Monday, October 15, 2007

Austin and Jake Break Up


Ooops. My mistake. When I saw that Jake Gyllenhaal was telling everyone that he was now single, I just assumed that he and Austin Nichols broke up. I mean they haven't been hanging around together since Austin got busted for an alleged DUI, and so I figured Jake just decided he needed a more positive influence in his life.

So therefore I was shocked, shocked I tell you that Jake was confessing he was single to a television audience because he recently ended things with Reese Witherspoon. Kneepads Magazine made a big deal of how Jake and Reese didn't even talk to each other at the premiere of Rendition.

It was all part of the script people. The whole Reese and Jake thing was supposed to play out in an entirely different manner. It was supposed to be this torrid love affair with them meeting in hotels across the world and taking them right through the press for Rendition. The only problem was no one bought the damn act. It was as fake as a Paris Hilton smile. When the pair finally realized that the game was going to go nowhere, they just let it die a natural death and at the premiere made it look like there was this bitter breakup.

So, in the words of Jake, "Ah, at this point yes, on behalf of the ladies I’m single." Go for it ladies.

15 comments:

Simone said...

Whew! I thought for a minute that Toothy Tile is *really* single.

;-)

kellygirl said...

is there really a mag called "Kneepads"
LOL!!!

this guy gets more press out of the gay conjecture than anything he could get from "coming out"

great pubs!

Tania said...

Jake was making the 'on behalf of the ladies' distinction because the interviewer (Jonathan Ross)included his house band (Four Poofs and a Piano) in the interested parties! I doubt Ross really thought Jake would out himself, though - rudery and jokes about orientation are par for the course on his show.

Hez said...

KS, I think Kneepads Magazine is the sister publication of the slightly racier Knob-slobbing Weekly. ;)

Anonymous said...

kneepads = people

wood1107 said...

They were the fakiest-fake fakers in the whole faking world. I didn't buy him and Reese for a second. He and Austin are adorable together and ooze homo-hotness. I hope for his sake he comes out one day (if, in fact, he is gay. He sure knows how to play this 'is he or isn't he?' game).

Unknown said...

is he or isn't he for jake? i believe that ship has sailed. there was a bit in the ny post (the bastion of journalistic integrity) about someone sitting next to jake at his birthday dinner with his folks. gifts included a clay teapot set and cashmere socks.

Tracee said...

No thanks Ent. I'd prefer a different puffer. Starts with a Matthew ends with a McConaughey. Jake is trying too hard, why even say "for the ladies out there." You know Jake there's a lot of guys out there who wanna bump that.

"Don't fight the feeling."

jax said...

wow he's luck Jonathan didn't just say

"Alright on with it,you like a bit of cock or what?"

I loves me some J. Ross.

Metome said...

Oh, Entertainment Lawyer, what a damn hypocrite you are. As you constantly make fun of Jake yet you are a total liar. Whatever Jake's sexuality he is a better person than you could ever be.

Jerry said...

I absolutely believe the Jake/Reese thing was a publicity gimmick but I can't figure out what was in it for her.

ablake said...

Jake was thinking about the ladies?

First time for everything, I guess.

ablake said...

what was in it for her

Oh that's easy. Pissing off Ryan. Jake is a bigger star.

Metome said...

So many insulting stereotypical comments, so little time. Pathetic to see how immature and insulting people here are about sexuality. Yeah making fun of Jake or any other actor thought to be gay is going to make him "come out of the closet" any faster. Once again Jake looks like the better person than most of you idiots.

intheq, that story was on Defamer, a site with no integrity, not in the NY Post.

Anonymous said...

Reese is an experienced fag hag; her ex husband was notorious for servicing Merv Griffin. Jake takes it up the ass.

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