Monday, July 04, 2011

Blind Items Revealed

January 25, 2011

This A list long time rocker from one of the biggest rock groups ever has a secret. Although he has encouraged a reputation that he is a ladies man and has dated supermodels in the past, he did so knowing he has a very small peen. Extra small. Small as his first name in inches. So small that when he goes on tour he only ever has sex with groupies that have had several of the band or road crew first. Our singer feels like this way she will be tired and not notice how small he is.

Axl Rose

29 comments:

PM said...

That somewhat explains the doucheness.

flwrgurl said...

wow co-sign@PM

Little Miss Smoke and Mirrors said...

I LOVE THIS ONE!

ablake said...

I just picked up "Guns-n-Roses Greatest Hits" for the car. Great cd.

Just ewwwwwww though. He would RATHER get sloppy 3rd 4th or 5ths?
You just know he wanted Slash to go first. That guy looks like he's packed. Great autobiography too. He talked about how some groupie gave him crabs (I think he and Duff shared her) didn't mention Axl, though.

Green Sea Anemone said...

I have to have been worked over by "several" of the band or road crew to be tired enough not to notice your small dick? This does not reflect well on the skill level of your associates, Mr. Rose. Count on me being bored by the time you were ready to get your swerve on.

AMD said...

Wow. So what was that shoved down his spandex shorts in the "You Will Be Mine" video?

Robert said...

I usually feel bad for guys like this, but in this case, not so much. Like PM said, this explains a lot.

ItsAJ said...

"Small as his first name in inches"

Axl is 3 inches?! Awwww

RocketQueen said...

Oh, Axl. You're lucky I love "RocketQueen" so much.

Robin the Mad Photographer said...

Damn, talk about small peen syndrome...and why am I not surprised somehow? (No offense intended towards decent guys who happen to be a bit on the small side.) Does he really think that's going to work? It's more likely that the, um, contrast would be even more noticeable.

(Has Connie Hamzy ever said anything about him? Enquiring minds want to know...)

Kidsis said...

Well...at least it isn't a choad? ;p

The Throwback said...

This and the last reveal totally make up for the reality tv show ones at the beginning.

timebob said...

no wonder he is such a bitter guy. Money can't buy a big peen.

Kimstyle said...

Ewwww... Just ewwww.... Good reveal though

BigMama said...

someone forgot to tell him "it ain't the size of the clipper...yadda yadda" what a twit

KathyVermont said...

I think I would notice anyway, wouldn't you? But Slash, yeah, if Perla wouldn't go after me, I'd be all over that!

Jason Blue Eyes said...

I used to know a guy that would walk around saying "Man, Axl Rose is a f***in dick." What he should have said was "Man, Axl Rose has a tiny dick." But this was before the internet so how could we know?

Alicia said...

ew! lolz

The Nightmare Child said...

I KNEW IT!

Momster said...

You mean, once upon a time there was no internet?? ;)

Maybe this was why he was always so tempermental, and always beating up his ladies (Stephanie Seymour, Erin Everly, etc)

KLM said...

Rocket Queen is one of my all-time favourite songs. I don't really care about this blind. Still love me some G&R!

jess said...

Suhyphen said "He would RATHER get sloppy 3rd 4th or 5ths?" That's just nasty!

LMAO @JasonBE

Jasmine said...

FAV BLIND SO FAR!

And Sweet Child O' Mine is the best Guns & Roses song ever.

sunnyside1213 said...

I believe he puts a kotex down the front like Mick Jagger.

MadLyb said...

Haha! I was watching a Guns 'n Roses video the other night and wondered where his pee was. That's not normally my thought when watching a guy, however, I had watched a Led Zeppelin video prior. Did not even think of this blind at the time. Poor Axl. No wonder he's such a jerk.

MadLyb said...

pee = peen.

BlahFrickinBlah said...

Doesn't shock me but I had to look him up again on the famous penis chart on Metal Sludge. Apparently, groupies shared some of their "info" with the author of the list and ta da! Here is what was said about Axl:

Axl Rose / Guns N Roses
Temper tantrum boy has only an average cock but above average sized balls. We heard he had one of his famous models (Seymour) take a dump in a kitty liter box!!! I don't know about you girls, but my pussy ain't going anywhere near a litter box.

I have never been able to get the litter box deal out of my head. Just all sorts of wrong. Eww.

kerri said...

Blah: you just made my day:)

Rock said...

Biggest rock groups ever??? Are you kidding me? Barely 2 and a half albums. Iconic songs yes. Biggest rock groups ever? Not by a long friggin mile. Boy this was blind.

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