Thursday, August 02, 2018

Blind Item #8 - Casting Call #1 - A Dancing Boy Blind Item

So, who wants to play the dancing boy - my teen likeness, I mean? He may not be reading this, but he's out there somewhere, and maybe you know him. Maybe he's your son, a nephew, or member of your local theater troupe. He will be blond, and blue-eyed, with few and probably no professional credits. He'll also be well qualified to join the better half of a secret global elite - it's Hollywood branch, more specifically - with training in martial arts, oratory, politics, table tennis (among other skills...okay kidding: training will be provided by celebrity experts, and footage included in the first dancing boy short). And, if it all works out, it's a role that could last for two or more decades (after which, beginning in the present day, I take over). Message me privately on twitter (I don't bite, unless bitten first).

80 comments:

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

odd years: Dancing Boy
Even years: Dancing Boy Chronicles
Post 2020, summer/winter releases alternating franchises in the Dancing Boy Cinematic Universe

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Haha just kidding Dancing Boy is obviously just David Geffen catfishing CDAN

longtimereader said...

To continue the discussion, anyone who puts mayo on their chips/fries needs shooting. That's disgusting.

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

"I saw the two words 'Dancing Boy' and was suddenly rendered illiterate!"

Tuesdi said...

Time for some Pickle Talk

Thonker said...

@longtimereader shoot me *hairflip*

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Subtext: industry meta about to enter a paradigm shift, especially with all sorts of metaHollywood horror stories being produced into films.

"I hope you went to community college, bucko, otherwise you're too much of a stupid poor to understand my fancy literary and philosophical comments"

*can't parse a DB blind and incessantly communicates this fact through every DB comment section.*

ReallyDonna said...

“Tartar House Rules” - next DB film

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

You're going to watch it at Cannes and Sundance and you're going to LIKE IT

Or join Clooney et al. along the wall out back

totaji said...

Wow I’m surprised to see such racism here. I for one want to see a black-trans Dancing Neutral.

Unknown said...

Here's the funny/sad part: he will get inquiries, even from people here, despite making this look just like a predator's recruitment attempt. That's how desperate some people are to make their kids famous.

"The script will make no sense
The plot will be impossible to follow"

Oh, so like a Disney Star Wars movie?

J said...

Just sad.

HeatherBee said...

*casting call #1* sounds ominous.

MeliticusBee said...

Ok - I am now, officially, OFF the dancing boy train
Kinda felt bad for him at first
but now - not only is this story incomprehensible, never goes anywhere, isn't a blind at all...
now trolling for participants

Creepy

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

"Since our white cis male hegemonic leadership was just eradicated by Kylo Ren and the First Order, I present to you the new leader of THE #RESISTANCE, Vice Adm. Purple Hair Dern of the cruiser 'Open Society.'

DERN: "Thank you. How old Carrie Fisher was when Lucas casting couched her is neither here nor there. Her passing was tragic and unexpected."

FINN: "This sucks let's go play craps."

Dahling said...

@J - boy am I with ya!

..... "And I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad, The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had.... I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take, When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world, mad world ...... fades.

J said...

I like Tears for Fears.

And I highly doubt the there will be a two-decade run for a showcase of Dancing Boy's oratory and martial arts skill.

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

You're obviously not a post-2016 DSA tankie revolutionary against fascism in Drumpf's AmeriKKKa

sandybrook said...

Anyone here ever eat cheese curds or poutaine (sp?)

Sara, Making It Work said...

@dahling
LOVE that song! I saw them last year. Sadly, Curt's voice is not what it used to be, but Roland sounded great, and the band was perfect.

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Yes.
What verbal abuse do I win from you today?

Ophelia said...

@sandybrook I'm not a fan myself but my sister will seek out restaurants that serve poutine

Tuesdi said...

@Sandy HELL YES. Poutine is big in Northern Maine. Although so many places just use regular cheese instead of cheese curds. Poutine is straight from heaven.

hhstarr said...

I cant fathom putting my child through this. First of all, he is delusional. Second, let's just pretend what he says is true. Here is a man who was abused as a child actor, wanting a child actor to play him, obviously being abused in a film. Unless he gets all hot and bothered seeing kids being abused, why would he want to submit a kid to that fantasy? As a victim of childhood abuse myself, I know that not all abused people go on to be abusive, but plenty do. He seems to get really excited when thinking of his past abuse. Nope, wouldn't get near him.

hhstarr said...

Fried cheese curds are delish. Of course those of us in SC like fried food.

totaji said...

I’m partial to deep fried Cheese Curds with Buffalo hot sauce. Soooooo good.

sandybrook said...

I've heard cheese curds as a dish is big in Wisconsin. I know poutine is big in places in NE Canada and US near the Canadian border. I think I'd like poutine not sure about cheese curds.

totaji said...

+1 lol

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

I don't think you "get" "art."

(Google "Podesta art collection")

ReallyDonna said...

