Friday, September 05, 2008

Ted C Blind Item #2

Isn't it interesting Lloyd Boy-Toyed is undertaking his latest media campaign to fight off rumors about everything under the tabloid sun—every topic save the one he wants to get out: that he sometimes likes young dudes in bed. Not Michael Jackson-style, mind you, but he sometimes likes 'em young. And to keep quiet. And you know what that means, doncha girlfriends? Occasionally Mr. Boy-Toyed's gotta give 'em the green. What a cold, hard, cashed-out town this can be, huh?

Let's see, Lloyd's busy mouthing off about his nasty battles with most everybody in the Biz, not to mention his more cherished (and known) companions and relatives. He appears to be a total crank-a-thon, really, but don't believe it for a sec. Oh, some of it's real, that's fer sure, but it's mostly for show, I assure you.

I have firsthand knowledge of Lloyd's more cunning agendas—not to mention the ones he prefers to get underway under the covers. Don't ask me how. I can't tell! I'm a married man now! I would never embark on something as nasty as tattling 'tween the sheets when I've got a superhoney at home. Quite the opposite of how Lloyd goes about things, trust.

Really, though, as sloppy as Lloyd's getting in the attempting-to-score department, he's gonna be out long before our beloved Toothy Tile, I assure you. Oh, and Lloyd-baby, I don't care, really. But, your blind-as-merde fans sure will. I say screw it, already! (Like you have so many guys.)

55 comments:

Moosefan said...

Puffy, or P Diddy or what ever he wants to be called right now. He rants about the craziest stuff out there...

unicorn jones said...

I thought lindsey lohan's dad at first . . . but at the end it says "fans" so scratch that


I'm going with jon voight


--uj

not a famous adrian said...

Tom Cruise.

not a famous adrian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sydney said...

I was totally thinking Michael Lohan until the mention of 'fans,' unless, of course, religious nuts count as fans.

wood1107 said...

Tom Cruise fans are blind-as-merde, n'est pas?

My head and heart and soul SOOO want this to be Tom Cruise.

ms snarky said...

if we go back to the music biz, when I think about guys who complain about everything, I think Fiddy Cent. baby mamma trouble, competition trouble, etc, etc.

of course, there's always Puff Diddy and his recent trauma having to fly commercial. sob.

Ed said...

I was gonna say Toby or Jake but isnt Jake toothy. Someone in his circle of friends, it sounded to me like Lloyd was part of toothys friends.

Lisa said...

How about Kanye? He's always got a gripe with someone and rumors abound about his sexuality...

ms snarky said...

ed - but those guys are pretty quiet, no recent publicity that they're ranting about anything.

the blind says "busy mouthing off about his nasty battles with most everybody in the Biz, not to mention his more cherished (and known) companions and relatives. He appears to be a total crank-a-thon"

ms snarky said...

lisa - excellent guess. that blog of his is crazy with the crankiness. and so many rappers have the rumors. Puff Diddy, Kanye, Fiddy, Dre - just look at anything Wendy Williams says, she's all about outing them.

A Pimp Named DaveR said...

I like the guesses so far. Another one for the grist mill: Alec Baldwin?

ms snarky said...

daver - excellent guess. Alec just did that interview with a big mag, complaining about Kim. and he's on the Dem campaign trail.

ms snarky said...

I would also love this to be Tommy. sigh. we can't always get what we want. please please please.

Cheryl said...

I thought of Kanye too.

Diddydiddydumdiddydoo is also on the down-low, but he is on the way out and I doubt he has many fans these days.

Ed said...

Snarky, you're right I just went bacl an d reread it.

What about Christian Bale? He was busy fighting off the charges his mom and sister made about him...and he has been more vocal due to The Dark Knight than he normally is.

CynCamden said...

The constant use of Lloyd (LL), the word 'green' and the term 'superhoney' lead me to believe it's superman related? Either Brandon Routh or *gulp* Tom Welling?

Mika said...

Edward Norton.

CynCamden said...

Ms. Snarky, are you thinking what I'm thinking? LOL

jax said...

