Friday, April 05, 2019

Your Turn

Have you done one of those genetic testing kits?

96 comments:

momo said...

I would never do one. It would be a betrayal to my ancestors and their peers who went to great lengths to hide the truth re: paternity. Let's just let the bibles and tombstones speak for themselves.

Now! said...

Yup. Probably a bad idea, but it's done now. Ancestry results were as expected; health predictions were more interesting.

Sagan said...

We've done the genetic Ancestry + Me kits, but did not opt for the Medical Insight portion. There's something creepy AF to know a computer somewhere can tell you you're gonna get Diabetes or Parkinson's in X number of years.

And, call me nuts, but I don't like the idea of my DNA being fed into a computer and shared with insurance providers who keep it and possibly use it against me when I reach a certain age, not because I may have developed something, but because I *might* develop something. Like "Minority Report" for the health industry.

cheesegrater15 said...

No, but I want to.

Super Comic Fun Time! said...

NO!

Let the past stay buried in the past, I say!

Max Power said...

My girlfriend bought 23andme for me as my bio dad is unknown. So far, zero help in that regard, but I did discover that I have a new half-sister from my long-deceased mother. Apparently she was born in an Salvation Army unwed mother hospital in Omaha when my mom was 17. Quite scandalous at the time, which would explain the out-of-state birth. We 4 kids already recently figured out that each of us have a different father, now a 5th father is in the mix! As my recently-deceased aunt said as we was describing my mother's sorbid past, "Ya know.... your grandmother was ALSO quite the 'lady about town'" Which is a wonderfully Midwest way of saying that I'm a descendent of long lineage of whores. That actually explains a lot. lol

roque said...

Yes, to find out if I had the same genetic cancer markings as my mom does because I'm a wuss and didn't want to get a blood test if I didn't have to. Biggest surprise, I'm something like 88% Italian and 11% French, which I knew, but that last 1% is... Norwegian?

Dahling said...

(Pardon me whilst I adjust my tinfoil hat...)
NOPE! Waaay too Big Brother for me. Creepy AF is right. I'm with Sagan up there.

Humor Me said...

momo - as someone who has traced multiple limbs of her family, the secrets will come out because of old fashioned documentation. I discovered a grandfather that two wives, and he was not Morman or a bigamist. I discovered several illegitimate births because of multiple different birth dates, the census, legal documents and the family bible. True, DNA does uncover deep secrets - in my family's case, it only solidified what we already knew.

Brayson87 said...

Yup, could probably sell my DNA, medically speaking genetically grade A, continues to piss off friends and relatives that keep finding out they're at risk for stuff 😅

Simon said...

No! Biggest hoax out there. You pay them to steal your DNA to do with whatever they want. Never have and never will.

Trinak said...

Yes and I found out that my dad wasn't really my biological father.

Paul Saint John said...

Nope! Never! All they want is clone my perfect body/mind combination. I'm not giving for free the key to my perfection.

Alf Landon said...

No, it's a scam

Elphin MacSkye said...

HELL NO

Village Guru said...

No. I was #4 in a family of five legal children, and I am the last surviving. My dad had numerous affairs, at least one of which produced a half-brother who does not know about us. He loved affairs, especially if they already had a husband.

The half-brother's family was terrified that one of us would contact him at some point but we did not, although my oldest sister was originally hell-bent on doing so. She went so far as to anonymously visit the town he lives in and even had contact with one or two of his older relatives but without revealing who she was. She did this after we talked her out of contacting him, so ultimately she did not. Thanks for small favors!

If I were to do the DNA test that puts me at risk that he might discover me. I want nothing to do with the man partly due to respect for his relatives' life-long wishes and also because he's a registered sex offender, having molested his two stepdaughters while living in another state. Served two years prison time for that, then returned alone to the town of his birth in the same state I live in now.

Years ago I researched my family tree so I know where we came from. I'm not in any way concerned about possible health issues. Let sleeping dogs lie unless it's super-critical to do otherwise.


Lisa said...

