Although I'm sure my biography would probably bring me an advance sufficient enough to get me a McDonald's kid's meal, it is funny to see how much book publishers think celebrities are worth when it comes to book advances. You always hear about the multi-million dollar advances and the amounts paid for baby pictures to the stars is always crazy.
So, it must come as quite a shock to Lil Kim and Foxy Brown that their lives are worthless in celebrity terms, at least according to book publishers.
Both Kim and Foxy were sued yesterday because Simon & Schuster had given them some money in advance for the to write their biographies. Kim was given $40,000 and Brown was given $75,000. That's it?
To me it seems kind of insulting. Although I'm sure I wouldn't know half the people they would spill about, you would think that their stories would be much more interesting than say what Madonna's brother had to say. I mean both of these women have been in jail multiple times. They have had some crazy ass relationships, and in the case of Foxy Brown appear to actually be crazy.
I would love to read about what the hell they had to do or who they had to do to get their records made. I don't care if I don't know who the hell they are talking about as long as it's good. If I were them and got that chump change I wouldn't bother writing the damn book either. To me its saying, hey if I was some white chick celebrity who gave birth to the 600th celebrity kid I would be worth $1M, but because I'm going to tell you about the four guys who made me blow them in the recording studio to get a good song then you just aren't going to pay. Personally I've seen enough baby photos. Let me hear about Kim and her take on the East Coast/West Coast rap wars and who the hell she thinks killed Tupac.
$40,000? That's like Foxy Brown's legal bills for a week.
At this point I think the whole world is tired of the same kind of gossip and I want to hear some really good juice. If Karrine Steffans can keep me interested with her book, then I know both of these would even be better. So, instead of suing the women, promise them even more money if they do come through and write the books and give me some damn dirt.