Monday, December 21, 2009

Tiger Woods Heads Out On His Yacht With The Guys


Lets see. It's Christmas week and you are Tiger Woods. You have spent the past few weeks explaining to your wife why you felt the need to have at least 15 mistresses during your marriage. Reports have said that he is doing everything he can to save his marriage while other reports say Elin is going to file for divorce.

I'm guessing that if you really want to save your marriage the last thing you really should be doing is getting a bunch of your buddies and heading out on your yacht for a week long cruise to the Bahamas. But, that is exactly what Tiger is doing. Over the weekend Tiger and some buddies and maybe a woman or two?? headed off on his yacht to what is expected to be a Bahamas vacation.

Way to work on that marriage in intense counseling.

43 comments:

Mango said...

What a douche.

Sporky said...

My guess: Elin's probably told him to stick the marriage up his ass, so I'm sure he's cruising around now (literally and figuratively), and you KNOW there will be women on that boat.

mikey said...

Why doesn't he go visit his mom in CA? He is her only child, her grandchildren will be in Sweden, and I believe I had heard she's not in good health.

janele said...

Mikey--

His dad on his deathbed didn't stop Tiger from banging one of his many mistresses when he heard the news. What makes you think that Tiger will not do the same to his mom when she's in ill health?

Sorry, Tiger supporters -- your idol is tarnished.

Pookie said...

this guy's an ass. but let's get real. a breather from each other may not be a bad thing. it's not like he's off for the coast of africa. it's the freaking bahamas. they're really close to florida. if i were elin i'd be all 'get the eff away from me'. at this point they both know the marriage can't be salvaged. he's just living up to his douchicity out in the open now, as opposed to behind her back.

califblondy said...

Wasn't there a picture of the main mistress grocery shopping not far from where the yacht is docked? Ya, cruising with the fellas my ass.

Have there been any pictures of Tiger since the "accident"?

linnea said...

Yeah, im sure Rachel Uchitel got some of her "best friends" together and headed out on the ocean with him.

No, Califblondy, I dont think so. And considering how the paps have been all over his place/boat, I dont understand how he managed that

BrownEyedGuy said...

Douche should not have married if he was not ready to be faithful....

Jayme said...

Father of the year, right there folks. Be with your children (or at least close by so that you can visit them during the holidays) or go on a weeklong party with your buddies.

empyrios said...

I'm with Sporky: Elin has probably told him she is divorcing him and there's no way to reconcile so he may as well eff off and do what he wants while she figures out how much she's gonna take him for, lol.

i hope she gets whatever she wants in the settlement.

Sexecution said...

Wow, further proving he doesn't care about his children even a little. What parent wouldn't want to spend part of Christmas with his own children? Whoever is giving him advice is failing his stupid ass, he doesn't have any sense but you would think for 100 million dollars someone would have said no it will make you look worse, if that's even possible.

All of those men must be bachelors because you know what's going to happen on that yacht, HOOKERS!

He's a POS plain and simple.

whole_lotto _luv said...

Maybe he went out to enjoy the yacht one last time before he has to liquidate his assets.

Little Red Leo said...

hahah @ whole_lotto_luv.

I was thinking the same thing: what if he's just going for one last big party before she takes all his money?

God I hope she takes his ass to the cleaners.

sunnyside1213 said...

I am shocked. Just shocked. I was going to vote for him for Father of the Year. *sacrcasm*

I hope you are right whole_lotto_luv. I couldn't happen to a bigger douch.

Anonymous said...

Did you hear that Tiger is changing his name to try to distance himself from the scandal? Hence forth, he will be called "Cheetah". hee hee hee.

figgy said...

Everything @Pookie said. "living up to his douchicity," hahaha!

Yep, Elin prolly said "get the HELL away from me" and might even be insisting that the kids be with her and only her over Christmas. And I'd agree with her 100%. In which case, makes sense for him to go on a cruise.

Plus, looks like there's room for a helicopter full o' hos to land.

DJ said...

i can hear the helicopter blades churning....off goes the paparazzi

lyz said...

When does the helicopter full of strippers land?

Karmen said...

It's one thing if he doesn't try to repair his marriage, since it's already down the drain and he never bothered to honor it before. I just don't get why he's not trying to salvage his image. Going on a boat with the guys and not spending time with your kids makes you look like an ass.

TinselSass said...

Does he not realize that he just gave a few dozen paparazzi a free trip to the Bahamas for the holidays?!

Since his tree collision Tiger hasn't been seen. He's probably had time to heal and get new teeth (if necessary) but should have been advised to stay home or spend time with his Mom. Oh, that would have required his advisers to actually give good advice. What I'll remember about this time in pop culture - even after dozens of other scandals break - will always be how poorly the "PR crisis" was managed and how an image carefully crafted over more than a dozen years melted down in less than three weeks. That should be a cautionary tale to Tom C (beyond his couch jumping you know another crisis will come), Will and Jada and ??? Does anyone want to dish 2010 meltdowns in the making?

penelope said...

My first thought, DJ.

I hope no one gets killed trying to get that million dollar photo of Tiger with one of his bevy of babes.

Maybe his security guys have some rocket launchers on board. Should be an interesting XMas!

Harriet Hellfire said...

Now I can get that "I'm on a BOAT" song out of my head.

Isabel said...

I'm not too bothered by this. Elin probably told him to go fuck himself (or one of his many whores) and she's probably keeping the kids close by. Weren't reports saying that she was going to spend the holidays in Sweden? Tiger will be paying for these kids, but I get the feeling they'll be calling someone else dad soon enough.

not on my dollar said...

