Thursday, October 17, 2013

Kris Jenner Needs A Favor

Kris - (in a very drunken voice) Kim I need a favor. You are going to love it.
Kim - (while cruising from one mirror to another in her room) What is it?
Kris - I need you to pose half naked and Instagram it. Also, try and get Kanye to pretend he likes it.
Kim- Why wouldn't he like it?
Kris - I don't have time to talk about that now I just hired an 18 year old male stripper and mama needs a tequila shot off his body. Can you take a photo and post it? I need to take away some of the bad publicity that keeps raining down on me from every one not named Harvey. Hang on honey. (in the background you can hear Kris yelling, "Grind it. Yeah, show me how you use it. That is what I call a gold medal. Your name isn't Bruce is it kid?")
Kim- I have lots of photos ready to go. What do you think I do all day?
Kris - I thought you might be playing with North.
Kim - Who?
Kris- Your kid
Kim- Oh yeah. I should go find her.
Kris- So what kind of photos do you have?
Kim- Everything from full spread naked to bikini to topless. Just like you taught me.
Kris- Something classy. Make it something in white.  (in the background you hear Kris saying, "Is that real? It's so so big.") I have to go Kim.

75 comments:

Cheryl S said...

Really? She needs to stop.

Bacon Ranch said...

QUIT WITH THE K's!

..and dayamn. I've owned horses with smaller fannies.

Anonymous said...

Her ass is huge. she is a beautiful woman but her ass is giving me nausea and Im not pregnant yet

Harry Knuckles said...

KPig has a fat ass.

Anonymous said...
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Meanie Rhysie said...

Anyone else hear "Fat-bottomed girls"? ;)

But what freaks me out is the blonde hair.

ethorne said...

So I guess since it's a slow news day the Enties are just gonna troll.

Pip said...

She looks horrible with that hair color.

Anonymous said...

She is pulling a JLo

MontanaMarriott said...

LMAO, good one Enty lol

FSP said...

Side boob!

Bacon Ranch said...

Haha Mwl Baby, all I heard was
Oh MY Gawd
Becky, look at that butt.

Then a whinny.

Bacon Ranch said...

Finds
Sideboob
Pleasing

Just make sure not to disrupt the herd. Don't need a stampede.

FSP said...

Yes
I
Do

Susan said...

I can't bother reading this because my eyes glaze over whenever I see Kardash.....

And I'm about to break my cardinal rule about saying I don't give a fuck about something on this blog, because I find that to be incredibly rude, but I'm at my breaking point. I DON'T FUCKING CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Apologies to those who are offended. It needed to be said. I will go back to my ignorance is bliss regarding the K's. Serenity now.

audrey said...

Oh My. There are towns in this world smaller than that butt.

8====D KermitGossnellKnobjob said...

So this is Kimberly K. I thought she was Snooki.
I don't know what is worst, the fact that I'm probably blind or that I know who those both chicks are.

Paint Chips said...

At first glance it looks like she's wearing granny panties which have unfortunately ridden up.

Mari said...

Lord, go look after Kovered Kar Seat, idiot woman.

MISCH said...

this whole family is gross

Unknown said...

Now this is what I call a tumor booty!

Unknown said...

Now this is what I call a tumor booty!

Brian said...

Mudshark Midget with a fat butt. Face is pretty but having sex with her would be like having sex with a pail of water.

Seachica said...

I think Kim K took one of the photos of the guy with diseased balls and inverted it.

SueRH said...

She is fat. That is not attractive.

Seachica said...

Testing out my new icon (this thread inspired me)

Tempestuous Grape said...

You have way too much time on your hands.

Tempestuous Grape said...

Oh, and SueRH, choke on a bag of dicks, you sow.

Orvilla Bedinbacher said...

I hate side boob! My man is like it works for me...jeez ;)

@MelOncholy @PIP I have no idea why you would destroy that beautiful black hair for that busted Clairol color.

Also, Kim is by no means fat! That's just crazy. Yeah, she has a big butt but fat. Really?!?! Okay.

__-__=__ said...

She's hiding her front butt! Stubby legs, cankles, beyond fat thighs and enough butt for several people. Kimmode has out done herself!

Harry Knuckles said...

Gawker is saying that shortly after KPig posted this pic to Instagram, Kanye tweeted back "HEADING HOME NOW". Apparently Kanye became aroused when he saw the pic and wanted to have sex with KPig.

Unknown said...
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Mari said...

Or he figured she was on the way to ER since she needed to wear one of Kompass' cloth diapers.

Unknown said...

Who gets a pic of themselves taken while taking a selfie??

SueRH said...

Whatever, Moriah. She's fat.

Hanwi said...

She might be fat if your ideal is skeletal.

But still, gross!

Anothergrayhare said...

Is this what Apple Bottomed Jeans means? Holy out of proportion butt. And the horse comment made me spit Diet Coke on my iPad.

Cory said...

Does anyone else think she is trying to transform into Beyonce? Ever since Kim colored her hair and changed her make-up she is starting to look more and more like her.

gr8p said...

Buttzilla

Renoblondee said...

Wow. I'm no fan, but y'all are cruel.

auntliddy said...

I actually like her blonde. But I have to agree, her butt is a tad large, but I think she likes that so enjoy!

Sylvia said...

HAHAHAHAHA

amused bush said...

As a black girl with a small butt, I would love to have a little bit of KK's.

Tori said...

This is what we call "thirsty."

Its just U said...

I can't stand the vacuous bitch but I think she looks good here. For a change. I like a big ass. I wanna smack it so hard cops could dust it for fingerprints.

parissucksliterally said...

