Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Serena Williams Says Rape Victim In Steubenville Is Partly To Blame

Rolling Stone is just filled with interesting stuff this week. Johnny Depp and his comments and Serena Williams says the teen who got raped in Steubenville is partly to blame for what happened. Yeah, I know she has a quote where she says she is not blaming the teen, but then she blames the teen. So, don't just read the quote about not blaming her, read what she says when she says, "Do you think it was fair, what they got? They did something stupid, but I don't know. I'm not blaming the girl, but if you're a 16-year-old and you're drunk like that, your parents should teach you—don't take drinks from other people."

She then makes things worse by saying, "She's 16, why was she that drunk where she doesn't remember? It could have been much worse. She's lucky. Obviously I don't know, maybe she wasn't a virgin, but she shouldn't have put herself in that position."

I'm pretty shocked by what Serena said here. Contrary to not blaming the teen, it sounds like she is blaming the entire thing on her and that if she had been a virgin this would not have happened? I don't get that part. I do know that Serena is not going to make very many friends by saying what she did.


131 comments:

FSP said...

She look like man.

MontanaMarriott said...

Lawd today must be "dumb ass things to say" day

greenmountaingal said...

Serena is a jackass.

mynerva said...

Well clearly if someone has had sex before its not a problem if they are raped. Such a stupid comment from Serena.

KPeony said...

I can understand what she's trying to say. I don't think she's blaming her, she's just trying to say that this girl grew up too fast, as evidenced by her actions, and ended up in a terrible situation.

LottaColada said...

Of course she said that, everyone knows that women are always asking for it! Men are never to blame for their actions!

Maximus said...

Women who say such things should be punch squah in the throat.

MISCH said...

Shut-up Serena....

KPeony said...

I want to add that I do not blame the victim at all and those guys should be put away for a long ass time along with anyone that tried to cover it up. Enty is trolling us for a flame war in the comments today.

detown359 said...

Why is she even commenting on this?

msgirl said...

Serena is now on spin control and apologized to the parents of the girl. "What was written – what I supposedly said – is insensitive and hurtful, and I by no means would say or insinuate that she was at all to blame."

Also in the original statement she said something about the girl wasn't a virgin. So no biggie if you're not a virgin!

Ugh

Sass71 said...

I thought the guys put something in her drink and bragged about it, or is that a different case?

Anonymous said...

First and foremost, no one deserves to be raped under any conditions.

However, it COULD have been worse. The victim could be dead. That happens. People get drunk, get assaulted, and then get killed as to not leave behind witnesses.

Was Serena's wording poor? Yes. Do I think she's saying the girl deserved to be raped? No.

Did the girl deserve assault? No. Did she possibly put herself in a bad spot? Yes.

Robert said...

She retracted--kind of, sort of--this morning, issuing a statement that the remarks she "supposedly made" to Rolling Stone had been "inappropriate" and "hurtful."

On that same subject, I firmly believe that there can never, ever be even the slightest excuse for rape. But I do sometimes wonder what the hell people are thinking when they put themselves into positions in which that kind of attack is much, much more likely to occur. An underage teenage girl at a party, drinking (which she had no business doing in the first place), and not only drinking, but drinking so much that she basically lost consciousness completely. Does that excuse the rapists? Of course not. If the girl hadn't put herself into that position, however, that rape, at least, might not, even probably would not have occurred.

It's called taking personal responsibility for one's actions, something that younger Americans seem not to have been taught to do. In some cases people do things almost as heedless, even stupid, as would be, say, running out onto a firing range on which dozens of shooters are blazing away with guns. If one was stupid enough to do that, one might reasonably expect to get shot.

__-__=__ said...

KPeony - totally agree with all of that. Put the animals away forever. And everyone, men and women, need to watch their drinking at all times. That girl could easily be killed by those animals. And same can happen to boys. There are sad, sad places in this world.

Susan said...

Robert - 100 percent agree with you. Very well put.

phoenix said...

Serena could have worded her statement much better, but I get what she was trying to say. The girl who got raped went well beyond tempting fate. An ounce of prevention..

CanadianMiss said...

STFU!

SusanB said...

Serena has been hit in the head with one too many tennis balls.

