Friday, August 28, 2009

Ted C Blind Item

You all didn't really think the hetero-Vice streak would continue, did you? Ted may be gone, but unfortunately, the closeting of some of Hollywood's most famous isn't going anywhere. Get ready to meet the guy who will have Toothy Tile breathing easy for a while.

Introducing Jackie Bouffant—a name you'd better get used to hearing. He's one of the most sought-after actors in the world right now. The undeniably gorgeous and multitalented young dude has taken the entertainment Biz by storm. His level of fame has been steadily rising over the past couple of years, although Jack hasn't really had to prove himself talent-wise just yet.

But with that face, hair and body, no one cares. This town is way too superficial!

So while Jackie is looking pretty in all the glossy mags with a beard constantly at his side (Crescent Kumquat or No-Beave Steve Jackie Bouffant most definitely is not), hardly anyone out there knows J.B.'s past life and love...

With another male actor, wouldn't you know?

At the time they started dating, they were both probably equally famous, but no one talks about Jackie's ex that much anymore. An equally gorgeous and recognizable face, he just never really amounted to much career-wise. Let's call him Frank Dangerfield.

Jackie and Frank were very much boyfriend-boyfriend, and they didn't do a very good job of hiding it. They went to a few gay functions together, a little hand-holding here and there à la Toothy and Gray Goose, and Industry folks knew the two boys weren't just going through an experimental phase. Unlike Nevis Divine, these two fellas are gay, gay and more gay.

But no one cared much because everyone (their managers and publicists included) thought these kids would just be F-list actors. Uh, not the case for Jackie. He became an overnight superstar.

So you know how it goes: Jackie's whole team of people tell him that if he comes out his heartthrob status will be shot and his red-hot career will go buh-bye. No teenage girl (Bouffant's prime fan base) will fantasize about growing up and marrying a gay guy. So Jackie dumps Frank and starts faux-mancing with some other babes around town.

Such a shame. And you all wonder where true love is in Hollywood? It's behind closed closet doors.

And It Ain't: Channing Tatum, Kellan Lutz, Nick Jonas

65 comments:

bflogurl said...

Rob P??

Lisa (original) said...

Rob Pattinson, sadly.

Kate said...

Robert Pattinson for the win.

Lisa (original) said...

Ooooh, or the other one, the one with the big teeth, Gah! what's his name?!....TAYLOR LAUTNER!

Kathryn said...

chris pine!

kimi said...

Where did Ted go? What about Zac or does everyone know he is gay?

Jingle Belle said...

In my opinion it's Robert P. That Taylor Lautner isn't very well known in comparison.

Funny Girl said...

I think this has to be R Patz

Sean said...

Well, hopefully someone took Ted out behind the barn to put him out of out misery.

And damn, this is Zac. Gotta be.

SG said...

lol i thought it was channing until i saw it wasn't at the bottom. the whole time i'm like it's channing tatum with the dancing and good looks.

I'd go for Taylor Lautner because they mentioned that hair, face, and body and Rob P has terrible hair although recognizable...

Jonathan Chang said...

Jonathan Bennett and Matt Dallas...

or Zac

RocketQueen said...

Doesn't make sense to be Rob - Ted's always going on about how real he and Kristin are.

And anyway, isn't Rob suspected to be Nevis Divine?

d said...

This sounds like Zac Effron - but does anybody really think he's not gay?

sunnyside1213 said...

Ted said Rob Pattinson already has a BV and no one ever gets two BV names. He also said Zac E was seconds from being a BV.

Taylor Lautner, Ed Westwick, Zac E, Chase C, and Shia L are some of the guesses. I thought Bradley Cooper almost immediately, but he may be too old for this one.

Is anyone in Hollyweird straight?

Tara said...

What about Taylor Kitsch from Friday Night Lights? I had a friend who said TK was gay and they were friends....maybe just wishful thinking on his part?

The And It Ain't's are Tv AND Movies, which he has done and his career has really started to take off this past year, only looking to get better.

emailchallenged said...

Zac effron

L said...

I would have said Robert Pattinson, and the gay actor BF might be Tom Felton (Draco) in the Harry Potter movie they did together.

procrastination101 said...

i say zac efron because he mentions j.b. having a beard, being multitalented, and rising fame without really proving his talent. robert pattinson is a good guess, but his fame is newer, and he hasn't done any roles to show he's multitalented. he's also not really known for his svelte physique like zefron. lol!

if it is zefron, i'm wondering now if coming out of the closest might actually be the best thing for his career. a lot of people say it's his tween fan base that's holding him back from being taken more seriously, so i'm guessing if he can get rid of them, he'll finally get the respect he wants. besides does coming out really hurt someones career? i'm young though, so anyone older, feel free to correct me on that!

Nina said...

