' basement, you wouldn't say anything except, "BRAVO ENTY!"

So, BRAVO BEAN! She's just saying what we're all thinking.

whole lotto luv said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
__-__=__ said...

Weren't we just wondering why White Oprah isn't in jail?!?!?!?!?!

WBotW said...

It's so odd... every single Mina I have ever come across has been a completely useless cunt. How lovely to know that this extends to cyberspace as well!

I LOVE Frances and personally think that compared to most teenaged girls out there, especially celebuspawn, her attitude is pretty fucking tolerable.

karen said...

Why do I sound bitter?
Okay, I might be bitter because I didn't get the chance to work as an intern for RollingStone Magazin at the age of fifteen just because I'm the offspring of two famous rocker junkies. ;)

And the people she's fighting with aren't her friends. I actually doubt she really has any her own age.

I also don't think that we're in the position to condemn Ali for only being Lindsay's sister (I don't know what else she has done so far that would be so scandalous and outrageous that would justify the constant bashing of the girl) and yet praise Frances for writing a semi-coherent letter. A task every person her age should be able to accomplish.

karen said...

WBotW, fuck off you anti-social scum.

Shmooey said...

This is rich coming from the offspring of one of the biggest self-promoters of all time, best known for her outrageous behaviour and association with famous people than for any work she's ever done.

Frances learned the difference between "fame" and "infamy" at home, and very early on.

RocketQueen said...

@Mina - ignore the troll. She alienates everyone. No opinion is worthy but the one she herself holds.

I find something a little fishy with this item, actually. Perhaps I'm just surprised that a 16 year old (right?) is able to correctly utilize the word "transcend". Me wonders if Courtney didn't have something to do with this?

emailchallenged said...

she's very articulate for a young girl. i have to say i agree with the general ideology of the message

Unknown said...

While she does have a very valid point and I agree, isn't it a bit... pot-kettle of her?

She looks more like Kurt than Courtney, thank god.

Anonymous said...

Like mother like daughter... freedom of speech but at least I agree with Frances. And oh the girl can spell. Unlike the mother.

No1uNo said...

But she didn't correctly utilize the word "transcend", unless I'm missing something. She also misused "rendering" --or else left out another word, --and the spelling is horrid, but I agree with the sentiment.

However I'm starting to think that teenagers -- famous or not -- shouldn't be allowed to use twitter because they seem to be missing the part of the brain that differentiates between "private inner thoughts" and "The whole world needs to hear this!!!" What happened to keeping a diary??
**is old**

Pookie said...

i'd comment, but i'm too busy loling at "The word of The Bean." teehee!

*wants to teach said bean the dif between 'you're' and 'your'*

BigMama said...

Mina - The fact of the matter is that some people really do get ahead in life because of family connections. Good looking people usually get interviews before average people. And "well connected" sometimes just means my grandpa fought along side your grandpa in a long forgotten war. However, things usually do even out in the end. Just like the old saying "being rich doesn't make you happy" having an edge doesn't always make life easier. Being an average person who works hard probably will mean that not only will they appreciate it more someday but they know HOW to work hard. Francis Bean has had a shitty life. No one can deny that. She has been brought up in an enviroment of rock stars and bad behavior. I think everyone is impressed because the cards were stacked against her (look at MacKenzie) yet she seems to be behaving like a normal snottey teen. Notice the normal part. So, take a deep breath and relax. In the words of W. Goldstein "The world isn't fair and anyone who tells you it is , is trying to sell you something"

Lioness70 said...

Mina, you're a bitter Betty, huh?

Why are all of your comments so patronizing?

More importantly, why are you here? You were one of the ones ragging on Enty's existence a few weeks ago.

Not surprising that you don't have a Blogger profile. Most trolls usually don't.

Take the spewing somewhere where it'll be appreciated, ok?

Majik said...

She didn't use transcend properly at all--I think she meant 'transform'.

I think the letter is hilarious, I agree with her...I also agree that if it were anyone else this would be a non-issue.

God help the future fame-whores once the Bean properly grows into her vocabulary....hopefully she has the poetic artistry of her father, but none of his demons.

Lioness70 said...

As for the comments, hell, they're from a 16 year old girl. I came across an old diary of mine that I wrote when I was 16. I laughed at how overwrought the writing was, and over such trivial things.

Anyway, if she has it more together than most girls in Hollyweird, that's because she had to parent herself. Not an easy task for anyone.

oeoirico said...

"This is my open letter to Ali Lohan. Your not entitled to anything simply because your sister has a recognizable name. Your idea of fame isn"

The above represents the 140 characters allowed in a single tweet. So then, did someone else cut, paste, and re-edit Bean's 8 supposed tweets into a coherent, articulate statement? Or was she using "RichTweets"?

ardleighstreet said...

Well at least SOMEONE told Ali that she needs help. Good for the Bean! Bravo!

Judi said...

I like Bean but this is gratuitous bashing. Not helpful. I really wish she'd said this to Lilo and not the kid sister.

B626 said...

I can't help wondering if Bean has lived comfortably financially wise
due to Kurt's estate and does not understand the 'we need money-NOW' mentality of the Lohan clan hand to mouth inconsistent money machine.
Yes, Bean's mom IS batshit crazy but the fear of living destitute right around the corner is not something she fears daily.
Is it?

Anonymous said...