And @Robert - I understand what you're saying. These jerks need to be put away for years and years, but damn, don't put yourself in a stupid situation. There are areas in town where I SHOULD be able to walk down the street at 2:00 am, but it would be putting myself in danger of being raped, robbed and murdered if I did so. It's not right, but you have to protect yourself.

trsalka said...

What saddens me and makes me incredibly mad is that when I talk to ppl around me about cases like this, ppl I consider friends their reaction is: well she brought it on herself, what did she expect?
And more shockingly (to me) it is almost always women with this kind of reaction! Like she is obviously a slut and something like that could never happen to me cause I am so much better than her.

phoenix said...

@trsalka, brought it on herself in the sense that she completely threw caution to the wind and paid a price for it, not that she's a slut. Engaging in high risk behavior is, well.. risky.

Kara said...

It's a really touchy subject. I used to give lectures on the subject when I was in college. I would give talks at the frats because none of the other women from my organization would - but really? Who needs this info most?!?!?!

Anyway, it's really hard to explain that you need to protect yourself without coming off like you're victim blaming. I wouldn't recommend trying unless you've practiced. But yes - I should be able to get sloppy drunk wherever I want without fear of rape. But obviously getting sloppy drunk at home, alone is much safer than with a bunch of entitled feeling highschool jocks.

Wait. I'm almost 40. I'm probably safe sloppy drunk with high school jocks too.

Bacon Ranch said...

Why are they asking her about a rape case?

amanda_jf said...

You should be able to walk down the street naked and expect not to be raped. No one, in any circumstance should be abused and blamed for it.

Ari said...

I blame it all on their parents, both sides

Sugar said...

I don't know about y'all but I never go into any situation thinking someone I know might rape me. I feel like I should be able to get as drunk and stupid as I want to and not have to worry about getting raped by a friend or acquaintance.

Sugar said...
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nevermindthat said...

Like my HR boss used to always tell me; you can think it but don't say it. What an insensitive bitch she is. She knew she was out of pocket with that comment and that's why she has already issued an apology.

missmol said...

Sass- I believe I saw that also, that she was drugged. Kids for generations have been putting themselves in situations that are not optimal. The difference is that back then it was pushed under the rug and blamed on the girl.
The message that seems to be that if you are a female and go to a party, the guys can drink but the girls shouldn't so they can stop the guy from doing something bad. Personal responsibility goes both ways, and anyone under 21 shouldn't have been drinking. (Comment a little tounge in cheek, as most high school parties have some level of drinking). Now this topic would have been a great question for the Miss USA contestants to answer!LOL

skimpymist said...

I agree that the rape was not the girls fault but she did put herself in a bad position and made many bad choices which led up to the rape. I'm not blaming her and I know it wasn't her fault but if she had never snuck out to party and drink that would not have ever happened. Parents don't set rules just for the fun of it, they do it to protect you from bad mistakes.

yvettie said...

Well if you're 16 and you're out getting trashed your already doing something you shouldn't be. You need to be more careful. But also that doesn't give guys an excuse to rape. But you can't expect society to take care of you either because you're making stupid decisions.

MsPink Kitty said...

Women should protect themselves. No, we can not walk down the street naked and expect to be left alone. Could oyu walk downt he street dressed as a map and not expect anyone to ask you directions?

Some men/noys are worthless pieces of shit who will use any excuse to attack you. Why get fucked up drunk and pass out in their presense? Not one person tried intervene and stop what was happening. This speaks volumes about society today!

If you can't hold your liquor, why are you getting so drunk at a party where the other girls leave you alone to get raped, and some of the boys are preditors, and others looked the other way while you were beign violated? I would have far more sympathy for the victim if she didn't make herself a human target.

Everyone at the party failed the victim, including herself.

Patty said...

Bad choices lead to bad consequences. Simple as that. No one ever deserves an assualt of any kind. She did not deserve nor ask for it. However, when you mix kids and alcohol bad things usually happen.

phoenix said...

"Everyone at the party failed the victim, including herself."

Truth +1

FlirtyChick74 said...

+1w/Robert

just curious said...

I don't think Serena articulate herself well in the interview. I understand her point but there's a reason why celebs have publicists.

parissucksliterally said...

She of course is backtracking today.

just curious said...



