Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Side By Side

Although it was fun trashing Jessica Alba yesterday, I thought that in order to be more sporting there should at least be a side by side comparison of the relevant photos. Now we can let the bashing begin. Since it is my blog, I will go first. You can see the terror on Janet Leigh's face on the right. Literally you can tell why she did not take a shower again in her life. (Thanks) Jessica on the other hand looks like she is either opening her mouth for a dental appointment or if we want to say she is an actress I guess she could be performing Psycho The Musical on Broadway. Set to the tune of whatever the hell you want to set it to."Someone's here. Who is it. Oh no, he's got a knife."
Jessica looks like a cartoon character here compared to Mia Farrow. I really hope they told her to go overboard and this isn't what her first thought was when they said Rosemary's Baby.
Tippi Hedren has some nice teeth doesn't she? That being said this is probably Jessica's best effort, although I don't know why they just curled the Drew Barrymore wig and couldn't spring for another wig. Look at the eyes on Tippi though.
Jessica here looks she has to burp or that some guy is coming to her with a new long distance plan she doesn't want to hear about. There is no way that Jessica could pull off Drew's expression even if she practiced and practiced for months.
OK, enough with the Alba, she is done for awhile.

18 comments:

pebbles said...

The only reason I can think of Ent, that Janet Leigh won't be taking a shower (to this day or any other), is because she died in 2004.

jax said...

lol pebbles..but she didn't when she was alive.

jessica looka lika man in that first pic. like they photoshopped her head on ryan reynolds body.

pebbles said...

yeah, I heard that too, jax.

A comedian once did a riff on Psycho, saying can you imagine if they had changed the shower scene to take place on the toilet, how everyone would be terrified of um, sitting on the throne. Hilarious.

kickapoo said...

Jessica's "acting" is hilarious.

mandythegreat said...

Bless her heart. She wants so hard to be a "good actress", when she knows in her heart that she's just a robotic T & A skank.

Anonymous said...

Yup, she still looks like she's auditioning for a Brawny commercial in the Rosemary's Baby one.

Unknown said...

her lips drive me crazy...and not in the good way... they ruin any kind of expression she tries to make. blegh.

Anonymous said...

How ironic that a woman who claims to not feel Latina, not only gets to BE in the mag Latina, but also as several white actresses.

suga said...

The problem with Jessica is that she is acting while trying to look pretty at the same time. You have to lose the pretty when you are trying to convey dark and ugly emotions like fear,shock, horror and disbelief.

SisterMaryHotPantz said...

I hear ya Jax. Her shoulders in the first pic are masculine.

I thought we were through with Alba?

Why does she get so much press?

WTF said...

These look even funnier side by side with the real pictures.

Unknown said...

LOL, love the Home Alone pose for Rosemary's Baby.

Jemtastic said...

Trix, isn't that the truth? Sadly, Alba can't even convey proper emotion in a photograph. Can you imagine what the other pictures looked like if these are the best ones?

Anonymous said...

@suga

You are SO right. I did a lot of theatre and modeling when I was younger until a year or two out of high school, and I took away this: If you plan to come across as "real" at all, you have to be unafraid to look foolish. You have to not take yourself seriously at all, because if you do, you will be too uptight and unwilling to be "real" or vulnerable by exposing real emotion.

She refuses to look anything other than perfect, so, you'll never get a real emotion out of her. When you "act", you feel stupid and having to look or portray something unflattering can make it worse...but if you dont let it go...well, you end up like Alba!!!

audrey said...

I am so relieved to find out I wasn't the only one who thought those pictures of Alba looked ridiculous.

roes thompson said...

suga you r so right
she want to look pretty but that
make u dumb
the 1st one is the worst

Unknown said...

I like that they only paid for 2 outfits and 2 wigs and got 4 different scenes. lol.

Tania said...

Damn, she is bad! And these are the pics they published - can you imagine the ones they rejected?

I used to find Dark Angel unintentionally hilarious because of her terrible 'acting'.

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