Twitter is for people to voice their opinions about *whatever*. Therefore, The Bean gets to say whatever she wants about anyone.

Lots of information we don't know: maybe someone compared Ali to her and that got under her skin? Maybe Ali Lohan's people (if she's got them) reached out to The Bean to form a "friendship"? It could be anything or it could be nothing. After all, she's 16!

lana said...

Hey wait! Bean is ONLY famous for being Kurt Cobain's daughter and Courtney's. So she should stay out of the mielight until she work's her ass off etc

selenakyle said...

the Bean Rocks!

Selock said...

I'll have to defend Mina, in a way.

"The Bean" is some kid, not much more articulate than many others her age I know, to be quite honest. And her Hot Topic style and cynicism are FAR more in fashion than her airheaded target's cheesy lifestyle.

Why are people praising her so heavily? This thread is indeed at least a little hypocritical, come now. Ms. Cobain is a lot more head cheerleader than righteous underground revolutionary.

bionic bunny! said...

can i just say that mina contributed her opinion to the the post, and stayed on topic?
she may or may not be right, just like the rest of us. differing opinions are welcome here.
we all know who the damn troll is here, the only mistake mina made was feeding it. bashing each other accomplishes nothing.
okay, with that off my chest, i would really love to know the background to this. what set the bean off? she is SO much more articulate than her mother, ali, OR the rest of the lohans. she does sound pretty pissed about something. i find it pretty funny, but i find twitter pretty annoying in general.
yes, i'm all rainbows and sunshine at the moment. i'm letting mooshki have the evening off! ;)

GoGo said...

Insert "Courney Love" or "mama" (if you can e'en believe FB calls CL that!) in place of "Ali Lohan," or "ali lohan" and this could totally be a letter to mom...

lulu said...

if the person who wrote this tweet wasn't kurt cobain's daughter, no one would be raving about it. they'd say, "that bitch is practically illiterate!" i don't know anything about the girl but judging from this tweet, it looks like everyone is desperate to make her into much more than she is-because of whose daughter she is. i see a bunch of kurt cobain loving nirvana fans are attributing deep insight and writing skills, acerbic wit and social commentary that just isn't there. it's just the jealousy of a potato faced muffin-top who is jealous of someone who has a nicer body than she does. any girl who went to high school knows what i'm talking about, and if you don't know what i mean, then you are an ostrich and it's high time you took your head out of the sand and looked around at reality!
i also think it's rich that someone who had an internship at a magazine has such trouble with spelling, grammar, and the meaning of words.

Shmooey said...

Lulu - although I don't think she wrote the rant out of jealousy, I do agree that, as you say, people tend to "make her into much more than she is-because of whose daughter she is", and "are attributing deep insight and writing skills, acerbic wit and social commentary that just isn't there".


Although I am immensely impressed that thus far she does not seem to have turned out a raging mess, considering the upbringing she has had and the sort of example her mother has set, she has otherwise done nothing to distinguish herself, or to deserve the "fame" she has: She was born into it - It doesn't get any more "easily achievable" than that.

Putting aside the fact that her mother has greatly capitalized on her associations with famous people and dedicated herself to building up her quocient of infamy (like GoGo says, one could substitute "Courtney Love" for "Ali Lohan" and her open letter would still make sense), Frances herself is no stranger totaking advantage of a relative's "recognizable name" to make her "entitled ass noticed":

She has given at least 4 interviews, to Teen Vogue in 2005;
to i-D magazine and ELLE in 2006; and to Harper's Bazaar in 2008.

None of those interviews she scored because of her body of work, but because of whose daughter she is.

In none of those interviews did she discuss how she was working her "ass off" in order to one day deserve the notoriety and opportunities she has been given.

Instead, she talked about herself, her personal style, what it was like being the daughter of her famous parents, what it was like having Michael Stipe for her godfather and going to school with Demi Moore's and Bruce Willis daughter.
Oh, and she modelled Kurt's clothes for the Harper's Bazaar photo shoot.

So, even though she is right in that real fame ought to follow personal achievement and not be bestowed on someone with no discernable talent because of who they are associated to, she does not have the moral high ground to cast judgement on someone else in this regard.

Her rant at Ali Lohan is not a deep insightful commentary on the nature of fame, it is simply a 17-year-old ragging on a 15-year-old.

If she is so disgusted by easy "infamy", there are much bigger and worthier targets than an adolescent who is being dragged along a very dangerous path by her insane family.

For all her madness, Courtney did one thing right - she seems to have always allowed her daughter freedom to choose her own path in life.

That is one advantage Ali Lohan does not have.

amanda rae said...

Lulu-

Oh yes, I know EXACTLY what you're talking about, and ITA with you. Shit like that is why, at 27 years old, I still do not have a single female friend (haven't since high school when I finally wised up). I just cannot deal with the jealousy, backstabbing, and general hatefulness of females. And honestly, I don't feel I'm missing out on anything. I would be willing to bet that there's more to this than we think...like Ali stole some guy that Frances liked, or some stupid shit like that. Just typical female bullshit. But I still think Frances is prettier than Progeria Lohan, even though she has the dumbest fucking name. I guess I just feel bad for both, because they're stuck in the machine and have no idea that they can opt out. And they probably won't ever figure it out, so look forward to more of this shit until they both drop dead of overdoses or whatever. Yay!

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