Thursday, February 28, 2019

Blind Items Revealed #1

February 20, 2019

Account being hacked for this alliterate former almost A- list mostly movie actress all of you know is code for I was wasted on a million drugs and spoke what was on my mind, but hey, at least I didn't try and kidnap children this time.

Lindsay Lohan

13 comments:

J said...

Meanwhile, flesh-eating viri seem to avoid her.

Come on, join forces with the other diseases! Let's do this!

Brayson87 said...

She does seem like an incubation chamber for STIs. Maybe she's just a carrier, a fire crotch typhoid mary?

astra worthington said...

Maybe she’s like Mr Burns. She has all of the diseases in the world, but they’re all in perfect balance with each other so she cannot die from them.

Count Jerkula said...

I doubt Lohan has anything worse than herps. She is basically a fuck pet for rich guys, so as responsible pet owners, they probably bring her to a vet each month for wormer, tests and shots. Dr probably even sells special bags of over priced whore food to rope rubes into buying.

Brayson87 said...

Yeah right, if your d!ck doesn't turtle at the sight of her you'd better make sure it hasn't fallen off because that is an involuntary reflex.

kelli grrrl said...

Count - I’d throw HPV in there too, as long as we’re guessing.

Count Jerkula said...

@kelli: true. She probably gets the visible rice krispies burned off and tells the trick the ones on the inside arent warts, but love bumps.

Count Jerkula said...

Brayson: there was a pic of her in a blue bikini a few yrs ago, and it looked like she had the ass of a 70y/o lady. Crack whores always seem to lose the ass first.

Brayson87 said...

@Count, It's true, I always figured it was because they were keistering their stash, you can see them walking down the street a mile away.

Count Jerkula said...

They aint keistering crack. Smoking it and getting the quick lung absorbsion is what pops the high.

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hunter said...

"Dr probably even sells special bags of over priced whore food"

too funny too funny

It's good to know if the Count had whores it sounds like they'd be well cared for with all their shots and a fully stocked basin of [vitamin enriched] whore food to keep their strength up.

Edward Corran said...

In 20 years time when the great minds of the day are tracking down the source of Super Aids it will invariably be traced back to a Miss Lohan in flagrante with a monkey and a Arab .

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