I did one for ancestry, not health. I had one question regarding a great great grandfather who was said to be a French military leader who fought in the Tex-Mexico War and settled on the southern border of Texas. It was said my great great grandmother was French, as well. But the one photo I have of my great grandmother made me think maybe she was of Mexican descent. I am the only sibling of 5 who has more olive skin and lots of dark curly hair... vs the other blond/blue eyed kids...and I looked like nobody until I found her picture when my grandfather died when I was an adult...and I look like her. :) The others look like my dad's family. The test showed I was everything I thought I was, white European and Scandinavian, with a surprise 9% Native American from the Central American region. It was exciting to pin that down!

alphacranberry said...

I did. No big surprizes for me. My wife grew up thinking she was a true mutt, but turns out her genes are 95% English and 5% Scottish/Irish. My twins were the big question, as they are adopted. We didn't release their results online because they are too young. Now at least they know where they come from. (West/Central Africa, Northern Germany and Sweden)

Elphin MacSkye said...

I already knew my family history because I have Mormons on both sides of my ancestry, and they're religious about geneology. A close relative did one, and it bore out every bit of the geneology.

SDJ said...

Yup. Stumbled onto a secret half-sibling no one was supposed to know about.

confuscious say said...

colleted dna is used by the deep state to tag each of you so they can build race specific bio-weapons, organ match database for their members, mess with your head (they put out false infomation as part of social re-engeneering) yes, your results are not acurate. it's a farce and a sinister plot. u have been warned. think of it as facebook 2.0, AND SAGAM my god, they are deffenitely putting your dna into their computer.

Stupidpervs said...

Nope..in already screwed by my genes...however my sister is in the database for a cancer research hospital they said her case was 1 in a million but tell that to my family that's already been killed by cancer ...seems like we are 8 in a million

confuscious say said...

oh ya the best part, when there is an organ match for one of their members, you just sort of disapear one day. poof. gone.

Stevie Nixed said...

We wanted to test for a specific gene to see if I was a carrier (achromatopic congenetial cone dysfunction). My husband has a severe visual handicap. The specialist said it was too expensive (now it only costs 40 euros) and the lab would refus anyway. "Chances are much lower than, say, Down syndrome." Anyway, apparently not a carrier since both kids have great eye sight.

Flashy Vic said...

Nope. Those fuckers want to clone me then they'll have to kill me first.

My late father and uncle were into geneology after they both retired but this was twenty years ago before the DNA kit craze. They did get our direct male surname back to 1480 to a Welsh guy from a Welsh hamlet who moved to Gloucester , a place that I lived 10 miles from for 8 years (I'm not Welsh) which was a nice weird coincidence.

On my English dad's side we're Saahff Lahndahn docks mutts, mainly English (though Taffies half a millennial ago) with a bit of Cornish, Jewish and Norwegian thrown in.

While on my mother's side we are disturbingly samey Ulster Scots for four odd centuries. Never out of the same bit of Armagh for 200 years then never out of the same bit of East Belfast for the rest until the 60s. I'm distantly related to most of the Lower Newtownards Road. During the troubles wherever any Loyalist paramilitary from the 'East' (& there's a shit load of them there still) was shot, lifted or jailed my mother when hearing the name on the news would inevitably say something like,"Och, that's our Carol's boy's son" or "That side were were always a bit aff, ya cuddn't luk at her wi'out feeling a scud put on ye" stuff like that.

One of her first cousins - from the 'aff' side who feuded with our, in my ma's eyes, obviously righteous and honest side of the family over which sibling inherited a wee corner shop on Dee St in 1910 or something way back when you - was an infamous Loyalist paramilitary from leader and murdering fucktard who - as such persons do - led a long and suspiciously prosperous life lauded by government lickspittles for his role in the 'peace process' i.e. they bribed him fucking buckets of spondoolicks.



So who wouldn't want a luck of old Flashy's genetic ice lolly,eh?

Flashy Vic said...

They did get our direct male surname back to 1480 to a Welsh guy from a Welsh hamlet who moved to Gloucester , a place that I lived 10 miles from for 8 years (I'm not Welsh) which was a nice weird coincidence.


I meant lived 10miles from the Welsh hamlet for 8years, not Gloucester, thank God, which surprisingly, is a shithole. Fred West was butchering everyone around there back in the 70s and 80s and wasn't considered out of place. It's that sort of town.

