Friday, July 24, 2009

Jessica Simpson Didn't Even Get A Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Fruity


The National Enquirer has a report this week that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson got into a huge fight on a recent drive. The drive was three hours long which is a very long time for two people who are probably thisclose to breaking up to have to sit next to each other. I mean there are only so many times Jessica could run through her reasons why she was going to go to her birthday party as Twist n Turn Barbie and how Ashlee was going to be the best Skipper ever.

So, Tony in a move that should ban him from ever getting another girlfriend pulled over into an IHOP parking lot and told Jessica to get out. He then left her there. He didn't come back and didn't call to check on her. He just left her. Jessica had to wait in the parking lot for 2 hours for someone to come pick her up. I'm not sure why she waited in the parking lot when just inside the double doors that never close she could have had the Chocolate Chip pancakes or their new Butterscotch Rocks pancakes. I mean she could have spent the two hours in a glorious carb loaded frenzy of fun and instead chose to spend it sitting on a curb wondering if Ken Paves could be her Ken.

33 comments:

Anonymous said...

That sucks. I know she's dumb and talentless, but she's still human and that's a crappy way to treat another human.

.robert said...

See, if he'd gone with "Woman, Please God Can You Just Shut Up" then she would have demanded he stop the car and got out.

Seriously, they were together for years and what, he just snapped? Were there any other incidents that are even 10% this bad?

MISCH said...

NO ONE DESERVES THAT ! BAD MOVE TONY.

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Is it bad that, on some level, I find this funny? If I were Jessica Simpson I would be planning my revenge.

Moosefan said...

Okay really?
And her and her fame whoring family did not call the paparazzi? She is known all over the place and there is NO PICTURES OF THIS? Someone trying to get some extra money did not snap a pic of her sitting in the parking lot, texting, questioning as to how they get those chickens of the sea to breathe under water?
I am calling BS on this one from Natty Inc.

Cancan said...

No photos? Didn't happen.

MontanaMarriott said...

Jessica Simpson go inside IHOP and be tempted to EAT?!?!
R U CRAZY?!?! lol

Sue Ellen Mishkey said...

Cancan and Moosefan:

Of course it didn't happen, look who the sources are, but it's still funny!!

Weezie said...

Um, yeah, it was a dick move, but it could have been worse. He could have kicked her out on the highway in the middle of the night. OR, he could have bashed her face against the dashboard multiple times and apologize with a piece of blinged out crap that says "Oops!"

He's no prize, but he's not the lowest of the low.

ThoughtElf said...

Really, this is no more shocking then when Barbie dumped Ken for Blaine, the sleezy surfer, after 43years.

The both bring to mind a favourite saying:

"Body by Nautilus; Mind by Mattel."

Dianne P said...

In a situation like that, I would almost definitely have the chocolate chip pancakes with a side of fries and I might even have fried mozzarella sticks or something like that if I was truly distraught.

The other thing I would consider doing would be hitch-hiking till someone cute came along and then going somewhere for hot cheap sex.

The news item just doesn't add up for me. Still, it is fun to think how I would handle that scenario.

Kelli said...

I know she isn't the brightest bulb in the box, but damn, she doesn't deserve for men to keep treating her like crap. Nick would put her down on national tv, John did the dirty shit he did to her and now this? God, I feel bad for her.

kris said...

I wonder if IHOP still has potato pancakes. God, I loved those!!!

Anyway, I feel sorry for her...the media just continues to rip on her. She's not emotionally strong enough to be famous. I'd tell everyone to F off ...anyway, whether Tony did this or not, he's still a douche.

Unknown said...

Blogger Pandora said... "Body by Nautilus; Mind by Mattel."

Heh! Heh! Heh!

Moosefan said...

I love the steak and eggs! and look, the carbs do not count during stressful times as these.

laura381 said...

Your description of those delicious pancakes is more interesting than Jessica Simpson's entire career.

