Tuesday, February 12, 2019

Your Turn

What is your cut off level for dating someone who has been convicted of a crime? Just a DUI or would you go all the way up to murder?

87 comments:

Brayson87 said...

Uh oh, Enty's cruising for ass again ;)

cc423 said...

HA!!! I was gonna say something along those same lines Brayson87

Flashy Vic said...

Depends how hot she is.

sandybrook said...

Well here's a good place to celebrate El Chapo getting convicted on ten counts in Brooklyn about 1\2 hour ago.

sandybrook said...

As far as this, a conviction forjaywalking is about my limit.

J said...

Way back when, I had a huge crush on this girl... maybe two years after college. We went out in groups a couple of times. Back then I was too shy to get anywhere with her. Anyway, a few years later she went to the slammer for embezzlement from her bank employer. I sometimes wonder where she's at now.

Bluestar said...

Don't come here for a week and mods are asking this?

Unknown said...

Suicide.
That's a deal breaker for me.

Brayson87 said...

Unknown is so vanilla.

@J, yeah white collar a$$ would probably be the way to go.

fnchrstphr said...

You dodged a bullet. What kind of moron steals from a bank?

Brayson87 said...

I think a prostitution conviction would be a red flag. Like I'm open minded but that would have to mess with your brain in a relationship. Murder, eh, depends on the circumstances.

Brayson87 said...

@fnc, Uh usually the people that run it.

J F said...

If more than one of their ex's has died mysteriously in the last 10 yrs, then that's a deal breaker for me.

Thorne said...

I would not date someone who has harmed another person physically, or at least done enough harm to have charges pressed.

J said...

I'd stay away from anyone with a record like Lorena Bobbitt, for example.

Farmgirl said...

The severity of the crime is directly proportional to the amount of time that has passed since. Baseline today is a parking ticket. 30 years ago, DUI. Any convictions for crimes involving bodily harm are disqualifying.

J F said...

@unknown... Especially if they were successful at it the sex would only be good for the 1st few weeks

:| raven |: said...

having a son who has been in the criminal system for drugs, theft, etc. it would depend. he's been arrested 32 times in his adult life. he is a good person. when he's clean, he's amazing.

so it depends on the crime and it depends on the situation.

however, murder? no. animal cruelty? hell NO! child abuse? hell to the fucking no.

Dorvannnn said...

It depends how good she looks in bikini.

But seriously I am surprised how stupid some of my fellow males can be when it comes to attractive woman.

Tricia13 said...

😂

gauloise said...

jaywalking, littering, going slightly over the speed limit, parking ticket

Ksmith said...

Depends on how he looks in a speedo

Count Jerkula said...

People wont date someone w/ a DUI in the past? Wtf?

I am pretty liberal on it, cause crazy broads throw good pussy, and they get locked up from time to time. Theft from family & friends would be a limit, but dui, drug charges, assaults, they all fine. This is only a dating scenario, not marriage.

J F said...

Exactly!! Aren't the banks the only ones allowed to steal?

... How Low can Wells FarGo?

fnchrstphr said...

Wells Fargo has excellent customer service. I wish I had started banking there years ago.

Dorvannnn said...

Following up on my earlier post....
I remember watching an episode of the ABC show "What Would You Do?" hosted John Quinones.
They had a segment where different people were trying to saw off a bike lock off a bike in order to steal it.
When it was the black man and the white man people were telling them to stop and that they were calling the police.
When it was an attractive white woman a few of the men continued to help her if after she admitted the bike wasn't hers.

:| raven |: said...

@Dorvan -

i've seen something similar, i.e. a woman, overweight, broken down car on the side of the road. NO one stopped to help her.

then a beautiful woman, falling out the top of her blouse, and men crashing cars to pull over to help her.

y'all are dogs.

and i say that lovingly.

Jimbonius said...

Woof woof

Hortensia said...

Any man over the age of 27 who has the emotional development of a 13 y.o. Convicted in the court of personal experience.

fnchrstphr said...

And they usually get caught.

Krab said...

I'm surprised about the DUI thing. I haven't been, but my son got in trouble for it. No one was hurt, though (other than his car). He was 19 and it was New Year's Eve. He's learned from his stupid mistake.

SDaly said...

Regicide.

Brayson87 said...

@raven, Well did you see any women pulling over to help either of those women in need? Did you pull over?
There are definitely basic bastards but just as many basic b!tches ;)

:| raven |: said...

