Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Olivia Thirlby Who?


Have you heard of Olivia Thirlby? Yes, she was in Juno and played Leah. Other than that? Nothing. Well guess what? She's in a new film called The Wackness with Mary Kate Olsen and Ben Kingsley. Still haven't heard of her? Well she got hired to co-star with Seth Rogen in his new film Pineapple Express. Then she must have pissed someone off or been the worst actress in the world because they fired her. Do you know how bad you have to suck to get fired after they hire you? She must have pissed off someone or, as I said she could have been the worst actress in the world. I tend to think it is a little bit of both. She got replaced by Amber Heard. You remember Amber don't you? I had some of her photos on the site recently and all of you said she looked like death. How bad do you have to suck in this world to be replaced by death? The producers were so desperate to get rid of you they chose a woman who made those recent Courtney Love photos look like a f**king Hawaiian Tropic ad.

Anyway, the reason this has me all worked up is because of all of you. See, in an attempt to give you more snark with more access, I arranged for someone to go screen The Wackness and then on Thursday is doing these little roundtables with the stars of the film that are made available. Richard, who has written a couple of things for the site is doing the interviews. So you know there will be snark. Well Mary Kate and Ben Kingsley aren't doing any press for this film. That leaves the second rung of actors in the film. Method Man definitely on board with CDAN. Josh Peck? Absolutely wants to do it.

Olivia Thirlby? Her reps decided that CDAN wasn't an appropriate site for her. An appropriate site? This b*tch can't get arrested. She should be sucking up to AARP magazine and Highlights for interviews. Not appropriate? You have got to f**king kidding me. See, the thing is, everyone who gets interviewed would probably get some love at least for a week or so. It isn't like you are going to be interviewed and then get a free pass forever. It doesn't work that way. But, at least you know you are going to get mentioned more frequently than you otherwise would and lets face it, I'm not going to be a complete ass to you.

HOWEVER, if your name is Olivia Thirlby you better never take a bad photo because it will be on the site constantly. You better never do something stupid like getting fired from an A list film like Pineapple Express. Whoops. Like Chutes and Ladders baby and you got that long ass chute that goes from like 99 back to 6. Olivia better never smoke or drink in public. She better never do anything anytime because frankly, she isn't good enough to tell you or me or any of us to f**k off. If she thinks she's good enough now, what happens when she finally does sleep with the right person and gets a movie? Then what? She will be an even bigger b*tch.

Now with that being said, enjoy the interviews Richard. Make sure you ask Method Man and Josh Peck if she was a b*tch to them also.

22 comments:

lutefisk said...

Maybe we cans ship her off with the shanks to Gary Glitter.

jlb said...

LOL Ent - love the tag "people who peaked in high school" - oh so true.

mooshki said...

Hah! Hell hath no fury like an Enty scorned.

Unknown said...

" jlb said...
LOL Ent - love the tag "people who peaked in high school" - oh so true."

I almost peed a little with that one.

A Pimp Named DaveR said...

Method Man????

Well then, who the hell NEEDS Olivia whats-her-name! M to tha E-T-H-O-D~!

mags said...

LOL.

Love this gem,

"How bad do you have to suck in this world to be replaced by death?"

Anonymous said...

I LOVE Method Man. Olivia sounds like a cunt. They probably didn't want to her have to stand up to the scrutiny we CDAN put celebrities through. They knew we'd rip her to shreds. How sad for them that we'll do it anyway whether she's here or not.

MnGddess said...

Method Man is da bomb.

And Enty, what the..?? You really came down hard on Olivia. Your're like the Hollywood Mafia or something. I would hate to cross your path LOL...

I'm just picturing Enty sitting behind his rather huge mahogany desk, rather like Marlon Brando in The Godfather, saying in that raspy voice..."you better neva' take a bad photo..."

And what does that make all of us? His capos?

what is eight past six? said...

"Hah! Hell hath no fury like an Enty scorned."

If there is one thing I've noticed Ent can't stand, it's people with huge egos, and especially those with egos so huge they think they are too good to do press or interviews. So you know Miss Thirlby messed up when he's bitching at HER instead of Mary Kate and Ben Kingsley, who aren't doing any press for the movie at all.

I actually was inclined at first to think that she may not have such a large ego, she just has a really terrible rep - that happens. But then he re-emphasized that she got fired. And I started speculating that it was because she DID piss someone off with her ego, maybe some diva-ish demands that she couldn't even be bothered to make directly, she had her rep do it for her. Who knows. Who cares? Point is, either can the bitchiness, or lose the crappy rep. You're not at all in the position to keep either.

Man, when that movie comes out and there is a review here she better be FLAWLESS. Or else she will get ripped.

But whatever, I'm with pimp - I love Method Man!

Anonymous said...

remind me to never piss off Ent. crikey.

And I think the reason why Ent's not mad at Ben and Mary Kate is because they're supporting people in the movie. Typically those are not the people that do the publicity.

I'm looking forward to Richard's interviews.

califblondy said...

Let it go, Ent, the little witch ain't worth it. Being vengeful causes wrinkles. I never heard of this do nothing little girl before and would prefer to never hear about her again.

UNLESS, she's caught doing drugs in public or some guy (Ben?) in a bathroom stall. I don't mind reading that kind of stuff.

jax said...

lol..Method Man is going to tear it up! lovvve him. bring some munchie money Richard.

lutefisk said...

califblondy--Ben in a toilet stall??
Are you hinting at something we should know about?? lmao!

Winston Ono said...

Dude, relax. You sound like an Orange County Housewife.

Carte Blanche said...

"Hah! Hell hath no fury like an Enty scorned."

LOL
Luv me a good Ent B*tch Rant

gossip said...

LMAO I'm surprised you didn't get Lauren to give her a call to do a favour for your site after they starred in Dream of the Romans together.

gossip said...
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gossip said...
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schneefloeckli said...

Wow, after having to put up with katherine Heigl and her ego while filming "Knocked Up", you'd think they'd be used to this kind of diva behaviour...

RagDoll said...

I think Olivia's flack is the intended target. And I think the mark has been hit. Watch this kid do the CDAN intervew. If not, I bet she gets a new mouthpiece.

Unknown said...

Hey schneefloeckli - I think Hiegl is what pushed them over the edge where they said, "never again".

Judi said...

Oh, please. Miss Thing isn't doll enough to be this difficult.

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