Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Blind Item #2

For the past five days this former B list actress who divided her time between movies and television fairly equally has been stalking a Columbia University student. They hooked up last Thursday night and since he left her place she has followed him pretty much non-stop or camped out in front of his place. She freaked him out when she claimed they were soul mates after they had known each other for three hours which also included the time for sex in that three hours.

85 comments:

LottaColada said...

Bynes?

auntliddy said...

Im sensing a bunny boiler!! " i wont be ignored" lol

Basil said...

Amanda Bynes was my thought to.

FSP said...

Like

Cathy said...

Bynes was my first thought too.

All about Eve said...

@Lotta, you got it, Miss Bynes for sure but the question is did he murder her vagina??

LottaColada said...

Apparently so, she seems dickmatized.

VIPblonde said...

@All About Eve Luckily, Amanda Bynes' vagina is like a horror movie villain. No matter how many times you stab it, that thing just won't die!

Tetsuo said...

spaz

ethorne said...

Lolol @ VIP! And then you have all the shitty sequels: Amanda's Vagina 6: Vag Goes to Hell, Amanda's Vagina 8: Vag in Space...

All about Eve said...

Hahaha!! @VIP!

libby said...

I really preferred the superior FIRST sequel-- "Amanda's Vagina 2: Ravenous Bugaboo."

Unknown said...

LOL @ VIP and Ethorne

VIPblonde said...

Amanda Bynes 4: Cumming in the back door

ethorne said...

And the popular mash-up Vag vs. Ass: The Final Vagina

VIPblonde said...

@ethorne Which of course co-stars Lindsay Lohan, who always shows up for a good ass to ass scene!

libby said...

At the end of every sequel though, there has to be a dramatic scene like at the end of every Charlton Heston movie....'YOU BLEW IT UP!!!'

or: 'Amanda's vagina IS PEOPLE!!!!'

libby said...

'I AM Amanda's Vag'
'I'M Amanda's Vag.'
'I AM AMANDA'S VAG!'

VIPblonde said...

@libby Can a bunch of Oompa Loompas file out of her vag like a clown car at the end and sing a cautionary song? :)

Unknown said...

J love hewett - she always goes head first with guys.... She's a nutter!

Unknown said...

Don't they make romantic comedies with this same plot??

libby said...

VIP---LOL

'What do you court
When you type out
Skank tweets?

Negative attention,
Sized 'Kardashian-Seat'!'

ethorne said...

@VIP-I heard she was difficult on set & late every day.

a non a miss said...

Spoiler alert guys- her vagina has been dead the whole time!

SophiaB said...

Since it's a Columbia University student, this is in New York. I don't think JLove is anywhere near NY and she is too busy wrangling her girls for publicity to be stalkin' some university dude across the country.

Gotta be Bynes.

Just wondering how the guy got past the tabloid nut queen persona, hat, glasses, straw hair wig, cheek piercings and nenu nenu sqwauking noises coming outa her mouth.

DAMN THAT GIRL GOT GAME!

Blake Lively take note!! She is better than YOU.

Bluezz said...

You guys are hilarious! HAHAHA!

Pip said...

Nooooooooo, RCB!

SophiaB said...

And isn't it WEIRD that the celebrity is doing the stalking? Except for Blohan stalking that bald guy from The Wanted, what other celeb do we know of who DOES that??!! RIGHT?

Gayeld said...

*snicker*

VIPblonde said...

@ethorne True, but she brought her own props and delivered an Oscar-worthy performance! Or AVN-worthy, at least!

ethorne said...

And the twist is that the Vagina didn't know it was dead either.

Anon said...

Considering what happened to Hugh Jackman,why don't folks take female stalkers seriously???

Unknown said...

I am just cracking up in my office! Brilliant! Oh the Oompa Loompa song by Libby killed me!

ethorne said...

@VIP-Even though she made a huge fuss about 2nd billing & pulled a Kanye at the Scream awards.

a non a miss said...

James Franco stalks college girls so theres another example.

VIPblonde said...

The second twist is that the vagina is really a man!!!! (Yes, that's a Sleepaway Camp shout out)

VIPblonde said...

@libby Extra points for squeezing in a Kardashian reference!!!!

VIPblonde said...

@ethorne I heard they both left with Charlie Sheen

Pip said...

The guy from Home Alone stalked the ginger woman from Homicide: Life on the Streets.

Its just U said...

@I loved the fourth one, I think, where they exorcised the vag demon. Man, the stuff that thing spewed out was craaaazy!!!

ethorne said...

VIP-I did not see that one coming

ethorne said...

@itsjustu-I heard people were throwing up in the movie theaters it was so bad.

Happy Chocolatini said...

This thread is hilarious lmao

Count Jerkula said...