Serena writes on her personal blow

“What happened in Steubenville was a real shock for me. I was deeply saddened. For someone to be raped, and at only sixteen, is such a horrible tragedy! For both families involved – that of the rape victim and of the accused. I am currently reaching out to the girl’s family to let her know that I am deeply sorry for what was written in the Rolling Stone article. What was written – what I supposedly said – is insensitive and hurtful, and I by no means would say or insinuate that she was at all to blame."
"I have fought all of my career for women’s equality, women’s equal rights, respect in their fields – anything I could do to support women I have done. My prayers and support always goes out to the rape victim. In this case, most especially, to an innocent sixteen year old child.”

just curious said...

Shouldn't a woman have the right to speak her own mind? Be it Serena or Melissa or even Paula Deen? As long as they say the right things?

just curious said...

So does Martina Hingis.
And Martina Navatronlva(?) , you know the French bitch. Did anyone ever 2nd guessed that she didn't eat coochie? That's a manly bitch.

just curious said...
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Victoria said...

Just heard on the local (Steubenville) news that Williams issued a retraction of sorts...she says she's "reaching out" to the victim.

It will be interesting to see what the local reaction will be.

Rose said...

What vile comments. If she wants to play the blame game why not blame the parents since she was 16 and they should have taught her?

I do think it's important to always be aware of your surroundings and take security precautions. That is for your own protection though, not because if you don't you deserve something bad to happen to you or you asked for it.

You are much more likely to be raped by someone you know than by a stranger at a party.

figgy said...

+2W/Robert

Elissa said...

Wow, tough crowd here today. I'm stunned at those people who believe that this girl brought this on herself.
She's a teenager, who went to a teenage party with other teenagers. How many of us have NOT done that?? Why do so many people expect a 16-year-old to anticipate being raped, when adult women can't even do that??

Tae Scott said...

First let me say the boys DID deserve what they got but I get what Serena is saying in the fact she put her self in a bad situation. I'm 18 I can say proudly I've never drunk alcohol and damn sure never got wasted. I hate when girls my age drink because so many bad things can happen. I think that what she trying to say but the virgin part was disrespectful.

Iceberg said...

@amanda_jf Amen.

aliciabutterfly said...

I was raped in uni by a friend when I was passed out drunk and I take my responsibility for that, even though I know that my chunk of ownership is about 1%. I flirted, I got drunk, and I went to sleep in a place that wasn't safe; I was pathetically naive and couldn't fathom that someone would feel like they deserved to take what was not given.

Point being is that sure there were a million little things we probably could have done that would have made the end of the story different but that's not what happened and when it comes down to it, a person (or persons) chose to use another person for sexual gratification when she couldn't/didn't give consent. Victim blaming is like holding a cell phone responsible for your cancer when you spent your childhood eating paint chips off the walls of buildings in Chernobyl.

Amartel said...

She's not blaming the girl for the rape, she's blaming her for being drunk and stupid. This is a fair point and it's unfortunate that it's characterized as "vile" or "heartless" when it's not. It's just telling the truth. Being drunk and stupid is risky. Bad people will take advantage of the situation.

kgirl said...

I understand what she was saying, I just think it was poorly worded. No, there's never an okay reason or excuse for rape; but people also need to make wise choices when it comes to getting into situations.

urban chaos said...

It's vile. If you read the case details, this sort of thing was happening and encouraged there. The girl was a target for breaking up with her bf. she was drugged and it was planned. The boy who called her up to go out had been asking her for a time and they were talking. Yes, she dank a lot and shouldn't ave but she was drugged!! Violated!! And then made out to be in the wrong!! Shameful!!


Those glass houses must be nice.

urban chaos said...

Oops, my apologies for the missed letters above. Point being, many of us have done something as innocent as walking down the street at night or drinking and getting into a cab, running down a less crowded park path. All potentials for a rape.. It's a slippery slope to point out what a victim could have or should have done differently..

Our scrutiny should be on those who committed such a heinous act.

phoenix said...

@Elissa, so she's entitled to act like a stupid teenager, getting undressed and passing out drunk, but the other teens at the party are supposed to be capable of acting like intelligent adults under the exact same circumstances? There is nothing tough about teaching your teens not to conduct themselves like anyone in this story did, including the victim. It's called being a responsible, loving parent.

DixieTheNoble82 said...