Unknown said...

I haven't done it but my sibs and dad have. We are def Ashkenazic Jews as the results ranged from 100% to 99.8%. Nobody strayed for many, many generations which is kind of amazing.

My brother was glad to see no cancer gene.

tehbird said...

They’re not getting my DNA. Ever.

Trapped said...

My family is already screwed up, I don't need to know anything else..
I already knows some things they don't think I know, but it's not my business

Kansa said...

Yes, I did it about five years ago. There were some surprises, including some Italian connections, and North and Sub-Saharan Africa bits. The biggest surprise was in my family tree. Through the wonders of 23andme, and FB, I got in touch with a lady whose family left the same island which my grandmother was from, about 300 years earlier than when my grandmother left. We don't share a last name. However, one look at this lady, and it was like looking at a younger version of my grandmother, right down to her hairstyle! I know it is just coincidence, but her son and I have the same first name, just the ending vowel is different due to gender. I had told him he was going to fall down on the floor when he saw our family photos, and he wrote back and said he was sitting on the floor. The other good aspect of doing my dna is that I found out that I have a very high risk or a toxic reaction to a particular antibiotic, and it's just luck that I have never had that one.

Brayson87 said...

Conspiracy, whatever. You're going to die sooner than you think, so unless you're planning on committing the crime of the century you might as well have some fun and find out things about yourself. If they want to clone you they'll just dig up your corpse, and that's only if they don't already have your DNA.
You didn't really think they needed all those blood collection tubes for regular lab tests did you? ;)

Anonymous said...

Yes but I chose only to do Ancestry not medical. With a for-profit insurance industry I didn't want my medical DNA available to pencil pushers deciding what future treatments I can or can't have.

Ancestry DNA turned out to be identical to what we expected. 58% England, Wales and Northwestern Europe. 32% Ireland and Scotland. 5% Sweden and 2% Norway (those naughty raiding Vikings). One maternal relative came to England with William the Conqueror as a general. Another came to England later in the Huguenot wave from France. The English King himself paid for the ship that sent my Huguenot family to America. Both sides were in America long before the American Revolutionary War. So basically I'm American but as British as anything walking around England today.

Ancestry DNA was accurate. It immediately pulled up my half brother I knew about but hadn't seen in 50+ years. I'm hoping it's even longer because I have no use for my paternal relatives.

Flashy Vic said...

Oh I forgot this one. I have the same surname as a still living very big rock star from a huge 60s English band which doesn't perform anymore...so not the Stones or the Who...but he does. And he's a cunt. So it might be obvious now.

Even though I cannot find anything which says we are related in any way, photos of him and me when we were both around 20 - though there's twenty years between us - and we could be identical twins.

I tried to use this fact of surnames and looks and try to chat up girls by saying he was my uncle.

It failed utterly.

Mainly due to the fact that the big haired clueless bints didn't have a fucking clue who he was if he wasn't in Duran Duran or Spandau Ballix or any of those other fucking woeful big trousered 80s shite.

Though a lot of guys used to ask, "Any relation?" I shoudda been gay.

Flashy Vic said...

I don't look remotely like the fuvker now, thank fuck. Even though he's weathered better than I have. The likeness only lasted until my thirties. Still, it used to be uncanny.

Vita said...

Nope! +1 to Sagan and all other paranoid commenters...and they're not getting my dog's, either!hmmph!

Brayson and others of pure and healthy stock-- run! They may try to capture you and warehouse you in that Arctic vault, like a bunch of heirloom tomato seeds!

Vita said...

Flashy-- your tales are hilarious! More hints on this rocker, please! Heavier rock or more poppy, Herman's Hermits fare?

Flashy Vic said...

If I give the genre away it would be obvious, but not Herman's Hermits style pop. Though Peter Noone would be a great uncle.

Flashy Vic said...

Even millennials would know the band, by name if not anything else. Anyone over forty will probably know the guy...men anyway, if the past dating disasters are anything to go by.

Anonymous said...

Sir Paul McCartney? Otherwise Cream, Yardbirds, Animals. Am I getting warmer?