Portlandia Poutine served in a local restaurant. Fries, chicken-fried steak scraps, cheese curds, and fried PICKLED jalapeños on top.

ReallyDonna said...

And sausage gravy.

RIV1972 said...

Does he think real people are actually going to audition?

sandybrook said...

Donna that sounds really interesting

AkhaldanSolo said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tuesdi said...

@Sandy you would like the cheese curds. When they are all melty in the poutine they mostly taste like any other cheese. Plus the whole mess with all the gravy etc is so heavy it is not exactly a nuanced dish. It is the junkiest of junk food and will make your ass MASSIVE. God DAMN I love it.

Guesser said...

Maybe Dancing Boy did this to make a point? We all noticed. Maybe he was testing us? Or maybe it is someone Catfishing! There is no blind! The pickles turned out great,BTW.

AkhaldanSolo said...

Not that they really have any choice, I think it's a compulsion thing, but it's interesting to see those that so wholeheartedly despise DB blinds keep coming back for more. Idk, fun observation I have no clue as to what it means.

DB put kind of a screech in my brain when I read that part about table tennis - is that a tacit approval of his own belief in Pizzagate?

"Witness the tremendous, but transitory, vogue of ping-pong and diabolo. Those games in which perfection is impossible never cease to attract."
-Aleister Crowley

https://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/crowley/lies/49.htm

See what significance Ping-Pong really has in these peoples lives.

https://youtu.be/hNHHoJLoLM4

Remember, Alefantis FIRST Comet Ping Pong style "restaurant", "Doktor Pong" in Berlin, Germany, was a honey pot for youths when he noticed that ping pong is the only low-cost sport for plebeian youths in every sad town from Muncheberg to Kosovska and Bucak, Turkey. Simple pizza tosser huh, ummm, no.

Pinging Doktor Pong
https://rense.com/general96/capricciopizza8.htm

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Alefantis? I believe you mean Rothschild

sandybrook said...

Tuesdi we have a lot of Wisconsoners (wisconsinites?) where I am, so I bet I can find me a restaurant that sells it. If I find one I'd try it as an appetizer at least. I guess I'm just put out by the word "curd". I do like cheeses of all kinds.

Farmgirl said...

Just had my first poutine last weekend!
Fantastic

Farmgirl said...

We had reuben poutine with fries, curd,corned beef, kraut, thousand island and swiss.

sandybrook said...

I just had a corned beef, Cole slaw, thousand island dressing, Swiss cheese hero with fries on the side Farmgirl. Now all that together was yummy. I love Reubens too.

Satan 666 said...

I love the Way cheese curds squeak in your teeth! I love poutine, just gravy, cheese curds, and fries.

Tuesdi said...

I like Turkey Reubens better. These Dancing Boy blinds make me hungry.

Satan 666 said...

Oh, and GTFO with this stupid bullshit, DB. You are delusional.


Sara, Making It Work said...

Lololololol

RowdyRodimus said...

"Dancing Boy is the code name for America's daring, highly trained special mission force. It's mission; to defend human freedom against PEDO the ruthless terrorist organization determined to rule Hollywood."-
Intro from the soon to be aired pilot of the highly anticipated "Dancing Boy: The Animated Series" produced by DIC Entertainment; Ages 5 and up; airing Monday through Friday following "Bible Man".

Each episode concludes with a tip about safety by one of the Dancing Boy team.

For release: Dancing Boy: The Animated Series is gearing up for the ginchiest, heppest year yet! Along with the Dancing Boy Cinematic Universe and ground breaking Animated Series (with character designs by Christian Weston "Sonichu" Chandler) a new 3 3/4 inch action figure line produced by the returning MEGO is set to debut alongside the new series. Along with the myriad assorted licensed products such as coloring books, early learning workbooks, clothing, and chewable vitamins- 2019 is going to be the Year of Dancing Boy! You (and your kids!) don't want to be left out of all the fun, adventure, learning, romance and God Delusions.

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Hired!

RowdyRodimus said...

Thank you, Sir. You are a gentleman and a scholar so if I may add just a hint of mirth to your day I consider it a successful and productive day.

#TEAMGEELJIRE CLASSIC said...

Yeah it was you not me who uncorked the Chrischan bottle here

CDAN just jumped 7 sharks all at once

That's a really strange gangstalking and targeted harassment thing that metastasized into something even I couldn't begin to explain.

RowdyRodimus said...

Yeah, I honestly felt sorry for him in the beginning. When they posted his # online, I called him to wish him a Happy Birthday. He seemed touched that someone was just trying to be nice to be nice without trolling him.

However, once he got into stalking random women and harassing that game store owner and pepper spraying a Gamestop employee because he didn't like the way Sega redesigned Sonic the Hedgehog (The only TRUE hedgehog is Ron Jeremy), all my sympathy went out the window.

ReallyDonna said...