@aliciabutterfly - So sorry you had to go through that but thank you for sharing your experience and opinion. I went through something very similar and it enrages me to hear people say the typical crap about how the situation could of been avoided, etc. Yeah, maybe it could have and hindsight it 20/20. I agree with everything you said. Thank you again for sharing. Keep your head up!

crila16 said...

Serena is a moron, and that was the stupidest statement she could have made.

Mango said...

Bitch should just shut up and play tennis. That's what she gets paid for.



*"I am currently reaching out to Serena's family to let her know that I am deeply sorry for what was written above. What was written – what I supposedly said – calling her a bitch - is insensitive and hurtful, and I by no means would say or insinuate that she was at all to blame for her moronic comments."

kelly said...

she's standing up for the boys -- "do you think it's fair, what they got?"

that's the part that gets me -- feeling sorry for the poor boys who just made one little teensy mistake -- please. the texts alone are horrifying.

were they athletes? maybe that was why she was defending them. Or let's face it, maybe it's a race issue -- some of the boys were AA, and the girl was white.

with some people, the way they were raised, in the culture of their hometown or whatever, you just find this patriarchal culture of protecting young men. You would not expect a powerful young woman, a role model like Serena, to feel this way.

TheBarberLady said...

I think I understand what Serena was saying. Robert worded it best but this is what I think a lot people don't understand, Serena was raised in Compton, a notoriously bad neighborhood. I was a raised in a bad neighborhood. This lesson of self preservation begins very early. We saw ugly things, exposure to drunk /wasted people, people with mental health issues was a regular occurrance and the vigilant parents made their children aware very early in life. We knew being drunk was bad. We knew being around drunk men was dangerous cause my momma and especially my dad told us!! Not to mention we knew the neighborhood drunks/crackheads by name who were shameless but in some rare sober moments would warn us that we didn't want that life. I'm not saying that kids in our situation always pay attention and never do stupid things and pay a major price anyway. We know that's not true, but the mistakes that the girl made were outstanding to people like me.

kelly said...

@TheBarberLady you make a very good point about self preservation. that makes sense.

Now if we could just erase the stuff about her not feeling the sentencing was fair. . .

just curious said...

Maybe Serena should just stick to beating Whitegirls on the court . She does so much justice there.

Mari said...

In the 1970s the first serial rapist in Tel Aviv was on the prowl. The well meaning police chief suggested a curfew for women, for their protection. Prime Minister Golda Meir said "A curfew of men. It's a man that's the problem."
Her point was made. It's the same with anything curtailing the freedom of all; nobody execpting a criminal is responsible for their actions. Hell, I've been at parties with plenty of passed out drunks I didn't roll for their money. Having said that I've also called the cops to come help girls passed out at the side of a path at Uni. The part I cannot fathom are bystanders who don't help out. Are a you stupid to drink until you pass out? Well, yes. But people do stupid things all the time, they should get the chance to smarten up.

auntliddy said...

Girl was 16. Shes gonna make loads of mistakes. This one just cost her dearly.

Mame Dennis said...

You know what that teenage girl was thinking... she was thinking she'd get drunk with her friends and have a good time.

Just like the guys were. Should they have worried about getting raped?

Rape culture people. Woman get jumped on for thinking/saying that all guys are potential rapists, but then we're supposed to not trust any men? Anyone who says the girl put herself in a bad situation is basically saying that ALL men have the potential to rape. That given a chance, most men will rape a woman.

smdh

8=====D - RememberKermitGosnell said...

I understand what Serena said and totally agree with Robert.

What would have happened if she had gone to a forest and a wolf critically wounded her? First, the wolf would be shot and obliterated, then she would be an example for others that some things must not be done alone or without security.

auntliddy said...

The most appalling thing this idiot said was her FEELING SORRY FOR THE RAPISTS!!!!!!! Who incidentally, not only raped her, but violated her with objects and URINATED on her!!!!!! And when her father called frantically looking for her, one if the rapists answered and laughed and said your daughter is great at sex!!!!!! So heres the father, frantically looking for his daughter he knows is being raped!!!!!! Men like that, who would act that way- yes they got exactly what they deserve. They arent fit to mix with us regular folks. Serena's disgusting for saying this. No wayvshe can walk this back, no f*cking way.

Anonymous said...

YOU CAN ONLY TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU GET PAID TO DO. MANGO SAID SO! SO WE BETTER STOP TALKING ON CDan RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE WE'RE ALL STUPID BITCHES FOR DOING SO! EXCEPT MANGO, BECAUSE HE/SHE IS SO FUCKING SMART!

