Tuesday, April 19, 2011

And The Excuse Is?


After working feverishly thinking of an excuse for the Vanessa Hudgens licking debacle, her publicist finally settled on white chocolate. In the annals of excuses, it is not a bad one. In the food category I was going to with some type of glazed frosting so white chocolate is not that far off. However, lets talk about white chocolate and the heat. Does anyone pick white chocolate over milk chocolate? Second, who keeps any kind of chocolate in a baggie when it is literally over 100 degrees outside and you are in the hot sun? Forget just the spoilage factor, think about the fact that you are going to end up with a very runny liquid and not the past that Vanessa is spreading on her finger. Of course, the fact she is not snorting the chocolate is points in her favor and there is no one around to disprove it. It will probably be a best seller everywhere this summer. "Chocolate. Get your white chocolate melted and runny in a bag here."

41 comments:

Momster said...

Really? That's the best excuse they could come up with?

i said...

White chocolate is fat. it is not chocolate. who carries fat around in a little zip? Meth or coca is my guess.

selenakyle said...

I guess one could get high just by "eating" coke.

I suppose it could keep the hunger at bay while not making you all gakked out due to snorting it.

Not sure...only ever snorted mine...

RocketQueen said...

Since learning about the existence of molly, I've decided it's definitely molly.

MISCH said...

Yes, White Chocolate is the bi-product in the chocolate making process...the waste actually....I personally don't care for it...
And some people rub coke on their gums...and other places...I have no idea why...I only tried it once and really hated that rush that some people seem to like.
As for what she's doing...I haven't got a clue....

Anonymous said...

You keep reaching with this one. I have had melted chocolate on me before. Next.

lyz said...

what is molly??

Goggles Pisano said...

Personally, I would've went with Fun Dips myself... or Kool-Aid packets.

Of course, you'd need a red-painted Kevin Federline to jump out of the bushes and yell,"OHHH, YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!"

Danielle said...

yack.. she really gives me the heebie geebies for some reason.

Anonymous said...

Of course, you'd need a red-painted Kevin Federline to jump out of the bushes and yell,"OHHH, YEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!"
=============

HILARIOUS!

Robert said...

If you see the pictures of her "dancing" at some point during the show ("more like a full-body dry heave set to music,") that must have been some chocolate!

chopchop said...

I love white chocolate. If I had to choose, I'd probably pick white over milk. But dark chocolate trumps all.

joymama said...

I think it very well could be some sort of melted chocolate maybe off a pastry or treat. I'm going to give her this one since I've had stuff melt in my purse.

If it were coke, wouldn't it blow away? It looks like a bunch to just lick off a finger at one time.

bluebonnetmom said...

I will forever try to erase K Fed as the Kool Aid guy from my head now. That was funny as HELL!!!! : )
Not sure what she was "eating or licking". Why would you not bring the bag or container of whatever it is out of the purse? That part is weird.

LL said...

it's molly, or mdma, which is (in this case)a white paste ingested by mouth.

bluebonnetmom said...

Molly or MDMA is a pure form of Ecstasy in paste/powder form. I guess you can eat it. You can find out anything on Al Gore's Internet!

__-__=__ said...

I also love white chocolate. I would pick white over milk or dark. Given the opportunity I'm sure I would snort it. Having said that, I'm pretty sure what she has is NOT white chocolate! I have never had white chocolate at a festival - not that I wouldn't if it were offered!

Nessie said...

Anyway who would stick their tong so far out as to be scared to 'loose' any of the chococlate when it's pasted to your finger? And then she bends her head down as well, looks kind of suspicious.

Definitely drugs if you ask me.

Patty said...

And she managed to reset the clock on her 15 minutes.

RocketQueen said...

lol Robert! (full body dry-heave) Oh Seinfeld, I will be quoting you til the day I die.

lanasyogamama said...

The "chocolate" made her forget to her dumb smirk smile for a moment.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

Like I said yesterday, Marshamallow Fluff, Yo.

Marshmallow fluff.

Chrissy Buns said...

@Patty...i was thinking the same thing! bahahaha!

Cecilia00 said...

Yes, I love white chocolate over milk and dark varieties (and currently there is a Lindt's dark chocolate bar with chili flavor in my purse)

But no, I do not believe that is white chocolate. Not that I care.

Linnea said...

Jason - you looking for a job as a publicist?

mooshki said...

White chocolate, even melted, wouldn't look like that. It isn't the right texture.

caydian said...

Her publicist has no imagination. What about vegemite or poi?

A baggie of goo is sooooo much more believable than a baggie of Betty Crocker!

Jason Blue Eyes said...

@linnea - Sure. I can come up with stuff way better then most of the morons that represent half the industry. LoL.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

Most white chocolate I see is more yellow than anything. Ever melt white chocolate in the microwave. It looks like banana pudding.

crila16 said...

What a moron for a publicist. Really? White powdered chocolate? Maybe she had a bag full of hot water she was going to mix it with, so she could make white hot chocolate, cause white hot chocolate is so popular. She'll be disappearing within the next few years. Maybe if her publicist let her taint her personality a bit, she'd stick around longer. That's the only reason she's even in the news now. Otherwise, who cares.

Meg said...

I love white chocolate. Especially on mini pretzels. Mmm.

C'mon Vanessa, you can do better than that! I would have said frosting of some sort. Coachella Cupcakes?

ljsmed said...

Molly

Mango said...

@ Robert - Thanks for the Elaine Benes reference! ;)

Kelly said...

This is obviously Molly she is using, it's very common at festivals/hippie shows and is consumed by wetting your finger and licking it off. I think it's a pure form of ecstasy ha white chocolate my ASS!

ForSure said...

I agree, there was no reason to hide the product in her purse unless it was something she didn't want seen. If it was really melted white chocolate, the wrapper would be in her other hand.

Sevenmack said...

She can do all the Molly or white chocolate she wants for all I care. As long as she's not harming anyone else. Just legalize it.

yesthatwouldbeme said...

it's a (big) dip of molly... the active ingredient in a hit of ecstacy. basically MDMA powder...

perfect for a day @ coachella, it tastes bitter/vile but the good stuff can make it the best day of your life...

childeroland said...

white chocolate is nasty.

J-Mo said...

I don't know why no one said toothpaste. If I had lunch breath and some toothpaste handy, I would discreetly use it.

fairylights said...

Adore white chocolate, it's my indulgence of choice... and I agree it looks nothing like whatever she's tonguing.

awesome balla. said...

as someone who was at coachella and could have been spotted doing the same thing...def molly.

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