Katrina's Voice said...

Yes! Both Ancestry and Health - I am adopted, so wanted more info. In fact, I did 2 separate Entity DNA tests (MyHeritage & 23&Me)one I received without cost, the other I gladly paid for.

I found 5 half siblings, and multiple nieces, nephews, Aunts, Uncles. Not a pretty story - and I won't bore you with details - but fascinating to me. I'm meeting up with some of my new found family members in a month (we are all in different parts of the Country). To each their own, but I'm glad I had my DNA tested.

tinydancer61 said...

Nope. What do "they" do with your DNA after they test it?

bellabella said...

I did Ancestry. It came out exactly like my relative who had been tracing our genealogy for years predicted. My husband’s cousin found out her dad isn’t her real dad. I’m hearing similar stories from other people.... ALL the skeletons are coming out of the closet with these tests.

Anonymous said...

Flashy I'm changing my guess to Eric Clapton. That "c**t" clue keeps pulling me back to Clapton. I've read both Clapton and Pattie Boyd's autobiographies and "c**t" perfectly describes Clapton. I always loved his music but he's definitely a wanker.

Flashy Vic said...

@Ann. Not Macca. As for the band guesses, all wrong but maybe slightly better known. Definitely moved in the same circles as those.

Flashy Vic said...

Not Eric 'Clapp' either. Decent guess though.Brilliant guitarist, huge talent, massive cunt.

Frankie Boyle joked that he liked "that Clapton tribute song for his dead kid, what was it called? 'I should have shut the fucking window' or something."

Vita said...

Flashy-- Ive been thinking Ray Davies/Kinks?

Flashy Vic said...

Oh no. But he would be awesome too. He was a huge cunt to his brother. But they've made up, again, and are touring again. One of the few bands I would actually drag my lazy carcass out to see if the hove within distance of me. But they haven't.

Vita said...

Ok, forgot you'd be getting a whole branch of the tree with them. They'd be worth the ticket, I agree.

Vita said...

Have never heard any gossip good or bad, but Steve Winwood?

Flashy Vic said...

Nope, not Stevie Winwood. A nice fella by all accounts.

The band is arguably in the top five of rock bands of all time, certainly top ten. They had a yuuuuuuge and legendary album in particular. And 'legendary' isn't hyperbole.

Jane said...

Yep. The hubby and I Did 23andMe about 7 years ago. Don't regret it, found out some great information, and recommend it to others. I am not a tin foil hat wearing, conspiracy theory believing, whack job, so I have no worries about our information. We have clean pasts and don't plan on killing anyone now or in the future, so whether law enforcement gets it or not, isn't an issue either. It is good to know who and what you are.

Vita said...

Jane-- I love your avi picture! I notice it every time you comment

Im enjoying all of these stories!

Flashy Vic said...

@Jane.

and don't plan on killing anyone now or in the future


Ha! You say that now....

icantbelieveitsnotbutter said...

We leave traces of our DNA every time we go to the doctor, the dentist, etc. Who knows what's is truly done with our saliva and blood that we start giving away from a very young age. That being the case, an online DNA test is not a big deal.

Vita said...

Dave Clarke? Im frustrated Im not getting this with your clues and the ones guessed by others!!

Vita said...

Gerry Marsden? Btw, Im frustrated by my lack of brain power, not you...im grateful youre indulging us!

Flashy Vic said...

You'll not be glad all over to hear it's not Dave Clarke.

Or any of his five.

If I said 'prog' rock, would that help?

Vita said...

Icantbelieveitsnotbutter-- But that's all reasonable and stuff😕

Flashy Vic said...

Gerry is no longer with us, I think. But not that Merseybeat pop either though.

Max Power said...

Pink Floyd

Vita said...

Sure! Emerson, Lake or Palmer? A Moody Blue? One of the Yes guys?

Vita said...

Argh! Sleep deprivation is eating my brainz! Forgot about Pink Floyd! Great guess MaxPower! Roger Waters would fit

Flashy Vic said...

@Vita and Max Powers.

You might say that but I couldn't possibly comment.😗

Vita said...

Gotcha! Carry on, and thanks for playing along!