WTF.

kelgela2 said...

I know what she's trying to say. I understand what she's trying to say.

fenster said...

I agree with Mari, 100%.

phoenix said...
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phoenix said...

@Mame Dennis, I'm sure no one who attended the party thought about or expected a rape.
It was the volatile combination of young teens, liquor, and no supervision that enabled the unthinkable to occur.
My point: BOTH the girl AND the boys who attacked her put themselves in a bad situation that night.
To equate that with saying given a chance, most men will rape a woman is a rather cynical oversimplification.

Mame Dennis said...

@phoenix No. Your point is that men can't control themselves if unsupervised and drunk. But it's also the responsibility of the female to always be aware that a guy might not be able to stop himself. Because how do we know what their breaking point is?

If men can't control themselves from raping a woman when drunk, then maybe they are the ones who shouldn't drink and need supervision

Amartel said...

Do you "blame the victim" when they drive drunk into a wall and sustain injury/death?

Can you possibly step back and consider that getting blind drunk at a party was risk-inviting behavior. And, no, this does not excuse the rapists. Try holding these two thoughts in your head at the same time. You can do it!

phoenix said...

@Mame, um no, lol.. that's your point. My point is that UNDERAGE TEENS in general can't be trusted if unsupervised and drunk, and that everyone who attended the party that night put themselves in a bad situation. Rape isn't the only, or even the worst problem that could arise from a situation like that. Any girl or boy could have driven from the party and killed someone to cite just one example.

Mame Dennis said...

@phoenix But we're not talking about those other things. We're talking about rape. And who is at fault or who should've known better.

And, yes what you are saying is that all woman should consider drunk teenage boys to be potential rapists. How about murders too? Could that happen? Are they that much of animals that they can't stop their animal instincts?

Mame Dennis said...

@Amartel Driving drunk and injuring yourself is your fault. No one forced you into that wall except yourself

Getting drunk with friends and having those friends rape and violate you is very, very different. Can't you see that?

A better analogy would be... do you blame the mother who was out at 2am to get her baby diapers and a drunk driver slams into her and kills her? Because you know she shouldn't be out there on the road when there could be drunks! She put herself i that situation.

Flicknik said...

1) She's an idiot-but not entirely wrong.
2) Those scumbags belong in jail-for a long time.
3) The town of Steunbenville need to take a ling, long look in mirror.
However
4) When my friends (guys) get super drunk and get robbed or beaten up (both has happened many times) No one feels sympathy for them. NO ONE. Yet when a horrorable thing happens to a girl, it's completely off limits to discuss the victims actions. Why?

Mame Dennis said...

@flicknik Do you feel sympathy for them? Because I do. Unless they're getting beat up because they are out there starting fights in bars and just losing the fight.

HannahBanana said...

As a person who actually had this happen to her....mortified. It was a guy I was friends w/ would've never imagined he would spike my drink, & yes I was a virgin Serena, is it still my fault bitch? And worse, I got pregnant.....sometimes I have thought it would've been better to die then. At 17. I was drinking, yes, but I don't think that gives ANYONE the right to violate u.

HannahBanana said...

I'm so sorry to hear that happened to u. I can totally relate.

HannahBanana said...
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digal704 said...

Didn't the reporter ask the question? I don't think she randomly brought it up.

Cee Kay said...

Well, in theory you SHOULD be able to get as blind-drunk as you want and expect not to get assaulted or worse, but the fact is you CAN'T. The world we live in means that there *is* someone out there just waiting to take advantage of your vulnerability. What I'm teaching my daughter *and* my son is that when things get out of control, bad things happen. Period. Drunk is out of control. Why be stupid?

Janice M.(j_tothemenzy) said...
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HannahBanana said...

Teenagers tend not to be the smartest beings...I believe that is why ppl are required to care for them to a minimum of 18 years. I had 2 beers, I certainly wasn't "blind ass drunk". Well until the klonopin hit me.

John Viola said...

I'm a man and there is no amount of alcohol in the world that would make me force myself on a woman or make me think raping a woman, taping it, and humiliating her was ok. None. Not now at 30 or then at 16.

