Monday, April 05, 2010

Tiger Woods To Have More Guards Than The President


This weekend at The Masters, Tiger Woods will have almost 100 security guards just for himself. The cost? Almost half a million bucks. Yep, for one golfer. No death threats or anything like that. The guards are just there to make sure no one gets close to Tiger. Oh, and to make sure cameras stay away in case Tiger finds someone to spend a little one on one time with if you know what I mean. I mean Elin didn't make the trip and you know Tiger hasn't been out on the road in awhile. You don't think he is running scenarios in his head right now about how he can spend some time with a woman or Derek Jeter's doppelganger. Please.

Can you imagine having 100 security guards just there for you? Because you cheated on your wife. Of course Tiger isn't footing the bill. The Masters is. They are happy to shell out all that money for security for the publicity of having Tiger play. I guess every event better get used to it. Why does he get 100 security guards and everyone else gets zero? What if everyone wants 100? Are they saying Tiger is more important than anyone else? I think they are.

17 comments:

mikey said...

Two things to consider. TV viewing of golf is down since Tiger has been away, and I'm willing to be bet more people than ever will tune in to the Master's since this is the big return of Tiger. They'll make more than enough money to cover his small army of security.

I'll be glad when he is old news.

AEB said...

That photo of Tiger and his caddy made me actually laugh out loud.

Cheryl said...

Elin probably demanded it to keep the hoes off his jock.

Shmooey said...

Who the hell is making golf so profitable that tournament organisers can afford this? It looks like the most boring sport ever.

Having said that, if I did like golf, and was into watching golf, playing golf, buying golf shit, I wouldn't give a damn about if Tiger is playing or not.
Just like, even though I'm into tennis, I don't about Roger Federer - incidentally, Tiger's BFF - because just being number one athlete doesn't make you necessarily the most exciting, compelling player to watch.

The Masters org. is banking on him still being a huge draw. But now people have seen the man behind the facade, maybe he won't have the same appeal.

MISCH said...

CHERYL.........YOU TOOK THE WORDS OUT OF MY MOUTH...IT'S A HO BARRICADE

Lady J said...

Of course they shelled out that money for Tiger-look how much he has made for them since he started. Before him no one gave a DAMN about the sport, most people still don't, but he at least made people interested...at least until the truth about his indiscretions came out.

shakey said...

I think someone thinks a little too highly of himself.

At least with an extra 100 people there it might look like a crowd that gives a shit.

Linnea said...

at least one of the guards MUST know an attractive sister/old childhood friend who is looking for some extra work? i would make sure to smuggle them in for sure...

Anonymous said...

He could always say he needs to go to the toilet and a ho is waiting for him there LOLOLOL. Hey you never know....

sunnyside1213 said...

Raise your hands now. Who thinks he has already cheated?

Pookie said...

i'd love to take a look at the masters' event budget...that's insane.

mooshki said...

LMAO!! I read that as "he can spend some time with a woman or ON Derek Jeter's doppelganger." I was wondering if "doppelganger" was a new euphemism I hadn't yet heard! It does seem oddly appropriate...

"Are they saying Tiger is more important than anyone else?"

Given that 250 people total in the entire country watched golf before Tiger came along (Trufact - if I said it on the internet it must be true!) he's worth whatever it takes. It's an easy bet he makes them more money than every single other golf player combined.

Paisley said...

I don't think the Masters tournament has any idea what's going to happen when Tiger appears on the course. Golfers are just a few feet away from spectators. Some are mobile and follow certain golfers over the whole course and some stay put in an area like the putting greens. There may be hecklers. There may be people who want to get Tiger banners on TV. Maybe nothing will happen. They just need to be prepared. And what happens or doesn't happen at the Masters will give other tournaments an idea of what to expect in the immediate future.

B626 said...

boring

Unknown said...

Guards? To keep him from seeking women or from women seeking him? My bet is the former.

MotherOfTwo said...
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MotherOfTwo said...
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