Max Power said...

Max Power for the WIN! lol

Unknown said...

I think you're right about it being Paul McCartney

Unknown said...

Cliff kitty Richards

Flashy Vic said...

Me at 20 ( the only pic I have of myself back then, an old passport one from '83.)


http://i66.tinypic.com/11r7okg.jpg


And the in no way that we can find related Roger Waters at the same age.


https://www.biography.com/.image/ar_1:1%2Cc_fill%2Ccs_srgb%2Cg_face%2Cq_auto:good%2Cw_300/MTIwNjA4NjM0MTYzNTI5MjI4/pink-floyd-with-syd-barrett.jpg




Anonymous said...

Led Zeppelin and Jimmy Paige. Paige's love of underage teen girls puts him high on the wanker list for me.

Flashy Vic said...

Please forgive my hair, it was actually quite long but I had pulled it back for the photo so it looked shorter. I didn't want to look shite my first time abroad as an adult, hence the shirt under the tee shirt....God I was dumb and scruffy.

molly said...

Found out from Ancestry that I was 100% white.......was hoping for a tint of something colorful.No big surprises there. Western European , little Irish, little British. Don't care about the govt. stealing DNA, feel sure they have agreements worked out with the hospitals. I prefer to treat myself ...and if I need a second opinion will go to a doctor. Found these horrendous skin cancers kinda' hidden from view...would not have even paid attn. but UK Daily Mail stated skin cancers itched. So, I mixed about 1/8 tsp turmeric with 1/2 tsp coconut oil and made a poultice (medicine by way of applying to skin) change out twice a day. They have shrunk about 1/2 the size in two weeks. Have seen this method work for two friends with brain tumors...........so no need to worry about cancer as long as we have turmeric. Our treatments cost about $5.00.

OKay said...

Not yet, but I'm totally going to one day...

Vita said...

Aww, the young Flashy!!!...you took the travelling very seriously! Such an official looking portrait. Can definitely see a resemblance to someone (savvy to try to use it in your favor), but the scale tips in your favor, Id say! 😁

Weekittylass said...

Vic I can’t pull the link on your photo but progressive rock, massive cunt still performing screams Phil Collins to me.

Weekittylass said...

My family has done it. No surprises. It’s unbelievable how my father’s Irish blood knocked out the Hispanic/African genetics right out of us. We are all tall, blond and blue eyed. Those damn Vikings had some strong seed spread around County Cork!

GentleBreeze said...

Oh, Flashy how cool. I'm sure we saw your current picture recently on here, too.

GentleBreeze said...

How weird I commented on another post about my DNA. Raw DNA (from ancestry.com)can be downloaded to GEDmatch.com gratis for additional information. Clovis, Neaderthal, Jewish, Siberian, Native American genes were all found. If one is floundering or lonely, a knowledge of genetic history is uplifting.

E said...

Never. Some Silicon Valley firm with my DNA? No thanks. It's bad enough I had my fingerprints stolen...

I did do it for my dog though!

Fiendish Man said...

I did the Ancestry test a long time ago. It helped uncover some mysteries while leaving others hidden. Some lines go back to medieval England. I've also found a lot of distant relations that I would not have known about otherwise.

My wife was also tested and we learned that her mother was adopted. She has had a happy reunion with a sister she never knew about. Recently I used Ancestry DNA to figure out who her birth father must have been but it's a bit more awkward trying to contact the father's side so might hold off on that for a while.

The ethnicity estimates can be close but tend to be a bit wonky as well. Geneticists who are not on the payroll of DNA testing companies say that your DNA can only say what continent your ancestors are from. Anything more specific (country or region) is based on probability and varies from company to company.

Rosie riveter said...

David Gilmore!

Rosie riveter said...

"Ancestry.com
-making white people feel cool since 2014"

Mango said...

I took the 23andMe about five years ago when the genetic health risks were included in the findings (now you pay extra for that). The health dispositions showed that in almost all cases "variants not detected" and a few, "variant detected, not likely at increased risk", so that was a relief but hardly a guarantee.