I'm ready to hand Elin another golf club, and I'm true believer of domestic violence advocacy.

I've NEVER admired or liked Tiger and can't wait for the day his azz falls hard and stays down!

Sporky said...

He will do it on a boat
He will do it with a goat
His name is Tiger, Sam I Am
And his marriage was a big-ass sham

(Sorry, couldn't resist!)

sunnyside1213 said...

@ Sporky. Too funny.

mikey said...

Janele - What was I thinking?! Must be the eggnog going to my head.

RJ said...

I wonder if he's even on the boat. Seems like a good decoy to me. My guess is that he'll take off to Dubai (may have spelled that wrong) soon if he isn't already there. They LOVE him there. He's friends with the crown prince, and even though their economy isn't what it once was, there are still tons of the super-rich there who would be fine with pal-ing around with Tiger. Keep in mind, this is a culture where women are, at best, second class citizens and men have multiple wives. He can play golf on the prince's private courses all winter and whore around to his heart's content and never have to see a tabloid cover or hear a late-night host's jokes.

As far as his kids go, do any of us think he has EVER spent much time with them? Between the girlfriends and tournaments, I doubt they've ever spent more than two or three days at a time with him. They probably won't even notice that anything is different.

As far as his mother goes, apples don't fall far from their trees. Someone had to teach him how to treat women. I'm sure she's used to being treated like crap by the Woods men.

nancer said...

i imagine the trip was agreed upon. nobody knows what's going on between them and this is just another assumption being made.
i'm not reading these items about him after this because whatever's going on, it's a private matter and i think enough's already been said.

ECFan said...

Tiger didn't exactly have a choice about spending X-mas with his wife and kids. At the rate women keep popping out of the woodwork to brag that they were screwing him Tiger will be lucky if Elin lets him come to the kids' high school graduations. Somehow I think seeingthem on Christmas 2009 is NOT an option. I also understand that his mother is beyond pissed off at him. If anyone's responsible for the cuts and bruises that kept him from showing his face to the police - my money is on his mother Tida, not Elin. He always did say she was much stricter with him than his father was.

Having said that - yeah, Tiger could have found a better way to spend the week than hanging out with the guys who covered for him for 7+ years. He should probably have shown up an Orlando soup kitchen or something like that. Tiger's a brilliant golfer, but he ain't 1/100th the man he ought to be.

JoElla said...

oohh Momma opening up a can of whoop ass! I like that theory very much =)

mngddess said...

I am curious as to why the man needed FIFTEEN mistresses. Seriously. Why bother getting married, then? Idiot.

ardleigh said...

@ Sporky -- loved the Suess.

From there to here
from here to there
Tiger's whores
Pop up everywhere.

I have heard their prenup doesn't allow for big money for her. Does anyone else know?

ChasingHeaven said...

Every one of those guys better be single or there will be a lot of women swingin' golf clubs when they return. I don't know how else any guy could hang out with him otherwise. No woman in their right mind would let their man set sail with Tiger now.

Vanessa said...

His not going to lose a lot of money...he has a prenup which is legally binding unless he decides to giver elin more money.

Just b/c he doesn't spend time w/ his kids on christmas day...doesn't make him a bad father.....really people...get real.

Vanessa said...

Blogger not on my dollar said...

I'm ready to hand Elin another golf club, and I'm true believer of domestic violence advocacy.
---------------

if you are a true believer in domestic violence advocacy why would you even suggest or support abuse of an individual just b/c they are unfaithful...really .....since when did it b/c okay to beat your lover just b/c he or she cheated.
Why is it acceptable for a women to be abusive to a men....abuse is wrong when a man or woman try to do it to another person.
hypocrites.

Kim said...

Vanessa, I agree with you.

Tiger's douchiness on this particular detail is that he is leaving his children ( who he may not give a crap about, who knows.) alone with someone who hits. I hope to hell there's a nanny around those poor babies.

How I decided if I'm being fair is to switch the people in stories like this around and see if the reaction would be the same.
Here goes:
So, Elin sleeps with 15 men while Tiger's on tour. He finds out. They argue, she tries to leave the home. He comes at her with a golf club damages the car and injures her and she runs the car into a tree or whatever it was Tiger ran into. Then, she publically takes the blame for the incident and even takes the traffic citation. We'd be calling him a violent asshole (and rightly so), her a textbook brainwashed abused wife and saying no wonder the poor thing had affairs, she's looking for love and to feel safe because you know this wasn't the first act of violence..and Tiger's ass would be UNDER the jail.

I don't understand why it's okay for her.

PJ Nelson said...

I'm with Kim: Violence is just wrong - doesn't matter who does it.
And nancer: I've heard enough.

Meg C.H. said...

Yeah, I was about to jump on the "what a douchebag" bandwagon but maybe Elin told him to go. I could see myself telling him he could go F himself for the holidays especially if I was mad and if I thought being away from his children would actually bother him. Any chance to get a dig in...

c17 said...

Ent, sometimes us women need our "space" to figure things out. I'm guessing he's giving Elin hers...and I HOPE he's not stupid to get caught with any women while they're on a "break". If he's serious about the "working things out" sentiment.

canadachick said...

i wonder where Rachel Uchitel is.....my guess is we'll be seeing bikini pics of her sunning on the yacht. Ho ain't ready to go just yet

sunnyside1213 said...

@ ardleigh, is that from the Scarlet Pimpernel? Love that story.

Amazing Quotes said...

very interesting post
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