Monday, August 27, 2007

Teen Choice Awards

My shirts never look that starched even when I'm picking them up at the cleaners. Of course, my "cleaners" is the lady two doors down who offers "lawndry" service.
David Boreanaz just looks thrilled to be there. Either that or he's staring down Deryck Whibley before he steals his wife and makes her dress like a real person. It's just not interesting anymore and that fake smile is really starting to piss me off.
If you love curves, I know you love America. If you love half naked world leaders, then you probably love Russia.
If you like guys dressed as chicks, then you probably love Fergie.

If you like your ex-strippers turned rappers, and I do, then you must love Eve, and I do as well.
You know. Ludacris and Emmy would make a cute couple.
You realize that when Spade leans back, this shirt exposes the belly. That's just what every middle age out of shape guy needs to be showing the world. Probably how he got Heather Locklear. She's into middle age belly button lint.
Speaking of belly button lint. Anyone want to start a Megan Fox is pregnant rumor? Brian Austin Green has to figure out someway to keep her.
I know Miley Cyrus is on Disney, but I don't think she's required to wear a picture of the Hundred Acre Woods on her dress.
Are they doing a Mario Brothers sequel that no one told me about?
Jessica. Everyone will still love you if you eat something. This is getting ridiculous.
Sometimes you just can't tell the difference between Haylie and Hilary. Hilary should be very scared of that.
Zac, you may want to smile. You think you are super hot right now and nothing will ever go wrong. Everyone thinks you are a sex symbol and love you and girls scream. Won't ever change right? You may want to...
Say hi to Matthew Lawrence and ask him about his family."I'm touching a woman. It will be over soon. Imagine it's Cher."
Yes, the one hand in the pocket hug shows how much you really care.
I had a Waiting, Van Wilder doubleheader over the weekend so I will overlook all Ryan's Jeremy Piven like qualities and focus on the positives.

14 comments:

Ice Angel said...

Matt,

I love you to death, but please stop hating on Zac and Miley. These are actually some GOOD role models (at least so far) for the kids out there to replace the horrible ones that have been out there so far.

Zac is adorable and sweet. I actually think he's cuter when he doesn't smile because his smile is kind of goofy. And Miley looks ADORABLE and most importantly AGE APPROPRIATE!!!!

Now hate away on that Avril thing all you want!

LOL

Tracee said...

Oooh. The Rock looks so do-able in that photo. Thanks for putting him first Ent. You just made by Monday feel like a Wednesday.

Fabiola Thing said...

The comment about Matthew Lawrence seems like it is a clue to a BI. Which one?

HolyGirl427 said...

Wait...Ryan Reynolds is a jackass? Say it ain't so!

HolyGirl427 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kim said...

Did I miss something? When did we learn that Ent's name is Matt?

Kim said...

Fabiola, I don't remember what the blind was about, but maybe it is the one with the 'holier than thou art family'?

mngddess said...

You know Ent, one photo of the Rock is NOT enough. He is fine!

Snautrag said...

Humm, Ent, I think you need to have a word with ice angel before it's too late.

Ice Angel said...

Just reading back at my post and wow, someone must have put something in my coffee this morning! I have NO idea why I referred to Ent as Matt! Doh!

Also-Snautrag...what do you mean before it's too late?

brendalove@gmail.com said...

ENT - your cover is halfway blown....all we need now is a last name and an address to send fan-mail to....

april said...

I'm thinking that the comment about Megan Fox might be the answer to a BI as well, but I don't know which yet.
Every time I see Fergie I sing my version of one of the lines from 'Glamourous' to myself: "..Sipping reminiscing on days when I had a MUSTACHE". He he.

bluegirl said...

April, I think Megan Fox and BAG (Ha!) are the answer to this blind from a while back. It's been annoying me since I first read it:

This B list actor is starting to ride high. He has been in the business since he was a toddler but has just started to change everyone’s perceptions about him. He is loving life right now and in his mind things could not get any better. In addition to acting, he owns his own company with two of his friends. Moving from one project to the next and his rise up the ladder caught the eye of a still teenage C list actress on the way up. She has always moved from one guest spot to the next and always finds someone to sleep with at each of these stops. Whatever she is doing is working. Instead of one off guest spots, she is starting to get some multi-episode jobs from her grateful previous co-stars. She used our actor to gain a couple of film roles and now wants to move on. She is tired of sleeping over at his place, pretending to still like him and making small talk like she still cares. She has larger fish now to find in the film world. He is crazy about her, knows nothing of her past, and would be crushed to learn that she is using him and his name and is counting down the days until production starts on her new film next month. Thanks to his help, it is her biggest role yet and should vault her to the B list. But for him there will not be that fairy tale ending.

april said...

Bluegirl,
That's the BI I was thinking of! Great minds think alike, I guess. He he.

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