Friday, December 26, 2008

Ted C. Blind Item

Hot couples earnestly trying to procreate in Hollywood usually get such great, fawning press, just ask Marcia Cross and her man, or Josh Holloway and his gal, if you don't believe. But, what about when it all goes...wrong?

That's the certainly less celebrated coverage you hear about, and for good reason: Smokey Shooter and Mimi Kitten are one smokin' celeb couple—literally. And even though the multitalented lovebirds have a bunch of differences between them (namely, their ages), there's one thing they can settle on: They want a kid. Badly.

But there are two problemos in this offspring sitch:

First up, Mimi's had some issues with her ovaries—they ain't working. So M.K. and Smokey hightailed over to their friendly neighborhood fertility clinic to work it all out with a bit of help from their doc.

A baby would be a better possibility if it wasn't for the second dilemma—Smokey's dabbling in drugs has gone from a weekend hobby to a nearly full-time day gig, and it's messing with the dude's sperm. Too bad, 'cause a baby between these two could give Suri and Shiloh a run for their parents' money.

Get clean, you dopehead! Your woman's got enough probs as it is!

And It Ain't:

Calista Flockhart and Harrison Ford
Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer
Katie Lee Joel and Billy Joel

40 comments:

surfer said...

Ashton & Demi?

captivagrl said...

my thought too surfer!

MISCH said...

Not sooo sure ..DEMI'S 3 aren't so pretty.....

HannahPalindrome said...

Mariah Carey

Bxrlvr said...

I agree - my first thought was Ashton and Demi.

jagerlilly said...

The "give Suri and Shiloh a run for their parent's money" makes me think that it would be a good looking baby so how about ScarJo and Ryan??

Unknown said...

has to be mariah, emancipation of mimi!!

MnGddess said...

Actually my first thought was Charlize Theron and her b/f whom I can't remember. Then I thought of Mariah but she ain't gonna get fat for a baby. If it is Ashton and Demi - I don't know. The three girls she currently has are really odd looking. And they barely resemble either parent. It would be a cute one if he/she looks more like Ashton. A lot more.

palealebrew10 said...

I thought of Mariah Carey first because of the Mimi nickname. But boy do I love the Ashton/Demi guess.

Goodgrief said...

I like the Mariah and Nick guess.Except I really think she is already pregnant. There is probably a good reason why Demi would have non working ovaries, it's called MENAPAUSE.

watcher said...

Summary of Clues:
• smokin’ celeb couple
• multitalented lovebirds (each is multitalented?)
• many differences between them, including their ages
• each wants a child together badly
• she has ovary problems
• he takes so many drugs now it is affecting his sperm - used to be weekend, now almost daily use
• produce cut child, high profile enough to compete with celebrity of Cruise/Holmes and Pitt/Jolie

Review clues re: Demi Moore/Ashton Kutcher:
• yes, hot celebrity couple
• yes, multitalented Ashton is actor, former model, produced Punked and Beauty and the Geek
• yes, multitalented Demi is actor and co-produced & produced movies, produces through own company Moving Pictures
• age difference about 15/16 years - Demi about 46, Ashton about 30
• difference - publicly she is known to have bio children, but he does not
• what other differences?
• Demi is at the age of declining fertility so statistically one would say she is very likely to have ovary problems

Con: the Suri/Shiloh clue suggests that an ultra cute child would sell. There would be uncertainty if Demi, like many women her age, had to use donor eggs.

jax said...

scarjo and ryan ftw.

smokey (smokin' aces)
kitten (scarjo's image)

notachance said...

I don't even thing Demi w/ Ashton could produce a cutie like Suri or Shiloh.

brendalove@gmail.com said...

I think Rumer is the perfect combination of Demi and Bruce. She has Demi's cute little face on a big ol' Bruce Willis head.

I think a Demi/Ashton offspring stands a much better chance of giving Suri and Shiloh a run for the money with no Bruce Willis sperm in the mix.

FrenchGirl said...

i think as every one demi&ashton!

Now! said...

Smoking weed could certainly be Ashton's full-time gig these days. What else has he been doing?

Age difference between ScarJo and her husband isn't noticeable enough to fit this blind.

kanonymous said...

There isn't a large age difference between Charlize and her boyfriend.

I think Mariah and Nick are a good guess. Mariah is still young enough for it to be noteworthy that her ovaries don't work (she's significantly older than Nick, yet she's young enough where menopause is highly unlikely). For people like Demi, it's a given that her ovaries don't work, due to her age.

kanonymous said...

Demi and Ashton were already a revealed blind vice and Ted doesn't give people more than one nickname, so I doubt it is them--unless Ted has changed his rules without telling us.