These boys had no morals before they were drunk. Excusing their behavior because they were drunk is sick. It's more defending of their actions.

Stop teaching our woman to be afraid of men and start teaching our men to respect women and not treat their bodies like objects.

feraltart said...

It is NOT the victim's fault. The males raped her & the bystanders let it happen. There is NO excuse for rape. There is no action, no way of dressing, no thought process whereby anyone should be raped. Regardless of how you are trying to spin it, the vast majority of you are blaming the victim. She did nothing to 'deserve' or 'bring on' a rape. The fault lies with the rapists. The blame lies with the rapists. The shame lies with the RAPISTS.

John Viola said...
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J.Menz said...
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John Viola said...

@HannahBanana, I'm so sorry what's happened to you. I hope you've moved on and healed. It was not your fault.

abob said...

This is incredibly disappointing from someone like Serena who is a woman at the top of her game and constantly gets called manly for being a powerful woman. You'd hope she'd have more awareness of how women can be treated in this aspect.

An invitation to sex is an invitation to sex, being unconscious is not an invitation to sex. If there is no active consent, via words or actions, it is sexual assault. What's so difficult about that?

I used to get blind drunk at parties when I was 16 but everyone looked after each other. If someone was sick water and toast would be found etc. The social media element of this case is so disturbing.

HannahBanana said...

Thank u John, I appreciate that. Time heals all wounds luckily. Tho sometimes they still ache, all these years later. I agree 100% w/ ur other comments as well.

HannahBanana said...

The details of what they did to that girl are just unbearable....I sincerely hope that those boys meet the same violation & humiliation in prison, daily. Because there is no way she will ever fully get over this. Serena Williams needs to keep her thoughts to herself on this matter. I'm sure the family is just thrilled that she brought this up in her interview, for no doubt MORE money & attention. Next up, boys will be boys....yuck.

auntliddy said...

Mame: word

auntliddy said...

Fluck, that is one tough crowd you run with.

auntliddy said...

Hanna, i am sooo sorry this happened to you.

sparkles said...

I'm sitting here in tears at all of these insensitive comments about what happened to this girl and all of the people raped in this horrible world we live in.
In this case it was a premeditated assault because she broke up with her bf,it wasn't because she got sloppy drunk and they took advantage,she was taken to a party,her drink was spiked,she was raped,there were photos taken and put online,there were fb and twitter posts about it.
I'm disgusted that some of you think she in some way brought it on herself.
SHE is the victim and those boys were only sorry when they got caught and put in the international spotlight by anonymous.
Makes me sick that the whole town tried to cover it up.
God bless her and all the other rape victims in the world.

Kerry Ann said...

This is what I don't get. Everyone keeps talking about 'risky' behavior but then will turn around and say these were otherwise 'good' kids. No prior criminal records etc. And these kids aren't the only ones. This happens all the time.

People will use analogies like getting drunk around men is just as dangerous as walking through a high crime area at night and flashing your expensive jewelry.

Think about what you're saying. Really think about it. You're saying that we as a society have accepted that all all men must be viewed as potential rapists. That a few drinks could make them unable to control themselves. Or that they are too morally bankrupt to understand what rape is.

But that's not what you think you're saying. You're saying that woman have control over whether or not they're victims

The latter is just wrong and victim blaming.

Anonymous said...

I'd agree with you but the bit about did they deserve the sentence they got followed by the girl put herself in the position clearly is her saying their sentences weren't fair as some blame Is with the victim.
Seriously girls if 16 do get drunk with their friends, what happened here was then every safeguard went out to that meant these scumbags took advantage of her vulnerable position. Her friends didn't look after her, others didn't stop the assult. No one is to blame but the rapists.

Anonymous said...

Word @auntyliddy also I'm sure there was other girls drunk and these parties, if not her these rapists would have prayed on one of them instead. They picked her because she was vulnerable and because they think that raping and violating someone is funny.

Amartel said...

You are the one who is primarily responsible for yourself. Not other people, not the government, not mom and dad.
As such, you should not get falling down drunk. Male or female. Just don't do it.
The rapists are responsible for the crime of rape.
But you are responsible for you.
This reasoning does NOT imply that "all men are rapists" (not even when you think really hard) so please stop trying to push that "logic."
Stop trying to extricate yourself from reality.
We do not live in a glass bubble. Actions have consequences.
Dumb actions have regrettable consequences.