I wouldn't call Zac Efron one of the most sought after actors in the world. That's more Ewan McGregor or Hugh Jackman.

Lisa (original) said...

I think Rob P's multi-talented because he can compose and play piano.

Little Miss Smoke and Mirrors said...

As much as I would love it to be Rob, I don't think it is based on how Ted goes on and on and on and on and on and on about "Robsten." Christ, I wish he would STFU about them already.

Either Zac or Chris Pine work for me.

merrick said...

This wasnt posted by Ted, but by Taryn Rider? .. maybe Ted is on vacation. I think we have to figure out who the bf was that was dumped. They give the bf the name Dangerfield, maybe he's "getting no respect." Think of two guys often seen together in the past, who are no longer photo'd together. Chace and Ed?

Katie said...

shia

Katie said...

robert pattinson just became huge this past year. The BI states "His level of fame has been steadily rising over the past couple of years".
Also, Ted talks every single day about how "robsten" is totally a couple and kristen and rob are in love. this is not rob

Christopher said...

Zac FTW.

mazemerizing said...

Don't think it's Rob. I reread that horrible blind and it talks about Jackie having "a beard constantly at his side," which Rob does not, but Zac definitely does. Or did. And I agree with procrastination101 that Zac might get more respect and older fans if he nipped that tween fan base in the bud, so to speak. I'm old(er) and I think that coming out ain't that big a deal anymore. But that's just me.

cdanluva said...

I like the Shia guess. Also what about Hayden Christianson? Or is he not famous enough. . .

Diana said...

Zac is not 'fauxmancing' with 'other babeS' - he has only really been seen with VH. It sounds to me like someone who has a string of different relationships.

This is someone that palled around a lot with the other guy in the beginning. I don't think I ever heard about ZE hanging out with any other specific guys--

kimi said...

Coming out is still a big deal to celebrities . It is just not as believable seeing a hot guy in a movie pursuing a lady if you know in real life he only likes dudes. Give me an example if I am wrong. ie , Greys anatomy, I would tune in now and again and would forget he was straight on the show. JMO

Sean said...

Hey kimi....I guess all the straight men and women who played gay weren't very convincing.
Tom Hanks and Antonio B
Jake and Heath
Billy Crystal
Whoopi
Glenn Close
Cher
Charlize Theron
Christina Ricci
Eric McCormack
Bruce Davidson
Billy Cambell
Steven Weber and many many more.

thepunk said...

Robert Pattinson and Tom Sturridge?

lulu said...

Bradley Cooper & Victor Garber

M said...

I don't know, I would think that if you were truly a great actor, it wouldn't matter if you were gay or straight in regards to the role you were currently playing. Like seeing someone really visually well known like Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise in a movie. If the script is well written and the acting done right, you would think you would get absorbed into the story and not be thinking, "Hey, it's Brad Pitt trying to be [fill in the blank]!" while watching it. Also, speaking of Tom Cruise, he's always been rumored to be gay so I don't know what's worse: being known to be gay and trying to portray a straight character on the screen that's buyable and believable to the paying audience, or being heavily rumored to be gay in real life and trying to play the usual straight role on the big screen (whether you are or aren't gay in real life). I think having the ambiguity of "is he or isn't he?" is more distracting when watching a movie than actually knowing one way or another. Rupert Everett had some success early on I thought with playing both sides. So has Jodi Foster.

That all wordily said...I thought that this might be Zac with all his HS Musical crap, though he doesn't fit the "other babes around town" part necessarily...

Blondie said...

hugh jackman?? but the teenage fan base doesn't fit perfectly there. i think it may be Shia

TinselSass said...

Back to... "Where's Ted?" Is he on vacay or has he really gone away?

Mrs.M5 said...

i really am feeling the Zac Effron guess. i don't think Robert Pattison is as universaly pretty...some girls think he is hot, others (like me) think he looks like he got hit by a truck in the face area. but you can't deny that Zac is a pretty boy, and he has a pretty bangin' bod

The Professionals said...

Jon Hamm

TinselSass said...

And who are Crescent Kumquat and No-Beave Steve?

Keane said...

It's Orlando Bloom. He is "pretty", has had a string of beards (Kate Bosworth, Miranda Kerr and uber-beard Jennifer Aniston) and he's "one of the most sought after actors in the world right now". That's my guess anyway.

vamp said...
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vamp said...
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vamp said...

no way is it Rob...agree he mentions Robsten constantly...i read this as the guy dumped his BF after becoming an overnight sensation and has risen ever since...Chace Crawford is a good guess...Gossip Girl has been on a few years and he dated Carrie Underwood and was seen kissing Ashley Green, thus the twilight stars in "and it ain't"...Channing is in Eclipse...

TortoiseGeek said...