@Brayson

no no no, i saw it on TV as an experiment. the two scenarios. therefore, i couldn't pull over to help the woman in need. :)

Henriette said...

Anything child related is a problem for me, but it really depends on the circumstances.

Henriette said...

As far as men are concerned, they will date anything beautiful. She could be a serial killing black widow who eats children for breakfast, but if she is a knockout, men will be lining up. I see that stuff all the time.

HkyMom said...

Anything kid abuse related or animal abuse related is a dealbreaker but anything else, even murder (might be self-defense, you don't know) can be discussed over dinner :-)

astra worthington said...

I wouldn’t date anyone charged or convicted of anything. I just don’t need the hassle. If you’re my friend, that’s different. Can’t tell you how many times I gave a friend a ride to court for possession or DUI or whatever. People do stupid shit, they make mistakes, but I’m not going to have a relationship with them.

Sd Auntie said...

Bankruptcy's, low fico score and Dui. No way. No how

William Lawrence said...

Enty, you got to be a chick. Only a chick would ask the question that way.

Aquagirl said...

I’ve never had to consider this question before. It’s difficult enough to meet someone who is intelligent, funny, and attractive without factoring in criminal history. I wouldn’t date anyone who has been convicted of any crime. I’ve never been so why would I want to accept that behavior from someone I’m going to date?

Donna said...

Hello Astra (and Freebird),

Speaking of criminals:

I posted more about the weekend I saw Sarah Hart and the kids at the ocean back over under that same post. Thanks for asking...

I have to edit that I had forgotten until after I posted my second reply that I also recall seeing Sarah leaving late the night they checked in, and also the next night. Late like 11pm or midnight. I remember thinking, well, maybe she's going to the casino. Because there is a big casino there just outside of town. And you wouldn't or couldn't take kids there...or to a bar. But casino stuck with me for some reason.

hunter said...

"they all fine"

ahhh Jerkula, you're special

timebob said...

Depends how hot their mug shot is.

Aquagirl said...

@Count: So what’s the marriage scenario?

astra worthington said...

Thanks Donna, I’ll go back to the post and read your comment! Appreciate it!

Lol SDaly! 😂

Freebird said...

I dated a murderer for 2 years. He was a dry drunk, though, and a con man. I was in love with his intellect. He was the only guy I’ve ever dated who was NOT good looking - AT ALL. But, he was bad news & I was just dating him cuz I was bored. I was really stupid to have dated him. And to have stayed with him for so long, when he treated me like garbage.

Unknown said...

I've seen those things happen on that show and in real life. Thanks for bringing it up. Good point

Count Jerkula said...

Aqua: cant marry crazy. Pot possession or Dui in their past, meh. Shoplifting, meh. Certain assaults, meh. Prostitution i wouldnt marry. Hard drug charges, pass. Probably anything where she locked up longer than a couple months i would pass.

Count Jerkula said...

Freebird: murdered before you dated him or after?

Nonya Bidness said...

Hard limit for assault, harassment, stalking, drugs, any abuse or bodily harm.

DUI or theft I would let slide if it was a stupid mistake in youth, like shoplifing or driving buzzed home from a party.

Doing any of that as an adult shows serious flaws in judgement - and I don't even wanna hook up with someone who has bad judgement or engages in risky behavior.

Freebird said...

Awesome, thank you!

Freebird said...

He served time for murder before I met him. He was drunk (it was during his drinking days) and it was self defense. He served about 10 years. He was not a violent person. Very mild mannered, but cunning. Very dangerously cunning.

Mrs Libnish said...

Hmmmmm...when I was younger, DUI didn't matter to me at all. But, my first husband had a DUI that I knew about. He later turned into a raging drunk and was just a dry drunk when I met him (big surprise). Fast forward 5 years, less than two months after we divorced, he got his FIFTH DUI when he hit someone and killed them. I didn't know about the other 3 DUIs when we got married. Found out about them when I read about the trial in the paper. Then he went to prison. He's dead now. Probably complications from drinking and diabetes. Long story short, if I was single, I would not date a person with a DUI for obvy reasons.

Freebird said...

And the murder happened at a person’s garage. They were drinking after a night out at the bar and the other guy got mad about something & went to stab him. The guy I knew picked up whatever was close by (a big wrench) and used it to swat st the knife. It hit the guy in the head & he died instantly.

Freebird said...