Carrie L. said...

I don't know. Wouldn't Jessica have Twittered this or something? And wouldn't Papa Joe have been in the back seat of the car, or in a limo following them? Something doesn't seem right. I think someone (um, Joe) is trying to make Tony look bad.

lmnop123 said...

Aww... this makes her sound dumber than dumb if that's possible. I hope this is just a lie.

GoGo said...

I know Enty wouldn't post this if it wasn't true but are we ABSOLUTELY certain this isn't just crap that spewed from Pimpy Joe? Are there sources? Did someone at IHOP get a photo of her waiting? I just cannot believe ANYONE could do something so... so... so... douchey!

I ne'er really liked JS but I am really starting to feel for this poor girl. TR sounds like he's always been an f'ing loser! I ne'er e'en heard of him until he became JS's BF. I think JS has at least a litle class and is just twittering the good parts... gotta give her kudos for that.

My advice: stay single and play the field. Young and beautiful (and yes, I think she really is sometimes) doesn't last fore'er... and quit playing it dumb! It's not cute anymore.

Anonymous said...

If this had happened to me and I were Jessica (which I obviously am not), I wouldn't want anyone to know. Especially at the time. I think the fact that it is coming out now is a play on her part for sympathy and to stay in the headlines. That being said, it still stinks that he did that to her. I am guessing it did happen.

Rufus II said...

My brother in law did the same thing to my not famous sister. Put her out at night, in the middle of Houston, Texas, where she didn't no a soul, and could have dissappeared off the face of the earth and we would have never been able to find her.
I don't find this funny. But at least he let her out in a place were she could have gotten help. My sister had to walk to the nearest gas station, which there was one close by, fortunatley. She called Dumbass and he came back and got her as soon as he found a place to turn around. And no, my siste is not the type who would drive anyone crazy enough to do that. However, my brother in law is crazy. Period.

Katy said...

If that is true, he left her there, he is a Turd and a Tool to the tenth power. That is downright cruel, and dangerous.

Goodgrief said...

I really have my doubts that this actually happened. If in fact it did, then she must have been driving him up a wall and he couldn't take it anymore. Just dumping her out is better than beating her up first. Yes CB, I am referring to you. I can see where Jessica would get on most people's nerves. She seems very annoying.

Unknown said...

What a dick! Isn't he a cheater, too?
Asshole.

jax said...

of course there aren't pics..if it was a 3 hour drive then why would be paps hanging out at an ihop in the desert??

i believe it, sad. and he's a douche.

strawberrygirl said...

I have never cared for Jessica, but she seems like a nice enough girl and that is just a dick move if he did do that. Childish really.

Vanessa said...

if this is true...its horrible but it is better than him hitting her if he couldn't control his rage.

Wil said...

Damn! Again - no love loss for Jess .. but what a jerk!

audrey said...

Oh come on, even someone as dumb as dirt is going to go inside an overdose on carbs. Nothing aids in broken hearts like a stack of pancakes doused in Strawberry syrup with a side of whipped cream. I don't think this is real or we would have heard about it before now. Tabloids have obviously hired some of those out of work soap opera writers.a

PJ Nelson said...

That's. F'ing. Cold. I don't care how pissed he was, no one deserves that. He doesn't deserve anyone if this story is true.

Hope said...

If this story really is true, it's pathetic that Jessica then gave him the opportunity to break up with her the night before her birthday.

dollface said...

To have to go from John Mayer to this, it just goes from bad to worse.

bionic bunny! said...

to be fair, maybe she didn't go inside because, like me, she prefers denneys.
or the waffle house.
he's a total toad for doing this.

the asshole drove off and left me in a parking lot once because i wouldn't sign up with some income-tax dodging idiots he was idolizing at the moment. i pointed out that even their grasp on U.S. history was faulty, but he ordered me to sign, and i refused.
wonder what tony and jess argued about?

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