Monday, July 02, 2018

Blind Item #8 - A Birdie Blind Item

You can imagine what the tour bus would hide in the secret compartments:

You'll know him as the bassist of a permanent A list band. But being a good libertarian from an early age, he always had this other hustle - the same one, in fact, as the legendary franchise character (whose own movie recently flopped). Back in grade school, it was any kind of contraband: micronauts, 8 tracks, gum. Nowadays, it's something else: a product that's only recently been relegated to black market status in the city that made him famous.

37 comments:

L said...

Movie character is Han Solo, but i have no idea about the bassist

Lexi said...

Flea?

LooksLikeCRicci said...

I've been waaaaaiting for the Don Henley stuff. Have I missed it? Is this it? I can't tell.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

I was thinking the movie character is actually Superfly

Sara, Making It Work said...

@Melvin!
Seems like we haven't seen you in a while.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

Googling "libertarian bassists" comes up with Krist Novoselic of Nirvana, so I am going with him

Off With Her Head said...

black market = plastic straws in Seattle? tee hee

Melvin The Reanimated said...

I was on vacation, working a shit ton before that and dealing with some personal things, @Sara

totaji said...

Han Solo and bath salts? Flea seams way to knowledgeable to fuck with those. I could be wrong though.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

Ok, I think Han Solo (smuggler) makes more sense than Superfly (cocaine dealer.) However, I'd find it hilarious if this really was a blind about Novoselic smuggling plastic straws.

Stephie said...

Actually, aren't cut up plastic straws used to snort cocaine?

OB said...

Am I the only one here who's old enough to picture Ann-Margret in a yellow dress whenever a Birdie blind is posted?

🎶🎶 "Bye, bye Bird-hee"

I always laughed the way she pronounced iy!

Spider Rico said...

@lookslikcricci - Henley stuff has not been revealed nor will it ever b revealed. Don't hold your breath it's not happening.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

Goddammn, Stephie, you're right. Dolla bills, y'all, or straws. Novoselic is bringing in straws so people can snort coke. Good call.

My final answer:
Bassist: Krist Novoselic
Franchise character: Han Solo AND Superfly
activity: smuggling (Solo) plastic straws into Seattle so people can snort cocaine (Superfly)

Stephie said...

Melvin, all credit goes to you. Nice job!

Mo said...

Plastic straws are now on the black market?

Low Key said...

Glad to see you back, Melvin!

Sara, Making It Work said...

@Melvin TR
Glad to see you back!

Sara, Making It Work said...

The Seattle plastics ban also includes utensils.
So... basically this is just a joke blind saying Krist Novaselic brings conttaband plastics on tour everywhere.
I mean, there are worse things to write a blind about?

Lonely Bastard said...

@Melvin.

I now picture all these Seattle hipster douchebags standing arounf in their 1940s dresses and skinny jeans and beards after visiting the artisinal cupcake and microbrewery, looking nonplussed at line of white powder and saying, "How are we,like,supposed to,like get that shit up our noses?! Theres no, like, tiny plastic straws! Whatever can we, like, do?!"

sandybrook said...

Plastic straws pollute the environment because they can't be recycled or composted and paper straws are making a comeback

Sara, Making It Work said...

Didn't mean that question mark.
I am pro- silly blinds.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

@LonelyBastard, I am cracking up at that image. I needed that.

Melvin The Reanimated said...

And thanks everyone for welcoming me back

CL said...

We will just use the compostable straws 2 snort drugs as they will work just the same says the 60 year old woman who is off 2 royal cupcakes on my way to Cafe Vita for my half caf half decafe latte...generalize much lonely bastard...this is a joke blind.....wait maybe I will buy myself some of them skinny jeans🤣✌️

Christian Hollywood said...

Entry should write a letter to DoJ and LAPD about Henley and have commenters sign.
Daily Caller covered the story, Enty do the right thing.

Christian Hollywood said...

Let's meet at Beverly/Santa Monica and march til he's arrested.
Azoff and Albrecht have to go too.

Christian Hollywood said...

Citizens arrest anyone?

La-Juice said...

Hey all, regarding plastic straws... If you can get through this entire video without feeling an ounce of compassion and horror for what our waste does to other animals, then you can have your plastic straws (as long as I get to decide where to insert them):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4wH878t78bw

Brayson87 said...

What about those biodegradable plastic straws they have now? Are they banned as well?

Yeah I imagine we get to the after life and all those animal species are waiting there for us for some payback.

Poor Mick said...

Don't worry about Seattle, all the scary dweeby twenty-somethings that staff the cool bars will be gone in a few years as the remaining bits of the city are subsumed into the Borg. They've been trickling south to Portland for so long now the damn HBO series is almost over. Cross-state gentrification!

Zeroh Tollrants said...

Novoselic. Seattle.
He has warehouses full of plastic bags & drinking straws, and not only does he not recycle, he throws his plastic bottles and aluminum cans in the same bin as the veggie peels and egg shells, because he just doesn't have 2 f*cks to give.

emeraldcity said...

@Brayson87......the so called biodegradeable plastics do not actually disappear into thin air over time . All they do is break down into thousands of small plastic particles with means you have thousands of impossible to deal with plastic pieces rather than one big piece which can be collected . Plastics never die.

Aoife said...

My goodness this was really about plastic straws. I Googled "plastic straws" and found out about the ban in Seattle.

I've found out so many things here (sounding was the last) that I never believe anything is what it seems to be.

gossblogger said...

I remember a book many decades ago by some of Heidi Fleiss's girls from back in the day, 4 of them were telling their stories. I remember they all loved one of the Eagles as a client, perfect gentleman, sweetheart and they all despised another Eagle and I am pretty sure Don Henley is the latter I just can't remember the good guy. I was hoping for juicier relevations though I found the trips to Saudi Arabia that Heidt arranged for the Princes on a regular basis interesting.

Bill Beard said...

Gene Simmons or Novoselic.

SillyWhabbit said...

And since Seattle just banned plastic straws... I'd say +1

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