Diddy...non stop bitching and a lot of GAY rumours surrounding him for years right?

Jamie's Girl said...

Spacey is already out pretty much. I don't think it is Baldwin.

sheetrock said...

Jim Carrey. He played Lloyd Christmas in Dumb and Dumber.

Marisa said...

How about Mike Myers?

Allison said...

John Cusack?

Lloyd Dobler is the most famous Lloyd I know....

cherised and known companions/relatives?
Jeremey Piven? His sister Joan? He 'dated' Neve Campbell...

I love Lloyd Dobler. John Cusack? Not too much. He's been pissing me off lately.

Allison said...

thanks google!
i'm even more convinced that it's Cusack now...

cherished (and known) companions and relatives?

http://www.whosdatedwho.com/celebrities/people/dating/john-cusack.htm

dvz said...

Shia LaBeouf.... Ted using the French word for shit twigged me.

Ace Tomato said...

Hey, who has Cusack dated anyway?

Janele said...

I was actually thinking Lance Armstrong with the French reference and "strong" in his name compared to the mention of superhoney, as well as the name starting with L. He's been all over the place lately talking about his past relationships.

Starburst said...

Please not Edward Norton, I love him so much.

Tom Cruise. Hes dated some high profile people, complains endlessly, and has some really blind fans.

hesaweiner said...

John Mayer

Jaiden said...

I like the Cusack guess. I'll say either him or Baldwin. They're both cranky.

ECFan said...

If Ted's claiming personal knowledge that the person is in the closet, then it's George Clooney. Otherwise I'm at a loss as to why he always bends over backwards to kiss Clooney's butt. And we all know Clooney rarely "dates" anything but high class (now that's a misnomer) hookers.

amster said...

As usual after reading one of Ted's BI's I have a splitting headache. But I really, really want it to be Tom Cruise so that is what I am saying.........I think.

pricolatino said...

Christian Bale

DNfromMN said...

I think that Teddy knows better than to out Tom Cruise even in a blind.

I can't believe no one posted the Ain'ts yet:

It ain't: Matthew Perry, David Duchovny, Kanye West.

So rants like Kanye, sex addict like Duchovny, most likely TV actor (Duchovny/Perry).

Alec Baldwin seems most likely of our guesses.

p m said...

This blind is written with even more cattiness than normal, like Ted C has a personal vendetta against the guy. Did anyone else get that vibe?

Kelli said...

It really does scream Cruise..

ECFan said...

PM -

Yes, I agree that Ted sounds like he's got a personal history with the guy. Actually, in his obtuse way, Ted makes that pretty clear when he says, "I have firsthand knowledge..."

redgurl72 said...

So Ted has had firsthand knowledge in the past?
I was thinking Mayer at first but it sounds like someone around Ted's age who's been on the scene a while.
Alec Baldwin has sposedly used beards in the past (Jen Love Hewitt and Kristin Davis) but I that was to distract from the fact that he was an alcoholic wife beater rather than gay. He fits though.

BlahFrickinBlah said...

Diddy or Cruise. Both of them ramble and bitch nonstop.

watcher said...

“Lloyd's busy mouthing off about his nasty battles with most everybody in the Biz, not to mention his more cherished (and known) companions and relatives”

This clue doesn’t fit George Clooney.
• he is well liked in the film industry
• when he made a negative comment about Charlton Heston’s alzheimers, Clooney agreed later that it wasn’t classy of him to say that
• he has said he doesn’t talk publicly about his mother because she doesn’t want him to
• he gets along with his parents - worked with his father, a former newsman, on Darfur stuff; also George helped his father raise money for a political campaign

Another thing - I’ve read that Clooney is rumored to be bi. The blind seems to be worded as though it is the attraction for guys (who happen to be young) that LBT doesn’t want to be known.

Now I could see that a guy who is bi still might not want people to know he prefers men who are much younger than him.

This doesn’t seem to fit Clooney either: “your blind-as-merde fans”

Shouldn’t it be an Italian word if the blind is about Clooney (re his summer home in Italy)? Clooney isn’t adored in France, not like Jerry Lewis, although in 2007 the French government gave Clooney the "Chevalier des Arts et Lettres" award for contribution to cinema.

