Thursday, September 12, 2013

Your Turn

David Tutera and his husband split. A judge ordered that the couple each will be given custody of one of their twin children. So, the pair will be split forever. Do you agree that twins or any siblings for that matter should be split up in a divorce?

50 comments:

Unknown said...

wtf? No.

FSP said...

I was split between paper and plastic.

Tish said...

I have never heard of this happening before. It is especially cruel to split twins. I wonder why they can't just have joint custody.

VIPblonde said...

Just wait until they go to summer camp!

Rose said...

Someone should rent the Judge Parent Trap. Why can't they split custody of both twins? If they weren't twins would they each take just one? Moron.

Anonymous said...

how u split TWINS?!!!
THATS INSANE

veee said...

who was the judge? solomon? this is a mess.

Lurker Girl said...

I am sure it's for tax purposes --so they can claim a child each. I doubt that visitation has them totally split--I'm sure there is a shared parenting plan in place. NO judge would physically split up children without due cause.

L'auteur said...

I'm a twin and cannot imagine being split from my brother. Wow, what a stupid decision.

L'auteur said...

I'm a twin and cannot imagine being split from my brother. Wow, what a stupid decision.

Master of the House said...

Seriously.

Pink Cashmere said...

OMG! That's horrible. As a parent, I would let the other person have both and get visitation. I can't imagine splitting up any children, esp twins.

Tru Leigh said...

What's the judges name? Can we mount a recall?

Christopher Cruz said...

Disgusting.

Unknown said...

Legally, that's all the judge could do. Each child went to his biological father. The twins, while they may have grown in the same womb, are not "twins".

SuSu said...

My ex wanted to split up our kids...the one he didn't want is now his "favorite" -- people are crazy, this judge needs to be removed.

Jonathan Andrew Sheen said...

We know nothing about the kids or their relationship in this case... Or, really, any hypothetical future case.

Judges should decide based on specifics unique to each case.

Seven of Eleven said...

@Lurker Girl, nope, it's true. The twins were conceived via surrogate using donor eggs and the sperm of both men, and each child is the biological child of each of the men. The judge granted the bio father custody of his child. The Daily Mail article is headlined "I'm mourning the loss of a second child" (Tutera).

cool cool cool said...

The babies are half-siblings who shared a womb and a mother. They're approaching three months old so if they're going to be split up, now's the time.

It's not very different from a woman donating several eggs to different families and babies resulting who will never see their half-siblings. I don't think this is a big deal at all. I'd feel differently if the babies were full siblings or if Tutera and his husband had split up after the babies were born, but this fight has been going on since before their birth.

Glitter said...

Terrible decision.

Unknown said...

Siblings are not possessions. They are children who need each other right now.

NomNom83 said...

Nothing like losing both a parent AND your twin b/c of divorce.

I'm completely serious, someone needs to think about the children.

Jesus. What a fuck-up.

Kelly said...

Ah. I didn't know they were half siblings. Still, that is awful they're being split up anyway.

Eros said...

Not cool at all. =(

MISCH said...

No this is awful

auntliddy said...

Dont like it either but prob best judge cld do under the circumstances. These babies will never know they are so called twins unless told. Still, a pretty mess.

urban chaos said...

Regardless of conception, these kids didn't ask to be conceived so they shouldn't be split. Why the heck can't they share custody? The parents are assholes for not putting their shit to the side and thinking of the LO's best interests.

Lurker Girl said...

wow--I didn't know they only shared half DNA. That must have been fun to figure out during implantation--knowing that not all of the eggs survive. I'm sure DNA tests were run and all--but still totally shitty to do that to kids. Wonder what "Rent-a-womb" thinks of this...but I'm sure she was paid enough to shut up and go away.

Clanger said...

that is RIDICULOUS to split twins. How traumatic, and sorry, but that judge really should be ashamed.

Alexa Rose said...

Agree with Lurker Girl, this is probably done for tax reasons. Was this done in a state where one parent has to be labeled as having primary custody even if it is a 51/49 split? At least I hope this is the case, siblings shouldn't be split up like this.

veee said...

taxes reasons aren't an issue. parents filing separately (whether divorced or just prefer to file separate) can either just agree who claims which child OR have a court order indicating who claims which child (often one parent claims in even years, one is odd years). custody not an issue for tax purposes.

WareCat said...

my mom's sister is the biggest POS on the planet.
she had 5 kids, gave the youngest 3 up to the state & kept the older 2.
that shit did not fly w/ my grandparents. they stepped in & gained full custody of 3 toddlers, while they were in their mid '50s & raised them. so my cousins are legally my uncle/aunts.

TV Junkie said...

As a mother of twins, I can't imagine ever splitting them up! Mine are fraternal, and are very different, so as my dr says, they just shared the same space for a while. I don't believe this situation makes these poor children any less twins, and if either one of these assholes gave a damn about these kids, they would do everything in their power to keep these children, suck it up & be civil adults! This seriously pisses me off. I work really hard to be civil with my ex husband for my kids' sake, and will never understand why most people don't!

TV Junkie said...

*keep them TOGETHER, not just keep them. Sheesh!

crila16 said...

HELL NO!!!

crila16 said...

HELL NO!!!

Unknown said...

This will be so damaging to the children. Divorced parents of twins split custody, not the kids. This will be ruinous as any twin will tell you. The judge might as well ordered the kids to death because two selfish gays can't share.

BotoncitoRosa said...

Ok, different dads for each of these newborns but what about the mother, the eggs where from two different mothers as well?

Sunny said...

VIP
I am laughing so hard the tears came. Perfection!

I am having phone difficulty so forgive me if this was mentioned, but I read on the DM that they did this because each twin had a different bio dad. Ummm, what? How is that possible

Oh, and this sucks. Splitting up multiples is something I would expect from a Gosselin. Get it together, gentlemen!!

Sunny said...

Oopsy! Sorry for the echo :)

NaughtyNurse said...

Absolutely NOT. They are children, not a living room set or dogs!! These are people who had children as accessories.

Interplanet Janet said...

Oh my God NO! I can't believe that any judge would DO that!!!!!!!

Interplanet Janet said...

Okay - I just read the whole story. The kids are fraternal twins. The daughter is biologically David's and the son is biologically Ryan's. So the babies are going with their biological fathers. However, both David and Ryan have said that they want the brother and sister to be in each others' life and they plan to make it so. Not perfect, but better than the headline.

Bit dams said...

Wow. Child custody laws are really behind technology. Sad and unfair for the kids.

Moosefan said...

They are children FFS. NOT the cabin by the lake. Tis judge is an idiot and so are they.

Moosefan said...

They are children FFS. NOT the cabin by the lake. Tis judge is an idiot and so are they.

eish said...

This is so massively fucked up.

eish said...

This is so massively fucked up.

eish said...

@interplanet Janet I read the same thing on TDM. Each child is technically each fathers' child. You have two men who provided their sperm to a donor and now they think their kids are property. Way to go, guys. This is a classic example of why people think gays don't make good parents!

Henriette said...

I have fraternal twins and would never dream of splitting them up. Of course, they are full siblings and not via surrogate or donor eggs.

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