Nowadays, I’m not interested in dating. At all. I’m just not. 🤷🏼‍♀️ But, if I were, I think I’d have to judge on a case by case basis. I wouldn’t go near someone who ever was charged with Domestic Violence, Child Abuse, Sexual Assault of any kind, Animal Cruelty, or anything where the person is obviously a sociopath and lacks a moral conscience.
But, if it was weed possession or theft or something back in their past, I would look at what happened. And their attitude about it today.
I think we’ve all fucked up in our lives. Some get caught, some don’t. I’d hate for anyone to judge me by my mistakes only. So, I try to be empathetic & compassionate. But, not to a degree that it is unhealthy for me. I’m not an enabler.

Freebird said...

His name wasn’t Charlie, by any chance, was it?

Ann said...

I'm old. When I was younger a criminal background wouldn't have mattered. Today anything more than a parking ticket, jaywalking etc and it's hell to the no.

Cee Kay said...

I mean, I actually know somebody who has a murder conviction but it wasn't, like, "murder" murder. I would say a lot depends on the circumstances although really, anything more serious than say shoplifting in teens/young adulthood would probably make me think twice.

Count Jerkula said...

Freebird: No dating? Just hook ups on Tinder & Bumble?

What he get, 10yrs manslaughter, out in 7?

Freebird said...

I don’t remember the specifics. He conned his lady lawyer. Made her believe he was in love w her. I think he had a long sentence but was out in 10 years.

And no to any dating/hook ups. It’s just me, myself & I. Life is too complicated to also have to deal with relationship drama. Besides, my picker’s broken. So...maybe someday. When my life is more “together.” I’m currently being evicted & facing homelessness. That’s not something I need to bring to the table. 😂 I’m fine being single. Been this way for 6 years now. 🤷🏼‍♀️

astra worthington said...

J and frnch- I know someone who stole from the government! Money, and lots of it. Can you imagine? He was an arrogant asshole and spent 7 years in prison for it. He really thought he could get away with it! The old bumper sticker is correct: Don’t steal, the government hates competition!

HeatherBee said...

Deal breakers for me would be: animal, child, or elder abusers, felons, and anyone who does goat yoga. Like, who are you assholes?? And once again, ohmygod J F

Aquagirl said...

@Count: Glad you have your priorities straight & I think it’s wise not to marry a prostitute.

KittensRUs said...

No animal abuse, no child abuse, no history of violence toward women. Everything else depends on how recent. White collar stuff, who cares, once you get past a certain income level there are felons and guys who haven't been caught yet.

Aquagirl said...

@Freebird: Sorry to hear about your housing situation as well as your relationship, with, I guess ‘Charlie’?

Life can be scary. Unfortunately, when I was coming into my building the other night, a really fucked up
guy asked me to let him in (it definitely wasn’t alcohol or pot—it was something else.) I said I was sorry but I couldn’t because I didn’t know him. At that point, I had to choose between running & having him follow me, (it was late on Sunday because I had been out of town, so there was nobody was out & about) or trying to get into the inner door & slam it in time. Unfortunately, he pushed the door and then shoved me, and I now have a serious black eye. Nothing like this has ever happened to me, despite the fact that I moved to NY as a teenager. Once he got in I didn’t want to risk getting into an elevator with him, so I called my landlord. The same guy came back down with a set of keys, called me a fucking c***, etc., and my landlord heard the whole conversation. I filed a police report and offered to show them my phone & call my landlord as well & they wouldn’t accept it. (Thank you fucking Jussie Smollett.) They said they would only accept video evidence, and I don’t think that the cameras in our lobby even work.

Aquagirl said...

Needless to say, looking for a new apt. in NYC. Ever since I moved into this building, a lot of crazy/scary stuff has happened. (I’ve traveled to Third World countries alone & have never been afraid.) Please contact me if anyone knows of a potential apt. Thanks CDANers!

Count Jerkula said...

Aquagirl: wise man once said : cant make a housewife out of a whore.

Freebird said...

Wow, that’s so scary! I’m a Lyft driver and I was assaulted by a passenger (male) a couple months ago. I’m still uneasy. It makes you on edge for awhile. Hope you find a great (and safer) place to live!
And thanks. ❤️ Lyft made drastic cuts to our pay, 2 days before Thanksgiving. I had excellent credit & had never been late on any of my bills, for years. In one month, my credit has been ruined, I’ve been evicted, and from the looks of it this evening, I’ll be going to a homeless shelter. 😞 My cats will have to go in foster care (if someone is willing to take them) and I will have to walk away from my 3 bedroom house on the lake, full of my belongings. I don’t have enough money for an apartment, or movers. I will take what I can to a storage unit. I love how all of my friends say they’’ll always be here for me, but none of them could spare even a couple hours to help me pack. 🤷🏼‍♀️
Every road I turn down is a dead end. My life 2 months ago was wonderful. Now it’s the pits. My depression is sky high & I fight suicidal thoughts daily. It’s so insane how just choosing to work full-time at the wrong job could land me in such a mess. 😞

Scandi Sanskrit said...