Sherry said...

Agreed Robert. I think her words didn't look right in print and she made an effort to clear that up. I don't for a second think Serena would ever condone a woman being raped simply because they weren't a virgin.

I think we should read the interview first.

@aliciabutterfly: Being you passed out DOES NOT give someone carte blanche to rape you. Period. I know you've moved on but you are not to blame ever. And ya know what, screw taking responsibility for being drunk. They took advantage of you and you're just not to blame AT ALL!!!

And seriously is it stir shit up day? These postings are very irresponsible in they way they are worded and how they appear to be starting an argument among people. What? Not enough clicks for the new owners (Daily Mail)?

I can put up with people being nasty to one another but this is crap with the wordings on the articles. That's going to drive away readership faster than anything you freakin' idiots who are now writing this blog.

HannahBanana said...

Thank u auntliddy

Kerry Ann said...

@amartel, I never said all men are rapists. Never.

I said we're treating them as such. But you're too stubborn to look at the other side of it. "Don't get fall down drunk, with anyone, even your male friends with no past criminal record or record of rape... still don't trust them though! Because they may rape you." Just think about that. We are condoning victim blaming when we say that. So that guy who is a rapist gets away with it because a lot of the time a woman won't report it because she thinks it's her fault - because we've told her - drink and this could happen to you and she should've known not to trust drunk men ever! We are protecting and abiding that guy. He thinks all guys must do this, right? I mean why tell women not to trust drunk guys then.

You shouldn't get fall down drunk because it is dangerous for your health. Getting drunk does not mean a woman is responsible for her rape. Ever.

phoenix said...

@Mame Dennis, I don't appreciate you twisting my words, repeatedly interpreting for ME what I'M saying. It's intellectually dishonest, and you know it. Let's get back to my original point which I stand by:

BOTH the girl AND the boys who attacked her put themselves in a bad situation that night.
To equate that with saying given a chance, most men will rape a woman is a rather cynical oversimplification.

You were wrong. Deal with it :)

HannahBanana said...

Ohhhhhhhhhh ok, now I get it, 16 yr old girls should not go to parties because it's always a bad situation. Brilliant. Glad u cleared that up. The girl in question specifically was DRUGGED NOT DRUNK. It was done intentionally by those specific boys. I do hope that is not the norm.

Sugar said...

I'm so sorry about what happened to you Hannah. And of course it's not your fault. Xo

Mame Dennis said...

@phoenix, lol you just say 'you're wrong' and you win. World doesn't work that way.

I never said given a chance men will rape. I said the logic that woman shouldn't get drunk around men is what that statement is implying.

Don't ever go into a neighborhood with a high crime rate or you may get robbed - is implying there is a high chance that there are thieves there. Don't ever get drunk around men or you can get raped - is implying there is a high chance that a man will rape you.

It's pretty simple to understand.

And those boys didn't put themselves in a 'bad' situation. They raped, tortured, humiliated, and AFTER that night continued to harass that girl. They didn't make a bad decision to drunk dial their ex-girlfriend or spray paint the school walls. They committed a heinous crime.

Raping someone is not a bad situation and being drunk is not an excuse to rape.

HannahBanana said...

Thank u for restoring my faith in men. :) will u marry me?? LOL!!!

HannahBanana said...

Thanks Sugar. XoXo

Bubbles said...

I don't know if anyone is saying that we as a society are making it as if men can't control themselves if they have a few too many drinks, but we're not even talking about men. We're talking about kids who think laws and rules apply to everyone else but them and nothing bad will ever happen to them because they're young and will live forever. So to think they're dealing with all of the possible scenarios and consequences at that age isn't being realistic, because they often aren't dealing in reality themselves.

Now if this was done to humiliate the girl for breaking up with her bf, then this is a premeditated act and should have been treated as such in the sentencing. I hope those little assholes rot.

HannahBanana said...

And to u as well Dixie, I'm so sorry. I must say, somehow it's comforting to hear from ppl who understand what happened to us.

Bubbles said...

Oh and since when did Martina Navritilova become French? I remember her defecting, but doubt she would have defected from France.

HannahBanana said...

Amen.

phoenix said...

@Mame, clearly you know it all, so I'm done.

By the way, there's no need to lock your doors or windows or car etc from now on because you've got all potential consequences under your superior control, right? Cya

Mame Dennis said...