"Ted may be gone" comment is referring to Ted Kennedy. Now, why that is being mentioned in this blind item is beyond me.

brendalove@gmail.com said...

Ted C is on vacation, that's all.

Rob Pattison is Nevis Devine. I'm guessing Chace Crawford for this blind....tho it could very well be Zac Efron also.

Lisa (not original) said...

According to IMDB, Pattinson is quite the musician. BF - Stanislav Ianevski? He's up 50% in popularity this week. I'd say he's the most sought-after teen idol at the moment. Finally, his hair is his trademark (Bouffant). Not all that blind. Sorry, Twitards... you're vampire is not interested.

farmgirl said...

I think this is definitely Zac Efron. It says multi-talented which has to include more than just acting. So who is his ex? Recognizable face?

Rachel said...

Sounds a lot like Zac Efron but he's only gone out with one girl not multiple 'babes'. Something isn't quite right with that guess.

Share said...

Totally Efron. I thought of him as soon as Bouffant came up. That was his hair style from the movie Hairspray. And there has been a lot of talk about his body - he's been showing it off quite a bit lately.

This isn't Rob guys - get over it. Rob just came into his fame with Twilight - he was unknown other than a small part in Harry Potter. So his fame has only been there for a short time. And it appeared quite suddenly.

Second - as another person said, Rob already has a blind vice name. And this came from the horse's mouth - Ted himself. No actor has two BV names.

Third - Rob is only known for two of the three physical aspects. Face and hair, his body was famously criticized because he didn't have the rock hard abs that Edward was supposed to have.

Besides - if this were Rob - don't you think that Twilight would have been mentioned SOMEWHERE in the blind? All the blinds about the cast members of Twilight have mentioned the franchise somewhere in the blind.

So all you Rob haters need to find another guy for this blind. ;). However I wouldn't be surprised that he was the center of another gay blind - but not this one.

jfranco said...

its Bradley Cooper. he dated his co-star from Alias

Preciousredtx said...

Hey Kimi,
Personally, I think Neil Patrick Harris does really good playing a straight guy on HIMYM....Just sayin

I thought the Ted Names had the same syllables as the actors names??

maybe Daniel Radcliffe? or Shia

First time I have guessed here...

Jaiden_S said...

Based on the ages of the "and it ain'ts," this one is too young to be Bradley Cooper. I think Zefron is a good guess, if he's not already a blind vice.

ardleigh said...

Who cares who it is! I read that Ted blind and didn't need a Ted-to-English dictionary or get a headache afterward. Awesome!

Lioness70 said...

Zefron for the win.

Not having to prove his talent - the HSM horrorfests.

Beard constantly at his side - check.

No more teen girls swooning (but haven't they migrated to the Jonases or RPatz by now?) - check.

Yet another example of the Hollywood machine making someone into something they're not. Is the trade-off really worth it?

Ed said...

I really like the Chris Pine guess. HIs fame has been on a steady climb, had a beard in that Danity Kane for a minute, Star Trek doesnt take much in the way of talent, nor did his movie with Lindsay Lohan Just my Luck

Tea Lady said...

How about Thomas Dekker for the in-demand fellow? Dunno who the bf would be....

mabel said...

Ted ruled out RPatz for ND.

*Miss_P* said...

Chase Crawford & Ed Westwick

B626 said...

Bradley Cooper and the fake Renee and Jen triangle...
Zac Efron DID prove himself in '17 again'

Nosey Parker said...

But no one cared much because everyone (their managers and publicists included) thought these kids would just be F-list actors. Uh, not the case for Jackie. He became an overnight superstar.

"These kids" stands out to me.

I guess Zac Efron and Corbin Bleu for the bf he left behind.

lanac said...

krescent kumsquat or whatever is supposed to be taylor and this guy is kellan lutz.

Marie said...

It says at the bottom it isn't Kellan Lutz.

I also don't think it's Efron - it says everyone expected him to stay F but Disney doesn't pick kids like that to be prettied up, packaged and sold.

Ed said...

What about Ryan Renyolds?

shakey said...

Can't be Ryan Reynolds. He's married and I'm trying to think of what makes him "multi" talented.

Zac "hasn't really had to prove himself talent-wise just yet". Just yet. In 17 Again he played a teenager with lots of school scenes. Not a giant leap. I imagine with this Charlie St. Cloud movie he will have to prove himself because it seems like it could be a stepping stone to more mature films.

The only thing that throws me is the fauxmancing other babes part.

Michelle said...

Funny, I immediately assumed it was Bradley Cooper. Then I remembered that Chase Crawford just moved out and I just saw an entertainment clip about Ed Westwick in NY buying a new bed. Chase did just have that big photo spread and was declared sexiest something according to PEOPLE.

figgy said...

Sean, good point overall, except for Jake G--he's definitely Toothy Tile.