Farm girl Reuben poutine sounds amazing, and gluten-free. I’m totally gonna try that at home. Thanks!

MeliticusBee said...

Holy crap
The comments in this blind are as hard to follow as DB.

@geel - is there just one of you here?

on another note
I prefer boudin to poutine
kek

Tricia13 said...

Wtf is going on here.
By the by... never had poutine but I like cheese at an almost alerting level....

Tricia13 said...

*alarming level

Amy said...

So Dancing Boy is using his abuse to abuse other boys?? That's exactly what it sounds like or is a trap and a game like all his blinds seem to represent. All in all, very creepy. My son would be the perfect candidate and that scares the shit out of me.

aanjheni said...

It is Wisconsite or the more informal Sconnie.

Cheesecurds are effin amazing. You can get them at Culvers but those are like frozen and breaded...not my favorite. The best are in dives, bars, or one of the many fairs. Basically, it is fresh cheddar cheese before it has been pressed into blocks and aged. Lightly battered with a good tempura or beer batter and damn, hot melty goodness.

I just had a thought...what if Dancing Boy is CDaN's Qanon??!!??!!

Unknown said...

I would NEVER let my kids audition for this.... I'm holding out for a remake of Lord of The Flies so they can do 8 yo full frontals again... ahh....those were the days, huh Plot?

GentleBreeze said...

Was waitin' for someone to mention Culvers. Cheese curds just sound revolting, but after reading these comments believe I'll give them a try. Oh, and MeticullisBee, Geeljire often refers to himself as #teamgeeljire.

Unknown said...

So is this the part of the ARG where we get to message Dancing Boy and he gives each of us cryptic personal instructions to meet at a dark field at midnight wearing giraffe costumes and carrying baskets filled with decorative soaps shaped like different state capitols?

Unknown said...

Unrelated to your comment, just asking cause I always notice your pic and it looks so familiar. Is that by chance the album cover for Dive by Tycho?

Unknown said...

Glad to see that I'm not the only one who hates those movies. I seriously feel like the average legitimate fanboy could write a better plot and characters. That Rogue One flaming shitbag of a movie was basically capture the flag for 3 hours.

Unknown said...

Totally agree.

Unknown said...

I actually agree. He seems to have an overly intensive focus on the abuse.

Unknown said...

He will end up choosing the most visually similar teen mannequin

Unknown said...

Ghog that is fucking beautiful. Who is the right nut then?

Unknown said...

Omg thank you for reminding me of the existence of Bible man

Unknown said...

Wait who are you talking about? That's nuts

Unknown said...

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but they actually are remaking Lord of the Flies, but with girls -- because if you take an old plot and change the gender/race/sexuality of the characters, it's totally original.
I saw the original movie when I was about 16 and I really enjoyed it. But I don't remember there being nudity. I'm also not a pedo so that may have just gone over my head.

Rosie riveter said...

Iowa:
I Oughta Went Around

Rosie riveter said...

Omg I'm hungry.

laganja estranja said...

can we please stop with these? they're getting annoying and are unbelievably fake and convoluted by now, which would be fine if they weren't getting more and more frequent

plot said...

@laganja

Enty is out of material and his imagination is limited (see the repeat blinds over the last month.) Since Weinstien, Spacey, Rattner and Singer are all under investigation and gone to ground, Enty can no longer writer One Size Fits All blinds about them. We know.

So he is trying to keep this site alive by copying bullshit from Qanon, claiming all murders have pedo connections and what not, and writing these Dancing Boy blinds.

Yes, the site has degraded quite a bit.

Thot Crimes said...

@plot - And yet, here you are, every day, living your best life, defending pedophilia.

plot said...

@Pickle

Where have I defended pedophilia?

See, if any of you enthusiasts for Qanon's Thrilling Pedo Hunt are questioned at all, you scream pedo at the questioner.

You have to see the stupidity of that reflex.

sandybrook said...

dont have Culvers @aanjheni down here, Ill search for a restaurant and/or bar, fresh made is better than frozen anything anyway. I can definitely find versions of poutine here, even something called a garbage pail that comes from upstate NY, it seems very similar to some of the poutines people listed.

Unknown said...

"Hey let me tell you about all the molesters and monsters in Hollywood"

"Oh by the way could you send one of your friends or family members to audition for a movie in the same industry?"

Yeah, thanks but no thanks...

shakey said...

rosie riveter - I've been to Iowa. I agree.

sandybrook - when you try poutine, make sure it's with cheese curds and the fries are made from *red* potatoes. Best french fries ever, and it's traditionally used for poutine here in Quebec. Different places add different things, but I've stuck with the original. Now I'm relegated to eating from either the husband's or son's poutine, but I'm at peace with that now.

shakey said...

Oh and I forgot - Dancing Boy, if you think I want my 17 year-old son auditioning for a role in Hollywood, forget it.

Melissa Lyn said...

Sounds like that scumbag Feldman.

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