@phoenix, you're done, but you have to get the last word in. lol

HannahBanana said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mame Dennis said...

@bubbles, sadly, this sort of rape isn't limited to kids. It happens on college campus (99% legal adults) and in the adult world too. A few years ago, I dealt with a friend who went out after work, late 20s, had a few too many drinks. Not fall down drunk by any means. A male coworker offered to drive her home and raped her in his car. When she reported it, the cops asked her if she was drunk and then told her the DA probably wouldn't prosecute because she had a few too many.

That's what telling women not to drink and not telling men not to rape does to our culture.

phoenix said...

@Mame, au contraire, and you did it again. You just got the last word in while in the same breath accusing me of it. This isn't an attempt to get that last word myself. Talking in circles isn't my thang. Have at it.

Mame Dennis said...

@phoenix, lol You can't help yourself.

lazyday603 said...

I can't wait to hear Danica Patrick's and Mary Lou Retton's take on this. We never get enough of athletes weighing in on the national news.

Mame Dennis said...

@bubbles, I think it's not about locking your doors to avoid rape, but rather attempting to say that anyone who thinks putting responsibility on the drunk woman for getting raped is wrong, should just leave all their doors unlocked because they don't care about risks!

But here's the thing. When someone has their house robbed, the police don't ignore the crime or tell them no one will believe them because they left their doors unlocked. People still believe them that they were robbed. They don't say "Are you sure you didn't ask to be robbed and then regretted it later?" When the robber is convicted, people don't say, "Oh well that's not a fair sentence! The house was unlocked! They were asking for it!"

Mango said...

@ Layna Day re your 12:07 pm post - I'm glad someone FINALLY understands!!!

ethorne said...

LAYNA STOP BEING SO LITERAL and TAKE A FUCKING XANAX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

MadLyb said...

Some of the worst rape apologists are women, sadly enough.

auntliddy said...

Martina is russian

Jenn said...

I personally don't think Serena has been hit in the head with enough tennis balls. I'm willing to smack her with a couple hundred to help her meet her quota, and to shut her the fuck up.

That girl was 16.. I just cannot imagine the horror, she feels.

The attempted cover up made me sick. Again, STFU, Serena, go play tennis.

surfer said...

Wrong Aunt Liddy. Martina is from Prague, Czech Republic. Not Russia.

just curious said...

The bitch was still manly from the broad shoulders all the way down to her thighs. The fact that she used to vocally criticise the Williams sisters AFTER they started winning shows what kind of person she was. Her abd the Hingis bitch said some cold shit about Serena.

Prolly tried to get between Serena's thighs but her advances got re-buffed.

B said...

This is an example of the rape culture we live in. It deeply pisses me off to hear women victim blaming. Serena you don't have to be a virgin or drunk. This could happen to you!

April Walsh said...

To everyone defending Serena's original statement...

Having read the stuff the Anons put out at the time, the girl in question was coerced and drugged by people she thought were her friends, but who were actually trying to get some sick revenge on her for dumping one of their buddies. I was a very tame teenager, but I could see myself being coerced to a party with people like that to feel accepted and I have been in situations where I made bad choices and, thankfully, I had actual friends looking out for me as this poor girl didn't (also, I wasn't a pretty teen). Lucky for me, nothing happened.

But this WASN'T the case for Steubenville. She was tricked and drugged, not just too drunk. This was all planned ahead and acted out against her. I see no reason to blame her even the tiniest bit.

I don't agree with what Serena was saying even IF the girl had been drunk of her own accord (again, she was not) as getting drunk should not be a rapable offense, but still Serena (and most people hearing this story, it seems) didn't bother to look up the facts that Anonymous put out for all to see before shooting off opinions.

I don't think this makes Serena a horrible person. I remember when I said judgmental things similar to this. Then I matured and stopped being a dick. I hope she grows and matures and changes her POV as victim-shaming tends to make "rape culture" worse.

Anonymous said...

I WAS NOT TALKING TO YOU, ETHORNE!

People get asked their opinion and when you don't like it, you go to the lowest dominator. SERENA'S A MAN! SHE'S RETARDED! I'D KILL HER! ALL SHE KNOWS IS TENNIS, THE TRANNY WHORE!

Yeah, that'll teach her.

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