EEEUUUWWWWWW. Her ass is NOT "big" - it is ENORMOUS. TOTALLY out of proportion with her body. I cannot fathom how anyone could find that ass to be sexy. Every woman I know would never ever ever want as ass that size!

West End Girl said...

Sigh. Y'know Enty, you could just NOT post about her and her rotten relations.

But lolol at her arse. I'm not slim but that's ridiculous and to think that's something she paid someone to do? S fool and their money are easily parted...

EpicBlonde said...

It is way to round and perfect to be real. An ass that big would come with a healthy dose of cellulite, fatty deposits, and sag.

Unknown said...

The Brazillian buttlift is working wonders. When gravity sinks in, it will look like a wet sack of potatoes in 20 years.

urban chaos said...

V, honey- hers is def bought and paid for. No way she sculpted that in the gym.

AW, much? and here we thought being a mom might bring out the Klass in you..hahahaha! even I cant type that with a straight face.

parissucksliterally said...

Epic blonde, you think it is perfect? You don't see cellulite? She has plenty! It is fake as hell, but "perfection" is not the word that comes to mind when I see her ass. "Gross" "ridiculous" "disgusting"......is more like it.

And before anyone yells at me for slamming her body parts, SHE PAID FOR THIS. IT IS NOT "SOMETHING SHE CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT."

She was such a beautiful woman in 2006 - she has got to be so incredibly insecure to have done this to herself.

Jason Blue Eyes said...

750,000 morons "liked" this on her Instagram so far.

Human beings suck.

parissucksliterally said...

Jason, maybe they "liked" it because the picture made them laugh?

TalksTooMuch said...

I like that picture and I think her bum looks awesome. H8tz gonna H8T

parissucksliterally said...
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parissucksliterally said...

If you are going to spew the "hater" bullshit, could you at least spell out the whole word? No one is a "hater" or "jealous" (which is usually the accompanying comment)

TalksTooMuch said...

So sorry, parissucksliterally, I would hate to be immature!!

People who hate; i.e. "Haters" are going to hate other people! No matter what! Is that clear enough for you? I don't know if they are jealous or not, maybe 888 could chime in?

sheit_ur_duinit_wrawng! said...

Google Bev Bighead from Rockos Modern Life and you will see KK in kartoon. Here in MILF:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkFxnZMXyCQ

Damn that ass is HUGE

No Agenda Groupie said...

This is not a selfie. Yes, she's holding a phone, but that's a pro photograph, w good lighting, heavily airbrushed.

Team kardashian leaves nothing to chance.

The before n after ass surgery
http://origin.realitytea.com/assets/uploads/2011/06/kim-kardashian-butt-implant.jpg

Anothergrayhare said...

Wow @no agenda, she really was beautiful. Why would she do that to herself. Oh wait, we are talking about her still, I guess it worked.

amused bush said...

@urban chaos - I know she paid for it, but I still wouldn't mind having a little more junk in my trunk (like plum to peach size). No amount of squats is going to overturn my genetics :)

Notorious W.i.g. said...

Damn Paris, settle the fuck down unless you're going to correct every ungrammatical or abbreviated comment. Which is plentiful with the posts as well.

MissInfo said...

She doesn't have butt implants, she received butt injections. Just please trust me on this one! ;-)

Notorious W.i.g. said...
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Gytrash said...

Ughh, now I feel horrible about myself after reading everyone's comments on Kim K. My bum is probably just as disproportionate to the rest of my body as hers, and I hate to think this is what everyone says about me when my back (or, er, bum) is turned.

Fairmaiden327 said...

Her body is hot. Face like a goat.

auntliddy said...

Gy, im sure no one says anything since u arent posting a near naked shot of your bum on twitter!!!!!!

Alexa Rose said...

How is it attractive that her underwear is in her crack? Gross. And her butt is massive and gross. Bleh. Go away please.

Aoife said...

Wasn't there a pic floating around of Kanye and his male friend taken in Paris earlier this year? I haven't been able to find it.

And I can't believe I read a Kartrashian item.

Orvilla Bedinbacher said...

@Gy as a girl with a big butt myself...no worries. Honestly, everyone can hate. It's no big. Blame hollywood for now turning the butt into the new boobs. Another thing for women to have to aim to have in order to be beautiful or sexy. stupid.

Kim isn't fat. No, she isn't my favorite person but by no means is she fat. I feel some people in this forum may need to watch Miss Representation. Think about why they really think she is FAT.

Giulians Rancic is too skinny and Kim is fat!??! Damn. In the words of Kanye 'that shit is cray'.

Wow, I just quoted Kanye. I need to go the corner and have a come to Jesus talk with myself;)

Orvilla Bedinbacher said...
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parissucksliterally said...

Notorious, W.i.g, sorry- I despise the term "hater", and when it is written "H8tr", it makes me stabby. That, and "my bad", are not terms an adult should use. People just sound really stupid when they do.

"You are such a hater" is used when there is no real argument for the person - just something to say.

Let's move on now. :)

Anonymous said...

MelencOly: yeah, the whe Queen video clip ran through my mind. I'd hate to see her on a bike. She'd swallow the seat.

Anonymous said...

Unless you are truly illiterate, or a 12 year old, there's no excuse for using H8ter crap. I mean, it's like when your great aunt tries to be "hip" and greets you with "cowabunga dudes! Party on"

TalksTooMuch said...

You're right, Rach Around, I am functionally illiterate. And old, apparently. I sure wish there were rules posted around here so people knew what was okay for posting! You know, just in case anyone gave a shite what randoms thought of their posts.

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