I hope life gets better for you, Freebird. 💛

J F said...

I'm right there with you on the goat yoga whack jobs... I thought about it a while back, but went to Lululemon and they were completely out of yoga pants in my goats size...

Sarah said...

Since I don’t have a criminal record, I would hope my future SO won’t have any either. I don’t have an “all or nothing” opinion on this, but I definitely want to steer clear as much as possible

Count Jerkula said...

Lululemon mention made me think of a chick i was chatting with a while back. I totally could have been getting trolled/catfished, but this chick was talkin about her alkie brother creeping her out. Said she was doing laundry, and walking through the kitchen when she dropped her phone. Said her drunk brother took a step toward her, as she bent over, then said "no" and mumbled something to himself. I asked what she was wearing and she said leggings. I said "laundry day, so you didnt have panties on, huh?" No. I told her "Google 'Lululemon see thru' and look at the pix. Your brother probably got an eyeful of the goods and it took him a second to remember you were his sister." Girl freaked out.

Ice Angel said...

Great question. Before I met my husband I dated a guy I was madly in love with but he dumped me. I was devastated beyond believe. And even after 30 years, I always viewed him as "the one that got away" and often fantasize about what my life would be like had I married him. Don't get me wrong. Love my family, but just when things get tough sometimes, you let your mind harmlessly wander a bit.

So doing as I do, I googled him. I first found out that he was a very successful businessman, running his own company and lived in a gorgeous home. Also found out he had kids, even though he always told me he never wanted kids, which was a big reason he gave me for ending it, but whatever, and of course is married. So a tinge of jealousy went through me when I found that out.

Then I came across his name on a police blotter. DUI and speeding in his Porsche. It instantly brought back all of the memories of how much he drank. At the time we were young and it was fun and I drank a lot too. That's often what people do when they are young. But then it hit me that all this time, even with all of his financial success, I would have been married to a drunk who thought it was really cool to speed in his sportscar when he was hammered and could have killed someone. And I bet he hired a great attorney to get him off. The bubble popped and it was then I realized how grateful I was to have the imperfect but wonderful family I have.

Donna said...

Jesus Freebird, I am so sorry to hear about your depression, eviction, and cats. Any chance you live in the Puget Sound area? I can’t give you cash, but maybe could help you and or cats???

horsewithnonick said...

That's potentially a big plus in my book, depending on the king in question.

J F said...

Count.. we have any all woman's prison close by. They process released at 10:30 am... That bus stop is the perfect spot for a lil speed dating Russian Roulette.....

J F said...

Wunder what you'd get if you googled "Lululemon see thru goat"?

Maybe later if I get bored....

J F said...

I'm not so bothered by someone that may or may not have committed a crime (other than animal cruelty and unreturned library books).. I draw the line at those that have been "convicted" of a crime!

.... That tells me all I need to know:
1) They're too stupid to get away with it AND
2) They must be too poor to get a good attorney or pay bribes

If you're gonna be a criminal invest in some Tony Robbins courses and "Be the Best You can Be". I like my felons sexy and successful!!

Count Jerkula said...

Jf: just saw something the other day on youtube i think about a pimp who was penpalling female convicts, getting them to his place in Georgia when they got released and pimping them out. Said he was just going on the website, sifting through pics, convictions and release dates, and werking them via letters. Enterprising fellow.

Lulu Filona said...

All I can say is don't date a guy with a bullet wound in his ass that he won't talk about. Not a good sign.

J F said...

Nice, I love a story with a Happy Ending!

Unfortunately, that has been going on for years in hollywood. I heard Singer has been writing to boys in orphanages and juvenile detention facilities for years.

J F said...

I just saved $300 on my car insurance by switching to GEICO... I bet that gets your juices flowin!!

Netflix and Chill?

J F said...

Especially if he shows up with it on your 3rd date... That's just asking for trouble IMHO

Freebird said...

Thank you! ☺️💗

Freebird said...

Awww...you’re so sweet! Nope. Not anywhere near Puget Sound, but thank you so much! ❤️

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