On the other hand, this clue could fit Clooney:
“Occasionally Mr. Boy-Toyed's gotta give 'em the green. What a cold, hard, cashed-out town this can be, huh?”

Clooney is rumored to give ex-girlfriends cash and/or houses. He was open about it with respect to Celine Balitran, who uprooted herself and moved from France to be with him. She did give an interview to a French magazine a long time ago and discussed George a bit, but it wasn’t anything earth shattering.

Judi said...

Who among the guesses is Ted most likely to have slept with? Or maybe someone we haven't thought of yet.
Can't see him doing Cruise - EVER. Can't see anyone doing Cruise really. Can't see him doing Kanye or Diddy either. Maybe it is Clooney.

ally said...

So apparantly merde can also be used as a dancing term...Travolta, Swayze?
Or to use the French work Merde as a clue, Olivier Martinez
At first reading I thought he wrote Madre, and so I thought it was Skeletor bc of JLo's restaurant...

too said...

I have no idea who it is, but it sounds like someone older - 'Lloyd Boy-toyed' implies he's going out with guys way younger, but not underage (ala M Jackson) so I'm thinking he's at least mid-30s.

Also, Ted says he's fighting off lots of rumours in the media right now and tends to rant a lot anyway.

None of the guesses seem to really fit except Puffy/Diddy.

linnea said...

oh god, when i first read it I was CONVINCED that it was al johnson and I thought "this isnt even a blind item, is it?" but then I came to the comments and I feel confused...

I know he is not real famous, nor has "fans", but I thin k Ted is referring to those rants he has on his web page - the videos where he points out over and over again that he is not gay. He talks about his fights with people in the biz, he talks about how he doesnt want to be associated with Star anymore....


I guess I was way off. But I thought I would share my thoughts at least.

mmartel said...

its john meyer!!!!

mmartel said...

its john meyer!!!!

palin for pres said...

john meyer ...merde...famous companion is jen anniston

brian said...

Has to be clooney. Known to pay for young italian men and show them all a great time (confirmed by my mole Italy - and he's more and more public about it.

He was also doing all the wacky marriage stuff with brad pitt at recent press conference for last film. And all those quesitons about him not being married yet are getting embarassing......

sandman said...

i dunno, i can def see clooney as gay, but how many secrets must be kept to keep this under wraps all these years, guess i'm naive, but don't get it but do understand how bloggers have to earn advertising.

pinkpresent said...

okay - am i the only one who picked up on "..fighting rumors about everything under the tabloid sun..." who has a beef and/or lawsuit with the u.k. celbrity magazine the sun? i'm not buying clooney or alec baldwin...i think ted has had sex or something...with this guy. alec baldwin wouldn't mess with a big mouth, would he? surely neither would clooney..no way on mayer, either. not buying kanye or diddy.. cruise? gay? possibly..this blind..no.

Lissa said...

I like John Mayer...although I don't know how that would fit with the Blind-as-merde fans line. That has to be a clue...It definitely sounds like Ted has slept with this person.

palealebrew10 said...

I've read this blind about 5 times now. And I am 99.98% convinced this is Mayer, especially with the ain'ts: Matthew Perry, David Duchoveney, Kanye West.

The "and you know what that means, doncha, girlfriends?" *cough*Jen Aniston*cough*

And remember his alleged makeout session with Perez? I'm buying it.

Sexecution said...

Lydia Hearst looks like her mother when she was abducted by the SLA and did the bank robbery, look at the old photos of her mother and it's uncanny. Not the anorexia, but they look so much alike, I wonder why Patty Hearst raised such a waste of space for a daughter?

Bank robber heiress. I wonder if Lydia will marry a security guard too?

bookjacket said...

It's Alec Baldwin. See today's column--

Dear Ted:
Does Lloyd Boy-Toyed have good-looking famous siblings?
—Maria

Dear Sexy Sibs:
That would be an affirmative.

Years ago, Ted used to go on and on about his crush on Alec. Now he is pretty nasty about him despite their similar political views. Something happened.