I can see my services are not needed in this thread. You ladies are doing fine on your own. Great Job and Thanks for the Laughs!

VIPblonde said...

@Count We left room for you. Sequels 3, 5, and 7 still need names :)

Count Jerkula said...

OK

Amanda Bynes 3: The Vagina Takes Manhattan (currently being filmed)

AB5: The Vagina Strikes Back (the murderer gets warts would be the plot line)

AB7: The Good, the Bad and the Vagina

ethorne said...

Don't forget the Lifetime movie 'What I Like About Vagina: The Amanda Bynes Story'

Robin the Mad Photographer said...

I can't leave you people alone for a minute, can I? I go check my e-mail, and come back to vaginas spewing all over the damn place--it's like an OB-GYN convention in hell!

;-)

VIPblonde said...

@ethorne Where the part of Amanda Bynes is of course played by Tori Spelling. The vagina will be played by the giant gaping hole between Tori's boobs

Unknown said...

you guys ROCK! LMFAO! thanks for making my day. :-)

ethorne said...

Jennie never forgave Tori for that one.

Kelly Simmons said...

I am just so relieved that no one said Chloe Moretz.

By the time i got through yesterday's BIs I actually knew how to spell her name.

ethorne said...

Well Kelly, I guess you didn't see Amanda's Vagina 12: Daughter of Vag, starring Chloe Moretz.

Kelly Simmons said...

DAMMIT! I guess her name must be uttered at least once a day.

Jennifer H. said...

Is Bynes really dividng her time equally between TV and movies? I guess I am, too. I equally do neither one.

Count Jerkula said...

OOOOOOH I know:

AB X: The Vagina Horror Picture Show. I'm always for Meatloaf getting work.

ethorne said...

She had to take vocal lessons for that one.

katydid said...

I like the one where she turns her life around and becomes a detective trying to find other murdered vaginas,
Amanda Bynes Redemption, Vag of Honor. That one's on Lifetime too.

All about Eve said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
All about Eve said...

What? Nobody has seen AB XXX: What a vagina wants: A pounding? They had to make a new rating system for it it was so raunchy

VIPblonde said...

@katydid I hope it's a buddy cop movie, and the buddy is a chimpanzee!

Renoblondee said...

Thanks for this thread you awesome people you! I needed the laughs!
Said in The Amanda Show voice "Vagina please!"

Robin the Mad Photographer said...

Vagina: The Revenge--"this time it's personal".

Oh, and if we say Chloe's name 3 times, does that mean Sav shows up just like Beetlejuice?

Its just U said...

I really liked the spin-off critter one, where the crabs mutated and terrorised a farming town.

Bluezz said...

@Robin +1 I'm trying to hide my giggling from Mr. Bluezz right now. I'm supposed to be doing something else & I'm getting serious side-eye. Ha-ha! I better get back to work. :-)

libby said...

Thanks guys---I am dying too! I just got back. hahhahaaha

Bluezz said...

@ethorne Oh Shit! LMAO! Darn you, ethorne! I should've never scrolled down. I just LOL & totally got busted by Mr. Bluezz. HAHAHA!

I have to seriously leave & get back to work. You guys rock!

All about Eve said...

@Robin, should we go for it? Lol

All about Eve said...

I hear there's a new one coming out, The Sisterhood of the Traveling Vaginas starting Amanda, LILO, KK and Paris Hilton.

Kelly Simmons said...

Omg Vag of Honor. Teehee

di butler said...

Yes! You are on fire, as usual.

katydid said...

Love it!

Silly Girl said...

And the epilogue.....The Vagina Diaries.....

ethorne said...

Sofia Coppola directed The Vagina Suicides.

Primadiva said...

Just saw this thread, you guys are hilarious, My abs hurt from trying not to laugh so hard in my cube

Xander Simon Dyle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Xander Simon Dyle said...

@ethorne
Vagina Suicide is Amanda's one woman show...

Jenn said...

Walking Dead Vagina, or Getting Undead Head..the ultimate hoohah horror!
This list has made my crappy week a little better, thanks everyone!

Sherry said...

BEST POST EVER!!! Kudos to you all. Thanks for the laughs.

Jaiden_S said...

Isn't Bynes in LA? Columbia is in NYC. No way she's able to fly.

Count Jerkula said...

She been livin in NYC for a while now. Got out of LA after all them car incidents.

Anna said...

What if the Colombia University student IS James Franco? Getting yet another degree? Puts a new spin on it. I'll guess Katy Holmes just because I think it would be hilarious if Katy turned out to have been the creeper in the Holmes/Cruise relationship.

Anna said...

*Colombia*. I didn't mean to move the blind to an entirely different country.

Amelia Merritt said...

@ethorne Pun intended??

Amelia Merritt said...

If you say her name three times in a mirror she will appear to you.

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