BlahFrickinBlah said...

I immediately thought of Mariah and Nick. They are both good looking--I'm not so sure of competing with Shiloh but I think their kid has the potential of being better looking than Ashton and Demi's kid. IMO. They have an age difference (10 yrs), she's at the age where she should be looking into poppin out a kid before she's too old (38). He wants a kid to lock down on her money. I could see Nick being a smoker. They are jetting around for her career so much so there isn't much for him to do besides bong hits. I could see Mariah being pregnant but not showing her ass on the street for the majority of the pregnancy. Lipo to follow the kiddo. I hear she's a big fan of it already.

Stacy said...

I'm on board with Mariah and Nick. Mimi/Mariah is already a nickname, Kitten due to her well known Hello Kitty obsession. Nick/Smokey - ok I don't know about that, but Cannon/Shooter make sense! All the other clues fit and they're a good looking couple. Plus, Mariah would have that kid in every photo opp, just like Suri and Katie.

audrey said...

How about John Corbett and Bo Derek. They have been together for a very long time, and there is an age difference there.

Unknown said...

Are Mimi & Nick both multi-talented? And would their kid really be anywhere near as noteworthy as Shiloh or Suri? Nick's not all that famous. Plus, I doubt Ted would use Mariah's actual nickname in a BI.

What was the blind vice that was revealed to be Demi & Ashton? I think Ted would def come up with new nicknames if he'd already had a reveal with the old nicks, otherwise it wouldn't be blind.

nunaurbiz said...

For people like Demi, it's a given that her ovaries don't work, due to her age.

kanonymous:

FYI, I'm a year older than Demi and my ovaries are still working!!!! You must be very young to think every woman in her 40s has shriveled ovaries. Depends on the woman and when she started menstruation, among other variables.

Barb said...

Eva Longoria and Tony Parker

Allie said...

Definitely thought of Mariah and Nick first and then Janet Jackson and Jermaine D popped into my head.

Goodgrief said...

Oh, I like the Eva and Tony guess. He is a basketball shooter. She smokes, I don't know about him. Maybe he is a smokin basketball shooter.

Unknown said...

CZJ and Michael Douglas?

nancer said...

how are mariah and nick multi-talented? i think this is NOT them. i like the ashton/demi pick. it fits all the information.
she had hideous children with bruce. but a kid with ashton just might be cute.

Miss X said...

I like the Eva/Tony guess except they aren't multi-talented. And would Tony be doing drugs considering he's an athlete?

Eeny Beeny Meeny said...

Don't forget that Demi's "cute little face" is the result of medical intervention over the years. If you look at her high school yearbook pic, you can see that it isn't just Bruce's fault that the girls look the way they do!

But I'm sure they are lots of fun and have great personalities...

PotPourri said...

Demi produced 3 fugly children. Sorry. That leaves them out. Ashton's twin brother is as attractive as Demi's children. They are off on their genetic blessings, so if Ted thinks it's them, he is sorely wrong.

I can't imagine anybody who could sell like Shiloh and Suri, except for Anniston and Mayer's child because of Aniston.

Robyn said...

well.. one I don't think scarjo and her hubby, or eva and hers are 'multi-talented'..

another thought would me Madonna and ARod.... Madge would deff qualify as multitalented and and they deff have and age difference.. and considering they just ended marriages any child for them would be huge publicity...

And I don't buy the ashton and demi one cause she already has fugly kids so who is to say she'd actually have cute ones this time?>

Modesty said...

What about Sandra Bullock and her man? She's multi-talented (actress, has her own company that produces films) and he can fix stuff and has TV shows (granted, it's mostly about fixing stuff). His IMDB profile is impressive, with credits as exec producer.
I know Sandy's apparently touchy on the subject of kids. And I can see Jesse loving the weed.

catherine said...

I am saying Eva and Tony. They are multi-talented, meaning different talents between them.

Unknown said...

I doubt it's Eva and Tony - not enough of an age difference between them.

I'm torn between the Ashton & Demi guess or the Nick & Mariah guess.

TV said...

what about Beyonce and JayZ? that was my first thought

catherine said...

but would you think a baby with Jay-Z would be attractive?

catherine said...

but would a child with Jay-Z be considered attractive?

Ms. said...

@nunaurbiz

Fertility in women starts to decline by age 30. It dramatically decreases around age 35-36. By 40, a woman has only a 5% chance of getting pregnant.

Special MOM said...

after reading the comments and reading over the BI again it's gotta be Mariah and Nick. Just the aliases alone are too close. Mimi kitten just screams Mariah and her freaky Hello Kitty obsession!

Nick & Marian is my guess...

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