I found some interesting stuff about my dad's ancestral makeup that was not what I (and I believe not what my father) thought. I also found out that I had two first cousins that I didn't know about. I messaged and then later chatted on the phone with one of them, "J" and we were able to piece together that our fathers were half brothers. He said his grandfather was an abusive man who married and had three sons. His grandfather's wife (our mutual grandmother) left him. She later married (I think?) my grandfather and had four children with him. My grandfather was also an abusive jerk, so I guess grandma had a type. Oddly she named a son from each marriage the same name. (Hope she didn't name them for another husband she had squirreled away.)

Flashy Vic said...

Oh I don't know, Rosie, you should go on the geneaology boards at citydata.com and feast on the shattered hopes of white people desperate for the touch of something exotic in their mix.

"My grandmother swore her granny was half Cherokee (it's always Cherokee for some reason) but it turns out I'm 70% Swedish, 20% Polish and 10% German.

Whole swathes of pasty, pale haggis, roast beef, spud, sausage, borsht, pickled fish and lasagne munching peasants scooped from the slums and middens of Europe and deposited into Columbia's welcoming embrace, all desperate for a hint of the darker oppressed to assuage their first world problemed white guilt.


It really is a hoot.

Em and 'im said...

No but my sister did. Assuming mum didn’t have it off with the milkman, we are 40 something per cent French, 30 something per cent Scottish, the remainder English, so sadly nothing exotic. My sister even had her animals, including a couple of moggies DNA tested. She would have had the budgie tested, and although I don’t know what end the swab had to go in, apparently it didn’t comply. She’s a complete nutter sometimes.

AbbyRock said...

No and won't. My brother-in-law did the 23 and Me. They always thought they were mainly French (paternal)and Irish (maternal). The family is actually Spanish and Irish with a bit of French .

luckythewondercat said...

Hell to the no. Companies like Ancestry and 23 and Me make money coming and going. They make money off the people who pay for the service and money off of insurance companies buying the results.

That being said I am glad law enforcement has used that kind of information to identify the Golden State Killer.

RobertaJoan said...

Gentleman. Plays organ in church. Said hello to him in NYC while strolling down the street. Big smile and heart hello. Seems lovely.

Had a daughter born when he was 16. I believe she was adopted out immediately. She looks JUST like him.

RobertaJoan said...

Roger Waters. Can be immensely unpleasant. Dark Side of the Moon.

RobertaJoan said...

Bingo. You both have large heads. Meant with all due respect. Honestly, you could be brothers.

Flashy Vic said...

Thank you,Roberta, in my case I need the huge napper to house my very obviously massive brain.😁

Glue said...

+1 Simon

Those DNA companies SELL your information to the highest bidder. Your DNA is being sold and bought. It's going to be a very bad thing in the future for those who did it and I have a feeling there is going to be major regret.

Those who did it, you signed that disclosure/contract (hope you read the fine print) and there's nothing you can do now. Those companies OWN your DNA information.

I know where I come from...no need for a scam company to tell me.

Collateral Justice said...

@Glue
If one sells out only their "own" sample then it would be no biggie. If a sibling trades privacy for ignorance the blood relatives with same parents have been violated.

The good news is it becomes easy to trace anyone who has mainlined Adrenochrome even once. Drinking requires that new fangled mass spectrometer magnetic wizz-bang for legal proof.

Nosey Parker said...

@Flashy Vic ... Thanks for your story! I'm not sure why people would think that Roger Waters is a cunt? I was lucky to have seen Animals and The Wall in concert and love Pink Floyd's lyrics/music.

Mrs Libnish said...

Nope. Nope on that. Not after I found out who owns those companies and what they really want to do with that data. It's just a way to gather the sheeple and mine their data. You are an effing idiot if you do it.

More Cowbell said...

I did 23 and Me before California banned certain medical info, which was the most important part. Very helpful back then!

Anonymous said...

Let me say that DNA is being tested before physicians develop a plan of treatment in cancer patients. Genetic testing helps oncologists determine which types of treatments to use and which won't work. So the days of keeping your DNA private are long gone. I have a lab appt next week for $40K worth of medical genetic testing before they will even remove my blood thinners. Genetic testing is firmly entrenched in medicine today.

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